Done Adulting Vol. 1 Ch. 108

“What looks good to you, Jamie?”

“Um ... the pot pie.”

“Good choice on a day like today,” Amanda said. “I think the temperature is falling. Could get cold tonight.” They were seated at a heavy wooden table in a restaurant that looked like its heyday was long past, but the decor was a deliberate effort to make the place seem homey and old fashioned. Red-and-white checkered curtains covered the bottom half of the plate-glass windows fronting the sidewalk on Main Street, and the waitress wore an apron. The place was full but not crowded or loud, and Jamie’s feet dangled from the primitive wooden highchair he had to sit in to reach the table.

“You alright there, Jamie,” Mel asked.

“This thing is uncomfortable. They could have at least carved a butt groove or something.”

“You want out,” Mel asked.

“Can I, Mom?”

“Of course.” Mel helped him out and situated him in her lap.

“What are we doing after lunch,” he asked.

“Walking up and down Main Street and stopping in the shops. Just whatever looks interesting. Maybe we’ll find something warm for you tonight,” Becky said.

“I’ve got three waters and one milk,” the waitress said when she came back. They hadn’t said otherwise, so she brought the milk in a bottle instead of a sippy cup.

“Could we get that in a sippy cup instead,” Amanda asked.

“This is fine,” Jamie said. He was thirsty and didn’t want to wait.

“Never mind, I guess,” Amanda chuckled.

“Are ready to order?” They were and did.

“I wish they had some crayons,” Mel said, smiling down at Jamie, remembering their dinner date at the pizzeria. Jamie saw her expression and understood it was an invitation. He decided he wanted to play along with her. An afternoon of shopping might get boring, and a little extra attention from her would keep things interesting.

“Can you please help me with this,” he asked, looking pointedly at the bottle. Becky had never seen the two of them interact this way before, what Amanda referred to as a game Jamie played with Mel, deliberately behaving littler than was normal for him and being treated accordingly. Now she was keen to see it and learn what, if anything, she could do to get Jamie to behave littler with her, other than getting him hopped up on her milk.

“O? You need help, huh? We couldn’t let a little boy go thirsty.” Mel picked up the bottle and pulled Jamie back so he was laying against her, then brought the nipple to his mouth. Amanda looked on approvingly. She liked that Mel enjoyed Jamie so much, and she wasn’t sure why. It wasn’t just that she liked Mel enjoying Jamie and being his friend, but that she liked Mel enjoying a little. Watching her feed him, she couldn’t help but think Mel looked even prettier holding him.

“So,” Becky said, “The semester is more than half over. Are you ready for finals yet?”

“We still have a few more weeks of classes,” Mel said.

“I mostly have term papers this semester,” Amanda said. “I’d rather have finals. Those are easier.”

“Which one are you most worried about?”

“My little studies one.”

“I think you have the secret to that right here. What do you have to write about,” Becky asked.

“I’ll help you, Manda.”

“Thanks, Jamie Bear. I can pick anything we covered in class; I just have to write about it using either a case study or some statistical analysis.”

“Do you know what topic you want to write on yet?”

“I’m not sure yet.”

“I could be a lot of case studies. Pick your favorite, and we’ll make it work,” Jamie said with a wink. Becky tilted her head, unsure what Jamie meant by that; if it was what she thought, it was the first time she’d ever heard of a little helping a student, let alone a college student, fudge for a grade.

“What about you, Mel?” Becky had tutored Mel when she was in high school and struggling with her science classes.

“Math. Think you can help me, Jamie?”

“Nope.” He stunk at math, hadn’t needed anything of the basics since he was in graduate school, and was sure he had no clue about whatever advanced math Mel was learning.

“Ugh! No fair!” Mel pretended to be put out.

“Sorry.”

“Sorry? Sorry? If I fail it’s gonna be all your fault!” She gently tickled him under his arms, not so much that he squeeed too loudly but enough that he laughed and squirmed on her lap and sighed when she was done, wishing she wasn’t.

“Hey, Mom,” Jamie said mischievously, “If Mel fails out of college, can you hire her as my nanny?” That got a laugh out of everyone, but Mel still pretended to be offended.

“That’s it. I’m not speaking to you for the rest of the day.”

“But ...”

“Nope.”

“But ...”

“Nada, zilch, zero, nuh-uh.”

Jamie huffed and turned so he was facing her more, laying his head on her chest. “I’m sorry.”

“How sorry?”

“Um... So sorry that I’ll ...” He wasn’t sure what he could offer in penance. “I’ll ... draw you a picture later.”

“Of what?”

“Of us.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“I’d like that a lot ... Ope, lunch is here.” When everyone was served, Jamie took a bite and quickly swallowed it, immediately reaching for his milk.

“Too hot,” Becky asked.

“Yeah.”

“Here,” Mel said, taking his fork and loading it with a small bite. She blew on it first and held it out for Jamie. He leaned forward and took the bite. “Better?”

“Mhmm. It’s good.” Becky couldn’t remember the last time Jamie had eaten solid food from her hand; she wasn’t sure if ever he had. If he had, certainly it was way back close to when he had arrived. Not that she missed it considering how she was feeding him now.

Amanda took out her phone and snapped a picture with the fork in mid-air. Jamie and Mel were doing their own thing. Mel switched to a spoon, which was easier for their game.

“Here’s a big bite ... Open wide for the choo-choo. Chuggachuggachugga ... in it goes!” Jamie smiled as she held the spoon in his mouth and carefully withdrew it to minimize the mess she was making on his face. If she failed out college, she certain wouldn’t be landing a railroad job.

“You’re being silly,” Jamie said.

“Me? I’m not the one pretending his mouth is a train tunnel. That’s you! That’s Jamie Bear, you silly wittle boy!” She kept alternating the spoon with sips from his bottle. “Isn’t it? Isn’t dat you? Just a silly wittle Jamie Bear!” Jamie was getting full and said so by not opening his mouth for the next spoonful. “Does your tummy need a little break?”

“Mhmm.” She put the spoon down and began to eat her own lunch. Jamie laid back against her again and let the comfort food do its thing.

When the bill had paid, they walked out onto the sidewalk, Jamie riding Mel’s hip. She put him in his stroller and buckled him in, a rarity.

“It’s almost your nap time, Baby Bear. Why don’t you try to close your eyes,” Becky suggested. “Do you have your paci?” He reached into his pocket for his paci, fumbled with it, and dropped it onto the sidewalk.

“Uh-o!” Mel picked it up, put it in her own mouth first to clean it off, then offered it to Jamie. He took it. He’d always been uncomfortable sharing utensils and glasses, but he didn’t think to think anything of putting his paci in his mouth after it had been in Mel’s “There you go, buddy.” She planted a kiss on the top of his head and straightened up.

Becky caught her eye, mouthing ‘thank you’ and smiling. Her daughter, her little, and the girl who practically grew up at her house were having a good day, and she was especially proud of how good a person Mel had grown into.

“Why do you think he does that,” Becky asked after Jamie had fallen sleep. “You make it look so easy with him.”

“I don’t know,” Mel responded. “I haven’t given it much thought. It just kind of started happening that one time, and ever since we’ll just play that way. Sometimes he starts, sometimes I do, and he always plays along.”

“It’s because you’re not always around,” Amanda said. “It’s a safe game. He can play it without worrying that he’s always going to be treated like that. If we do it, it could become a lifestyle.”

“He does seem to enjoy it, though,” Becky mused.

“Lots of things are enjoyable in small bursts. He just doesn’t want it to be all the time.”

“Well, I’m glad he has fun with you that way,” Becky said, “I wish he would do that more.”

“He already does it a lot more than when he got here. A lot more,” Amanda reminded her.

“Still ...”

“You wish he were more regressed,” Mel asked Becky.

She sighed in response. “No; I like that we get to know him in ways you can’t ever know other littles, and I don’t want him regressed if he doesn’t want to be. I just love how sweet he gets when he feels so little. I love my little guy. And he doesn’t think about all that baggage when he’s like that. He’s just happy.”

“The therapist says he’s doing really well,” Amanda said, “Progress wise. Not perfect. He still has his bad days, but overall.”

“I guess I’ve never seen that, his bad days. What’s that like,” Mel asked.

“Like trying to control a tornado,” Becky answered. “I’ve never seen a little get that kind of angry. It’s not like a regular tantrum usually, more like he fixates on someone or something and just can’t let it go. Like that man in the store.”

Amanda nodded knowingly, grimacing as if to confirm that, yes, it really had been that bad. “O, did he lose his shit over that. Jamie reached for something on a shelf and this guy told him not to touch. I mean, not his place but also not that big a deal for a regressed little. I don’t know if he was primed for who or whatever pissed him off, or if was just triggered right then or there. Jamie called him things I was afraid to even look up … Still, I prefer that to his sad moods.”

“They don’t last as long as they used to,” Becky said.

“No. There’s just not much we can do to help when he’s like that. Dr. Mary’s advice on how to calm him down when he’s angry or upset works, but there’s not much we can do when he’s just melancholy except be there with him. I don’t think he even knows why he gets like that some days. I used to think he was just avoiding talking about it, but now when he says he doesn’t know why he’s sad, I think he really doesn’t. Or at least it’s not something specific.”

“What makes him feel better,” Mel asked.

“Snuggling and nursing,” Becky said. “Thank god he tried to nurse from you that one time. If he hadn’t, I don’t think we would have started. That’s a sure-fire way to slow down his emotions. Always calms him down. Doesn’t exactly cheer him up when he’s in a funk, but it sort of, I don’t know, gets him to more mellow kind of sad.”

“Sometimes he’ll lay down on his tummy in front of me and waits for me to start massaging his back. Never says a word. By the time we’re done, he’s at least relaxed.”

“I like it when he naps on me,” Mel said. “He just feels so good to hold, all tiny and soft and warm.” She couldn’t help herself from smiling with her whole body, shuddering a little.

“Maybe you should get a little one day,” Becky said.

“O, I don’t know. Right now I just like being his friend.”

“More like an aunt at this point,” Amanda said.