Chapter 131 - Arc 9 - Let's Play a Game: Bad End Avoided, Question Mark?

This chapter is a big one. This is technically a potential quit point. It's a little jarring by nature, but I like this and I think anyone who would be hit too hard by this scene was already hit far earlier.

I worked with my beta to try and make this as palatable as possible, and this was always planned in the story.
I like my plans, so uh, I hope you will too.

Thank you for your support, I've only come this far because of you.

This chapter has been redone and is formally known as "Clocktower"

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“What the, Sakura!” The golden light that tears up the sky doesn’t scare him very much. Sakura doing something weird is just a fact of Naruto’s everyday life and she’s actively in combat with a powerful chaotic force. Sakura told him she has a little holy power and while he is now sure she was underplaying it, the truth is that’s a good thing. For whatever reason the forces attacking her are weak to holy and if he remembers from games that also means they heal when poisoned?

He hopes she’s not using poison. “Do you think I should head over now? Most of my non-reserve explosive tag clones died in all that fire, and I've been kind of worried since Sasuke took off.” He is of course talking to the dog at his side, one which he’s had to hold down with ten clones since Sakura started fighting. Its growls and attempts to tear at the ground in response to his question make it completely clear that it is mad at him and wants nothing more than to charge into battle itself. Sakura was right to leave him here though, that holy light would have probably made him poof. If it wasn’t for his job creating the exit strategy - which is kind of hard when he’s not there and the entire area is on fire and exploding - he’d already be in the fight getting mercilessly torn apart like the others.

It’s genuinely what he’d prefer, he’s pissed she gave him this role and she will be hearing about it for years. Still, making sure they can all get out is just as important as fighting and there were more clones there than he could personally provide in any normal period anyway so it’s not like he hasn’t been there. The memories flooding his brain are too much for him to sort through so he’s not entirely sure what’s going on but he’s trying. He regrets not learning real combat skills beside the clones and his fists, the reality that he’s actually more valuable outside of the fight is not one that makes the pit in his stomach any lighter.

“Why’s the dog out of the fight?” The voice at his side is accented with a cute “ark!” which makes it pretty clear who’s talking before he even looks over at the rugged boy. His hoodie is a little damaged by the forest’s trials, and he looks positively furious about something, but he’s not foaming at the mouth so Naruto’s sure it’s not suddenly rabies.

“Sakura said she’s willing to sacrifice all her summons except him, and based on that explosion just now…” Naruto trails, looking at Kiba’s red fang like tattoos on his cheek and nodding in recognition of his presence.

“I’m not sure how to feel about that.” Kiba’s palm lands on the struggling dog and something he does instantly calms it down. His fingers glide over the back of its neck, one hand reaching under its chin and scratching it just right. Naruto’s struck with the thought that if guarding the dog is going to become a regular job he might need lessons from Kiba. “On one hand, leaving your ninken out of the fight is disrespectful, on the other hand, I wouldn’t bring Akamaru either if I was planning to die.”

“What?” Naruto’s eyes widen, “well that can’t be the case, wouldn’t he die if she did since he’s a summon?”

“Are you sure of that or do you just think that?” Kiba asks, before a blur of bugs appears next to him followed by the shiest girl Naruto knows. “She once told me the rings she carries can generate and provide mana. Given the written instructions she gave mom and me on how to use them to feed him…”

“That does sour the moment.” The bug swarm reveals itself to be an intruding Shino.

Naruto really didn’t worry about the first explosion, but the second is different. With new perspective and fear in his heart, Naruto looks up as not just smoke but ethereal blue flames take up the sky and continue towards them. The heat can be felt from their clearing, and trees are disintegrating on contact while the all consuming glow continues outwards in a sea of flame. The first three seconds are full of fear for Sakura, the next three are for fear for everyone else. “Based on my math, that is big enough to cover the whole forest before it stops,” Shino observes, “I do believe we are dead.”

“Well, if that’s the case.” Naruto trusts Sakura more than anything, and while it goes against everything he believes in, Sakura would sacrifice herself a hundred times before she asked anyone else to sacrifice for her. So when she suggested they rig a suicide trap that would likely catch him inside it he knew she’d thought about it long and hard. The fact that it would likely catch Ino in it sort of compounds that fact. He’d argued but she’d argued right back, the only thing they need to do to disarm them is to pop the clones and it’s not like anyone would be dumb enough to try to set them off themselves. If nothing else the mere threat of it should stop most foes in their tracks. They’d settled on a simple idea, that it was better to have it and disarm it when it’s not needed, than to not have it at all if it turned out hell had awakened in some dumb way..

She said she’d send him a signal, a very clear and obvious one that could not be misconstrued. Something that makes it clear beyond even a shadow of a doubt that the enemy force is too much and needs to die here for the good of the village, their parents, Haku, Hanabi, Konohamaru, and anyone else they’ve found the place in their heart to hold onto.

Killing them all with an explosion the size and power of which probably no one’s ever seen before? He can’t imagine a clearer signal. He makes a seal, and the gentlest frown forms on his face. His eyes hold his whole life, a river has broken the dam and now every hug he’s ever gotten, every pat on the head, every smile he’s ever received, they all come flooding in at once.

For Mebuki, for Kizashi, no, for mom and dad and everyone else who’s ever shown him love.

He sends out the signal and activates the explosive tags. May whatever force of darkness that stands against them cease to exist.

He trusts Sakura, and it sucks but he can hope she has a plan, right?

She wouldn’t really let everyone she’s ever known die in a flame of their creation, destroying all creation and eradicating an entire forest in the process? If nothing else, this forest is really important to her and Ino’s childhood, so even rigging explosives in it had to hurt her heart. Signalling him to activate them like this? “I haven’t had a lot of chances at goodbyes so I’m not really good at them.” Naruto says, “What are the odds Sakura’s found some kind of foolproof plan to warp us all to another dimension before we die?”

“I’ve bet on dumber things.” Kiba says, as he’s wiped off the face of the planet by a ball of flame.

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“What the-” A sudden shockwave shakes the dishes right out of Mebuki’s hands, and only Haku’s quick movement stops them from shattering onto the floor. Instead they shatter into his hands, as do the windows. A force sends them both onto the floor, and their hearing is completely shot before she has the time to realize what’s going on. It takes her a few seconds to realize the image she’s staring at isn’t real, it’s been burnt into her eyes. Blinking several times and pushing some medical chakra towards her delicate eyes is enough to clear it, but she almost wishes she hadn’t.

The window’s shattered, getting up allows her to see that the neighbor’s windows are too. The world is a little brighter, and in the distance there’s enough flame and smoke and moving black clouds for her to think something from one of Sakura’s games came to life right in front of them. “That’s the forest of death.” She whispers, knowing no one will hear it. Kizashi is quick to the window right after her, and he pulls her into a hug before her eyes can begin leaking.

Reality hasn’t set in yet, her brain is still trying to understand what just happened, like most of Konoha, but he knows it will. It already has for him. His only hope is that stupid system of hers will bring her back somehow.

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[You Are Dead, please hold]

Her eyes blink open to take in the message floating above her in red.

She didn’t get that in Wave, sorry, Sakura Country. At least she doesn’t remember getting that.

Hold? Death would be an understaffed customer service number, wouldn’t it.

Her ears are filled with a million ticks and tocks. A simple glance around the message reveals she’s in a tower made entirely of clocks. Looking up and down, she quickly notices that the faces behind the glass are all set to different times. There are eighty six thousand four hundred seconds in a day and she’s pretty sure she can see all of them ticking away at once. She does not envy whoever has to change the batteries.

The space between bigger clocks is filled with pocket watches and smaller timepieces. The steps upwards are floating clocks, the lights are bright glow in the dark clocks, the flooring below her appears to be floating clocks so smashed together they ignore outside forces like gravity because she can see a void below through the cracks between them.

“Nowhere to go but up I guess.” She’s never been one to take in the sights, and she’s not about to start now. This would either be the worst time ever or the best time ever to become artistically interested in something.

Her armor is missing so it’s not completely surprising when she steps forward and finds her efforts to dull her steps and reinforce the ground beneath her do absolutely nothing. Her chakra responds to her attempts to move it by pretending it doesn’t exist. A quick check tells her that her mana is still accessible, but what good is that here? She didn’t learn flight or anything, though that should probably go on the list. She didn’t learn a single magic ability besides raising the dead and the small quirky nonsense that comes with that. Apparently that includes dying painfully, she really hopes Sasuke and Gaara survived by merit of being behind her.

“Cool, no Jutsu.” She’s happy to note the glass on the clocks beneath her feet doesn’t break even when she takes bigger and more confident steps. Even with ninja training she’s not dainty enough to be using brittle glass as her walkway so the lack of crunches and cracks makes her let out a breath she wasn’t aware she was holding.

One awkward step after another takes her to the staircase where she proceeds to ascend with a sense of purpose. Despite the clocks it’s strangely easy to lose track of time. The constant tocking causes her head to spin and before long she looks down and finds she can’t find the bottom anymore. Where she started has simply ceased to exist in the low light given to her by the glowing objects in her surroundings. In fact it continues on for so long she’s run out of things to panic and have an anxiety fit over. If she didn’t have as high a constitution as she does, she’s sure she would have passed out long ago, but she doesn’t feel even the slightest burn in her feet or desire to breathe any deeper. Shouldn’t she have a walking skill by now with all of her constant traveling?

The relatively innocent thought of a walking skill has an actual eternity to percolate before she finds herself suddenly stopped by a light. Excitement beats in her heart and she rushes towards it, finding the world tilting ever so slightly as she runs along a ceiling without chakra and slowly twirls around until gravity is back and she’s standing in a doorway of chiseled stone.

Her lungs empty in relief, nothing like a multi-hour long intro sequence to make her feel like what’s ahead is important. She allows her eyes to adjust to the new light, a shining beacon blinding all but the most fervent of daywalkers. It feels a bit like waking up too early and instantly opening the curtains.

It takes her a solid minute, but when she can finally stop using both her arms to protect her eyes from the filthy sun, she takes them away and finds herself looking into a castle throne room. A long red carpet flows with belonging across a floor made of stone squares chiseled by an expert mason. Her own craftsman abilities allows her to take in the way the pillars are made, the way the torch holders are placed directly in the middle of the stones, and even appreciate the throne which stands golden and magnificent with purple cloth cushioning. She imagines it’s still somewhat uncomfortable, that is the burden of a king after-all. Well, one of the burdens of a king.

Walking in she finds her footsteps are loud, and before she gets very far she spots a pile of random crap to the side. It’s so out of place in the well taken care of room, not a spec of dirt anywhere but a massive pile of random objects are just there aimlessly existing. Her feet take her to them quickly, and she’s looking through them before she can stop herself to stay on task.

She was aimless in life, why stop now? She finds books, swords, clocks, board games, that’s a giant hammer. Armor, papers, bows and ornamental gemstones, a crown, a - it’s a really big pile and she’s bored.

“I hate you.” She hears from behind her, an older woman’s voice sounds comfortingly familiar but different enough from any she recognizes to give her a sense of uncanny valley. She’s not sure whose voice it sounds like, but she’s sure she knows someone close to them. Turning to view a taller figure - but not by much - shows her a dark robe that reaches the floor, black gloves over thin hands and a hood covering an angular face. Pink hair idly peeks out behind it, the hood being just a little too big to entirely hide the bright feature. There’s a fox mask of all things over her face. “I really, really, really hate you.” She’s standing in front of the throne, and even without her words Sakura can hear a hidden tone chiming like she’s about to cry. Her fingers are balled into fists, and she speaks again. “Why?”

“I don’t understand.” Sakura quirks one eyebrow up and the other down, lowering her head a little in a show of sincerity that she’s not sure actually makes sense. She’s trying, that’s what matters.

“Every item you see in that pile is a waste.” The woman points, “another world tossed aside to find the one you that might actually be able to stop our tragedy.”

“So the Hammer-” Sakura asks-

“A Sakura that went into banditry, it was a little weird, I thought the difference was a good sign.” The woman explains, throwing a hand out, “she was torn apart and not in that fun way. She didn’t even make it to the part that matters.”

“And this book-” Sakura picks up a book with a complex exterior design, it says ‘player’s manual’.

“A Sakura that was really into tabletop role playing games, the system let her choose her race and she went orc because Sasuke said he liked strong girls.” The woman says, pointing at the book with a scoff.

Sakura finds herself laughing at that, “imagine caring about what Sasuke likes in girls. “

“That’s almost every one of you.” The figure says, stepping closer, “your lack of obsession is what made me think you’d succeed. That and most interfaces suck, a gaming interface felt like it would be a huge improvement on everything else. That’s why I chose to watch you instead of moving on.”

“You chose, I’m sorry back up.” Sakura raises a finger in question, and finds it smacked aside by the irate masked figure. Before she can figure out why, she finds her top grabbed and her body lifted into the air by the gloved hand. It hurts a little, but she’s dealt with worse many times so she ignores it in favor of staring into the bright green eyes that shine through the mask.

“No, Sakura, you back up. I gave you the perfect route, I did everything in my power to push you towards the right call, I even made sure you wouldn’t enter this stupid fucking exam by showing you your death!” The woman’s knuckles whiten, holding Sakura’s collar with enough force that she’s pretty sure she’d be losing consciousness if this place didn’t exist outside of conditions or weariness.

“Err, that could have been clearer-” Sakura gulps-

“No! It couldn’t have!” Within an instant she finds herself smashing against the pile, scattering objects all around while rolling over to right herself. “I only have so much ability to contact you, I can’t change much, even the message I sent to you through your sword’s mindspace got the world pissed enough at me I had to sit here and watch you die instead of chiming in. Do you have any idea how painful that is?”

“I really don’t understand, you’re talking to me now so clearly you-” Sakura picks herself up, only to see the woman throw her head back.

In fact, she throws her gloved hands up, “You’re dead! The universe doesn’t care if I talk to a fucking dead person, okay? You are super, mega, ridiculously fucking dead. You’re more dead than everyone I’ve ever loved and that’s an accomplishment, you had to earn that!”

Sakura eyes the big red messaging floating above her. She thought maybe it was a joke, but if she’s seriously gone, what should she even do about that? One would think she’d care more, she’d think she cares more. But somehow this feels right? She died taking out Orochimaru of all people, ninety nine percent of ninja never accomplish anywhere close to that, one of the boogeyman they were told would haunt them if they didn’t go to bed on time is gone. That’s an okay life, regardless of what this figure says. As long as Naruto didn’t do something stupid like take this as a signal, which he might have. The ideal situation is that he sent out a quick command through a new clone and every single one killed themselves so that the tags wouldn’t be set off by the magical flames. “So the otherworld transference plan didn’t uh… work?” Sakura asks.

“Why would that have worked? I thought you were smart.” The figure points at her, her fingers sparking with an electrical signature filled with mana.

“Well I mean, I didn’t have a lot of options once uh… you know, death was trying to kill me.” Sakura points out, “I missed your hint, what do you want from me?”

“Do better.” The figure stomps, revealing there’s boots underneath there, metal boots too by the clank. Ninjas don’t normally wear boots, so it begs a lot of questions. “Don’t die again.”

“Are you saying it’s not over?” Sakura asks, “you really saved me in Wave?”

“No dummy, Haku saved you in Wave. Only the last hitpoint matters, remember that.” There’s a shake of her head. “Come with me, we need to talk and we only have a few minutes.”

“Ah…” Well that answers that question at least. It’s nice to hear some resolution on something she’s been wondering., “if you can’t revive me how am I supposed to do better and not die again?”

“Because your stupid plan worked.” The woman growls under her breath, holding back what’s clearly a well of emotions not explicitly meant for her. “Come.” She hurries away, forcing Sakura to run after her. A hallway opens up and they walk through it at a pace that’s just fast enough Sakura only has a few moments to look at the windows flooding it with light. Except they’re not windows, they’re videos. Each and every one of them is a video of something horrific.

Naruto’s corpse. “Uh, I don’t get it.”

“I’m not some god, I’m not even an admin, I’m a hacker. It’s the only skill my worthless ass managed to pick up in between bottles of scotch since his death in my worthless arms.” The woman says, continuing to walk her through. Every flick of Sakura’s gaze shows her another corpse, another bloody mess. “Each world has its own system, it’s meant to right wrongs and look over reality to prevent corruption. When something strange happens, it steps in and chooses a hero. In some worlds this system is very infantile, barely able to do anything. Yours is advanced because it was needed back in Hashirama’s day and then again with the fourth. It imbued them with the power to fight back against invading corruption.”

“Err, that’s kind of a lot. You’re basically telling me aliens exist.” Sakura snickers-

“Yes. And believe it or not, I do not fucking care about that in the least.” Sakura’d question just how much this girl swears but she’d swear too if she’d seen Naruto die this many times.

“Sooo, what is all this?” Sakura finally allows herself to ask.

“In my world Naruto and I fell in love, and Sasuke ripped his heart out in front of me.” The woman explains. “In the bandit’s world, Naruto joined her because of some stupid crush, and Sasuke hunted them down and tore them both down. They managed to bleed out holding each-other, that was cute.” She explains.

“Errr, not quite what I meant but-”

“I’m not finished.” A gloved hand gets shoved in Sakura’s face. “I have watched thousands of Narutos die, I have watched the world tear itself apart to crush him, I have helped so many Sakura’s try to save her friends and get a happy ending in the hopes that just once I could see it happen and everyone could get their happily ever after. I’ve hacked my way through so many parallel universes I’ve lost my grip on time itself, just to see Naruto get his happily ever after with Hinata - he doesn’t deserve us - and Sasuke revive his clan, but this is the first time I have ever seen Naruto die because of Sakura. Do you have any idea how rare you are? You might be the only Sakura to ever kill Naruto, bing, diamondy sounds, achievement unlocked.”

“Are you done?” Sakura asks with a long, drawn out sigh.

“Not even close. But I think I have to be done in a moment so I’ll skip straight to answers. Naruto was chosen to be Minato’s successor and fight off the next corrupted nonsense, but that’s just a sure way to die painfully so I swapped it to you, like I always do.” The woman continues, her fox mask managing to twitch into a different expression as if it’s alive.

“But if I always fail isn’t that dumb?” Sakura groans.

“If I’m going to figure out an answer I need to work from the same starting point, that’s just how scientific variables work. Now as the Player, forces of nature would find you appealing, fate itself would bend before you. You should have had the ability to commune with spirits and nature and sense danger. Those dungeons you’ve been given are actually opportunities for you to clear some corruption and clean up your world and get rewarded for it. I know it’s complicated and feels stupid.” The woman pauses to give Sakura a chance to roll her eyes, “I also know this would have been great information to have before now but again, not a god, just a hacker. Everytime I directly influenced your life, the system would attack and I’d have to go into hiding before I get snuffed out. I’m needed, if you fail I need to move to the next Sakura and try again, so I can’t risk myself to make your life easier, I can only move when it’s huge and I’m sure I can get away with it… mostly.” There’s a sheepish titter there, she clearly broke that rule getting her that tape of her death.

“And what you’re trying is… you’re on an endless conquest to stop Naruto from dying?” Sakura asks, looking at the nearest video. It’s Naruto getting blown to smithereens, she gets the distinct feeling this is hers.

“No, everyone dies eventually. I’m on an endless conquest to make sure the three of you get to live out long lives together. I will not accept anything else.”

“But-”

“Nothing else!” She shrieks, stomping on the floor with enough power Sakura falls back a step and has to lean against a wall just to keep her footing.

“We’re dead.” Sakura points out.

“As I said, your stupid plan worked.” The woman actually jumps, the unstable hacker across dimensions - which might be the dumbest thing Sakura’s ever heard - giggles with glee as she claps her hands while prancing up and down and wiggling in a way that reminds Sakura of her mother. “It was so stupid and you had no reason to assume that would function, yes, but the barrier between worlds isn’t actually that strong and it’s weak to mana and the world you bombed yourself into happens to have resurrection spells, even if they’re extremely expensive, congratulations, if luck is a skill you are a prodigy.”

“So dying isn’t a big deal?” Sakura winces, knowing she’s about to get yelled at, and sure enough-

“Dying is a huge deal!” She’s pointed at with quite some heat, it makes her nervous. “You can’t just kill everyone in the Chunin exams, that alone would doom this world. Surprise surprise, Orochimaru isn’t the most important threat out there. Even in concepts that technically skipped him all together because I managed to get out a message they understood, other horrific beings show up and ruin everything. Most of the time it’s related to Sasuke, he kinda sucks.”

At least she probably got Orochimaru, right? That’s one threat down. “What do you want me to do about it then?”

“Nothing. You’ve done enough. Opening a rift between the two worlds has created a systemwide communication. Since your system still needs you, and Naruto, and Sasuke, it’s requested your revival. Since I know better I managed to tinker it into requesting everyone from the Chunin exams be revived. All you have to do is sit on your pretty little clueless tush and wait. By this time next year you’ll be horribly indebted to the monster mafia but you’ll all be back home… probably.”

“Probably?” Sakura asks.

“Jeez, if you weren’t one of if not the best run I’ve ever seen… fuck me.” Sakura can hear pain in her voice, but it’s meaningless. It’s not meant for her, it’s a relic of past attempts, someone so busy screaming into the void that, whether it's her fault or not, she’ll be blamed for it because she happens to share an identity with other people this woman knows. Instead of focusing on that, or feeling hurt, she thinks back to the massive pile outside the hall.

“So, how am I the best run if others have made it farther?” Sakura asks with a nervous twitch to her features. Her feet kick the floor, and a sour expression takes over her countenance. She really killed everyone? She’s not that blood thirsty, she never wanted anyone to get hurt in this exam.

“A few made it farther, but they lacked potential or drive, or Sasuke’s betrayal drove them to madness and made them useless.” The woman explains. “You’re not internalizing what I’m saying, he betrays us. Sasuke sucks. Sasuke is an asshole.”

“I just can’t really see it.” Sakura admits with a shrug. “He burnt people alive earlier because they wanted to hurt me, we’ve agreed to take on the world together.”

“Exactly, your Sasuke is the best Sasuke I have ever seen.” The masked woman manages to sound happy about that. “That’s why I sent that message about abandoning you if Sasuke got bitten. If your Sasuke got ruined because you couldn’t save him, well this world’s system might need you but like hell I would stick around. I won’t watch that adorably earnest Sasuke shove his hand through Naruto’s chest and rip out his heart, at least not because you can’t avoid a stupid snake.”

“I guess that makes sense…” Sakura trails. “So we’re going to be revived in another world. How does that work?”

“I don’t know. Either the system will have full reign over there, it’ll be really fuzzy, or it won’t work at all. I’m just not privy to what kind of communication cross world systems work out, and they’re not exactly sapient so even if I was privy to it I wouldn’t necessarily be able to interpret it. Each new world needs a new interpreter and that takes years to develop so most of the time I pick one similar to the previous one and just kinda work out the mess of bits when I get the chance.”

“So, to be clear, Miss Hacker, you’re in no way the system? You’re just some crazy lady that hijacked my life for your own selfish whims?” Sakura asks, giving her a pointed look. “I wasn’t supposed to receive this system?”

“Yes, yes, yes.” The crazy lady nods, bringing her back out into the throne room, where Sakura quickly makes her way back to the pile. She picks up the tabletop book and takes a look at her character sheet, only to instantly recoil. Either this Sakura’s stats were ridiculously, pathetically, criminally low or this system uses a very different number system.

“So your goals are more complicated than us living happily ever after, otherwise you’d just pick a world where we aren’t in a violent profession and arrange a playdate.” Sakura points out, “you’re hiding something from me.”

“And? I don’t owe you anything.” The woman snorts, “I have the luxury of being a bitch, look, all you need to know is that if you get stronger, save your world and keep Naruto and Sasuke alive absolutely everything I want will work out. I will do my best to change variables in the background for you, and you’ll be my sweet bestest Sakura foreverest.”

“Uhh, okay…” Sakura trails, “so to be clear, I do exist-”

“Did exist, you blew up-”

“I am the chosen one specifically because you decided-”

“I did do that-”

“And I still have hundreds of questions.” Sakura growls.

“You let me monologue so we kind of don’t have a lot of time, but uh, I’ll give you three. Quick answers.”

“Why am I not just being handed power?” Sakura asks with a clench of her teeth. This chick really just pointlessly monologued away their entire time? Who does that?

“Handing you power out of nowhere would create corruption, the world needs you to follow the rules and get really powerful and destroy the corruption to right all that is wrong with your chosen one powers, not make things worse.” The woman explains with a wave of her hand, like it’s unimportant nonsense she learned for a test because she had to.

“And your quest has very little to do with that. In fact you’ve barely influenced anything.” Sakura nods in understanding.

“I made sure you were the hero, I’ve given you a few cute quests when I’ve found a vulnerability to exploit, Melody of Hearts was me, but mostly I’m just staring at you from a window really far away and waving.” The woman mimes a wave, which is technically just waving.

“... Could you tell me about yourself?” Sakura asks, looking up at the slightly taller woman. “About myself, you’re obviously me.”

“Not much to tell.” The woman places a hand on her hip and looks around as if experiencing a nervous tick. “I was a runner for a syndicate, we had a bad job and Sasuke killed Naruto, he bled out in my arms and I spent the next thirty years figuring out the code of the universe. I devoted my life to figuring out a way to bring my Naruto back… that didn’t really work out.” Sakura can hear the wince, whatever happened there left a mark on her soul. “So now I’m here, watching you on the verge of bringing back a Naruto you gruesomly murdered because some girls just don’t have to suffer consequences!” She claps again, “I’m actually really happy for you…”

“That sucks.” Sakura throws both hands up. “Sorry you’re putting yourself through that.”

“Yeah… Anyway, save the world and everything I want will work out. Just do it.” The older woman demands.

“You get how stupid that sounds?” Sakura looks back at the bin for something else that’s really cool. Maybe that pair of tanto?

“Life is stupid, deal with it. Now in a few seconds you’re going to wake up. It’ll be better for both of us if you can remember as little of this as possible, so like, do your best to forget I exist… I probably shouldn’t have done this at all.”

“You have no idea how often I say the same thing.” Sakura laughs, shaking her head, “I’m glad to know we share regretting our impulsive decisions. I’ll do my best to forget but, no promises.” As soon as the words leave her mouth Sakura finds herself starting to glow. “Um, what’s happening?” The figure answers the question by raising both her arms in front of her, and raising her middle fingers as the world fades to white.

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Sakura’s eyes open, slowly. Her eyes burn, and the new reality boggles her mind. It feels like something is pounding against her skull and she can’t really handle it.

That the one staring down at her when she wakes up is familiar doesn’t help. With magenta hair and sharp teeth, the one that offered her a reward in explosive goblin souls stands above her in dark plate armor, holding out a hand. “Welcome back to the living. You owe me for resurrecting you.”

“I thought necromancy was your thing, not healing.” Sakura rubs her eyes before taking that outstretched hand. It’s strong, sturdy, she feels protected and safe but not in the way she’d like to feel. The air here feels a little caustic, and it’s very unsettling.

“Necromancy is simply healing but a little late.” The inhuman woman staring into her eyes says, a glimmer of hunger nestled deep inside shows itself vibrantly within them. “It’s also very expensive, and I, despite the request made of me, don’t have the power to resurrect everyone here.”

“What about just my friends?” Sakura can’t help but ask, she knows it’s selfish but, she’d rather Ino have revived than her, Naruto and Sasuke too. Maybe Gaara, since he was with her he’s probably super dead as well.

A shake of the woman’s head dashes Sakura’s hopes. What is it with adults being unhelpful? All her life she grew up hearing about how older people are stronger, better, capable of anything. Here she is, always being let down by crazy older ladies. She’s starting to wonder if that’s just a trait of all women, is her mom crazy too? She sure hopes not, the least she needs to gain from a death experience in another world is sexism. How would that skill be worded? ‘Sexism, level one, you are the problem.’

“Your world has made a request of me, I am to play a game with their souls to see who I’m using my kingdom’s resources on. Do you want to participate and skew the game, or leave it to chance?” The otherworld woman asks. Sakura’s quickly learning from observing that her teeth are just like that, they slit together perfectly into sharp spikes and are likely excellent at tearing through flesh.

“I don’t understand, why does it have to be a game at all?” Sakura asks, looking down and finding she’s in a new white robe. Her armor from haku is gone, that’s too bad, he spent a lot on that. Does that mean this woman clothed her or does the resurrection spell just do that? She tests her Chakra and finds it responds, so she truly is alive. “I should make an informed decision.”

“I had figured you’d be better informed.” Plate gauntlets land on Sakura’s head, rubbing oddly. It feels nicer than it should. “It’s not your fault, but it’s complicated. Let me do my best to explain.”