The end for me feels near...

[Really long ass message btw, just ignore it-]

I'm gonna be honest with y'all, I don't think I'm going to be the animator I want to be. I've been trying to get back on
animation for a while but every time I "try" to finish one, I end up giving up on it, you have no idea how many WIP's I've got stashed in my folder. I don't even know if I can uphold my YouTube channel since I'm not making any videos that people come for and hence I might lose everything after that. All I do is post art and I don't know if that's a good thing to be known for in YouTube y'know? I'm afraid my time is about to end but who knows, I can't really stop drawing because it is the only thing I know what to do. The scary part is that the patrons on Patreon stop donating money to me, that's the scary part and if it does come to that then I might just stop drawing for good.

I'm sorry I'm such a downer by the way, I really do appreciate the support. It's just every insult that comes my way breaks me easily like a nuke in my feelings because I am sensitive as much as I hate to admit it. Thank you guys really, I wouldn't have made it this far if it weren't for you guys.

I guess I'm just used to the fact that I will fail because it has been my nature for my whole life. I never really achieved something "amazing". Sure I got this career but all I really am doing is drawing and that's what everyone else sees in this career, just a drawing job. Very unstable lifestyle I agree but it's all I know and I can't even begin to imagine getting a job, I might get fired faster than any speedrun category lol.

So, what should you take from this extremely long message I made? I don't know if I'm being honest haha. I guess it's the fact that things might end if it doesn't go well for me. And to those people who have told me to try and get a break, I have been trying but I literally could not stop thinking about drawing. But yeah I guess you should take away the fact that I might not be the animator you hoped to be, just probably dump videos here and there but I don't see going too far anymore. I'll still draw of course if it still funds me but right now I feel like the end is very, very near.

That's all I guess, sorry for the long message.