Improper Sex Shop Behavior

[6-word request: Calum Von Moger Sex-Toyed]

[Another guy who didn't need all 6 words!]

Calum took a selfie with a purple dildo the size of his arm. He flexed his huge biceps and held it up to compare their widths, then snapped another one.

“Put it in your mouth!” shouted Calum’s buddy Hunter, who was further down the aisle, trying to fasten a spiked dog collar around his neck. The guy working behind the counter had a mohawk, eyeliner, and piercings in his eyebrows, ears, and lips. He rolled his eyes at the two bronzed meatheads who were making a mockery of the things in the sex shop. “C’mon, big man, you’ve swallowed bigger things than that!”

Calum chuckled as he moved on to a leather harness. “Oh, how about this?” he said, pulling off his tank top and holding the studded apparatus against his bulging chest. “Imagine squeezing all of this muscle into this thing? What do you think?” To the mohawked employee, he shouted, “Hey, bro, chicks dig these things, don’t they?”

Hunter chuckled as he checked himself out in the mirror. The dog collar accentuated the thick muscles of his neck. “Hey, Calum, am I pulling this off or what?” he said.

Calum had slipped the harness on and joined Hunter at the mirror. “Oh, yeah, bro, you look killer with that thing on!” He grabbed a leash from the rack and attached it to Hunter’s collar, yanking the ripped stud around. The two muscleguys chuckled. In the mirror, they saw the pierced guy from the counter standing behind them, hands on his hips. Next to their deeply tanned skin and bulging muscles, he looked even more pale and scrawny.

“You can’t just play around in here,” he said. “If you’re going to buy those things you should take them off.”

“How much is this?” Calum said, flexing with the harness on. He liked how it squeezed his torso, making his muscles pop even more. “I feel like… a fucktoy with handlebars.”

He turned around, noticing the way the employee--his nametag read Chip--lit up at the display of leather-strapped musculature.

“Hey, Chip, buddy, you think I look good in this?”

Chip blinked his eyes and smirked. “I have to be honest, this little image is going in my fantasy file…” His stony demeanor reasserted itself almost immediately. “But you still can’t just screw around in here. These aren’t jokes, people really like these things. What you’re doing is called kink-shaming.”

Calum’s grin dissolved. He nodded thoughtfully. “Good lord, the last thing I want to do here is shame anyone, right Hunter?”

Hunter was still flexing in the mirror. “Yeah, yeah,” he said.

“How about we buy these things, and a couple other little trinkets--” Calum wandered down an aisle and snatched the first package his hand touched. It was a butt-plug the size of a small thermos. “--and maybe we’ll give your store a little boost? We’re kinda big on the internet you know…”

“He is,” Hunter said, nodding in Calum’s direction. “Big time bodybuilder. You see him in that movie? Playing Arnold?”

Chip shrugged.

“Anyway, we’ll pay for this stuff,” Calum said. He bounced his pecs, watching Chip’s eyes drop immediately to Caleb’s rippling torso. Calum fished out his wallet.

“Hey Calum,” Hunter said, walking around the corner with a deflated rubber doll and its open package in the other. “Check out this sex doll. It’s a guy. I didn’t know they made guy sex dolls!”

Calum rolled his eyes for Chip’s benefit. “Of course they do, dummy.”

“You wanna buy this for me?” Hunter said, shaking the doll. It had a cartoonish male face on the top, a little leather cap on its head and a mouth opened in a perfect circle. The doll had the suggestion of pecs and abs drawn on its front as well as a drawn-on harness, just like the one Calum wore. Its arms curled into muscles, although in its current state it looked a little noodly. “Look at his little dick!” he chuckled, flicking the deflated little appendage on the front.

“I’m not gonna buy shit for you,” Calum said as he approached the counter. “Where’s your wallet?”

“In the car!” Hunter said. “I’ll venmo you back, promise.”

“I’ve heard that before.”

Hunter sighed. “Fine,” he said, heading for the door.

“Please don’t take the merchandise outside,” Chip said as he scanned the tag on Calum’s harness.

Hunter sighed, tossing the inflatable doll to the ground. He struggled to unfasten the collar, hustling to Calum’s side for aid when he failed.

“He your boyfriend?” Chip asked as the door closed behind Hunter.

“Ha!” Calum said. “Do we come off as gay?”

“Everyone comes off as gay,” Chip said in a monotone voice as he swiped Calum’s card.

“No, he’s just a complete knucklehead. We’re here for the novelty, to be honest, although I do dig this harness,” he said, running his hands along his new accoutrement. “I do some modeling. Maybe I’ll give the store a shout-out when I get some pictures taken in it!”

Chip licked his lips and smiled. “Uh, what’s your insta? I’d kill to see those pics.”

Calum grinned. “Let me jot that on the back of the receipt.”

Minutes passed and Hunter didn’t return.

“Is your friend coming back?” Chip asked as Calum grew uncomfortable.

“He has been gone a little bit,” Calum said, walking to the door. He peered out. He could see Chip in the car, rustling around. He turned around to see Chip had his phone out, snapping pics of Calum from behind as the bodybuilder leaned toward the door. Chip jumped when he was spotted, shoving his phone back in his pocket.

This could go someplace I don’t want it to, Calum said, looking around. “Maybe I’ll just pay for his stuff so we can get on our way,” Calum said. Chip just shrugged. Calum snatched the dog collar from the floor, then grabbed the packaging for the blow-up doll.

“Hey, where’d that thing go?” Calum said, wandering around the nearby aisles. He spotted it about twenty feet away, down an aisle he and Chip hadn’t ventured down yet. When he reached it he was shocked to see it fully inflated. Chip didn’t blow this thing up, did he? Calum thought as he ran his fingers along the little toy. It was about four-feet tall now. He bopped it gently in the face and watched it tilt over, still in its flexing pose as it drifted gently to the floor. “Does this thing inflate by itself?” Calum called across the store.

“Does it what?” Chip called back, confused. “Honestly, that thing’s on clearance. I’d be shocked if it didn’t have any holes in it.”

“No, it doesn’t have holes,” Calum said, then turned toward the counter with a cheeky grin, “except for the useful ones, that is,” he said with a wink. Chip had lost interest in him, staring back at his phone.

When Calum turned back, the toy was gone. “What the fuck?” Calum said, looking around. The air conditioner blasted out cool air, but no way was the current strong enough to propel the toy out of site without Calum even noticing. He looked around, wandering to the back of the aisle, peering around the corner. “Fuck it,” he said finally. “Sorry, Hunter, but you’re going to have to go without.”

Suddenly he felt something jab hard into his lower back. He turned around, shocked, to see the inflatable man standing upright on its own! Calum grabbed the little nub jutting from his lower back. “The fuck?” he said again, as he realized the sex toy had stabbed it into him!

“Everything okay back there?” Chip called from the front.

Calum touched what felt like an inflation nozzle. As his hand rubbed over it, he heard the plug dislodge. He heard a loud hiss of escaping air, but worse than that, he felt a tingling throughout his well-muscled body.

Calum looked down at his big arms to watch the bulging flesh start to sink and sag. His barrel chest drooped and wrinkled as it collapsed. His mouth went wide as he found his legs wobbling as they, too, seemed to be deflating like the rest of him. “Help me!” he tried to shout, but his voice was weak and came out at half volume, drowned out by the pressure bursting from the nozzle.

Calum turned back to see the sex toy starting to inflate, actual muscles bulging out where they were only drawn on before. The painted hat became real and slid off its head, revealing shaggy locks not unlike Calum’s.

From the front of the store, Calum heard the tinkle of a bell as the door opened. “I’m back!” he heard Hunter say. “Where’s my buddy?”

Calum’s body sank slowly to the ground. He was horrified by the sudden emptiness, the numbness of being suddenly hollow. “Please… help… me…” he tried to shout, but his voice was just a gentle whisper now.

In seconds, the whoosh of the nozzle faded as Calum felt himself flattening out against the floor. He struggled to wiggle his hands and feet but they, too, were rubber, empty, and before he knew it, inanimate.

Meanwhile, what used to be a sex doll swelled with muscle, its rubber “skin” suddenly becoming tan, hard flesh. The modest little bump of a dick it had blossomed into a big, healthy dick--Calum was horrified to realize it was his dick! The doll’s o-shaped mouth turned into a smile as real human teeth appeared.

Calum was now looking up at his exact twin, albeit nude from the waist down. The doppelganger wagged a tongue at Calum, who could only blink and softly moan, as he grabbed Calum’s fallen shorts and shoes, pulling them on his rippling, vascular body.

Calum’s vision suddenly got hazy, as if his face had been wrapped in gauze. He could still hear, but it was all muffled. Everything around him seemed to grow as Calum’s dimensions shrank down to those of the sex toy as it had been when Hunter unwrapped it. Calum’s mouth was just an open hole now. He wasn’t breathing but there was no air starvation. The reason he couldn’t hear his own heartbeat, he realized, was because he was now a plastic toy.

“There you are!” Calum heard Hunter say. “What’s up, big guy, I found my wallet. What are you doing back here?”

The sex toy--now a perfect replica of Calum in an identical harness--shrugged his big shoulders. “This thing’s kind of creepy,” he said, picking up Calum’s deflated rubber body and giving it a rustle. “You sure you want it?”

“I just thought it’d be funny,” Hunter said. He grabbed Calum, holding him in his hands. Calum felt Hunter fold him over. He was horrified to be bent in half so easily, especially since there was no pain. But the spots where Hunter held him tingled. He liked to be touched, he realized, and didn’t want Hunter to let him go.

“Let’s just get rid of it,” the imposter musclestud suggested.

Calum tried to scream to Hunter that he wasn’t a toy, that it wasn’t him standing there, that his identity had been stolen, but not a single sound came from his inanimate form. As Hunter started to roll Calum into a tube, the deflated bodybuilder yearned to scream but couldn’t make a sound. The feeling of being folded over on himself like that, compressed down and shoved into packaging… it couldn’t be real. It couldn’t be.

Hunter hung Calum, now stuffed into his package, on the hook and walked away. Calum hung there wondering if this were a dream, if he would wake up. As he hung there, he became vaguely aware of soft whispers all around him. The other blow up dolls hanging on the hook behind him were moaning hopelessly. Below him, a dildo shrieked, and Calum realized that every one of these “toys” had once been a customer.

The door’s bells jingled and Calum’s heart leapt. Maybe Hunter had figured out that the other Calum was a fake and was back to save him! But no, it was someone else. Calum yearned to see beyond his packaging, wishing he could hear the conversations more clearly.

His mind raced as a hand yanked his package off the shelf. He bounced with each of the man’s footsteps as they approached the counter. Calum was thankful to be off the rack but realized he was about to be purchased--he wasn’t a sex toy, his mind screamed! He was a person!

“I think you’ll enjoy this,” Chip said, as he plopped Calum’s package into a bag. Calum rustled in the thin plastic.

It seemed like an eternity when Calum found himself sliding out of the bag. His package opened and Calum felt immense relief as he was unrolled. He looked in horror down at his shrunken, flattened rubber body with its painted-on features. This is my body now, he realized with horror.

As breath filled him, one huff at a time, Calum started to feel empowered. The air filling his empty limbs made him feel euphoric. When he was finally plumped out to capacity, he felt a moment of pride--shattered by the shame of realizing what was about to happen with him.

An overweight, balding man in tightie-whiteys looked lovingly at Calum’s rubber body, smearing lube into the hole where Calum’s mouth should be. Through his horror at what he had become, Calum could feel new instincts taking over--he knew he was a thing, he knew what his purpose was, and despite the fact that he knew he was supposed to be a human, a part of him was grateful to be used like the toy he was.