OC Spotlight: Lei // sfw

First of all I want to address the elephant in the room: you may notice some core similarities between Lei and a few other characters, primarily March and Tsaga. This is because Tsaga and Lei both originated as alternate universe versions of March. They quickly evolved into new characters in their own right, but some basic personality traits and story elements remain, though adapted to new concepts and situations.

Second of all, let's go over some pieces of lore that are essential to Lei's story:

1) One of the oldest god pairs are the siblings of night and day -- Daiva and Hel'wusah. Daiva is the goddess of the moon and the ocean; of clarity, truth, navigation, wayfinding, and luck; and of knowing the past and the future as much as the present. Hel'wusah is the blind god of the sun, associated with illusions, deception, madness, mirages, cunning, and trickery.

2) In this underground world, light is more dangerous and terrifying than shadow and darkness. The reasons are many: Hel’wusah lost his mind in the war against the Gatekeeper, as did many of his sun spirits. Some eventually managed to restore their sanity, while others remain plagued by madness. One of the worst illnesses known to this world is the so-called light disease, which eats people up from the inside out, twisting their minds and eventually turning them into living dead. Akhuru's partner Ilan is a rare survivor. Liquid light (of the sun, moon, or star variety) is a valuable resource that's used for illumination and sometimes for magic. However, it's an extremely dangerous substance that usually has lethal consequences if it's weaponised or ingested. Even then, some people take the risk of abusing it as a drug. The sun itself is the Hell that awaits immoral mortals after death, dangerous light monsters roam the desert, and anyone wielding light magic is met with prejudiced superstition.

2) Sometimes, a god may choose a champion among the living. The deity might have a purpose or mission for that particular person; perhaps they embody the values of the god; or maybe the deity has simply grown fond of them. Usually, it's a combination of all three. Some divine champions are made aware of the god's choice and may interact with them, more or less indirectly. Others live their entire lives never having a clue, only to find out in the afterlife that all the little hunches and strange signs that governed their decisions were actually nudges from a god.

4) There once was an elven kingdom, deeply infected with a sense of glory and supremacy. It was ruled by a handful of aristocratic families that each tried to increase their prestige in different ways. An influential politician named Adan sought to marry Zaray, the daughter of an old and wealthy bloodline. Meanwhile, a high priestess of the Gatekeeper cult attempted to gain power from serving the demi-god Nehaneru. Another ancient lineage shamefully forced their cursed son to always wear a mask. Instead of agreeing to marry Adan, Zaray sets her room ablaze and disappears into the desert. Years later she returns, now a witch of embers and the bride of the dragon man Roshan. She sets half the city on fire; the rest of it drowns in the waters called forth by Nehaneru’s lover Wansa, after the demi-god grants them the power to take revenge for a lifetime of being enslaved. And the "cursed" son finally frees himself from the shackles of shame and hunts down the politicians and warlords that had been so consumed by arrogance that nothing short of perfection had been good enough.

Those who don't perish in these calamities scatter across the desert, accepting that the elven kingdom has come to an end and adapting to new ways of life. But a few survivors of the old lineages cling to their dreams of power. Adan is one of them -- you may also remember this villainous man from the Weshau and Iskandar spotlights. He's part of a group of elven supremacists who want to reinstate their kingdom, at any cost.

One of Adan's allies is a sorceress named Mubina, and she has a monstrous plan that involves highly forbidden magic. She spends decades in a hidden laboratory deep beneath the earth, funded by Adan's wealth and aided in her research by a mysterious andheran scientist who is an expert on light. "Project Eclipse" demands much hard work and sacrifice, but she's certain it will be worth it.

One by one, Mubina’s followers capture dozens of spirits, creatures, and people associated with sunlight, locking them in rows of cells. Most of them are sun spirits, ranging from sane and lucid to completely deranged. Some are terrifying light beasts, scratching at their cages with white-hot claws and breathing sun flares. Others are mortal individuals with a talent for light magic, among them a sun knight. The elven mage brings each of them to her operating room, where their souls, minds, and bodies are broken apart into "useful" components. Finally, she has all the pieces she needs, and as she puts them together something new is created.

From the depths of a pool filled with pure sunlight a man emerges, about twenty-five years of age and with eyes that look like eclipsed suns. He is dazed and confused, but capable of talking and moving within minutes. However, he has no memories from before suddenly waking up in the liquid light; no idea who or what or where he is; and no notion of what the world and its inhabitants are like. He is a blank slate, exactly according to Mubina’s design.  Don't worry, she tells him, I'll teach you everything you need to know.

Thus begins a process of indoctrination, brainwashing, and manipulation.  The aim of Project Eclipse is to create a living weapon of mass destruction, capable of dealing with any enemies that stand in the way of resurrecting the elven kingdom. Constructing Lei from dangerous light spirits was only the first step. Now she needs to shape him into an obedient tool fully under her control, and teach him to master his abilities.

Day after day, Mubina feeds him lies about the world; about the past, present, and future; and about himself. For centuries, she tells him, a tyrannical empire has oppressed the peoples of the world outside. In their bloody rise to power the two empresses crushed any opposition, including the peaceful elven kingdom where Mubina was born. Now they claim to be gods, demanding worship and submission from their subjects. Wealth and power is concentrated in the hands of imperial lapdogs, while the vast population suffer in poverty and fear. Aristocrats and generals lead a life of luxury and comfort, safe behind the city walls and caring little for how the common folk are constantly attacked by raiders and monsters. But elven rebels are secretly working to overthrow the tyrants and restore the glory of their country. Now you must help us.

Instead of telling him the truth, the sorceress claims to have used the magic of sunlight to save Lei's life and grant him unique abilities. Just like Mubina and the rebels, he must use his powers to fight for freedom and hope. You will be a warrior without equal, your hands red with the blood of our enemies. Once he's ready she will send him to assassinate powerful officials and officers, demolish imperial seats of power, and destroy important resources. By wreaking havoc he would weaken the infrastructure, manpower, and morale of the empire, paving the way for elven revenge.

Lei's reaction is conflicted, to say the least. The idea of having to kill and demolish fills him with unease, but a small part of his soul seems to revel at the notion of violence and chaos. Sensing his hesitation, Mubina comforts him and says that the death of their foes is a necessary evil. Besides, he could never lead a normal life for as long as the empresses rule. Their followers would hate him for being different, she says, for being a unique "anomaly" and out of fear of his powers. They would not accept him, but she does. There is no place for you in the empire, but after the success of our rightful revolution history will remember you as a hero.

Can you blame him for believing her? He has no memories, no relationships, no frame of reference, and no knowledge or experience of the outside world. Lei doesn't seem to age, and spends the first few decades of his life isolated in the laboratory, getting taught and trained by Mubina. For all that time there's no other people or information available to influence his beliefs -- only Mubina and what she chooses to tell him. At this point he has no reason to question her teachings, no awareness of alternative stories, and no reason to believe anything else. There's nothing to compare her story with or test it against; nothing to contradict what she's saying; and really, no other choice or option. Her world view and her truth is everything he knows.

On top of that, Mubina is the only person that cares about him. She saved his life and gave him a home. Now she makes sure he has a comfortable place to sleep, food, clothes, and anything else you need to lead a decent life. Moreover, she's entrusted him with an important purpose. She seems so warm, kind, and nurturing too, at least at first glance. Lei soon learns how quickly her smile can stop being a smile, and how she won't hesitate to punish undesirable behaviour. On some level he recognises that she’s cruel and selfish, and at times he resents her. But even then, she's the closest thing he's ever had to a mother -- at least as far as he remembers. Despite her demanding expectations and the terrible things she asks him to do, he is thankful for her and cares for her. There's a sense of obligation and duty, too -- with everything she's done for him, the least he can do in return is listen, learn, and do as she commands.

There's only one thing that troubles him. Every now and then he has inexplicable flashes that somehow seem like memories, viewed through both his own eyes and someone else's -- or perhaps many someones. With these glimpses come strange emotions that don’t feel like his own, yet they sit deep in his core. He blinks his eyes and stands in the middle of the vast desert, full of excitement for an impending adventure. Another flash is of a stranger’s smiling face, and it makes his heart flutter. Sometimes he has a vision of a battle, of killing the traders in a caravan and taking their riches, adrenaline pumping through his veins. Yet other times he wears a golden armour and defends the travellers from whatever lurks in the wilds. And sometimes he is the thing that lurks, hungrily sinking his fangs into warm flesh. When he asks Mubina about these visions she seems deeply troubled, telling him they're hallucinations and that the deadly madness she saved him from must still lay dormant in his heart. Thankfully she can help, by magically entering his mind and freeing him from the flashing images.

Mubina knows where these visions are coming from, but she doesn't want him to remember. Instead she implants false memories, induces delusions, and re-wires his mind to strengthen her grip on his soul. In her eyes, Lei is not a person -- he's a tool, a weapon. The unscrupulous sorceress uses various methods to control, shape, and indoctrinate him, ranging from emotional and psychological manipulation to coercion and physical abuse. If she's quick to reward obedience and loyalty she's quicker still to punish him whenever she deems it necessary. She's buried magical nails in his soul that allows her to hurt him without even lifting a finger; she can set his nerves on fire or make his spine feel like it's being stabbed with a thousand knives. Even worse is when she puts him through waking nightmares by filling his mind with horrific scenes or drowning his heart with unbearable anguish. Mubina doesn't need him to think for himself. She needs him to follow orders without hesitation, and she doesn't care if she has to break him down from the inside and out to make him serve her purposes.

To prepare him for his terrible work the elven mage puts Lei through a harsh training regimen. Half of it centers on mastering his shapeshifting and magical powers, which revolve around light in general and sunlight in particular. When he fights his claws and hands can turn white hot with the destructive radiance of the sun, and while liquid light is dangerous and lethal to others Lei heals from touching or ingesting it. He's capable of shaping temporary weapons made from pure light;  breathing light like a dragon would breathe fire; and throwing glowing orbs that explode on impact. Last but not least he can turn into a monstrous creature that resembles a fox (which just so happens to be an animal associated with the sun god).

The other half of his training is martial and physical. Mubina brings in expert warriors to train and spar with him; besides honing his strength, agility, and speed he learns how to use the various weapons he can manifest out of light. Lei is a fast learner, but it goes deeper than simply "being a natural;" it's almost like he already knows how to fight, or as if the training is unlocking memories from lives he hasn't lived -- or has he?

Some of the teachers are elven rebels; others are guards and gladiators in their service. Mubina keeps them returning until Lei can defeat them, gradually pitting him against more and more powerful opponents. She cares little if he’s wounded and hurt in the process -- in fact learning to withstand pain is part of the training. If an enemy were to capture him he must never reveal Mubina’s secrets, even if he’s tortured.

In a test of obedience, the elven mage orders Lei to kill a gladiator he just defeated, as proof that he can do what she needs him to do. When he hesitates she tells him of the many lives that the man has taken in the ring. Why should he deserve pity or mercy? The same will hold true for his future targets -- Mubina promises that the people he will have to kill all deserve to die. Ultimately, he obeys; the gladiator's lifeless body sinks to the floor, blood pooling around Lei's feet. It doesn't make it easier to kill the next time she commands it, but this time Mubina punishes his uncertainty with a jolt of pain. After that he hesitates less and less.

Throughout all of this, Lei still has no concept of his own identity or sense of self. He doesn't know who he is, what he wants, or how to find out. Constant inner conflict leads to frustration and confusion, manifesting in temper issues and poor impulse control. It's not a healthy way to process emotions, but Mubina doesn't mind. On the contrary -- she wants him to be destructive and thus allows him few other ways to have and express feelings other than anger and violence. Between the strict training and fear of punishment, he has little opportunity to learn to understand himself, or become anything beyond what Mubina wants him to be. Focus on your purpose, she tells him, don't get distracted by meaningless things.

The first time he leaves the laboratory is when Mubina takes him to see the ruins of the elven kingdom. She tells him of its glory -- the wisdom, harmony, peace, and order that has since been replaced by cruelty, corruption, and oppression. Lei must never allow the lies that the empire is built on to lead him astray from his work. It's bloody and terrible, true, but someone has to do it. Make them fear your light.

After giving him some time to get used to the outside world, Mubina declares that he's ready. She starts sending him on missions, gradually escalating the scope and difficulty. It begins with assassinating imperial officials and military officers in nearby villages and outposts. At that point he comes and goes mostly without a trace, leaving only a dead body as proof of his existence. Next she has him attack caravans and patrols in his massive fox form, and now people begin to whisper about a terrible light monster. The rumour gains more traction when Mubina orders him to destroy military barracks, trading posts, mansions of the rich and wealthy, local government buildings, and important oases on routes through the desert -- not to mention killing higher profile targets.

With every successful job, the sorceress entrusts him with harder tasks, and sends him further and further away from the secret laboratory. But she always demands that he comes back immediately, without allowing anything to distract or delay him.

Still, many missions require reconnaissance and preparation, so Lei finally gets to experience the world outside the laboratory. In the beginning, he never questions Mubina's truth. Why would he? He wears a mask as he walks among the people whose lives he's been sent to destroy, thinking he'll find proof of the empire's cruelty around every corner. But the more he starts to look, the more it seems like what he's seeing doesn't match up with what he's been taught. Every now and then he experiences events or meets people that pokes small holes in Mubina's story. Most confusing of all is when he's treated kindly. Lei has little in the way of social skills (it's not like he was ever given the opportunity to develop any) but most people simply assume he's some kind of spirit who's not so used to mortal society. If there could be no place for someone like him in the empire, how was it so easy for strangers to accept his presence, to greet him with smiles and friendly conversation?

Eventually he asks Mubina about it, but regrets it as soon as her smile turns to ice. Next second he's sent to his knees from intense pain, like a blade slicing his spinal cord in half. How dare he question her teachions? Is his mind too dull to cut through the enemy's web of lies? Of course you can't see the true magnitude of the empire's malice, she explains; it deviously hides it behind a facade of peace and calm. I thought you'd be clever enough to realise as much.

Soon he discovers that Mubina's spies keep an eye on him wherever he goes. She always seems to know what he's doing and if he ever appears to stray from his tasks, he learns to expect punishment. Perhaps he needs another dozen years of training in the laboratory, before she can trust him with such important work? Lei, unwilling to lose his newfound mobility, makes sure to stay in line. 

Once Mubina deems him sufficiently obedient she rewards him with more freedom -- although freedom is a poor choice of words for simply lengthening the leash. By way of more and more crucial missions he gets closer and closer to the imperial capital. His brand of light magic packs a terrifying amount of destructive power, allowing him to single-handedly destroy roads, fields, irrigation systems, wells, government buildings, and military fortifications. But destroying stone and mudbrick and clay is one thing; taking lives is another. Lei stains his hands with the blood of high-ranking military officers, influential politicians, powerful and wealthy aristocrats, and other important kegs loyal to the imperial machinery. It never feels good, but he reminds himself that cruel people sometimes have to die for a good cause. At this point the infamous light monster with the eclipse motif has been given the moniker 'the Dark Sun,' usually whispered in fear. Mubina always said history will remember him as a hero -- so why does he sometimes feel more like a villain?

The sorceress orders him to strike the heart of the empire before they've had too much time to prepare for his arrival. At long last he reaches the capital, sneaking past the heightened security and beginning a few long days of horror that the city won't soon forget.

One after the other he claims the lives of a general, a senator, a noblewoman, a royal advisor, a palatial mage, a captain of the sun knights, an agent of the secret service, and several other powerful people from the upper echelon of imperial society. He targets the buildings of the government, the army, different martial orders, and the police, until several areas of the city are covered in ashes and smoke.

The sun knights are experts at fighting light monsters, with weapons coated in liquid light -- but when they engage Lei in combat they discover that their blades heal rather than harm him. Instead his greatest opponents are the members of the palatial shadow guards. These umbral warriors work in well-coordinated groups to outmaneuver Lei, thwarting several of his attacks on people and places and facing him in numerous fights. A message arrives from Mubina, telling him to assassinate the key targets before the shadow guards manage to capture or kill him.

The two empresses are demi-gods, and not even the sorceress is foolish enough to order him to attack them; instead his main task is to kill the members of the imperial triad. One of them is Sekai Zuri, the leader of imperial intelligence. However, nobody can find Sekai Zuri if Sekai Zuri does not want to be found, so Lei soon moves on to Kayin -- the Eye of Saoban. He's the foremost imperial mage, gifted with the clear sight of Daiva and capable of seeing what others can't, both past, present, and future.

Before approaching, Lei makes sure that the dead man who often protects Kayin is nowhere to be seen. He sneaks into the sorcerer’s apartment and slits the throat of the figure he finds meditating in front of an indoor shrine -- only to realise it's an illusion. Kayin's voice comes to him from an undeterminable direction, with Lei catching glimpses of his face in the mirrors of the room. Rather than calling the guards or threatening his imminent arrest, Kayin can see the seeds of doubt in Lei's heart and tells him that he must learn to tell truth from lie, illusion from reality. The mage is cryptic as ever and Lei hardly understands everything he's saying, but he seems to know that Lei questions whether or not what he's doing is actually right. Is Mubina really telling you the truth? Not even Daiva can cure Hel'wusah's madness, but help will come to lift the veil of illusion from Lei's eyes -- and with time he might walk a different path, if he so chooses. At the sound of steps in the outside corridor Lei has to leave the scene, but the unexpected conversation leaves him questioning everything he's ever been told, now more than ever.

Still, his next target is Imran, the Sword of Khunsu. He's the commander of the imperial army, and proves a formidable adversary. To make matters worse Imran's courtesan Iteru is a secret service agent in disguise, tasked with ensuring the general's survival. Lei faces both of them in a brutal fight that leaves all three injured, but Lei worst of all. He has to flee the capital without managing to kill any member of the triad, and barely makes it back to the laboratory alive.

Drinking liquid sunlight saves his life, but Mubina gives him little time to recover before making her displeasure known.

As soon as he's fully healed up, the sorceress has a new plan for getting rid of the triad. First of all they will lure Imran out of the city by attacking a major target the general can't ignore -- Mubina commands Lei to destroy Ubdyi's Rest. This town is a major religious site in the middle of the desert, a significant meeting point for the nomadic clans, and a hub of commerce. Reducing Ubdyi's Rest to ashes might even rekindle the war between the city and the nomads that the union of the empresses had once put an end to.

Like so many times before Lei heads out to examine the temple town and devise a plan of attack, but as he walks down its streets he notices something strange. There's no imperial officials in Ubdyi's Rest, no powerful politicians, no influential aristocrats, no soldiers or barracks, and no sentinels. Instead the town is ruled by the high priest, and the martially skilled clerics of Ubdyi keep the peace. It’s populated by pilgrims, merchants, artisans, and ... normal people. Innocent people. As he watches the inhabitants of Ubdyi's Rest go about their peaceful lives, Kayin's words echo through his mind.

Distracted by all these thoughts, he accidentally bumps into a faun and his daughter; the faun is a baker named Latif who kindly offers him some sweet treats, fresh out of the oven. Soon after Latif's husband Tsaga returns from his priestly duties at the temple, and the sight gives Lei pause. Mubina had always told him that there would never be a place in the empire for an anomaly like himself -- but if a broken clayborn like Tsaga can lead a happy life in a town like this, why couldn't Lei?

The elven sorceress is surprised to see him return to the laboratory much sooner than expected. Had Ubdyi's Rest fallen so easily? Cold fury soon takes the place of her suspicions, as Lei reveals that he came back without attacking the temple town. At last he confronts Mubina and demands to know why he has to destroy Ubdyi’s Rest. There can't possibly be any enemies of the elven kingdom in a town populated by regular people, with few imperial servants to be seen. She had promised that she'd never ask him to kill someone who doesn't deserve it, "so tell me why all those people deserve death."

Instead of explaining anything, Mubina lashes out worse than ever before. Unbearable pain emanates from the nails she has long since lodged in his mind, to the point where Lei blacks out. As he comes to, she tells him to follow orders and destroy Ubdyi's Rest -- or die at her hands.

Reeling from agony, Lei asks her forgiveness and makes a promise to obey. But as soon as he's far enough from the laboratory he turns on Mubina's spies, kills them, and goes on the run from her. He doesn't know what’s true anymore, but one thing is certain -- he refuses to destroy a town full of innocents. It can't be worth it, even if the empire is as horrible as the sorceress has always led him to believe.

Having abandoned her service, though, Lei has nothing. Without the secret laboratory there's no safe haven to return to, and without Mubina he has no ally. He aimlessly heads into the desert and has no trouble surviving, since he can hunt for food and sniff his way to water -- but where is he supposed to go? By now he's wanted throughout the entire empire, and it's only a question of time before the vindictive mage comes after him too.

After the events in the capital, a team has formed to take Lei down once and for all. The key players are Sekai Zuri, who gathers intel on where to find him; a regiment of shadow guards spearheaded by the two most skilled warriors among them, Jing and Faiz; and Kazuo, an experienced inquisitor armed with tools that can incapacitate spirits and monsters. Through their collective efforts they manage to track down the infamous Dark Sun, overwhelm him in a fight, and clasp him in magical shackles that make it impossible for him to shapeshift or use his powers.

Once they've brought their prisoner back to the capital, the trial of the century takes place. Imperial officials interrogate him and soon realise that Lei was following someone else's orders rather than working on his own accord. A few of the more astute observers even think that he seems indoctrinated rather than acting out of personal conviction. But even now, racked by doubt and guilt, Lei refuses to say anything about Mubina. In fact he makes no attempt at explaining or defending his actions, because how could there possibly be a good enough excuse for what he's done? Surely he will be sentenced to death, and he can't help but feel that he deserves it.

That's when Ezra steps in. This andheran is a highly respected scientist who has devoted his life to studying the light disease, with the ultimate goal of finding a cure for the incurable. He explains that since Lei is a truly unique light monster, conducting research on him might hold the key to unlocking new information about the disease. Executing him would be a terrible waste -- instead, Ezra suggests that they put him in a high security prison where one might be able to conduct experiments and studies on the criminal. After a heated debate, it is decided to heed the expert's advice.

Unbeknownst to anyone, Lei included, Ezra is the very same scientist that worked with Mubina on "Project Eclipse" so many years prior. He helped the sorceress create Lei out of light spirits and monsters, but she would never allow any experimentation -- not out of love for Lei, but to avoid potentially damaging the living weapon she was so painstakingly sharpening. She can’t stop it now, though, and Ezra is pleased to seize the opportunity.

Before long Lei finds himself in the darkest, deepest cell of an isolated prison, rendered inescapable in every magical and mundane way you could think of. The shackles remain around his wrists, ankles, and neck, cancelling out his powers; the cell is surrounded by thick stone walls and several layers of iron bars; barriers have been put up to keep magical outbursts both in and out; there's no liquid light anywhere near the building; and dozens of highly skilled warriors guard it day and night.

Despite regular attempts to draw information out of him he says nothing, but Lei soon learns that Ezra's visits are far worse than any interrogation. He usually ends up strapped to an operation table, too sedated to remember anything but waking up with an aching new scar. Every now and then, however, he's kept conscious through the surgical procedure, because Ezra intends to study how the light of an entity like him behaves when awake. Even the prison warden, who deeply loathes Lei for his crimes, can barely stomach to watch. Charismatic and eloquent as ever, Ezra explains that Lei's suffering is a highly regrettable yet necessary evil; he would not put him through such horrors, were it not for the possibility of making significant scientific breakthroughs. Think of the countless lives that might be saved if new ways to treat the light disease could be devised -- perhaps even a vaccine or cure.

Lei spends years locked in that cell, and it's even lonelier than in the laboratory. Time and reality becomes blurry concepts and he starts hearing and seeing things that aren't there. More than ever before images of other lives flash before his mind, to the point where it’s occasionally hard to know where he himself ends and the visions begin.

Thankfully Fate has unexpected developments in store for him and a couple of unlikely allies are finally on their way.

First of all, a fox entity named Harun shows up in his cell, even though there's magical barriers to keep spirits out. Lei thinks he's merely another mirage, but the mischievous sun spirit proves he's real through a series of pranks. It's not long before Lei loses his temper but Harun cheekily eludes every attack, until the convict can only ask what the hell he wants of him?!

The fox casually reveals that Lei is the sun god's chosen champion.

As the infamous Dark Sun sits speechless, Harun begins to formulate an elaborate plan. Sly as ever he neglects to tell Lei that Hel’wusah wants the criminal broken out of prison -- but hey, he’ll discover sooner or later, right?

Meanwhile, a Daivan priest named Khayri starts receiving dream messages from the goddess. Such prophetic experiences have defined his entire life, from the moment his parents left their little child in a Daivan temple, where he might learn to use and interpret the strange abilities he’d been born with. Now he wakes to the knowledge that there's someone he needs to find, but he must do so on his own. In order to locate this mysterious person he takes to the sleeping world, methodically finding his way; Lei, in his dark cell, starts having strangely peaceful dreams.

A while after, Khayri shows up at the prison's doorstep. His unexpected arrival confuses the guards, but they decide to let him in. Perhaps a Daivan priest, famed for their ability to see clearly, will be able to uncover the truth about the enigmatic criminal. Khayri plays along, despite having no intention of magically interrogating the prisoner on the empire's behalf. He's there because Daiva sent him, to serve a purpose he has yet to uncover.

In other words Lei has barely gotten over Harun's mischief before another stranger appears outside the bars of his cage. It doesn't help that Khayri suddenly sinks to the floor, asleep; next second Lei himself seems to blink awake, and now the priest is standing right before him. Soon enough he realises that they're both dreaming, and thus begins a long string of unusual meetings.

In all honestly, they both make horrible first impressions on each other. Lei thinks Khayri is an arrogant, cryptic, and snooty piece of shit who knows way more than he should. From Khayri's perspective Lei seems little more than a rude, aggressive, violent, and uncooperative brute. Even then the priest has no intention of letting the convict’s charming personality deter him. Daiva must have given him this task for a reason, and as he works to understand it he takes no shit and tolerates no nonsense.

Lei slowly comes to understand that the weird stranger isn’t technically working for the empire, and even though they low key hate one another it’s the first time someone treats him like an equal. No matter his crude manners he’s starved for social interaction, especially since he's never before spent such a length of time with someone, aside from the sorceress. After turning his back on Mubina he was left with even less of an identity than when she forced him to serve her purposes, but even just talking to Khayri makes him feel more like a person.

Moreover, the priest seems less interested in learning who he served and more curious about him. When Lei realises that Khayri has them meet in dreams to keep the guards from overhearing, he starts to cautiously trust the Daivan priest and tells him things he's never told anyone before. But there’s still so much he doesn’t know about himself. Instead of having the answer to a question but refusing to reveal it, Lei finds himself willing to talk but not knowing the answer. Piece by piece, Khayri begins to see the web of lies and abuse that has shaped Lei's entire existence. Much of his anger and bitterness stems from the immense confusion that stains his soul, and Khayri offers to help him disentangle this world of deceit. I can help you tell lie from truth, illusion from reality.

Lei initially scoffs at the idea, but upon asking why he should trust Khayri the priest simply responds "Yes, why should you?" Unlike Mubina, Khayri makes no attempt at convincing or influencing him; he leaves it completely up to Lei to decide on his own. The possibility of finding out who he is and where he came from is ultimately impossible to resist, and Lei ends up accepting the offer. What's the worst that could happen? Besides, there's something magnetic about Khayri, making Lei look forward to his visits and secretly hating it when he has to leave.

They meet in his dreams again, and the priest starts unravelling everything that's hidden away in his subconscious. First of all he has to find the magical nails Mubina drove into Lei's mind, re-wiring it according to her wishes. With Lei's permission Khayri removes these pins, and in doing so the prisoner has a flood of incoherent visions. Khayri realises that these flashing images were never hallucinations or falsehoods, like Mubina would have him believe; they are memories from the lives of the spirits, mortals, and monsters Mubina broke apart to create Lei. Khayri finds that rather than having one soul, Lei has several -- or rather, perhaps, a patchwork soul.

Everything is possible in the land of dreams, so Khayri is capable of calling forth each of these entities to where Lei can meet and talk to them. One after the other they tell and show him who they used to be, what their lives were like, and what Mubina did to them. Lei finally learns of his origins -- how dozens of lives were sacrificed, their minds and bodies destroyed and reused in cruel, forbidden magic. Each of his abilities can be traced back to one or several of the entities that make up his soul, as can many of his ‘natural’ skills and much of his instinctive knowledge. Even his inner conflict makes a lot of sense given the wide range of personalities represented by them -- some were good-hearted and just; others were bloodthirsty and violent; most were somewhere in-between. No wonder he would simultaneously feel horrible about killing and revel at the scent of blood. Most importantly, perhaps, Lei gets to meet a mirror version of himself. No matter how he was created and who those people once were, now he is Lei, and nobody else can figure out who he wants to be.

With Khayri’s help Lei begins to accept the extent of Mubina’s lies. Everything he thought he knew, everything he once believed in, crumbles around him. Little by little, they uncover all the ways that the sorceress messed with his mind, from inducing hallucinations and implanting false memories to manipulating his emotions and making him believe a false version of world history. Mubina never taught him to read, but Khayri does, and even sneaks a few books past the guards. With time he's able to read the works of various historians, and learns the truth. Rather than rising out of unprecedented bloodshed, the empire is the result of peace being brokered between the city and the nomadic clans. The elven kingdom, on the other hand, was built on the backs of enslaved people. Mubina and her brethren were never rebels fighting for a just cause -- they are elven supremacists claiming it’s their ‘birthright’ to rule all others. By serving them Lei was never the hero, and always the villain.

Each dream conversation comes with awful new realisations, but it helps to wake to Khayri's more and more familiar face. After lifting the veil of illusion from his eyes, how could Lei not trust the priest? And there’s something else, too, something like the warmth he’d feel when seeing the smiling face in his visions. Now he knows that the person in that particular memory had been the spouse of one of his past selves, and remembering that long lost love only makes him more aware of his budding feelings for Khayri.

Do note that Lei has zero experience of anything romantic or sexual (it's not like he was ever given the opportunity) and thus has no idea what to do with the heat in his chest. Whenever the priest gets close Lei gets flustered and starts losing his words, and gods forbid that Khayri ever touches him, because it makes Lei freeze up like a deer in headlights. There's no way he can hide these feelings from the very person who visits his mind while he dreams. But the priest seems more focused on the task at hand, and Lei tries not to think too much about it.

Everything changes the day that Ezra comes to perform another experiment on Lei. It entails a surgical procedure best performed while the subject is awake and aware, and witnessing this horrible scene is the final nail in the coffin for Khayri. For some mysterious reason Lei falls unconscious during the experiment, saving him from the pain. In that moment Khayri decides to take matters into his own hands rather than wait for further signs from Daiva. By now he knows Lei better than anyone else; the Dark Sun may have committed plenty of deplorable crimes, but he does not deserve a life like this.

Khayri silently vows to help him escape, and upon meeting Harun realises that they have the same goal. Out of the unlikely trio, Lei is the most pessimistic about their prospects. Even if they manage to break him out of jail, he’d be on the run for the rest of his life and everyone would hate him for what he’s done. Most likely he’d just get caught again, and perhaps this time the empire wouldn’t settle for simply locking him up. But Harun insists that if they can prove that Lei is Hel’wusah’s chosen champion, he will gain immunity from the law. Not even the empresses would dare interfere with the will of a god.

By now the fox spirit has nearly finished developing an elaborate and ingenious plan. Khayri spoils all of Harun's fun by proposing a much simpler solution: he can make all of the guards fall asleep long enough to let them escape. There will still be a daunting series of mundane and magical gates to unlock along the way, but Harun takes care of that little detail by tricking an old acquaintance -- the inquisitor Kazuo.

On the day of their escape, the sun spirit expertly deceives Kazuo into giving him access to the keys, and Khayri’s magic puts all the sentries in a deep slumber. The priest himself needs to be asleep for the duration of the spell, so Lei has to carry him; despite crushing harder than ever on the sleeping beauty in his arms, Lei and his compatriots manage to flee the prison and head into the desert.

So far so good, but they don't get that far before a small army of sentinels make chase. Kazuo relentlessly leads the manhunt, hounding the fugitive to exhaustion. Harun says they can’t rest before they reach the largest sun sanctuary in the empire -- there, if anywhere, they could hope for a sign from Hel’wusah to prove Lei's status.

Kazuo is more or less nipping at their heels as Lei elbows his way past a row of confused priests and into the temple. The moment he steps in front of the massive statue of Hel'wusah, he's bathed in an orb of light as bright as the sun. The inquisitor and sentinels freeze on the threshold, watching in awe as the gleaming copper statue opens its unseeing eyes. Lei is lifted into the air, and for a brief second he could have sworn that the statue winked at him. With a snap of metal the shackles around his neck and wrists break apart, replaced instead by the sun god's sigil, glowing on his skin. As his feet touch the ground again the statue has closed its eyes, but every priest in the great hall is kneeling around him.

If it was up to Kazuo, he would still arrest all three of them -- Lei for all his crimes, the Daivan priest for helping the convict escape, and Harun for being ever a thorn in his side. But the high priest is certain -- for some inexplicable reason Hel’wusah has chosen a monstrous criminal as his champion. Moreover, fox spirits belong to the sun god’s realm, and the moon goddess is Hel’wusah’s sister. If Harun is doing the god’s work, and if Daiva had sent her priest to aid her brother, how can they possibly oppose the will of the gods Divine champions are above and beyond mortal law, but Kazuo insists that they can’t just forgive and forget his past sins. It is decided that Lei will be brought before the highest judgement available to the mortal realm: the empresses themselves.

Throughout all of this, Lei makes no more attempts at escaping or changing his fate. It’s still hard to believe that the whole ‘champion thing’ might be real, and he doesn’t know what to feel. But Khayri is determined to remain at his side through thick and thin, and Lei is sick of running. If the empresses deem him deserving of death, he won’t fight it -- but if they decide to give him a second chance, he won’t waste it.

The whole capital holds its breath as the Dark Sun returns. This time he’s escorted by sentinels and priests, but for some reason the Eye of Saoban welcomes him back like an old acquaintance.

Meeting the semi-divine rulers of the empire is a terrifying experience. They’re each ten foot tall, the one a dragon and the other a barn owl, sitting on massive thrones of silver and gold. Khunsu represents Hayat, god of life and war; Saoban embodies Wufat, god of death and peace. Lei can only fall to his knees: Saoban says she has long awaited his arrival, and Khunsu knows the god's sigil on his throat to be true. Back during his first trial, Lei had barely said a word. Now, in front of the empresses and the triad, Khayri helps him explain everything they've uncovered about his past and about Mubina. Not that Lei tries to avoid responsibility for his actions; he knows that he's done so many unforgiveable things, and Saoban can see that his heart is full of guilt and regret.

Khunsu wonders if he can truly be allowed to live, but Saoban tells her wife they must respect the sun god’s choice. Lei can keep his life, on the condition that he spends the rest of it serving Hel’wusah and the empire. Whatever the god has in store for him, Lei must follow his instructions; whenever the empire and its people call for his help, he must respond.

Saying that Lei has mixed feelings is an understatement. Part of him doesn't want to be a divine champion, and both Khayri and Harun will occasionally have to wrangle him into accepting his new role. He's still the same rude, crude, and socially inept idiot as always, who regularly acts like he wouldn't do any of this shit if he wasn’t being forced. But deep down he's grateful, and takes his duties far more seriously than he lets off.

Slowly but steadily he grows to accept the part, not for the sake of keeping his life or selfishly gaining immunity from the law, but out of hope for redemption. No amount of penance can bring back the people he has killed or undo the suffering he's caused -- but neither will getting executed. Perhaps he can never truly atone, but he can damn well try. He's gotten a second chance at life, and a first chance at being his own person. Now he resolves to make sure that this person is someone who can be proud of their choices and who knows their own truth.

Of course, his new status does not equal universal acceptance. Even as the news of Hel'wusah's chosen champion spreads across the empire, the rumours about 'the Dark Sun’ persist and people won’t soon forget the damage he's done. You could argue that when someone is so severely used and manipulated it’s hard to blame them for not knowing any better -- but on the other hand, perhaps he should have known instinctively, or realised sooner that he needed to stand up to Mubina.

In either case, Lei knows that the only way he can gain anybody's trust is to earn it, by working hard and helping people more than he's harmed them. Only by protecting instead of attacking and rebuilding instead of destroying can he prove himself worthy of having a place in the world. Every now and then he manages redemption on a deeply personal level, by helping individuals who had been directly affected by his past crimes. Other times there's no forgiveness to be had, and he knows he has no right to expect or ask for it. Instead he prays to Mezfirah -- the god of mercy.

Remorse and shame are not the only inner demons that Lei struggles with. It’s challenging to try to live in a society that’s nothing like he was told, and figuring out who he wants to be is not a simple path to walk. He still has much to unlearn and re-learn about the world, its inhabitants, and himself. How can he trust that anything is true and how can he choose what’s right? Moreover, even though he’s learning to distinguish between his past selves and Lei, the conflicted nature of his patchwork soul sometimes gives him trouble. Certain parts of it once belonged to cold-hearted people or predatory monsters, and Lei regularly has to battle violent tendencies that border on compulsions. I must be better than that. Champion or not, he can’t do anything about his past and might never overcome the guilt -- but his future is in his hands now. Lei still has a long way to go, but he truly puts in a lot of effort towards being a good person.

Thankfully Khayri is still with him, helping him find his way through both the confusing waking world and the labyrinth of his subconscious. Even as they dream, the pair remains at each other’s sides. The priest develops a fondness for using Lei’s fluffy tail as a pillow, and Lei can’t get enough of watching him sleep.

The more time he spends with Khayri, the more he's able to see clearly. Deceit, madness, and hallucinations had defined his existence for longer than anyone should have to endure, but now he’s starting to know who he is and what he believes in. The priest says that maybe Hel’wusah chose Lei because he embodies the god’s hope to one day regain his sanity.

Be that as it may, Lei finally builds up the courage to kiss Khayri -- who hardly seems surprised. Took you long enough, hm?

Loving Khayri gives Lei something to be certain about; it’s an anchor when he feels unmoored and a safe harbour to return to when the waters get rough. While being Hel’wusah’s champion gave him a purpose, loving Khayri gives him someone to care about, deeper than ever before. If the two of them had rarely strayed far from each other before, they’re virtually inseparable now.

Hel'wusah is a very laid-back master, who expects his followers to think for themselves and trust their own judgement rather than constantly ask for his guidance. Sometimes Harun relays messages from the tricksy deity, and sometimes he gets orders from the empresses, but more often than not Lei has a lot of freedom to go where he thinks he's needed most.

In following Lei's gut, vague divine instructions, imperial commands, and Khayri's prophetic dreams, they end up travelling all over the desert. They aid and cooperate with a wide variety of people, ranging from nomadic clans, ancient spirits, and knightly orders to imperial officials, temple settlements, and even the criminal organisation known as the scoundrels. For example, the pair plays a part in undoing the harm done by Hymns, who engineers an outbreak of the light disease in the scoundrel hideout. Kazuo eventually accepts that Lei is not his enemy, and ends up working together with them on a few missions. The priest and champion assist in the final fight against the Galtais, and join Ilan and Akhuru against a soul-crushing foe. When Muna attempts to conquer the capital, Lei fights to defend its freedom -- he's had enough of supremacists, whether elven or rhaajim.

Muna's defeat ends with the appointment of Iskandar as the new sun knight commander, but it's through a conversation with his partner Renza that Lei learns of Mubina's fate. When Lei had led an imperial force to Mubina's laboratory, they had found it long since abandoned. She hade taken refuge with Adan, where she had helped him take control of Iskandar's mind after Adan lured him and Renza into a trap. By killing her, Renza had broken the spell and together they had put an end to Adan. Learning that she's dead leaves Lei uncertain of what he's supposed to feel. Of course he hates her, for what she did to him and for what she made him do to others -- but at the same time, she was the only mother he ever had. In a sense it's testament to Lei's good soul that the news of her death makes him feel a bit melancholic.

At least it provides some kind of closure. On that note, Lei decides to seek out some of the people he once knew and cherished, before he was him. By heeding the longing of the souls that share his heart, he finds his way to those who were left behind. Part of him dreads meeting them again, and having to tell them what Mubina did to their lost loved ones -- but thanks to Khayri, he is able to offer them closure, too.

One such person is the now grown-up child of a sun knight who disappeared on a mission. Another is a light spirit whose sibling went missing in the dunes. A third is the companion of an artisan who could weave light like thread. In each case, Khayri helps explain that if they're willing to share a dream with Lei, they can reunite with their lost loved one, if only for a while. As they fall asleep they find themselves in a serene landscape, but Lei's form is replaced by that of their father, their sister, their friend. Lei can't live his life as either of them, and it's difficult for Khayri to call forth the relevant soul for an extended period of time. But it's a precious chance to talk to them, one last time, and say goodbye.

One day he finally finds the smiling person of the vision that taught him what love feels like. They're older now, but their eyes and their smile are almost the same -- only more sad. To their amazement, Lei asks if they were once betrothed to a woman who vanished without a trace.

"How on earth did you know?"

"... would you like to meet her again?"

-----

lays down face first, full of feelings. lei is an angy lad and yet he is So Very Soft. if you have any questions about him, just comment below!

also, it felt so cool to write a spotlight that ties in with so many of the stories i’ve already told! you don’t necessarily need to read all the spotlights linked throughout this text, but it sure will give you a fuller picture of these characters and the world they live in.

// art + lei © me; khayri + harun © kubi.