Chapter 95

"I'm sure it would."

"But you're still not going to do it, huh?" Harry sighed. "Let me guess, justice comes first? Well, the real world doesn't work like that. I quite frankly don't even think justice exists, and, more importantly, justice won't save you from a bullet or a Killing Curse, or a piano falling out of a window." He raised his wand and pulled a glowing gemstone from his pocket, pressing the two together. "It also won't save you from the mind-control spell I developed using the help of an Infinity Stone. Covetus Imperius."

The clear spell hit Fury before he could react and he fell to the floor. For a few seconds, he spasmed madly, bleeding from his nose.

"It still needs a bit of modification, as you might be able to tell. Fortunately, it still functions perfectly! That is to say, it is an Imperius Curse which is nearly impossible to detect, whether by wizards, or your closest friends—not that you have any." Harry grinned. "Say goodbye to free will!"

"Goodbye, free will," Fury said.

"Excellent," Harry cackled. "I'm such an evil genius. Bye, for now. I have to go and return some video tapes—your CCTV tapes, that is, and when I say return, I mean burn."

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"Marco, my friend!"

Marco only barely flinched as Harry slid from the shadows and clapped him on the shoulder. He sighed. "Do I even want to know how you got in? And the reason you can never just use the door?"

Harry smiled. "How do you know I didn't use the door?"

"I believe you once told me that doors are for the weak."

"Then you already know why I didn't use the door!" Harry matched Marco's pace, his footsteps silent against the mansion's carpeted floor. "Anyway, I'm here for a reason."

Marco glanced him up and down. "I guessed that from the blood splatters."

"That's not the reason. I was just doing you a favour. And it makes me look cool and intimidating."

"A favour?"

"Yes, I just killed the Malacetti family's heir."

Marco paused. "What?"

"I just killed the Malacetti family's heir. I thought you'd be pleased, what with all of your mobster rivalry."

"But why did you kill him?"

"Well, it's a long story." Harry paused. "It's not actually that long, to be honest. I was looking for a book in their library—"

"You broke into their heavily guarded mansion to look for a single book in their library?"

"Are you honestly surprised? That sounds like exactly the kind of thing I would do. Except it would be more humorous. But it wasn't. Largely because most people don't find it funny when I kill people. Anyway, I was looking for a book—a one of a kind book—and Mario Malacetti wanders in. You can probably guess what happened next."

"You killed him and burnt the house down, wiping out the rest of the Malcetti family in the process?"

Harry frowned at him. "No, of course not. If I killed all of them, you'd have no one to compete against and might get bored. That's what happened to me, and everyone's quite lucky I haven't begun a mago-nuclear apocalypse yet. I am, however, thinking of starting a new religion, to find myself."

"The others aren't fun enough for you, I suppose?"

"No, whilst I'm a big fan of the smitings, and so on, most religions have gotten ever so dull since they stopped practising the fun bits."

"Do I want to know what the fun bits were?"

"Honour killings, crusades, witch burnings, persecuting people of other religions—you know, the fun stuff," Harry said. "Anyway, as I was saying before I went off on a tangent, I was looking for a book."

"What kind of book?" came a female voice from the other side of the room.

"Believe it or not, Maria, I was about to elaborate on that, before you so rudely interrupted," Harry said, and then lapsed into silence.

Maria blinked. "I thought you said you were going to elaborate."

"I was going to but I get obnoxious when I'm offended."

Marco rolled his eyes. "You're always obnoxious."

"Only when I'm around you. Your mere presence offends me, you filthy criminal."

"Your disapproval cuts me to the very bone. I will cry myself to sleep tonight."

"First of all, you're nowhere near as funny or good at sarcasm as me. Second of all, you probably do that whenever I'm not there to hold you close." Harry turned his gaze to Maria as she laughed. "You laugh to hide your pain. I know your heart aches for me, mainly because everyone who has ever met me's heart aches for me. I'm beginning to think I'm some kind of male Veela. Or a sex vampire. Or a sex alien." He frowned. "Oddly enough, that brings me back to what I was talking about."

Marco arched an eyebrow. "You were searching for a book about sex vampires in the Malacetti family's library?"

"No, I was searching for books about magical creatures in the library, and sex vampires are magical creatures."

"I'm not sure that sex vampires exist."

"That's what they want you to think," Harry said, tapping his temple. "A while ago, I came upon a rumour surrounding the origins of Parseltongue—you know, speaking to snakes."

"We're not complete idiots."

"Sorry, assuming that everyone else is retarded makes me feel better about myself. Anyway, as far as most know, Salazar Slytherin was the origin of the language. These rumours indicate otherwise. That Salazar inherited his ability." Harry paused dramatically.

Marco sighed. "Do I need to ask who he inherited it from?"

"Yes."

"Who did he inherit it from?"

"Dragons."

Maria gaped. "Dragons?"

"Dragons."

"But how?"

"Dragons."

"Is that all you're going to say?"

"Dragons," Harry said. "Dragons and volcanoes."

"How do volcanoes relate to this in any way?"

"The furthest back I could trace Slytherin's line is to a dragon and Vesuvius."

"When you say Vesuvius—"