0029 - Back On His Bensington
Added 2023-11-17 18:00:07 +0000 UTCIn this strip we check back in with Bensington Butters, whom careful readers will recall is actually a man named Jimmie "Darnell" Hockawock, from Flokes County, Florida. Along with Ray and AKKOLADE, he is a "Brother in the Syndicate," a term for the members of a halfhearted group of musicians who do not like one another all that much, and meet at odd intervals in a Best Western conference room.
Spoiler alert ahead! Do not read the next paragraph before the comic, as it will spoil the punchline.
Seriously, spoiler alert ahead! Do not read the next paragraph before the comic, as it will spoil the punchline.
"Sabbath titties" are mammary glands which do not produce milk after the birth of young; the reference is to a Jewish ban on doing work from Friday evening to Saturday evening. It is not a reference to the musical act Black Sabbath, or to 18th century French literalist Jacques Sabbattittie. "Sabbath titties" is in-universe slang; please do not go around using it and expecting to make great social inroads. (I felt obligated to place this definition here because ending a strip with a piece of virtually unknown and not-entirely-intuitable slang prevents the sensation of closure which is a critical hallmark of all the best fiction.)
Comments
Do as thou wilt shall be the whole of the law
Scott Chapman
2024-02-24 01:36:34 +0000 UTCSabbath Titties: L'esprit de l'escalier is the name of Ray's next jam
John Hart
2023-11-18 15:54:58 +0000 UTCTheft is a sin, so he's okay with it. He'll get his royalties one way or another
Sedric And Charlie
2023-11-18 08:24:26 +0000 UTCWasn't Ray enabled to write "Ass In Your Pants" by selling his soul to the devil? I wonder how Satan feels about unlicensed sampling.
Oppido
2023-11-18 05:30:18 +0000 UTCI thought that Bensington was getting whipped cream licked off his stomach by women who ain't bought an album since Rumours?
Andrew Gillies
2023-11-18 02:24:20 +0000 UTCHockawock’s failure is so large and undeniable that mere ordinary, daily-type sass isn’t enough. Ray is simply staggered by the measure of Bensington’s failure and so forgets to bring the sass required for the occasion, and that he came up with Sabbath titties but didn’t use it is evidence of the gravity of the situation. If I’m honest, nothing less than a withering haiku assist from the JVJL HS English honors class, a la Showbiz, can bring true closure here. Finest kind, Onstad, finest kind.
Jay Williams
2023-11-18 00:35:10 +0000 UTCI'm changing my dog's name to "Sabbath Titties" forthwith.
Rob Dalton
2023-11-18 00:18:54 +0000 UTCNeed a sticker of Hockawock with the caption "So Sad, So Nasty"
Eric Bradford
2023-11-17 23:03:16 +0000 UTCGod, BB is about to get his car horn fired up
Jenn
2023-11-17 20:22:10 +0000 UTCSurely you mean catsup
Spyguitar
2023-11-17 20:15:41 +0000 UTCComing up with new slang like that is just one of the reasons we love you Chris. Sabbath titties was utterly believable until I read that text above.
Paul Dunn
2023-11-17 20:14:30 +0000 UTCHonestly this could just be a chorus hook for a new Lil’ Jon and the Eastside Boyz single.
“Cool Mayonnaise” Hank Spurlock
2023-11-17 20:06:34 +0000 UTCI am also wondering about how Lonis’s Irish dancing spell has worn off. Or maybe it is/was able to coexist with Butters’ prior life and predilections?
Matt Mitchell
2023-11-17 19:38:46 +0000 UTCShouldn't he be Irish dancing in the dreams of chubby post-menopausal realtors?
Matthew Harris
2023-11-17 19:19:51 +0000 UTCRay serves up only the finest sass.
Julie (HiDeeHoGal)
2023-11-17 19:18:35 +0000 UTC@souvlaki Alabama I was born and raised there and have only done the former, although it's possible that I risked the latter and an order of garlic fries foreclosed the possibility of anything taking root in my body.
Jay Y
2023-11-17 18:57:36 +0000 UTC@Brody in most cultures, one's profane initiation into the world of body horror comes via Cronenberg or Eraserhead. In the PNW, you visited a tide pool in elementary school and know the rudiments of marine biology.
Jay Y
2023-11-17 18:56:42 +0000 UTCpretending like we didn't know about sabbath titties already, the nerve
Michael Ryan
2023-11-17 18:39:33 +0000 UTCSister graduated from Evergreen. Knew the mascot was a geoduck, but was stunned they had a song about it. Go, Geoducks go, Through the mud and the sand, let’s go. Siphon high, squirt it out, swivel all about, let it all hang out. Go, Geoducks go, Stretch your necks when the tide is low Siphon high, squirt it out, swivel all about, let it all hang out.
Jenn
2023-11-17 18:38:42 +0000 UTCThere are two rights of passage for new residents to the PNW. One is eating geoduck, and the other is getting Norovirus from an Ivar’s- I’ve only done one of these.
souvlaki Alabama
2023-11-17 18:35:31 +0000 UTCRay forms Black Sabbath Titties, to use Ozzy's AI voice to sing Dance Like There's Ass in You Pants
Rob Satterfield
2023-11-17 18:35:03 +0000 UTCIt is always good to ketchup with Butters.
b.zap
2023-11-17 18:27:27 +0000 UTCSo sad, so nasty. How did it feel when they picked out the casket? One for each nut that they plucked from your basket?
J Hardy Carroll
2023-11-17 18:27:19 +0000 UTCChuckling to myself having a solo lunch break in a pub near the office. The words are perfect, as always. But the speechless panels of Ray listening - sublime.
Jacquelyn R Walters
2023-11-17 18:23:09 +0000 UTCI've never heard it pronounced (checks online). Thank you for saving me from that formerly-gifted-child thing of mispronouncing words wrong because I've only ever read them!
Brody
2023-11-17 18:22:25 +0000 UTClike...who the fuck thinks like this (Onstad thinks like this).
Brody
2023-11-17 18:21:14 +0000 UTCSeems like Pat's performance a couple weeks ago inspired Ray to some new heights of sass-mouth.
Oppido
2023-11-17 18:19:27 +0000 UTCYeah, the Portland influence is strong in this one.
Oppido
2023-11-17 18:16:23 +0000 UTCThe burger king trip- awesome line. Hahahaha
Alexander Rediger
2023-11-17 18:11:59 +0000 UTCNo one drops the oratory pain like Ray
Yelahneb Unicornucopiax
2023-11-17 18:08:20 +0000 UTCYou just KNOW Ray doesn't know that Geoduck is spelled that way
Miles McMahon
2023-11-17 18:08:11 +0000 UTC"a horny geoduck in a deli cup" The Pacific Northwest has finally rubbed off on Onstad.
Jay Y
2023-11-17 18:06:59 +0000 UTCWhen in the HELL did Lonis's voodoo wear-off? Butters should still be neck deep in frosted tips and BMW-butts
Josh Egbert
2023-11-17 18:05:01 +0000 UTCTremendous language in this strip, fantastic stuff
Cayce
2023-11-17 18:03:56 +0000 UTCFUCK YOU FRIDAY IS BACK, BAYBEE
bootblacking
2023-11-17 18:03:30 +0000 UTC
