How To Properly Name A Horse

oh and ofc if it has a baby horse I’ll name it Realm Town

JG

gonna name my horse “Evermore: The Theme Park That Wasn’t”

JG

Where I ride, there are some of the "classy" names like Hudson and Picasso and Aria, then we have bangers like Frodo and Bootstrap.

ScrappyDooStan

great timing, I've been waiting for the hauler to drop off an auction horse all day. the mare doesnt have a name yet and the only names my friends have suggested are Lowes, Horus, and Horse E

w5w

Our fancy race horse name family tree came our great! Dunk on these fools (stud) + Actually, I'm not french(mare) = Actually, I can't dunk. An excellent name for our firstborn- thanks Jenny!

Scrum Diddely Umptious

When I was a little kid my mom and I went to a horse race while she was pregnant and we just bet on the horses with the funniest names until one won, and the one that got us the win was named Turkey Lou Pickle. We started calling my sister Pickle as a nickname when she was born and now she owns it. Thanks, Turkey Lou Pickle!

Owlbean

Jellicle horse comes out tonight, going to jump over the jellicle hurdles

Autumn Taylor

Race horse named "somehow Palpatine returned"

Phoenix Wright

Really love the twilight zone horse names, I think star trek tos episode names would also be great horse names.. For the World is Hollow and I Have Touched the Sky, and Is There in Truth no Beauty? would both be great

taylor moylan

My horse came with the barn name Rain, but her registered name with the APHA is "QTS Fancy Moonshadow". But she was named after Rain from Spirit so how could I not keep that?? My rescued mustang came with the name "Luna" which I changed to "Rogue", but her full name is Rogue Shadow after the space ship from the Star Wars video game I have never played. I was pretty adamant about giving her a Star Wars name so I'm so happy you mentioned them being good names for horses haha.

Nuke LaBelle

When I was really young, we had a house in the country with a lot of land. My parents wanted a horse, so they found a sudo "horse rescue" and found a farm horse (something happened to the farm and it ended up here). It was a female and they wanted me to name it. The only girl name I knew at the time was April, as in "April O'Neil channel 6 news", so I went with that. April was a really funny lady. She had this massive open space to galop around in, but anytime she had to uh, "use the powder room" she would full speed run back to her little barn and do it in there. Then, she would stick her head in through a window and watch my father clean it up. We also used to go watch the Clydesdale's show once in a while, I miss doing that.

Space_Husky

there is so much wisdom in this video

Jessica Pirnat

im just watching old rambles but some of my pet names include: cucumber, toaster and goose. im a fan of random nouns idk idk

Gina Kim

i had a shetland pony named butterscotch growing up. this video immediately scalped me.

Libby

While I don't have a horse, I do find that Star Wars names make good animal names. My family has a dog named Lando.

Gavin W.A.

I don't have any real horses to name, but I am writing Fantasy stories at the moment, and have all sorts of animals helping the heroes out... up to this point I've just been naming them after characters from "Game of Thrones" or Michael Moorcock novels... 'cuz I'm nerdy/unimaginative like that!

Dee Crosier

This proves that rich people are insane.

I laughed so hard at; “Nervous guy in $4 room.” 😂

Dan Pecora

Horsey McHorseface. 🐴

UK73

(fun foaling factoids from:) "In horse breeding, what are the meanings of the words sire, grandsire, dam, and damsire?" <a href="https://www.quora.com/In-horse-breeding-what-are-the-meanings-of-the-words-sire-grandsire-dam-and-damsire" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://www.quora.com/In-horse-breeding-what-are-the-meanings-of-the-words-sire-grandsire-dam-and-damsire</a>

Steve Ray

I never thought of that :) but your comment inspired me to call her back and double check. As it happens, "My Bestie" was my dam, so I should introduce myself at parties as "I'm Steve Ray, 39-year-old philosopher-king, by 'Oui, Vraiment' out of 'My Bestie,' by 'Best of Eleven.'" Name translations are rare to begin with, but since My Bestie was in an Anglophone stable, it would have been my sire who got localized, becoming 'Yes, Indeed' or 'You Got That Right.'

Steve Ray

So, canonical name: Mon Ami(e) :)

I know this is late, but I just heard back from the equine genaeologist. My horse parents are "My Bestie" and "Oui, Vraiment."

Steve Ray

All my horses are just named Roach.

Greg McDaniel

My horse mom's name was Artax. I don't want to talk about it. Stupid swamp of sadness.

Greg McDaniel

My horse parents’ names were Dodge Charger and Gorgeous

George Dodd

I think this was only a meme in the world of JEN Patreonage, a matter of truly local interest.

Steve Ray

I didn't even know this was a meme, I just genuinely wanted to know your thoughts on horse names. Oops.

Bill Cass

I've had regrettably little experience with horses but when I was about 15 I went for a ride on a black horse called Onyx at Sun City. He was a good horse.

Stuart Payne

I live in Pennsylvania horse country. Every other person here has a horse. Sadly, I'm on the left out list. If I do get one though, I'm riding out on Banana Joe.

Tom Bowling

Has some Hudson Hawk MTVIA flashbacks during this post. Still, great stuff

T. Fazekas

I’m going out on a limb and saying the percentage of old-school My Little Ponies fans that actually owned real ponies is surprisingly high.

T. Fazekas

Ok its working from my laptop. I was getting "cannot find link" from my cellphone for some reason.

Jason Wynn

It should still be there! It's still set to unlisted and it's playing on my end. Sorry, I don't know what the problem could be. Is it still happening?

Jenny Nicholson

Did this video go away? I get an error when I try to go to it

Jason Wynn

Kelsey you're in the right place

Zapp Rowsdower

I'm so glad you made this! The only horse horse I "have" is the Giant Horse in Breath of the Wild. It's "Dr.Biggles". It has a PhD in Apple Consumption! I hope the name is satisfactory.

Bill Cass

Looking at the Twilight Zone titles I think they must have been a source of inspiration for ship names in Iain M. Banks' Culture series.

James Murphy

My partner's family had a horse named Jack. He was gigantic, clumsy, and unbelievably gentle. His sister Lucky was a beautiful show horse. She died in a fire, so her name wasn't really a good fit. Now they just have a stupid thoroughbred named Thunder. It's a bad horse.

Alex W

I dreamed of owning a horse but I was too poor growing up, but I had horse dolls! Inamed my favoritest horse toy Charliehorse (he is the most beautiful ugly stuffed 90s horse dolly ever), because I heard my dad say CHARLEY HORSE once while in pain and I was like "what a good idea."

Kelsey R Howell

Literally my thought process my entire life.

Kelsey R Howell

Welcome, indeed! I salute you for your excellent taste in videos, and your support for great internet content.

Steve Ray

Welcome Ethan!

this was everything i wanted and more

Marissa Wilk

OMG I love the TZ title name plan!!!

Andrew James Looney

I saw the preview for this on Twitter and immediately became a Patron.

EmperorEthan

I would name a horse after a comic book villain.

Jason James

Uhhh, no? I mean there was that one time with that vampire but other than that...

Joe Bloe

I looked up a list of the 50 best Twilight Zone episodes just to look at their titles. The only ones from this list that don't work at all as a horse name are "two" and "twenty-two." "Obsolete man" works well enough but I doubt anyone wants to call their prize racehorse "obsolete." Nobody's betting on that horse. Unless ironically naming your horse something derisive is common practice? I'd believe that.

tim_schu

I’d either name my race horse “Nothing in the Dark” or “U2 Sucks.”

Peter Marez

It sounds like you got to see this process up close and in great detail. I hope it didn't suck too badly for you.

Steve Ray

also I’m constantly thinking of weird words and phrases and it’s a goddamn shame I’ve never been drafted as a racehorse namer. Puckle Gun. Not On My Watch. Female Pope. The Barter System. Dullard’s Dream. Late Night Talk Show. Speedy Gonzales But Not Racist. Quote Retweet. Quvenzhane Wallis Horse Version. Wicked Wednesday. Tuna On Rye.

Andrew Kornfeld

I was sort of expecting “Jimmy Scrambles” on the end of the list of Star Wars horse names as an—pardon the pun—Easter egg for the superfans.

Andrew Kornfeld

i also had one named disco which i thought was cute

Evan Bobrow

i’ve never had the opportunity to name a horse, i’m just realizing now though that one of the horses i road the longest was named lightning which considering my slight obsession with lightning mcqueen it’s kind of wild i’ve never put that together

Evan Bobrow

This video was better than I'd ever dreamed! And Horse Prisoner #4546 has been given a full pardon and will forevermore be known as "Sandstorm." Thanks again!

Steve Ray

Hahaha well funny story about that... Wild Bill was not wild at all. In fact we gave him to a lot of the more timid kids who came for lessons because we knew he'd be gentle. One afternoon a coworker and I wanted to go riding so I thought to try him bareback since nothing seemed to phase him... The second I mounted without a saddle it is like a demon possessed this sandy tan pony and he bucked me off so fast - like full on double leg back kicks and I had to roll out of the way to avoid being stomped on. We were like WELP. Can't say we weren't warned... Hahaha I guess you could say the same for Chewie XD horse personalities are such a gift to this world

Leesah

I'm not too keen on an actual reality show 'cause that would just be depressing. The "I Can Change Him" trope is a source of parody because it's a terrible thing - you can't change him, he'll just drag you deeper into conceding his narcissism/violent temper/vampirism. Romanticising it or playing it out as straight entertainment is to be made fun of. However you could do a scripted Larry Sanders/Burning Love/Unreal thing with it.

Joe Bloe

I did almost get a horse named Jen. I was pronounced "yen" but still, that would have been weird.

Jenny Nicholson

I love Wild Bill. Because Bill is not a very Wild name to follow "Wild" up with. Was he wild enough to merit the name? There's a horse at my stables named Chewie, I thought it was because he's big and brown and hairy but it's actually because he's an extremely angry horse who bites absolutely everyone he can. (I tried for a while to gentle Chewie by giving him carrots only if his ears were forward and he let me stroke his neck, but he learned that like it was a trick and would go back to biting right after the carrot was eaten.)

Jenny Nicholson

"I Can Change Him" could be the premise of a great reality/dating/game show! Each episode could have Mr. Potential, his Bitter Ex, and a New Optimistic Girl who thinks She Can Change Him. Lots of interviews where *he* talks about how his flaw is no big thing and everyone loves it, and Bitter Ex harps on how he never took any of her hints, and New Optimist muses about how she really *can* fix him, and the Bitter Ex just never loved him enough.

Steve Ray

The Animal Topics Coalition is an organic grass-roots movement, open to both Patrons and Creators working together to bring about a more-adorable world. In the July 2018 Ramble Vote, we will be supporting "Ranking Disney Animal Sidekicks," in part because we think Jenny will get a kick out of it! Can you imagine her bubbly excitement after she has to re-watch *every* Disney cartoon *ever*, just for quality control? Vote Animal Topics and SEE the SMILES!

Steve Ray

Hahaha this is so on point its amazing. I grew up working on a ranch and many horses passed our way. My favorite names being a paint named "Parfait", a retired thoroughbred named "Lacee Panties" and a pony named "Wild Bill". We did mostly western riding so we had our fair share of what you mentioned including a Smokey, Scout, Mac, Prairie, and Moe.

Leesah

Unrelated to horse names: Your love of the "I can change him" trope would be a good basis for a Youtube Original. Although I might just be taking your love triangle pitch and changing it almost not at all.

Joe Bloe

Hath thou given the horse strength? Hast thou clothed his neck with thunder? Canst thou make him afraid as a grasshopper? The glory of his nostrils is terrible. He paweth in the valley, and rejoiceth in his strength.

Steve Ray

Hearken unto this, O Patrons: stand still, and consider the wondrous works of our hostess, who teacheth us more than the beasts of the earth, things too wonderful for us, which we knew not. and maketh us wiser than the fowls of heaven.

Steve Ray

This is hilarious. I would've never known this otherwise. Ever. +$4

Lawrence Whiteside

oh my god this finally won

Ryan Grondzik

The combination horse names are literally the absolute peak of human creativity.

Zach Simonson

This video made me hungry

Luis

Blue Corn: Jenny, the pheasants are revolting. Jenny: Finally, something we can agree on.

Thomas Allen Wood

I will name my race horse "Will the Real Martian Please Stand Up? His horse parents were Slim Shady and Matt Damon.

Eric MacMillan

She threw the peasants a bone, to prevent a bloody revolution

Blue Corn

I must have had a lapse in attention, I didn't know this won the vote. In my best Emily Litella voice: Never mind.

Thomas Allen Wood

I mean, she did do the topic that won, and she is de facto monarch of JennyClub so....

Wait, this subject didn't win in the voting, did it? Did 'Big Jenny' just apply her will and do the subject that she intended to do all along? Have we been gaslighted? To answer the question: Mr. Ed

Thomas Allen Wood

xmas in july

Dundough Breadbox

Huh, I hope the comment function works for me again because I need to get that out: one of my friends actually named her jumping horse "Asshole" just so everytime he's taking part in a tournament they have to announce "so-and-so on ASSHOLE". The poor horse doesn't have a barn name. He's just asshole. It's mean. I'm not from the US so maybe you guys have laws in place that prevent a horse from officially getting named a dirty word?

R2

I would have to defer to the expert on that question. Sometimes if you are soooo obvious in the name choice, that itself makes it cool. I am definitely not cool enough to pull it off.

Sean Kelly

Names for a big strong horse: Silent Thunder, Dark Storm, Striker, Vaguely Sexual

The BabaDuck

Farfalle DiAngelo

Alex Belanger

My first horse was this monstrous (really. He was drugged when we bought him and nearly injured my little 12-year-old self many times once the drugs wore off) Appendix Quarter Horse who had Tru blood, so his show name was Jus Passin Tru. His barn name was Mason. And he came with a bonus barn name because he’d been loaned to a summer camp right before we bought him where they called him Moose for some reason.

Chelsea Clark

I feel the only glimpse of that Lightsaber video we'll ever get will be it playing in the background (and out of focus of course!) of Jenny's very last video.

This is amazing, and I need horses named after twilight zone eps ASAP!! I just rewatched through it a few times and all the episode titles are so A+. I think my personal pick would be Stroopwafel though 👍

Pocket & Locket

Jenny Nicholson = Spinning Jenny x Jack Nicholson

Zapp Rowsdower

Is “The Last Night of a Jockey” a bit too on the nose for a horse?

I now want to become a tycoon of industry for the sole purpose of buying an expensive racing horse and naming it either "I am the Night-Color Me Black" or "The Brain Center at Whipple's."

Sean Kelly

Jenny Nicholson = General Grievous x Nickelodeon

Cranderveldt

I’ve been on such a rollercoaster with this topic for so long, and now it’s finally complete...alas now emptiness. I already miss the thrill of the chase! The monthly highs and lows at every vote, and now it’s here and it’s spectacular but oh so fleeting...like sand through the hourglass. Well, I guess there’s always the Lightsaber video.

Jenny Nicholson = Generous Benefactor x Nickles from Heaven

Skysick

Like "F U Pancakes" ? Sorry, "Mr. F U Pancakes"

Zapp Rowsdower

This will most likely be the most informative 6 and a half minutes I'll encounter on the Internet for quite some time. And based on this video, I'm naming my horse "Nabisco."

Theme Park Review

All jokes aside thanks for listening to the fans!

Sean Kelly

is naming a horse after yourself generally frowned upon?

F W Pancakes

Surprisingly informative; here I thought this was going to be primarily a joke video, and I come away from it knowing new things. An uncle of mine had a horse when I was a child that came named already, and tragically wouldn't respond to anything else: Cutie. Alas, we didn't have her for long. Under a year. She got rabies [turns out she hadn't been vaccinated :|] and that was the end of that. Only tangentially related: when Justify won....whatever it was they won, an article I came across about it was titled "Unbeaten Justify Wins [whatever it was], and I read the piece because Unbeaten Justify is a SICK name for a horse. Was disappointed to find the horse's name was actually just Justify. Unbeaten Justify is also a great band or Jaeger name.

The Doom Merchant

Jenny you are too good

Zapp Rowsdower

IT'S A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE!!!!

Theme Park Review

I was just about to take a break, wondering what to do, and then here comes this gem :D

TalysAlankil