After-Holiday Blues
Added 2023-04-10 13:32:12 +0000 UTCFirst off, I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday. I know for me, it was a pleasure getting four days off, resting (not really), and spending time with Julio and Jim, Emily and Eli.
One thing that has never really changed with me, is the after-holiday blues. Even a confident lass like me struggles with my body big time. I’m bigger than I was, and that’s a hard pill for me to swallow sometimes. I’ve worked really hard to have people respect me..not for my looks, but for my skill. It’s been a long road, and for someone who used to take pride in being thin and attractive (I was young)—I’ve dealt with a lot of backlash. When I transitioned from not giving a fuck about my looks to my art, people dropped off and stopped supporting me. Did I care? Nah, but it was an inadvertent synopsis on human psychology.
I gained weight; I quit wearing leather; I focused on my career.
That was a no-no to people, and it showed me that people didn’t value me for me.
At any rate, there are still times (like now) that I’m sitting in my car saying, “I drank too much” over the weekend. I’m bloated, my face is bloated, and I’m beating the hell out of myself for having a good time.
I have to stop doing that. I want to lose some weight again for the sake of my knee and health, but I can’t do it because I have this pre-conceived notion of myself and how I’m supposed to look.
The “after party” sucks, but I think it’s a good reminder to tell you all that nobody is impervious to regret, guilt, and shame. And, I suppose if anyone is going to post their foopa and show you that—it’ll be me.
Comments
🥹🥹🥹🥹😭😭😭😭
Cory Cowley
2023-04-16 15:47:19 +0000 UTCIt makes me feel happy, that I can support you and give you some energy! Just doing my best, and I am just me, that is all.
jean grieten
2023-04-11 14:17:15 +0000 UTCAlways beautiful and always amazing!
SmokyMtnBerserker
2023-04-11 10:53:57 +0000 UTCYou are such an exceptional human being. Thank you for always being such a wonderful, uplifting source of energy!
Cory Cowley
2023-04-10 23:36:58 +0000 UTCAnd I love you, doll.
Cory Cowley
2023-04-10 23:36:15 +0000 UTCLuv ya, ya know gal. 🤗😘🌹
The Devils Blood aka Thomas Quante
2023-04-10 17:00:57 +0000 UTCYou look amazing Cory !! Do not let others judge you on how you look or what you do. Do what you like the best and enjoy it, live your life like you want it. I know what it is to not be liked and be different, I am one of those so I do understand you completely. But I did change now, and I do not worry about being like or not, if people do not like me, then they can go their way. To me, it means that they are not meant to be in my life. The people that did not support you anymore when you changed, did not really like then what you do, because it is not the look that makes it, it is the talent and the performance! And I see you have both !! You are an amazingly talented and great artist, and you excel in what you do. I will always support your work because I love it and do believe in you and nothing will change that, especially not your look!
jean grieten
2023-04-10 14:00:30 +0000 UTC![[井戸水屋]黒すけ](https://xaiju.com/istorage/37951.jpg)
