The Pain of History Part 1.
Added 2022-03-18 00:41:14 +0000 UTCToday I cried at work. I know what you’re thinking.
“Cory had a stressful day.”
Yes, I did, but for the first time in a long time I came face to face with the ugliness of history.
I’m what you call a very hardened individual. When I’m not acquainted with you, I have a tendency to be abrasive, cold, and quite honestly very hostile. I will admit, I’m kinder to people on the internet than in person. Why? Because there’s a higher chance of being hurt, and being hurt…well, it sucks.
My boss at work sat with me. We signed my coworkers card for her farewell to the new store. Most of the time, I tend to keep things light-hearted and the sarcasm at an all-time high. What Jason asked me was something I suppose I didn’t anticipate:
“Are your parents dead?”
The answer is obvious, no, but anyone who has any experience in life knows such a question is only asked to understand a facet of one’s personality. In those moments, I gave the most brutally honest answer I’ve given in a long time.
“My mother is alive. My father wants nothing to do with me.”
I suppose the answer was something he either expected, or he didn’t believe. The subtle eyebrow raise and furrows at the corners of his mouth gave the impression that he didn’t quite take it as an answer. In those moments, I was very angry.
Jason comes from a good home. He’s married with two kids, and his daughters will never have to experience the things some of us unfortunately have to go through. With that being said, I don’t think he realizes at times how it has a tendency to come off as gloating, as if to say, “my life is what yours will never be, and my kids will always stay innocent.”
And I know that. Innocence lost at a tender age is like a mirror shattering into a thousand pieces. I didn’t get a choice in the matter, and frankly, I wouldn’t have changed it. With the conversations rolling through my head of his mentions about the laughter of innocence, the purity of youth, and the never ending blue sky on the horizon…in those moments—I fucking hated him.
Comments
Management sometimes should learn to keep their thoughts to themselves. As they really have no idea what their employees deal with. Mine never will, I keep them all mostly at a distance and always guessing.
Philip Kimpton
2022-03-18 00:54:40 +0000 UTCI can't think of a situation that is ever an appropriate question to ask of someone. Seems to me his opinion of you had already been made. Fuck him. I'd try to not suffer fools, but that is more difficult when it is coming from a work "superior." Such behavior only contributes to the struggles you've already overcome. Some people like to step on others to make themselves feel bigger than they are. The behavior is rooted in their own insecurities. Sucks to have to deal with that.
Mike Peelman
2022-03-18 00:50:51 +0000 UTC
