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Bitter Karella
Bitter Karella

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Midnight Pals: Sinners

Ryan Coogler: Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I call this the tale of the sinners
Coogler: so you ever watch a movie where for the first half you think you're watching one kind of movie
Coogler: but then in the third reel suddenly its about vampires doing a siege on a bar?
Quentin Tarantino: oh yeah yeah definitely
Tarantino: who hasn't?

Coogler: have you ever thought about the incredible power of music?
Coogler: music can bring heal the afflicted, soothe the soul…
Coogler: transport you to another place!
Coogler: why, i'm always saying that musicians are the storytellers of the modern age

Coogler: and let me tell you there's no music more powerful
Coogler: then delta blues
Coogler: it can literally rip through the veil of reality into the world beyond
Victor LaValle: this is true

Coogler: there's these two brothers who want to start a juke joint
Coogler: but these vampires try to destroy them with the power
Coogler: of extremely lame white music

Coogler: because let me tell you
Coogler: this white people music the vampires play
Coogler: it does NOT have phat beat you can bug out to
Stephen King: ha ha it's true!
King: we're so lame ha ha!

HP Lovecraft: [sweats] n-now wait just a minute
Lovecraft: i can't just stand by and listen to this slander
Lovecraft: against the honor of white people music!
King: oo oo
King: that's not
King: that's not a good look

Poe: yeah you're gonna have to excuse howard, he's extremely racist
Coogler: why do you let him keep coming here then
Poe:
Poe: well i mean
Poe: he's not racist against US
King: yeah he's always been really nice to us

Lovecraft: why, i'll have you know that some of the most adequate musical compositions of all time were written by white people!
Coogler: whatever, man
Coogler: it's all reels and jigs to me

Lovecraft: i-i-i
Lovecraft: how dare you!
Lovecraft: white people music is a long and beautiful tradition!
Lovecraft: barry manilow! Jonathan coulton! Nickelback!
Lovecraft: who are you to deny their greatness?!
Coogler:

Lovecraft: if you don't think white people music is any good, then just listen to this
Lovecraft: [immediately eats shit, it is not clear what kind of music he was trying to make]

Stephen King: ok ryan i hear what you're saying
King: but i think i can convince you that white people music can be pretty
King: as the kids say
King: "cool"
Coogler:
King: pretty "hip"
King: real "dope"
King: and even
King: "pretty fly"

Coogler: ok i'm listening, whatcha got for me?
King: well
King: have you heard of a little band called
King: pause for effect
King: the rock bottom remainders?

Comments

King: performs "Pretty Fly for a White Guy" World's reaction: Not really

Shirley R


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