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Bitter Karella
Bitter Karella

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Midnight Pals: The white powder that makes you into a goo

Arthur Machen: Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I call this the tale of the white powder
Machen: it's about this white powder that turns you into a big blob of goo

Barker: haha oh man i hate when that happens
Barker: hahaha- oh
Barker: oh shit i'm sorry
Lor Gislason: bloop bloop i'm sitting right here

Machen: so there's this law student who's studying way too hard and he's just exhausted
Machen: so he gets this white power that's supposed to give him more energy
Barker: sound familiar steve?
Stephen King: i don't really like to talk about that

Machen: the doctor prescribes this white powder that gives you energy
Machen: but the chemist messes up
Machen: and gives him the white powder that turns you into goo

King: so instead of getting the white powder that gives you energy he gets the white powder that turns you into goo?
King: that seems like a pretty major mistake
Machen: yeah its not ideal

Machen: now there's a thing about this white powder that turns you into goo
Barker: oh yeah? is there?
Barker: if you could describe the white powder that turns you into goo in a single word
Barker: what would that word be?
Machen: hmm well let me think
Barker: c'mon just say it
Barker: you know you want to

Machen: i guess if i had to describe the white powder that turns you into goo with just a single word
Barker: oh god he's going to say it
Machen: i think that word would be
Barker: here we go
Machen: queer
Barker: ah ha ha! he said it!
Barker: the absolute madman!

Machen: it's just a very queer sort of powder
Barker: ahahaha he said it!
Machen: i don't see what's so funny
Machen: i'm just accurately describing the powder
King: it's nothing Arthur, just ignore him
King: finish your story

Machen: so they take the white powder and analyze it
Machen: and it turns out
Machen: that it was actually not medicine at all
Machen: they accidentally gave the guy the vinum sabbati that they use for satanic mass
Machen: it's a real whoopsie doodle

King: so he was actually taking vinum sabbati instead? that explains it
Barker: does it steve? does it explain it?
King: oh yeah everyone knows that vinum sabbati separates your spiritual higher self from your corporeal sludge
Barker:
King: it's like that star trek tng episode
Barker: what
Poe: oh yeah, skin of evil
King: that's the one

Koontz: so vinum sabbati turns you into a goo?
King: that's right
Koontz: is that what happened to lor
King: dean! you can't just say that!
King: it's very rude
Gislason: bloop bloop yeah no that's what happened

Barker: i think if there's one lesson to be learned here
Barker: its that, given the chance
Barker: i would definitely take the white powder that turns you into a goo
Barker: i think i speak for everyone here

Poe: oh i don't know about that clive
Koontz: i wanna be a goo too!
Poe: you don't know what we're talking about dean

Fitz James O'Brien: so i hear you're in the market for the white powder that turns you into a goo
O'Brien: i can get you some of the white powder that turns you into a goo
O'Brien: if you're cool
Barker: oh yeah yeah we're cool
King: do you have any other kinds of white powder

Poe: steve
King: i mean no no you're right that's all behind me
King: stay strong steve stay strong!

Comments

Recovery is a bitch Steve, you got this.

Shirley R

Alas, poor Lor…!

T. Ledoux


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