Update: Sexually repressed Casey

I believe I mentioned it earlier, but Casey is supposed to be sexually repressed, but she doesn't really act that way in most of her scenes. For that reason, I started editing 2 major ones where she's "out of character," in my opinion.

The first one I want to talk about is the hand holding scene. In this one, Casey was the aggressor, and Kira was awkwardly embarrassed about it. I completely swapped their names in this story so that Kira's the aggressor and now Casey is embarrassed instead of awkward. I also did my best to keep Kira awkward.

The second one is the foot fetish scene. In this, Casey was egging Kira on the whole time. I've changed her to be ashamed and nervous about other students watching what's happening, but she's still the one getting her feet touched/sucked. I put Kira in the driver's seat. She's always out to please and motivated by trying to make Casey feel good.

Here's something that might be controversial: With Casey sexually repressed and Kira socially awkward, I had to cut the scene short. It used to be that Casey got so hot and bothered, she started masturbating right in the middle of class. Given that Casey's so repressed, I couldn't justify this happening anymore. Instead, she gets so hot and bothered she asks Kira to stop because she's afraid she's going to make a scene. Kira, being socially awkward and always aiming to please, doesn't try to force the issue.

I tried for some time to get the story to end in Casey's orgasm, but I couldn't think of a way to do it. The change does kind of make sense, though. The foot fetish scene comes first and it was kind of weird to go from masturbation to hand holding.

I'd love your input on this change. Would anyone be interested in proof reading it?

Tonight, I changed a bunch of punctuation issues where I had commas or periods after quotation marks.