Rude TAROT of Magic: The Emperor
Added 2023-09-11 10:00:03 +0000 UTCMe: Yo! Did you see this freak’s chair? So tall and ornate! So cushioned and…perfumed???? This chair is insane! One day, I would like to sit in a chair like that!
You: I’m afraid there is no path for you to sit in such a chair.
Me: Huh? And WHY not?
You: Because to sit in that cha- to sit in that THRONE, you must succeed the current Emperor. And to do that, a man in your position has no choice but murder.
Me: Murder, eh? Methinks NO chair is worth the staining of one’s soul…but then again the…what did you call it? throne?…the THRONE is unusually tall and perfumed…
You: Are you really considering assassinating the Emperor for a mere symbol of power? You do know that along with the throne itself you would also be heir to more military, legal, and religious power than you can possibly imagine?
Me: I want to sit somewhere amazing. A good sit can change a person. I’m tired of you complicating my desires. I’m tired of you doubting me.
*BANG* *GASPS* *”THE EMPEROR…IS DEAD!”* “LONG LIVE THE EMPEROR”*
Me: Guards, I am your new Emperor! Now, take this man away!
You: No! Please! No! I’m sorry! I take it all back!
Me: Good riddance! My first decree is that my throne(?) shall henceforth be known as My Chair! And ANYONE may sit on it WHENEVER they like! If I didn't make this change, I would be exposing myself to murder! I don't want to die! I'm not crazy!
