XaiJu
zpico
zpico

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Script (old version)

Here is the script of the next pages of the chapter 2 (the one I did not finish lol). I thought it would be cool to let you read it. Don't know if I'll be able to use it later, so...  French version at the end !

It starts just after the Lipstick scene.

"A cop arrives

- Are you alright there?

- Oh, Officer ! (the Boy gets up hurriedly and throws himself at him) Yes ... everything ... everything is fine (he's afraid the cop see that Joris is currently blind because of him)

-You sure ? He looks in a poor shape (the cop points his flashlight at Joris).

- Yeah, yeah ... Joris, stand up and show the Officer you're fine!

(Joris stands up painfully and slowly, it's reaaaally long. it takes a few  "still" panels)

- See ? He's doing extremly well ! 

(in his back, Joris falls to the ground)

- Listen to me, (the boy whispers) There's a man behind me, he's mentally ill. You have to stop him, but be careful, I think he has a gun in his pants.

The cop looks over the boy's shoulder.

-I'm sorry, I do not see anything ...

- What?! (the boy turns around) But he was there a second ago ! Big, a black jacket, disguised as a raccoon! He was there right next to me, waiting for our friend to... sleep it off ... Last time, he even tried to kidnap me to take me in his bouncy castle ! That's what he told me !!!

(The cop points his light at the boy's face) 

-Are you taking drugs, boy?

- Wha-NO ! ...O-okay, now that I'm telling that, it sounds a little weird ... but it's the truth!

-You and your boyfriend will follow me to the post, right now.

(He grabs him by the arm and is about to take him with him.)

-No wait what,  he's not my boyf-

- (Tera) Well, little brother, what are you doing? I looked for you everywhere ! There is a problem, sir?

-It's him ! I recognize his clothes, he hid his mask somewhere!

- (Cop) He's your brother? 

- (Tera) Yes, forgive him, he's got quite a temper! He watched too many movies, he doesn't know what he says! The last time we found him (...storytime, he's lying of course)

- ... (the Boy, upset, turns to the cop) Gimme a taser. I need a taser !!

- (The cop, ignoring the Boy) Haha yes I know what it's like, I have a nephew who is exactly the same !

- I know you have a gun ! Where is it ?? (The Boy suddenly pulls the belt of  Tera - and also his boxer. He's able to see everything in it.)  ...   ...  ( hushed silence)  

(The Cop is like "dude wtf, aren't they supposed to be brothers ?? )

(Tera is poker face.) 

(the Boy, facing the Cop) ... maybe not ._.  "


French : 

"Un flic débarque.

- Est ce que tout va bien là bas ? 

-  Monsieur l’agent ! (le garçon se lève précipitamment et se jette sur lui) Oui… tout… tout vas très bien (il ne veut pas attirer l'attention sur Joris, qu'il vient d'aveugler).

-Vous êtes sûr ? Il a l’air mal en point (le flic pointe sa lampe sur Joris).

- Oui ... oui… Joris, lève toi et montre à monsieur l’agent que tu vas bien !

(Joris se lève péniblement, c’est long. Tréééés long. La scène prend plusieurs cases).

- Vous voyez ! En pleine forme !

(Dans son dos, Joris retombe par terre) 

- Ecoutez moi, (le garçon chuchote) Il y a un homme, derrière moi, c’est un malade mental. Il faut que vous l’arrêtiez, mais faites attention, je crois qu’il a un pistolet dans son pantalon.

-Le flic regarde par dessus l’épaule du garçon.

-Je suis désolé, je ne vois personne...

- Quoi ?? (le garçon se retourne) Mais il était là il y a une seconde ! Grand, une veste noire, déguisé en raton laveur ! Il était là juste à coté de moi, on attendait que notre ami… ...  décuve… La dernière fois il a même essayé de me kidnapper pour m’emmener dans son chateau gonflable ! 

- (Le flic pointe sa lampe sur le visage du garçon). Est ce que tu te drogues, mon garçon ?

- Qu-Non ! ...d’accord, maintenant que je le dis ça à l’air un peu tordu… mais c’est la vérité !

-Toi et ton copain vous allez me suivre au poste, tout de suite. 

(Il l’attrape par le bras et va pour l’emmener avec lui)

-Non, attendez, c'est pas mon cop-

- (Tera) Bah alors petit frère, qu’est ce que tu fais ? Je t’ai cherché partout ! Il y a un problème monsieur l’agent ?

-C’est lui ! Je reconnais ses vêtement, il a du cacher son masque quelque part ! 

-C’est votre frère ?

-Oui, pardonnez le il a un sacré caractère ! Il regarde  trop de film et ça lui monte à la tête, il ne sait plus ce qu’il dit ! La dernière fois on l’a retrouvé (….storytime, particulièrement gênante pour le garçon. Ce sont des mensonges biensur)

- … (le garçon, vexé par l'histoire du Loup, se retourne vers le flic) : donnez moi un taser. Vous avez bien un taser ??

- (Le flic ignore complètement le garçon) Haha oui je sais ce que c’est, j’ai un neveu qui est exactement pareil !

- Je sais qu'il a un flingue ! Ou est ce que tu l'as caché ?! (Le garçon tire subitement la ceinture du Loup, étirant aussi son boxer. Il peut voir tout ce qu'il s'y trouve.) 

- ...  ... (Gros blanc)

(Tera reste Poker face. Le Flic trouve la situation super malaisante.)

(Le Garçon lache lentement la ceinture en déglutissant. Il se tourne vers le flic, penaud) : ... Peut être pas, en fait ._. "

(...) "


Comments

what’s the lipstick scene? i never got to read the old version sadly

Gianna

Hey Fumachan! Gotta reply to all your comments, I love active Patrons !! 🥰 Haha maybe if you google it but I’m not sure ! It’s quite old. And this part wasn’t in it!

Z-Pico

Is there anywhere the old iteration of the comic is still there? 🤔 this scene got me curious 🐵

Fumachan

Well, the term french baguett got now a new meaning...including the package material. Nice, I love it. But please: write and post more of this! It is worth it's words in gold!

Michael Lohmeier

Mdr j adore 😂😂😂😂 il faut trop que ca apparaisse dans l histoire ca!! ! C a mourir de rire !

Atheom

OMG J'ai tellement ris...

SCramb

Lol omg! I’m dying!! Great turn of events!! 😂

Red

Omg lolol 😂😂

Strawberry 🍓

BOUNCY CASTLE!!! 😂😂 however will The Boy cute his way out !! I love it, livomg for these little moments ❤️🐈❤️🐺❤️🦄

Michelle Muhlbeier

Hahahhaha i just died ! Superbe scenario jadore !!!

Nazarij

J'en ai pleurer de rire! C'est vraiment agréable d'avoir la version française en tout cas😘

Kahlane

Hahahahhahauauauauahahshdixbdixhzosb no wait xDD I can't hahaha gosh noooo xD now I just wanna see that (I can see it in my mind but it's not the same, still is funny) gosh I can't hahaha this make my day, my week, my Year (My whole life lololol) wee poor boy, Tera will punish him xD and Jo, poor jo, he is so bad and noo way xD the final scene is epic, you have to include it in the future ♡ or maybe only draw it for us lololol I wanna see everybody poker face whit that

Lilithel

Hahahahahaha I can't stop laughing! XD I like that you share with us your old ideas :3 So, thx!

Fanmen

Haha 😂

Z-Pico

First time seeing his face and he's already in his pants 😂😂

Mayiu_chan

Haha I don't know, I've wrote a more "active" second chapter; but it may change, I don't know. I'm glad you like it ! I'm trying my best to do funny scenes haha

Z-Pico

🤣🤣🤣🤣 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾praying that you can use this later.... this sounds so funny! I always loved your way of story gellend and your dialogues! Do you think you will be able to connect the end of the NEW chapter one to the existing chapter two? I really loved what happens in chapter 2 so far! I was actually asking myself what will happen to chapter two ... will it be changed too? 🧐

Mym Phoenix McFly


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