The Extra Saved the Terminally Ill Princess and Ran Away - Chapter 16

Chapter 16: The Letter

***

"I deeply regret to inform you, but this appears to be all we could find..."

The man handed the tattered, torn scraps of cloth to the girl, reporting the outcome of her order.

The fate of the attendant who had fled to the Holy Kingdom, unable to endure her torment.

"...This is all?"

The girl stared at the man with dull, lifeless eyes.

Despite receiving contradictory and irrational orders—to find the one she had ordered killed, and to rescue him quickly—the man had done his utmost to fulfill them.

Now, seeing his liege wearing such a soul-crushed expression and bitter smile, he could only lower his head.

The girl cradled those worthless scraps of cloth against her chest like precious jewels, caressing them gently.

Her small lips, chapped from sleepless nights, parted slightly.

Only then did she utter the name of the boy she had longed for all this time.

"Finn... Finn... my one and only Finn..."

The girl handled the cloth scraps in her arms as if caressing a lover.

"Your Highness..."

The man was about to ask why she was behaving this way, but seeing her smile, he swallowed his words.

"..."

More precisely, because he recognized that expression—the final smile of those resigned to death.

"...I'm so sorry... I won't leave you alone anymore."

Soon after, red flowers began blooming from both hands of the girl holding the boy's belongings.

"Y-Your Highness!!!"

The man's form vanished in an instant as he grabbed the girl's arms and directed them skyward.

The red flowers blooming from her hands shot into the sky as a sphere glowing like a blood moon, and only then could the man breathe a sigh of relief.

-BOOM!!

He had barely managed to prevent the girl from directing that flower, that light, at herself.

But the girl had not yet abandoned her will to take her own life, so the man shouted with a voice trembling more than ever before.

"Let go...!"

"Everyone!! Restrain Her Highness!!! We cannot allow any harm to come to her!!!"

At the man's command, the guards one by one wrapped their arms around the girl's limbs. Unable to bring themselves to restrain their liege like a criminal, this was their only choice.

The girl struggled in the guards' embrace for a while before crying out in anguish, unable to contain her self-loathing and guilt that pierced like daggers through her chest.

"This is an order! Release me at once!!!"

"...I deeply apologize, but we cannot obey that order!!"

It was clear what would happen if they released her from their embrace. For them, mere guards, the girl's safety took precedence over her orders.

"I said let go...!"

"Li-Lili...!! What in the world is happening!! That light just now, what was..."

The girl, who had been struggling to break free from the guards' embrace, suddenly stopped moving at the appearance of her father.

Perhaps she couldn't bear to show her father the sight of his child choosing death, or perhaps she thought her current state was too shameful to show him—it was impossible to know which.

"Li-Lili... Don't tell me that light just now... was that you? No... why...?"

Though the girl's father noticed his daughter was being restrained by guards after casting magic,

He didn't understand why his daughter, who had run out screaming moments ago, now wore such an anguished expression in the guards' embrace.

The Emperor was the only one present who hadn't yet been informed of what had happened.

"Your Majesty... Actually..."

The man began explaining everything he knew to the Emperor, who still didn't understand what had occurred.

As the Emperor listened to the man's explanation, his expression gradually darkened with various emotions.

First came shock.

Then disbelief.

Doubt.

Despair.

Sorrow.

Sympathy.

Pity.

And finally, after understanding everything... the pain of guilt.

"Then that magic just now..."

The Emperor's gaze turned to his daughter.

"Now do you understand?! Do you finally understand?! I... I repaid kindness with evil!!! I can never take it back!! I must live the rest of my life drowning in guilt and sin...!!!"

The girl cried out to the Emperor, who now knew the whole truth—that she herself was responsible for pursuing and causing the death of the attendant who had tried to escape and find a way to live.

That she was a sinner who had repaid kindness with cruelty.

That she was barely human, having given such an order without recognizing her benefactor.

...And so she begged to be freed from this endless hell.

The girl seemed to believe that following the boy in death was the only way to atone for her sins.

The Emperor moved his lips, barely able to speak.

"Finn...!"

"Finn sacrificed himself because he wanted you to live! If you choose death here, won't his sacrifice be in vain!!!"

The Emperor's expression as he said this was somehow unnatural, distorted.

He knew his own repulsiveness. He found himself utterly disgusting for failing to recognize the boy's kindness and continuing to use his sacrifice to protect his daughter until the very end.

'But it should work'

The girl could only open and close her mouth at the Emperor's persuasion that choosing death here would render that kindness meaningless, as if the boy's efforts had never existed.

She seemed unable to decide between the thought that she should follow the boy who died alone and lonely in death,

And the thought that doing so would truly render the boy's death meaningless.

Seizing this momentum, the Emperor pleaded desperately with his daughter, who was still uncertain and wavering.

"Lili... if not for me... then at least for the boy who gave his life for you... you cannot choose death... hmm? Isn't that right... Lili..."

"..."

The girl lowered her head, unable to face her father's tear-stained face.

Then her eyes fell on the boy's belongings in her arms.

'...Finn, do you really want me to live...? Even me, who caused your death...?'

The girl gently shook her head at the question in her heart.

No, that couldn't be. No matter how much the boy sacrificed himself out of love for her, he couldn't have wished for death itself.

'Yes... rather than living with this guilt and pain of causing your death, remembering you... I should join you...'

'Ah...?'

In that moment, something flashed through the girl's mind.

In her own words, she realized what mistake she had nearly made.

That even her choice to die now was merely a decision born from being unable to bear the guilt of causing the boy's death.

So choosing death here was nothing more than an unsightly attempt to escape from pain.

Therefore...

'True atonement... is remembering you... cherishing your memory... and suffering... until death...'

She realized that death was a luxury she didn't deserve.

That it was only natural she shouldn't be allowed even to faint and give up everything, as she had when her mother died.

The girl understood.

Simply through her own thoughts.

And so, taking a deep breath to accept the hell given to her, the girl spoke through chapped lips in a shrill voice.

"...I understand, Father."

And so the girl resigned herself and made her decision. She resigned herself from choosing death. Instead, she decided to live her life remembering only the boy and thinking only of him.

"As long as I don't die... that's enough, right?"

"..."

Though the girl looked up at the Emperor as she said this, he felt an inexplicable chill at his daughter's gaze.

Because even though his daughter was clearly looking at him, her focus wasn't directed at him.

He could only swallow dryly at his daughter's gaze that seemed to accept everything while staring into some empty void, rather than at him.

***

"...Finn! I brought cosmos flowers today! I don't know if you'll like them... but I picked them myself! So I hope you'll be happy to receive them..."

The girl knelt before the stone slab placed in the autumn-tinged, slightly yellowed field and spoke these words.

She had repeated this same action so many times each day that a new path had been formed in the field from her footsteps.

As if truly showing her resolve to live remembering the boy for the rest of her life, the girl had taken to spending all her time at the boy's grave except for sleeping and using the bathroom.

She even brought lunch boxes to eat at the boy's grave, chattering away about trivial matters.

Talking to herself, responding to herself.

Looking like a madwoman to anyone who saw her...

***

"Finn...! It's raining heavily today! So I'll cast a spell to keep you from getting wet, okay?"

Soon after the girl chanted her spell, a curtain of wind enveloped the boy's grave, deflecting raindrops like an umbrella.

"Hehe... How's that? Aren't I amazing? Thanks to the elixir you gave me... I can use magic this well now... so using it for you is only natural..."

The girl spoke while continuing to reach toward the sky.

And so one hour passed...

Two hours...

Three hours...

As time passed, the girl's breathing became increasingly labored. Soon her complexion darkened, and then she collapsed on the spot.

The watching guards rushed to the girl's side, carrying her on their backs as they hurried toward the Imperial Palace.

...As if this had always happened. With very familiar movements.

***

"...Again today?"

"...Please punish us powerless ones."

The Emperor waved his hand at the man who bowed his head and offered his neck.

He was no different from the man... no, as a father who couldn't do anything despite being her parent, he found it even harder to escape that responsibility, so he had no thought of punishing the man.

"...Enough. I didn't even expect you to solve a problem that I myself cannot handle... Sigh... More importantly, what should we do about that child..."

-Rustle...

The Emperor, who had been clutching his head in agony, watched as papers scattered from his desk.

Soon after, as if remembering something, the Emperor took out a letter he had hidden in his drawer.

"Your Majesty? Is that..."

There was a possibility. Surely, as the attendant himself had said that his daughter would recognize his handwriting, this was worth trying.

The Emperor seemed not to hear the man's question. Soon after, he looked up at the man staring at him questioningly and ordered with wide eyes.

"Qu-Quickly bring me a magician who can use clairvoyance magic!!"

'I hope the letter's contents will be of help to Lili... please let it be so...'

The Emperor hoped that this letter, that loyal attendant, would save his daughter once again. Though truly shameless, he still hoped.

Whether the Emperor's prayers reached heaven,

...Soon after, the court magician used clairvoyance magic on the letter to reveal its contents to the Emperor,

And after magically confirming the letter's contents first, the Emperor grabbed the still-unopened letter and hurried to find his daughter.

With the single hope that this might restore his daughter to her former self.

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