Raise Your Hand - Editing Banter
Added 2019-02-01 06:09:17 +0000 UTC
Story (End of Part 1)
SG (Editor): Thoughts, in order: Yes I picked up on what you were doing. Yes my arm raised - albeit not that much? it wasn't straight up but it was about halfway there, but I think that's more just me. For some reason it's hard to imagine my arm being that light. Anyway, I like the idea and I'm curious to see where you go from there. I may have to try editing again since I kind of stopped halfway through...I was distracted, give me a break. :oP
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Story: Her face completely relaxed and turning deep, deep red.
SG: That would be my reaction, i think :oP
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Story: “Hypnotized? But hypnosis isn’t real! It’s all fake how can she be…” Rayne took a deep breath and read on “I’m going to be hypnotized? I’m going to be hypnotized! Am I already hypnotized?! OMG! I’m being hypnotized! I’m being hypno…”
SG: 1) that kind of pushed buttons, 2) but it's also kind of an accurate thought process for being put under for the first time
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Story: She moved her groin directly over Trisha’s and started to grind into it.
SG: That escalated quickly :oP
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Story: chomp
SG: I don't know what word to replace this with, but it...definitely needs to be replaced :oP
(The word was not replaced and stayed in the story).
(SG’s Response while editing this: “i still maintain that it needed to be a different word, but its funnier seeing that it stayed in :oP” )
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Story: forgetting all the fun she had had this afternoon.
SG: Because irony is fun that way :oP