Regarding my absence

Hi everyone. You may have noticed that I have not been very active as of recently. Truth is that I am faced with a moral dilemma that has filled my mind with guilt and negative thoughts. Recently I found someone and things have gotten quite serious between us and she obviously doesn't know about my AI creations. I feel like I am living a double life. I am a very honest person and I don't want my relationship to be plagued by lies from the start. I love creating lewd images with AI and I always give it my all to improve them set after set. This obviously takes a lot of time and energy. I want all my sexual energy to be channeled towards that individual because staying after work everyday for two hours generating images of naked girls and then editing them honestly feels like I am cheating. This excludes all the work that goes into looking at inspirations, experimenting with poses and styles and AI models. I am bombarding my brain with porn on a daily basis which by itself is unsustainable let alone with a partner. Honestly I enjoy every second of it and it feels so rewarding chatting with you guys, creating your commissions and hearing your feedback. This is why I do all this and I regret nothing. Right now what I need to do is focus on the woman in front of me and take a break from the endless stream of naked anime women I look at a daily basis and cleanse my brain. The feeling of opening my laptop and being paranoid that my partner will find the hundreds of images of lewd anime girls that I have created is something I want to stop experiencing. I appreciate the support of every single one of you and I am so grateful that I have a community that shares my passion.

Here is what will happen going forward. For now I will still be doing your guys' commissions and I will make smaller sets and upload unreleased ones. As I said I need to focus my sexual energy elsewhere and cleanse my brain so I will be less active here and on twitter, but I will keep a consistent stream of content. I hope you guys understand. I cannot give you an answer about when I will return to creating larger posts like I have been now because this has become like a part time job for me and I cannot practice it living with someone else. I am very saddened because I really enjoy all this and we have created an amazing community here. I have so much ideas and so many plans I want to bring to fruition but I need to rid myself of the guilt and the double life.

I hope you understand and I apologize if this post was too much or too personal.

I am sorry for letting you down

TL;DR

I am in a relationship and I live with someone I want to focus my sexual energy towards and not lie to about my secret waifu generations. I want to rid my head of all the nudity on a daily basis. Still, I owe you a lot and I would absolutely love to continue creating commissions as I have been doing. Please don't stop messaging me your ideas, commissions will continue. When I feel better and figure it out I will return with full force and smaller sets. I will try to fill the gap with unreleased content.

-NN