"Honey? Seriously, are you seeing this? A big, fat...busty bear is lying on our lawn...and I kind of think she's coming on to me. Hon? Where are you?
Oh wait...you...honey, YOU'RE the bear?! This is...um...I didn't expect anything like this to ever happen. No, no, I wasn't about to start something when I thought you were just a random bear woman, I would never cheat on you. But now that I know it's you...I mean, wow. Wait, I mean, how is this even possible? What happened to you? You've really packed on a few pounds, here...no insult intended! A little extra winter weight is normal for bears, right?"