#953 The Deities’ Frolic After the Party – First Half

“Waaaaaaaah! Vulcaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!!!”

Such a scream from Brother Hephaestus is unheard of till now.

Ah, introductions art due belatedly—it is I, Hermes, the god of wisdom.

And here we art in the celestial realm.

Witnessing through the art of far-seeing the pulverization of Hephaestus’ prized giant robot by terrestrial forces.

...Er, it was reduced to nothing but splinters.

As expected of the mighty dragon Alexander.

All gods of heaven, earth, and sea united, and even multiplied tenfold, would perish in less than a second before his might.

Yet, it seems he lacks the ability to read the room.

“Ohhhhhh! Mine own Vulcan, mine own passion-fueled masterpieceeeeeee!!!”

Hephaestus is in tears, yet the ultimate dragon is not solely to blame, methinks.

As the saint pointed out, the robot’s capabilities were outrageously unmatched.

It was like taking on an empire with naught but a bow and arrow.

Such a cheat skill could hardly be denied!

It was as if an apex predator hunted novices in the bronze rank!

When one considers it as thus, Alexander’s intrusion was akin to the iron hammer of wrath from the organizers!

“Urk... I did not consider it well enough. I acted as a mere antagonist in the first act.”

Exactly.

Like a middling player in a hobby manga who underestimates the novice protagonist and gets thoroughly beaten, right?

“I shall reflect, yet this passion of mine cannot be contained! Even if the super dragon opposes me, I shall continue to craft super robots. To build, to destroy, and to build anew!”

Hephaestus burns with a mysterious passion...

Creating a robot that could defeat Alexander, eh? Frighteningly, it seems within the realm of possibility for him.

“Ha, sounds intriguing. Once it is done, let us decorate it with jewels and seals.”

Hmm? Who is that?

This frivolous, seemingly empty-headed female voice?

“Ta-da! I hath arrived!”

Geeeeeeeeeeh!

Th-Thou!

The goddess of beauty, Aphrodite, also known as Ishtar?!

Wherefore?! Wherefore art thou here?!

“Is there a need for a reason where I appear? I go where I wish, where I am needed.”

Silence! No one summoned thee!

Thou art naught but a walking harbinger of trouble! I heard of thy recent summoning to the mortal realm and remained ever vigilant, yet here art thou before us!

Were thou not banished back to thy familial home after angering thy sister goddess Ereshkigal?

Wherefore dost thou stand here as if nothing hath transpired?!

“It is because I escaped, obviously. To the sky of Shawshank!”

An escaped convictttttttttt!

I must contact the authorities, A.K.A. Ereshkigal, but blast it, I hath not exchanged LINE contacts with her!!!

“I was merely flying about, looking for something fun, when I spotted a strange robot. I thought to myself, ‘Ah, could this be the handiwork of Hephaestus?’ Boys do love their toys.”

Blast it. This wretched goddess hath turned that robot into a beacon for herself!

“Oh, forgive me. Doth thee take offense when I call them robots? Should I refer to them as Mobile Suits instead?”

Do not wield thy half-heard otaku knowledge so recklesslyyyyyyy!

But let me explain!

Wherefore do I, Hermes, dread this wretched goddess so?

There is no being more fearsome in our divine realm than her!

Zeus? Hera?

Nay, compared to this instigator couple, she is far more dangerous!

Especially to Hephaestus!

“Hello, Hephaestus dear, thy loving wife hath come to visit. Surely a real woman’s body is better than any doll, right?”

“Stay away from Brother, haaaaaaaaaaag!!!”

I could not help but cry out.

Yes, Ishtar.

Originally from another divine realm, she once dwelled in our world for a time.

She was known as Aphrodite or Venus at the time.

And indeed, she was formally wedded to a certain male deity of this world.

And who might that be?

It is none other than Brother Hephaestus..................!

“Behold the goddess who deigns to visit her beloved husband! Is it not diligently charming?” 

“Thy standards of diligence art astoundingly low!”

That bar is buried deep within the earth!

Allow me to continue!

Hephaestus, mine own brother, and this wretched goddess art united in matrimony.

Yet, a blissful matrimonial life was never to be.

For the cause lies squarely with this cursed goddess’ infidelity.

This self-proclaimed Goddess of Love and Beauty is wanton in her affections; upon spotting a man, she attempts to mount him — one might as well call her the Goddess of Lust.

Most grievously, her affairs with Velesares art the worst, and even that comparatively sensible god of the heavens has succumbed... ‘Tis a stark reminder that the more serious art often the most vulnerable.

“Oh, and doth thou have the right to speak so detachedly, Hermes?”

Ugh?!

“How fare our lovechild, Hermaphroditus?”

Th-This hag suddenly switched targets!

Curses!

Yes, it’s true! Even I, Hermes, the wise, was beguiled by her allure.

Ishtar, or as she calls herself, Aphrodite, has devoured the male gods of this realm one by one, turning almost all of us on Olympus into unwitting brothers-in-sin!!!

Ah, the horror to even speak of it!

Moreover, it’s a wonder she and Zeus, who also fancies every goddess, have no affair.

Perhaps they both have developed a sensor to detect such landmines, given their vast experience?

Yet the greatest victim is Hephaestus, legally wedded to this nefarious goddess.

A man of otaku disposition and shy with maidens, he was ill-suited to withstand such a boundlessly libertine wife — it was a pairing that seemed nothing short of harassment.

Thy very existence is a trauma to Hephaestus!!!

“Darling, it hath been a while! I desire an accessory adorned with one hundred and eight jewels!”

Cease thy requests the moment you meet with the gent!!!

Art thou well, Hephaestus?

Hast thou not wept in fear?!

“Who might thou be?”

See, he is so distressed he hath erased thee from memory!!!

“How cruel to forget! I am thy wife, Ishtar... Ah, must I say Aphrodite for thee to comprehend?”

“Mine own wife exists only in two dimensions.”

Brother Hephaestus is desperately averting his gaze from the past!

It is clear as day: the compatibility between the artisan Hephaestus and this pick-me gyaru Goddess Aphrodite, or Ishtar, is atrociously poor.

Alas, a gyaru kind to an otaku is but a fantasy!

Thus, with great ire, Hephaestus retaliated, and their marriage crumbled.

During one of Ishtar’s trysts, he netted her in the act, presenting irrefutable evidence of her infidelity.

Thanks to this, even Zeus and Hera, who had pushed for their marriage, could not object, and the divorce was successfully finalized.

Hephaestus does not silently suffer betrayal — that is what makes him truly admirable!

If only his ex-wife would cease her demands, all would be serene.

“Our love is not so flimsy as to be torn asunder by mere paper! As long as we truly love each other, we remain husband and wife!”

But was there ever any love to begin with?

To call such a wretched creature a ‘Goddess of Love’ suggests the world is amiss. It tempts one to believe in the theory of a fabricated reality by the Demiurge!

Hephaestus steadfastly retreats into his shell, trying to outlast the harlot, but this self-affirming vixen carelessly believes she is adored and invades personal boundaries without a second thought!

I wish to stop her, but I cannot! Mine own efforts art but a flick against the force of this goddess.

Calling her nemesis, Ereshkigal, would be best, but that requires contacting Velesares through LINE!

Does Velesares even have the leisure to assist?

Meanwhile, Hephaestus’ ego might just collapse!

Ah, is there no deity to deliver us from this plight?!

Nay, for we ourselves art the gods!