#941 Kid-Bragging Contest

A delightful celebration of Shichi-Go-San was upon us...

When suddenly, the skies of festivity turned suspiciously murky.

“Please hold on a moment.”

Stepping into the fray next is Lampeye, the Witch of Hellfire.

Partner to Hendra, famously known as the Mermaid King’s Right Hand, and still the most formidable warrior among the Mermaid Kingdom’s women.

While counted among the Six Witches, she may not match the former merprincess Platy, or the current Mermaid Queen Puffer in status, but she yields to no one in spirit.

“If we’re talking sheer talent, my daughter Halfmoon surely takes first place. She was born to Hendra of the renowned warrior Betta family, and myself, the most celebrated of the mermaid palace guards. Not only is she a proven prodigy in combat, but she’s also inherited Hendra’s renowned wisdom—she’s absolutely flawless!”

“Don’t brag just about being tough in a scrap! Junior and Norito carry the Saint’s blood! It’s thanks to this that even at their young age, they unmistakably exude grace…!”

The scene is becoming chaotic with parents proudly boasting about their children.

Everyone loves their own kids, we get it, but claiming they’re superior to others... how about that?

Sure, we all think our child is number one.

But there’s something special about being one-of-a-kind.

Isn’t it crucial for people to mutually acknowledge each other’s children as their respective number ones?

If such logic prevailed, there’d be no need for witches.

Three of the once-feared Six Mad Witches during their bachelorette days now argue over parental pride.

“Oooh… hey, Puffer. Loving your child is fine, but getting too heated is…!”

Puffer’s husband, Arowana, timidly interjects, but...

“Silence, hun! These are merfolk, subjects of the Mermaid King! We must uphold proper respect and hierarchy!”

“Yikes!”

Hendra, too, gently voices his opinion to his beloved wife.

“Hey, Lampeye... Given that your opponent is the queen and the current king’s sister, perhaps some decorum is in order…?”

“Forgive me, Lord Hendra. A mother has battles she cannot retreat from.”

“Okay...!”

Hendra backs down, likely due to the undeniable resolve in Lampeye’s tone.

A pitiful brigade of husbands who can’t restrain their wives.

...Me?

Could I possibly stop Platy?

That’s impossible, obviously!

But, you see, I’m not too worried—I still have my trump card, Junior.

Once overwhelmed by the infamous Horkosfon’s natto punchline, Junior now tops the charts at our farm for delivering the perfect punchline.

When the time comes, my little one will smooth everything over.

But just as I was resting easy, Veil had to show up.

“Haa... what a humiliating display. Humans squabbling over trivial differences in ability—it’s not good for Junior’s education!”

Veil, who has always doted on Junior, scoops him up and, somewhat miraculously, flaps around in human form, powered by her dragon strength.

“I’m going to play around with Junior for a bit. We’ll come back once things settle down!”

“Waaaahhh!!! Wait a minuteeeeeeeeee!”

My secret weapon! My lethal weapon is goneeeeeeeeeeeee!

...Darn it, I’m out of strategies.

We, the powerless men, have no means left to calm the raging wives.

...Wait a minute.

Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth, wife for a wife, right?

Luckily, we still have some ladies who can be called wives at the scene.

The Demon King’s wives, Lady Astres and Lady Glasya!

If they, from their unique vantage point outside the mermaid circle, could admonish the current combatants, surely these ladies would recognize their own unseemliness!

Come on, please, Lady Astres and Lady Glasya!!!

“Belzebia is cuter!”

“No, my Marine is absolutely the cuter one!”

It’s useless...!

Even here, a heated debate rages on about the cuteness of their daughters.

“As their father, they’re both the apple of my eye...!”

The Demon King gazes off into the distance.

But you know, those two ladies, sharing the same husband, are the first and second demon queens.

Polygamy is a system that comes with the territory for rulers, though it’s arguably less prone to disputes than the relationships among those mermaid wives.

Especially since, before becoming queens, both were members of the Heavenly Four.

They were rivals competing for glory, so even now that they’ve become family, sparks often fly.

“In case you didn’t knowwww! My little Marine can swing a steel club at age sevennnnn! She’s got a bright future ahead of herrrrrr!”

“What use is such brute strength to a Demon Princess?! As the king’s beautiful daughter, she should be learning ladylike decorum and table mannersssss!”

“That’s why you were underestimated even during your Heavenly One days!”

“I was NOT!”

The two queens get even more worked up.

And then, someone brave enough to step in between these feuding queens speaks up.

“Mother, stop fighting, please.”

“Ggghhhhh...!”

That voice belongs to little Marine, their daughter, who’s also holding her younger half-sister in her arms.

The infant is none other than Belzebia, the second demon princess born to Lady Astres.

These sisters are from different mothers.

“Mothers, please, get along—”

“Nghhh, fine, fine, fine! It hurts!”

The reason for such a scream is that little Marine has grabbed her mother’s arm and twisted it upwards.

Cradling her half-sister in one arm, and twisting her mother’s arm with the other.

Such is the legacy of the Demon King and Lady Glasya. Her powerhouse nature definitely brings another bean-loving powerhouse princess to mind.

Upon seeing her daughter, the First Demon Queen says...

“Oh, that’s clever of you, little Marine! It’s almost hard to believe you’ve got any of that gorilla lady’s blood. You’ll marry into any top noble family without a problem!”

“The problem is you, moms.”

“We’re terribly sorry!”

She’s strict with not just her biological mother but her stepmother as well.

Marine… I haven’t seen her for a while, but she’s grown up splendidly...!

“Once Belzebia grows up, she’ll be dumbfounded by you two bickering. If the royal household is at odds, it affects the entire country, as Lord Mamoru and Lord Lucife Focale say. Please act with the awareness of a queen!”

“YES!!!”

The daughter is scolding her mothers…?!

I know! If the other wives saw this scene, maybe they’d reflect on their own pettiness and lay down their weapons…!

Or so I thought...!

“That’s why my child is the best! Follow the merprincess’s decision!”

“And I’m the current Mermaid Queen! Know your place!”

“With all due respect, it’s not about status, but the attitude one has.”

They’re utterly unimpressed.

How shallow.

“Hmm... What a conundrum.”

To think this unsightly scene is being witnessed by Sugawara no Michizane himself... How embarrassing.

“In any era, the affairs of women are fierce anywhere in the world. Reminds me of Hojo Masako.”

Hojo Masako was from three hundred years after your time, you know?

Do you really know her?

No, it’s exactly because Sugawara no Michizane has watched over humanity for so long that I implore his help!

Please, save us!

You must have some strategies to break this deadlock after all this time!

“If I may be so bold... those ladies there.”

The way Michizane dives into that barrier-like feud among the three witches... and still calls them “ladies” with the dignity of a god.

“Competing to see who’s the best is futile. As they say, ‘The proud do not endure.’ Prosperity inevitably declines, no matter how high one climbs, the time comes when one grows old and fades,” he preaches most sensibly. “As proof… I, too, had my rise and fall in the capital.”

“...”

The three witches, now solemn…

“Yeah... Maybe we’ve been too caught up in the moment...”

“Living together in harmony is what’s important...”

“That was thoughtless of us...”

Indeed, words borne of experience have a different kind of convincing power.

That’s right—celebrating our children’s ability to embrace today with vigor matters more than any competition.

That’s what Shichi-Go-San is all about.

Thanks to Sugawara no Michizane for reminding us.

That’s the god overseeing Shici-Go-San for you.

Huh? What do you mean he’s not?