#825 Shutting Down a Workaholic
Added 2023-11-20 17:00:19 +0000 UTCPresident the Lifeless King.
In some ways, the most terrifying opponent stood before me.
Have I ever felt such fear since coming here?
But! I’m determined to avert the crisis facing this world.
It’s my responsibility, having carelessly spoken of labor and summoned this economic behemoth to our farm.
“President, President...!”
“What is it?! An order for our company?! Our company covers everything from toilet cleaning to meteorite demolition!”
That’s one heck of a range for services covered...
Don’t be overwhelmed, self.
Times have changed. The era of simply working hard during high economic growth is over. With the Bubble Economy and the Employment Ice Age over, the world seeks new work styles.
I am a child of those times.
That’s why I’m confident I’ll win this battle.
It’s the usual modern knowledge showdown!
New ideas must drive out old ones!
My advanced thinking will break the old generation’s rigid values!
Let’s go!
“Um... Mr. President, are you familiar with something called the Labor Standards Act?”
“I know of it, but so what?”
Yes, the Labor Standards Act, the ally of all workers.
According to it, you shouldn’t make people work more than 40 hours a week... and more than eight hours a day!
Isn’t your labor policy violating this?!
“Hahaha, what are you talking about? That’s the law of a bygone world. It’s utterly meaningless here.”
“Ngh!”
“Besides, we are already dead, so no laws governing the living apply to us.”
“Nghhhhh...!”
It didn’t work!
The President is unexpectedly well-versed in theory and can’t be easily rebutted!
My enemy is tougher than I imagined...!
But I haven’t lost yet! I must gather my wits and try a different approach.
“…President, after you left, something called ‘workstyle reform’ was happening in that world.”
“I see! A reform to work longer and harder. Right!!!”
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
It’s the opposite. The opposite.
It’s about working more flexibly and taking time off, like going home early!
“Such a bizarre thing to say. There’s nothing to do even if you go home, right?”
“Whaaa?!”
“Surely, working is a better use of time.”
“Well, uh... There’s also this remote work system, where you can work from home...”
“Why not just live at the workplace?”
Yikes, this Lifeless King is fundamentally different from ordinary folks!
Did Japan experience such miraculous rapid growth in the early Showa era because it was full of people like him?
“All right, I’ve got something important to say... Mr. President, your way of thinking... it’s what makes up a so-called black company!”
“Bl-Blaaaaack?!”
Gotcha!
Even the President should be shaken by this, right...?!
“Black... Black, as in the color that surpasses gold and platinum in credit cards. The ultimate sign of superiority...! So, my company is recognized as a top-tier corporation?!”
“Huh?”
Perceptions of color change from place to place.
Black does have a luxury image, doesn’t it?!
Credit cards, it seems, range from regular types to gold, platinum, and black cards.
I don’t know much about it since I’ve never had one, though.
Does the President, a corporate warrior, only understand the value of colors in terms of credit cards?!
Could it be that ‘black companies’ sound luxurious because of the word ‘black’...?!
...No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
That was close. I was almost brainwashed there!
Truly terrifying.
“The President sure is fearsome. Even Lord Saint can’t tame him...”
“Nobody can persuade the President. In his world, work is the highest form of justice.”
Both Sensei and Belphgamilia are looking at us with a sense of resignation!
Wait, don’t give up on me, you two!
I can still do this! I must!
“Ah, I’ve created a company song for the upcoming enterprise. Would you care to listen?”
“Eh?”
Without waiting for my reply, he starts humming an acapella rhythm.
“♪Joyful, joyful, even on holidays, the zombies... receive no pay at all♪”
“Stop!!!”
The parody vibe is one thing, but the lyrics are just terrible.
This President, who finds joy only in work, is way too dangerous.
At this point, I have no choice but to contain him by any means necessary.
But how can I subdue him?
I’ve never encountered someone so formidable as a workaholic born in early Showa, Japan.
Born in the Showa era?
Ah.
I’ve got an idea.
“Mr. President, Mr. President! Look at th-th-th-this!”
“Yes? What is it?”
“Please look at this!!!”
Before him, I present...
A kotatsu!
“A ko- kokokokokokokoko...kotatsuuuuu?!”
It worked.
For someone born and raised in the Showa era, the allure of a kotatsu is unmistakable!
Its magic is irresistible, even for a Showa corporate warrior who refuses rest!!!
I never thought the kotatsu I made the other day would come in handy like this.
Life sure is full of surprises.
“Ooh? Oooooh...!”
“All right, time for a follow-up attack! Take this, a heap of oranges!!!”
I place a basket full of oranges on the kotatsu table.
Can the President resist this two-pronged assault?!
“The kotatsu... The kotatsu!!! I’d slip into a kotatsu after returning from cold sales calls, savoring its warmth...!”
Like a salaryman who’s not allowed to drink during work, the President shows a touch of sorrow...
He tentatively slips his feet into the kotatsu.
Despite his hesitation, he couldn’t resist its calling.
The inside is warm, thanks to the magic stones generating mild heat. His feet must be trembling in comfort as if he’s returned to the warmth of his childhood home.
The President, now just a skeleton, feels the kotatsu’s warmth even more directly.
In the Showa era, where there were no halogen heaters or electric carpets, there was no resisting the divine kotatsu!
“Foohhh?! Ohhh...! The warmth of this kotatsu! This compactness! It’s like returning to the comfort of my mother’s womb...!”
After thoroughly enjoying the kotatsu’s warmth, I soon heard the President’s steady snoring.
Undead don’t need sleep, but they can if they want to.
“Now’s our chance! Sensei, please!”
“Understood.”
The President is whisked away by Sensei’s forced teleportation magic, kotatsu included.
His destination is the sandy dunes where he originally resided.
Once he wakes up, he’ll likely return to his job of counting sands in the dunes.
“Phew, that was close...!”
“If he had gone out into the world, our economic society might have seriously collapsed.”
That man was truly terrifying, potentially capable of destroying our world.
His reputation is surely on par with Sensei, the Professor, and the Sage.
“...Too much of anything isn’t good for humans.”
That’s what I thought after encountering the President.
Working is good, but everything should have a limit.
After all, the most important thing since coming to this world is to relax.
I’ll take this encounter as a lesson and run my farm leisurely without worrying about working environments.
