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dinniman

dinniman

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Chapters 142 + Epilogue A

(Make sure you've read 140 and 141 first! I'm posting them at the same time as this chapter!)

Chapter 142

<Note added by Crawler Porthus, 2nd Edition> I don’t know why this journal came to me, but I don’t feel it will ever be enough. I have done my best, adding little things here and there to the meager, mostly-useless recipes. How many generations before this book truly has enough information to make a difference? Too many, I fear.

...

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Chapters 140 and 141

(Too many words for one post. This is 140 and 1

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Chapters 138 and 139

Chapter 138

<Crawler Sinjin. 15th Edition> I now worship the goddess Kuraokami. Worst decision ever. The goddess is sponsored by some male soother twat who is treating it like I really worship him. They made this whole system more complicated than it needs to be. If you see a god or if you find a temple or if you find a scroll of prayer, you’re given the option to worship a god. Once you do it, there’s a pawful of benefits but also a bunch of rules you gotta follo...

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Chapters 136 and 137

Chapter 136

Ti

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Chapters 134 and 135

(There's yet another cliffhanger at the end of this, but that's gonna be name of the game from here on out until we're done with this floor.)


Chapter 134

I clambered toward the door of the bridge as the music started to pulse. It was quiet at first, but it rose in volume, shaking the hull. And soon enough, the music was blasting. Not quite the level of an alarm trap, but loud enough I had to shout at the others.

This was a pure, deep dubstep growl punctuated by high-pit...

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Chapter 133

(Cliffhanger warning. Sorry in advance)

I opened the pocket watch and set off the alarm in hopes that Henrik would respond. I had my ink quill ready to write him a note, but he didn’t answer. He hadn’t replied since that first time. I relayed this to Juice Box via Langley. He said she was concerned about her brother, so much so that she was about to go in there herself. I told him to try and talk her out of it.

Meanwhile, the tomb raider guys had finally started moving toward...

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Chapters 131 and 132

Chapter 131

Stage 4 of 4.

The Necropolis of Anser

One morning, back when Bea and I first moved in together, I decided to make pancakes. Bea was still asleep, and I thought it’d be a nice thing to do since she’d been doing most of the cooking.

I was still getting used to the idea of sharing a home with a woman and a cat, and there was a lot I didn’t know. Even though I had known Donut since she was a kitten, I’d...

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Chapter 130

Chapter 130

I peered down the stairs, and I examined the slow-moving ooze. The closer it got to the top, the slower it went. I realized the thinner it stretched itself, the more difficult it was for it to move.

The thing looked like a god had sneezed over the stairwell, and the mucus pile had rolled in kitty litter. Some of the magazines that Donut had knocked off the table along with some other junk items from the lab were mixed in with the creature, hitching a ride up the stairs...

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Choose your form of destruction.

Question.

If you are, hypothetically, in a giant bubble, and a massive kaiju-like monster that is almost the same size as the bubble itself is suddenly summoned, what form would you like it to take?

I actually had several more ideas for this, but I took a few off so I can use them later at a more manageable size. 

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Chapter 129

Apologies in advance for the minor cliffhanger at the end of this. Chapter 130 is almost done and will be posted in a few days.

Chapter 129

Donut, Mongo, and I scrambled to follow Katia through the electrified doorway and into the hallway made out of glass.

Entering the Sand Castle of the Mad Dune Mage.

Zzzzt. I cringed as the door vanished behind me. The walls didn’t collapse, but the doorway disappeared. We were now stuck in the castle. ...

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Chapter 128

Chapter 128

Time to Level Collapse: 4 Days and 22 Hours

The entire top half of the house was gone. It looked as if a group of blindfolded and drunk beavers had decided to do a remodel job. They’d ripped the top floor and the attic away, haphazardly decapitating the home about six inches below the first floor’s ceiling, which meant all of the rooms on the first floor were open to the elements. The tops of the walls were jagged and splintered. The fireplace and ...

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Chapter 127

Chapter 127

It only took the repair sub about thirty seconds to mend the damage. The moment it was fixed, Donut and I teleported away. But when we jumped, we did not return to our personal space. That did not surprise me.

Our destination, however, did.

Entering the Desperado Club.

We were in a small room with a desk. The paper-covered desk was occupied by a tall man. The shadowy figure wore a dark cloak with a hood, which supernaturally obscured his fa...

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Chapter 126

Chapter 126

Carl: I have some things cooking on my sapper’s table. Let me take care of them really quick before you transfer us.

Loita: Hurry up, Carl. The Veriluxx crew is paying for a rental trailer.

I rushed across the street to the closest pub and entered our personal space. I did, indeed, have two sets of smoke curtains infusing in potions. Ever since I’d read about the idea in the cookbook, I’d b...

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Chapter 125

Chapter 125

Stage 3 of 4.

The Mad Dune Mage

Time to Level Collapse: 10 Days and 4 Hours

Views: 17.72 Quintillion
Followers: 13 Quadrillion
Favorites: 4.1 Quadrillion

“I did all that sewing for nothing?” Katia said as we stepped out the front door of the house. She and the others were waiting for us. I came out and shook hands with Landry and the other archers. Louis and Firas were also ...

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Chapter 124

I quickly examined the small girl’s properties. Her dot was white on the map.

Bonnie – Dirigible Gnome. Juvenile. Level 5.

Little Bonnie only loves two things in this world. Her pet pig Sausage and getting what she wants.

The only daughter of Commandant Kane, a case can be made that she’s the true leader of the Wasteland. It is said that when Sausage was captured and held as ransom by ...

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Chapter 123

“So,” I said to Juice Box. “Henrik is your brother?”

She nodded. “He’s what we call a Principal. People say they’re a cult, obsessed with cataloging all known species. But that’s not true. They’re looking for just one. And they think they’ve found it.”

Donut: LONELYYETI43 SAYS I HAVE THE PRETTIEST FUR PATTERN SHE HAS EVER SEEN. SHE ALSO SAYS SHE’S GETTING A TATTOO OF ME ON HER LOWER THORAX.

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Chapter 122

I stared up at the level 35 creature as the children all moved off. He towered over me, standing at least seven and a half feet tall. I examined his properties.

Crawler #324,116. “Chris Andrews 2”
Level 35.
Race: Igneous.
Class: Zulu Warrior.

Every time he moved, it sounded like rocks scraping together. I could feel the heat coming off him, like the center of his body was molten. He’d probably set Donut’s heat vision haywire. Chris returned my gaz...

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Chapter 121

Instead of meeting up with the others in the Bactrian ruins, we limped our way back to Hump Town. Above, dozens of airplanes and airships continued to angrily harass the air defenses of the city, but without the threat of high-altitude bombardment, the multiple anti-air guns were equal to the task. The gnomes were on borrowed time. Some were already landing on the far side of the bowl. I noted that several were flying up and above the lip of the bowl and then disappearing, presumably to seek ...

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Dungeon Crawler Carl Christmas Special 2020!

"The Ballad of Gravy Boat." 

Note: You do not need to be caught up to understand what's going on in this story, but I recommend not reading until after you've read book two. That's through chapter 73. Most of you guys are well past that point.  

“We all want happy endings,” Sadir said to the creature in the cage. It looked back at him sullenly. He knew the animal couldn’t understand him. “But sometimes, my little friend, we don’t ge...

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Chapters 119 & 120

Chapter 119

Once I was alone with Donut in the crafting room, I spent a quick minute to open my new loot boxes. I only had two. The silver boss box I’d gotten for killing Ruckus the chicken hawk contained two items. First was a case of 25 more surefires, which was a relief. I’d already used up ten of the ones I’d received earlier, giving the missiles the “guided” upgrade. I was about to use the rest of the ones I already had, and this gave us some wiggle room. I could now alte...

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Chapter 118

Chapter 118

Stage 2 of 4.

Still on the gnomes.

“So Chris is from team Meadow Lark?” Katia asked. “He entered the dungeon with Imani and Elle?”

“Yes,” I said as we drove back to Hump Town. We’d looted everything we could from the wreckage. It was a lot, including almost a ton of dwarfish aluminum, which was a light but strong metal. The giant buzzsaw was powered by the same type of dwarfish battery that ran the Chariot. I ...

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Chapters 115, 116, and 117

Chapter 115

Ne

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Chapters 113 and 114

Chapter 113

The announcement came and went. There was nothing of significance. She spoke of the doubling of bounties for those who’d been on the list. She reminded us that sponsorship bidding was underway. There was a warning that just because we were outside that we shouldn’t use the big, wide world as a bathroom and that there were restrooms in the towns. But if we had to go while we were outside, they wouldn’t penalize us. We needed to announce that we were g...

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Chapter 112

It didn’t take long to build the rickety, compartmental vehicle. Thanks to the engineering and metalworking benches, I could fabricate anything I needed in minutes. The second-level engineering table was great for complicated designs that required multiple objects put together, like the front suspension system and drive shaft. The level two metalworking table allowed me to view the tensile strength and load limits, and the interface had more shaping options. Mordecai said once we got that t...

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Chapter 111

Chapter 111

“Okay, here’s what we gotta do,” I said after I finished my training. “Step one is to find all the other crawlers and make sure we’re all on the same page. Step two is to figure out who they have locked up in the town hall. It’s probably the gnome leader guy’s kid or something.”

“Maybe it’s his pet,” Donut said. “Nobody wants to bomb their pet. What eats mushrooms?”

“Lots of things,” Mordecai said. “And we should find out where the...

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Chapter 110

The first thing Donut did was bounce over to the mailbox and grab her spellbook-of-the-floor club prize as we headed toward our personal space.

“Maybe it’ll be a flying spell,” Katia muttered.

“We won’t be so lucky,” I said.

We did, however, have three very rich sponsors amongst us, and we were about to receive three more. I hated, absolutely hated, having to depend on them for help, but I was at a loss as to what we were going to do.

“What’s the point ...

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Chapter 109. Welcome to the Fifth Floor.

Part 5

Chapter 109

Phase One of Four. The Gnomes.

Time to level Collapse: 15 Days.

Views: 1.43 Quintillion
Followers: 7 Quadrillion
Favorites: 2.4 Quadrillion

Leaderboard rank: 3
Bounty: 800,000 gold

Welcome, Crawler to the fifth floor. “The Siege Engines”

Sponsorship bidding initiated on Crawler #4...

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Chapter 108 - Epilogue


Loita stood atop the table that normally contained our snacks in the production trailer. She looked very much like Zev, but maybe a little taller and thinner. She did not wear the deep-diver suit but instead had a simple, rebreather-like device around her fish neck. She stood in a puddle of brackish-smelling water. A shiny, blinking pin sat on her breast area. It was the dahlia-like symbol for the Bloom, I knew. I tried to commit it to memory. I was no artist like Katia, but after ...

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Chapters 105, 106, 107 - The End of the Iron Tangle

Chapter 105

Time to Level Collaps

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Chapters 103 and 104

Chapter 103

The first thing we did was walk out to the main restaurant. Mordecai, who was somehow even more soaked with gore than I was, approached the counter with the Bopca.

“We are purchasing a personal space upgrade,” Mordecai said. “A cleaner bot.”

The upgrade cost 25,000 gold, making it one of the least expensive environmental upgrades we could get. That was still expensive as shit, but none of us complained. Donut didn’t even try to negotiate. Katia wordless...

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