[Edited] Ch. 48-49
Chapter 48 - Building Lynnria
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I
2024-01-05 02:57:03 +0000 UTC View Post
Chapter 46 - Art Appreciation
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Oscar? Come in, Oscar.
< static >
We’re sure this thing is working?
…?
Maybe? Don’t tell me, maybe! Does nothing on this blasted station— Ugh… Pick up the comms, Oscar. I know you can hear me.
< crackling static, possibly a garbled reply >
Ah ha! Now look, Oscar. What happened with Ms. Mange was undeniably tragic, but you are hardly g...
2023-12-29 17:04:45 +0000 UTC View PostThere are times when I quite enjoy rereading my
2023-12-27 23:02:52 +0000 UTC View PostI had to rework this one pretty extensively. The main thrust is there, but I really needed some more explanation for why Jax and Arx took to Lynnria so quickly. Hopefully it reads well.
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“Not that I’m complaining, Lynnria,” I murmured sleepily, “but I only get my Life Energy secondhand. You’d probably get more out of this by feeding from one of the others.”
Lynnria pulled herself up from my thoroughly moistened—and aching—flag pole just l...
2023-12-26 23:46:26 +0000 UTC View PostSo, I had planned to get this portion dropped y
2023-12-20 21:27:02 +0000 UTC View Post
In loving memory of
Samantha Aete Mange
May you live in our hearts forever.
Hmm… I think that should be fine enough. It’s short, sweet, and to the point. Anything more would be… extravagant for someone with such a minor role here. You have to remember, Timothy, the vast majority of the audience won’t have heard of the girl. If we carry on about it too much… well, the last thing ...
2023-12-15 17:33:23 +0000 UTC View PostBefore the dust had even settled, I began rattling off the Words to Unclothe the Darkness. Arx had been performing admirably to facilitate our escape despite the lack of light through a combination of natural gifts and experience, but she would have next to no chance in a melee. Lynnria and I, none at all. We needed our eyes.
And for good measure, I added Efficacy in the Gloom to the mix, though I doubted it would help. Against a wooden juggernaut like this, accuracy was going to be the...
2023-12-13 22:28:27 +0000 UTC View PostAdded a bit of extra foreshadowing for the cutoff scene that happens later in the chapter. Kind of came out of nowhere previously.
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As Arx bolted for the door, I immediately thought to warn her of the floor hazard, however I was still too out of it to do much of anything save wince as her foot came down on the pressure plate. The resultant dart appeared with a thwick at her ankle as if by magic, delivering its payload of corrosive poison.
I felt her...
2023-12-12 23:35:16 +0000 UTC View PostI stood as though transfixed, my gaze locked with her own.
It was almost funny—in a morbid sort of way. While her eyes had been closed, Arx might well have been no different from the crystalline stone she was imprisoned within. A beautiful work of art perhaps, but no less cold and lifeless for it.
Yet now… now she was suddenly alive and well. Conscious.
It was such a simple thing, that acknowledgment of one mind to another. That faint brush between windows to the soul. 2023-12-11 22:34:51 +0000 UTC View Post
Lots of clarification in this chapter, particularly at the end with the puzzle reveal.
Meanwhile, in my life, had the final run of 'The Christmas Story' this weekend up at the community theater. But it got cut short on Saturday right during intermission. Believe it or not, the theater caught fire! Had to evacuate and everything. Nobody was hurt. Still, exciting stuff!
We think it was faulty wiring. It was a really old building, and the place has never had much of a budget. Lots of...
2023-12-11 21:39:31 +0000 UTC View PostMan. My editor got really up in arms about how vague the dream sequence got in this chapter. I know he doesn't like the reader having the possibility of being confused, but I'm standing my ground on this one. You're supposed to be confused! It's only supposed to make sense after the fact.
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I stared at the single slab of jerky between my fingers for some time, my face flat. If there is a word that simultaneously describes both unparalleled disappointment...
2023-12-07 22:22:20 +0000 UTC View PostRead along and check editor's notes with the attachment.
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Our expressions of joy at having finally discovered the treasure rapidly dissolved into ones of confusion and disappointment. Beneath the lovely fabric of the throw was hidden a worn and rotting trunk. Its hinges and buckles were rusted. Its black, leather exterior was cracked, and bits of it were beginning to flake away. Against the backdrop of so much opulence, the contrast was striking.
Worse, atop it...
2023-12-06 22:38:45 +0000 UTC View Post
< Ping! >
Metallic sphere jerks violently then falls to the ground with a large, smoking hole pierced through it.
< Extended silence >
Small herd of confused Tyranno-taurs slowly wander off.
Sigh… well, I suppose I ought congratulate you Geoffrey. That was an excellent shot. And from orbit no less. The way things have been going, I don’t dou...
2023-12-06 02:52:31 +0000 UTC View PostFor several minutes, I just laid there. The adrenaline spike I had suffered combined with far too little sleep, far too little food, and far… far too much unexplained bullshit had triggered a state of thoughtless limbo.
Sometimes, the world just gets to be too much and my brain will switch off for a few minutes. I will stare at a random corner of a table, apparently deep in thought, but really I am just letting my eyes focus and unfocus to play with the double images. It can ...
2023-12-06 01:05:20 +0000 UTC View PostLook for ch 32 here in an hour or two. It's done, but I need to do a quick review. And If I make it, ch 10 of The Human Experiment should drop today. Getting pretty tired though.
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Lynnria peered around the corner cautiously.
All around us, there was nothing but black and the glowing outlines of a seemingly endless maze. With my dark-vision spell, the place sort of reminded me of one of those early 3d video games where they only had the one color to work with, and ...
2023-12-06 00:12:41 +0000 UTC View PostAlmost 700 new words to this chapter.
And this marks the halfway point to the developmental edit phase. Whoo!
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Three by three by three.
In yellow. In blue. In green.
Six for one. Seven for two. Eight for me.
In light. In dark. In between.
Three by three by three.
“What do you think it means?” Lynnria asked.
I hesitated in answering, instead opting to reread the note just to be certain I had not missed anything.
...
2023-12-01 22:38:34 +0000 UTC View PostI returned to consciousness slowly, the fragments of some strange dream spinning off to the corners of my mind. I still rather vividly remembered something about a bunch of hovering pink pyramids in the sky. Then things had taken a bizarre turn, and I seemed to recall getting hot and heavy with Ahnbe of all people… while Mia watched.
Which was kind of odd, because I had no idea what the Goddess even looked like. Dreams can be funny that way, though. The subconscious often seems to hav...
2023-11-30 21:24:02 +0000 UTC View PostSo, today I am both heavily medicated and sleep deprived from catching some respiratory infection from all the kids I've been doing this play with. Also, opening night is this week, so we've been rehearsing like fiends. Which is to say, I may have missed one or two things this time.
Added a short little bit where Lynnria is recalling a bit of her past. Just a paragraph, but it gives you a little something more about where she comes from.
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“An Engraver...
2023-11-29 22:35:50 +0000 UTC View Post“You’re sure?”
Lynnria dipped her head to one side. “What choice do I have?”
I stared at her incredulously for a moment before pointing to the ground. “You… you could stay here.”
That was what a sane person would have done. But I never seemed to meet any of those.
“But my grandfather…”
My head wobbled somewhere around a yeah-but. “I’m sure he would be more upset you decided to risk your life just to see him one last tim...
2023-11-28 22:53:30 +0000 UTC View PostThese are the chapters in which we finally star
2023-11-27 21:38:49 +0000 UTC View PostBeen a tad busy with Thanksgiving and all. Got the chapter from yesterday done, but didn't have time to post after. So... Thanksgiving double feature?
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<23 - I Dream of Stats>
I have always considered myself a fairly decent swimmer. I was no fish or anything, but I had spent plenty of time as a kid at the public pool. It had been a while since then, but I was still fairly confident I could manage.
That said, there is a quite literal ocea...
2023-11-23 18:06:15 +0000 UTC View PostRereading this one was a lot more fun that I thought it would be. Don't know if that's the consensus, but I actually enjoyed the thought process behind figuring out the traps and puzzles.
Mostly changes in word choice here. Making the jokes hit a little harder, etc.
original in the attachments, as usual.
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My first reaction after reading the letter was to scoff at how insultingly ridiculous it was. I was cordially invited as a welcome guest, yet I had to j...
2023-11-21 22:06:39 +0000 UTC View PostFor a long while, I sat there watching as the sun slowly crawled its way over the horizon. The Stele stood at my back. The winds were bitter and cold, and I could see some dark clouds gathering off to my left. It would probably rain today. Or snow. It was cold enough for that, I felt sure.
I shivered.
Icing on the cake, really. Icing on the epic shit-cake the last twenty-four hours had turned into. I felt numb. Chewed and spit out like a wad of forgotten tobacco on the sidewalk. 2023-11-20 23:07:10 +0000 UTC View Post
Hey, this one wasn't so bad! Go past me!
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Bline—or whoever she was—looked at me in shock for a half-second before snorting into her teacup. Tea shot up and over the edge, splattering everywhere. Including her fancy, white ball gown.
I had to wince. That dress looked tremendously expensive. Though, given the kind of magicks I had already seen her wield, I doubted a bit of spilled tea would present much of a challenge to her.
She hastily set her teacup a...
2023-11-17 23:42:25 +0000 UTC View Post
Yes... the picture is cursed. But I couldn't resist sharing Trannnnnnnasus Rex with you. lol
I think I may have broken the poor AI's brain with 'Tyrannosaurus Rex centaur.'
Also, so sorry this chapter has taken so long. Between editing and the play I'm doing up at the community theater, I've had next to no time for creative writing. I'm playing 'the old man' in the Christmas Story musical. 2023-11-17 17:35:24 +0000 UTC View Post
This one was kind of weird to read. There were several spots where I had to roll my eyes over how wordy I can get sometimes, but there were others where I had to nod, impressed with myself.
Anyway, I spent a good while cutting down a lot of the chaff. Hopefully it reads better than before.
Ciao!
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To my great relief, we did manage the journey to the Stele of the Fourth Creation before sunrise, though that meant a seven-hour trek—so Arx’...
2023-11-16 20:41:40 +0000 UTC View PostWoo! An easy one finally! Just a few touch ups to this one. Though, I did have to change the one or two minor points.
See attachment for editorial notes.
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I stood stock still for a handful of breaths while terror raced its way up and down my spine.
I could not say I was particularly familiar with that voice. I had only heard it the once, after all. It had been a faint, breezy sort of thing, scarcely a gust of wind—nothing like the barely c...
2023-11-15 17:01:55 +0000 UTC View PostLuckily, we ended up passing a weapon shop as we approached the arena, so we stopped in to pick up a couple of ready-made items. Arx bought a pair of scimitars, and I went ahead and got myself a decent round shield. It was not quite so big as the last one, and consequently, it was far less heavy. Regardless, I felt much safer to once again have that slight margin of hand-held protection. And conveniently, there were a couple of loose straps attached to one side so that I could wear it across ...
2023-11-14 21:50:58 +0000 UTC View Post