theralphreport

THE RALPH REPORT for Monday, March 13th, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : We look at last night's OSCARS telecast! Eddie battles an ARMY of THOUSANDS! And, our MUNCHIN' MONDAY taste-test of some of the newest PEEPS flavors!

THE RALPH REPORT for Friday, March 10th, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : The GARMY raises money to help the HOMELESS! Beware the WHISKEY FUNGUS! And, you could win The Garmy Game Show: OSCARS EDITION!

DRAWN IN 60 SECONDS!

"Ralph vs Cocaine Bear" for the rest of the stash!

WHO WILL WIN?!

THE RALPH REPORT for Thursday, March 9th, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : Two Shakespearean actors have a DEADLY BEEF! Today's Sex U. class: "Why do MUSICIANS get all the chicks?!" And, Ralph MAY have had a few cocktails before the SHOW!

THE RALPH REPORT for Wednesday, March 8th, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : We've got an electric ONE-HIT WONDER! JOE SCHMO gets JURY DUTY! Beware the WEREWOLVES! And, you can drink just like TED LASSO!

It's a FOUR-STAR party in the Batcave!

Hey, FOUR-STARS Generals!

You're invited to the Batcave to watch us record TRR live!

Wednesday, March 8th, 2023 at 7pm (PST)!

JOIN US!

The Ralph-ffle for THIS WEEK!

YOU could be the owner of Eddie's portrait of "Hambo: The Canadian SUPER PIG"!

Just make a donation to help reduce HUNGER AND HOMELESSNESS by giving to HOPE OF THE VALLEY RESCUE MISSION. 

(Or a simliar charity in your community.)

HOPE OF THE VALLEY's mission is to prevent, reduce and eliminate poverty, hunger and homelessness. They do this by offering immediate assistance and l...

THE RALPH REPORT for Tuesday, March 7th, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : The TEN baby names that are DYING OUT! Arnold goes TERMINATOR on bigots! And, we celebrate the legend of ZORRO!!!

MUNCHIN' MONDAY: Celery Soda?!

Why is this a thing?

And, what does it taste like?!

All will be answered!

THE RALPH REPORT for Monday, March 6th, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : Ralph's adventures in SKIN CANCER! How much money would it take for you to do PORN?! And, why is there CELERY SODA?!

THE RALPH REPORT for Friday, March 3rd, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : Steve Ashton's UK UPDATE! The GARMY raises money to FIGHT MS! Remakes from the VIDEO VAULT! And, the GARMY GAME SHOW asks, "DO YOU KNOW YOUR BEARS?!"

Today's DRAWN IN 60 SECONDS by Eddie Pence!

Beware the dangerous ... CANADIAN SUPER PIG!

THE RALPH REPORT for Thursday, March 2nd, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : Wild adventures in SELF-PLEASURE! A new DRAWN IN 60 SECONDS! And, the sad origin story of PORKY PIG!

THE RALPH REPORT for Wednesday, March 1st, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : HAPPY MARCH! What ONE-HIT WONDER began as a song about a serial killer?! Meet the world's most DANGEROUS cheese! And, we explore the history of the CHEF'S KISS!

FOUR-STAR GENERALS! Come WATCH US LIVE!

All FOUR-STAR generals are cordially invited to join us in the Batcave! 

Enjoy us recording The Ralph Report LIVE!

It's the FOUR-STAR WATCH-A-PALOOZA!

Wednesday, March 1st, 2023 at 7pm! (PST)

This week's RALPH-FFLE!

YOU could be the owner of Eddie's artistic rendering of EDDIE AND THE SEX MACHINE!

Just make a donation to help battle MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS!

Multiple sclerosis is a disabling disease of the brain and spinal cord. In MS , the immune system attacks the protective sheath that covers nerve fibers and causes communication problems between your brain and the rest of your body.

Help fight this awful disease by giving to the WalkMS ev...

THE RALPH REPORT for Tuesday, February 28th, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : This TV TUNES TUESDAY is painless! Will our tongues be TWISTED? And, finally, your chance to MAKE OUT with your PHONE!

MUNCHIN' MONDAY: Faygo AND Peeps Pepsi!

It's a Munchin' Monday SODAFEST!

We test the merits of FAYGO AND the new PEEPS PEPSI!

We drink it all ... so you don't have to.

THE RALPH REPORT for Monday, February 27th, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : Beware the CANADIAN SUPER PIGS! Don't swallow a PLASTIC BABY! And, we give PEEPS PEPSI the "Munchin' Monday" Taste Test!

THE RALPH REPORT for Friday, February 24th, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : Steve Ashton's UK UPDATE! The Happiest GARMY GAME SHOW On Earth! A stormy VIDEO VAULT! The GARMY raises money to help earthquake victims! And, what's better: Mini KISS or Maxi KISS?!

The THREE & FOUR STAR Virtual Cocktail Party!

Let's PARTY!

Inviting all the THREE & FOUR STAR generals to join us for a virtual COCKTAIL party on Sunday, February 26th, 2023 at 12:00 (NOON) PST!

We'll hang, chat, and answer your questions!

Come join us!

The latest DRAWN IN 60 SECONDS!

Here it is ... EDDIE & THE SEX MACHINE!

THE RALPH REPORT for Thursday, February 23rd, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : What's the origin of "Boobs for Beads"? The magic of THE RUTLES! And, Godzilla laid an EGG?! 

THE RALPH REPORT for Wednesday, February 22nd, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : Steve Ashton's UK UPDATE! (Yes, it's ASH(ton) WEDNESDAY!) Eddie goes to WAR with a WHOLE COUNTRY! And, we've got an ANGELIC "One-Hit Wonder" for you!

WATCH US LIVE, FOUR-STAR GENERALS!

All FOUR-STAR generals are cordially invited to join us in the Batcave to enjoy us recording The Ralph Report LIVE!

It's the FOUR-STAR WATCH-A-PALOOZA!

Wednesday, February 22nd, 2023 at 7pm! (PST)

The TRR Ralph-ffle for "Hip Hop Ralph"!

It pains me to let this one go, but YOU could be the owner of Eddie's artistic rendering of HIP HOP RALPH!

Just make a donation to help the victims of the earthquakes in Turkey and Syria via DIRECT RELIEF!

Direct Relief is a humanitarian organization, active in all 50 states and more than 80 countries, with a mission to improve the health and lives of people affected by disasters.

Nongovernmental, nonsectarian, and not-for-p...

THE RALPH REPORT for Tuesday, February 21st, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : We have an emergency TV TUNES TUESDAY! Plus, "No one dies at DISNEYLAND!" A musical TONGUE TWISTER! And, HAPPY MARDI GRAS! Who wants BEADS?!

A message from Ralph ...

And, today's MUNCHIN' MONDAY: Peruvian Ceviche!

DRAWN IN 60 SECONDS: Hip Hop Ralph!

Eddie captures Ralph back in his poppin' and lockin' days!

THE RALPH REPORT for Friday, February 17th, 2023

On today's THE RALPH REPORT : Steve Ashton's UK UPDATE! The "Sex Symbol" edition of the GARMY GAME SHOW And, the glorious GARMY raises big money for Variety, the children's charity!