thehardtimes

Fanboys: Political Smut

On this week’s embarrassingly off-schedule episode of Fanboys, the boys go full Grammar Nazi, drop some mumblebars, and fall into global capitalism’s thirst trap. Just like every week, you get some Patreon Perks: you get to hear the boys get called out for a showdown at high noon and witness the evolution of shitpost music. One note: about twelve hours after this episode was recorded, Edgar was rushed to the hospital for a stupid and embarrassing medical emergency, and he’s still on the...

The Hard Times w/ Ian Macfarland

Here's your ad free episode of The Hard Times Podcast. Ian McFarland of Blood for Blood joins Matt and Bill to talk about his movie “The Godfathers Of Hardcore” and the struggles of making art for commerce. Support Ian’s movie here: www.godfathersofhardcore.com

The Pitch Group Episode 28: Mark Bouchard

Mark Bouchard joins the show this week to talk about folk punk orchestras and mental health.  Give Mark a follow @BarkMouchard and Please subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, Spotify, etc. 

The Trojan Koopa

This episode has it all! And by "it all" we of course mean "very little." Mario and Luigi head to some island because King Koopa (no alter ego) has kidnapped Princess Toadstool and put her on the other side of a big wall. How will Mario and the gang get inside to save the Princess?! Well have you noticed this one's called The Trojan Koopa? In the live action, Mario veteran Norman Fell, famous for his 1-second cameo in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood returns when the brothers strike oil in their...

The Hard Times Podcast w/ Zac Carper

Here's your ad free episode of The Hard Times Podcast! With a new special patreon only outro segment!  FIDLAR’s Zac Carper joins Matt and Bill to talk about the Hawaiian Scene, Jonah Ray, older punks and Matt breaks down why Zac is hot. 

The Pitch Group Episode 27: Kaitlyn Jeffers

The very funny Kaitlyn Jeffers joins the Pitch Group this week to talk a bit about comedy music and some of her most interesting jobs! Make sure to check her out on the Hard Times Anniversary Show and give her a follow @_KaitlynJeffers. Please subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, Spotify, etc. 

Fanboys: Skarcasm

On this week’s nonsensical and eclectic episode of Fanboys, the boys pressure a bluesman to do drugs, foolishly allow a ska band into the hall of fame, and debate the merits of screamy shouty boys. And since you’re a Patron, you get to hear the boys rock out in Kazakhstan and chill with some real jazz cats. Anway, if you want to guarantee a spot on the show, send some music to edgartowner@gmail.com. And while you’re at it, BUY THE HARD TIMES BOOK ( 2019-12-03 09:00:01 +0000 UTC View Post

The Koopas Are Coming! The Koopas Are Coming! w/ Jon Gabrus

The hilarious Jon Gabrus (High and Mighty, Raised by TV, a buncha other stuff) joins the boys to discuss this truly batshit tale of George Washingtoad and his battle against the Koopish Army. Luckily Mario and Luigi show up and are able to help GW and his crew cross the Delawide River. That’s right, if you like living in America, you can thank Mario and Luigi (and to a lesser extent Toad). In the live action segment, Obi Wan Cannoli (character unrelated to Star Wars in any way) shows up jus...

The Hard Times Podcast w/ Brian Fallon Part 2

Here's your ad free episode of the Hard Times Podcast. Brian Fallon returns to cohost the podcast with Bill! Their first guest is OutVoice founder and ex Hard Times member Matt Saincome. They chats about instagram followers roasting Matt and Bill, check in with each other’s nipples, the fitness of Hardcore, discuss some city little secrets about Gilman and Brian confronts the hosts on why is article is not in the book. 

The Pitch Group Episode 26: Dan Luberto

The legendary Dan Luberto joins the show today talk about his time in and out of stand up and how he was one of the early contributors in the Pitch Group! Follow Dan @TheDanLuberto and Please subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, Spotify, etc. 

Fanboys: Folk Punk Labor Disputes

On this week’s shockingly counter-revolutionary episode of Fanboys, the boys chill with Eddie Vedder’s less-popular cousin, get radicalized by folk punk, and have a cyberpunk fever dream. Also, before any of you get the wrong idea, let’s state for the record that The Hard Times is a firmly pro-labor organization that only employs Edgar, that insufferable corporate hack, to give him a platform upon which to make an ass of himself every week. Regardless, since you’re a Patron, you get t...

The Mark of Zero

In one of their laziest naming conventions yet, Mario and the gang head to El Desert Land to seek out the legendary masked hero known as Zero. What's he gonna do to help? I dunno, I guess get immediately captured by El Koopitan and his crew of ne'er-do-wells. Meanwhile, in the longest live action segment to date, Inspector Clean shows up and he's pissed off because he hasn't evicted any old ladies in a while. His words, not ours.

The Hard Times Podcast w/ Nobody

Here's your ad free episode of The Hard Times Podcast! No guest this week so Matt and Bill shoot the shit about the tour, how Celina accidentally doxxed Matt and they swap stories about everything from cars to ketchup.

The Pitch Group Episode 25: Tom Peters

Description-You learn a lot about Tom Peters in this weeks episode of the Pitch Group Podcast. You learn about his experiences as a stand up comic, his time spent in bands and how his friends feel about his contributions to the Hard Times. Most of all we find out just how patient of a person Tom is. Thanks,as always, for listening! Don’t forget to preorder your copy of the first ever Hard Times book! 

Headlines for You to Pose and Make All Your Friends Jealous

Hello everyone, sorry for the delay in headlines. We just got off of our book tour and everything was thrown out of whack. Speaking of the book, have you picked up your copy? Go check it out at your local bookstore, we know you will love it.

Anyway, here are the headlines available for posing. The Hard Times headlines are at the top. If you see something you like email Bill to claim the headline bill@thehardtimes.net. Scroll down and you will find Hard Drive and if you see something th...

Fanboys: The Curse of Noise Rock

This week’s episode of Fanboys is actually legitimately cursed. The boys repent for past sins, listen to a reject from the Scott Pilgrim soundtrack, and star in this season’s hottest anime. Not gonna lie: this is a weird one. They recorded two whole songs and do a whole extended bit about anime, which, again, we at The Hard Times do not and will not endorse. In any case, you know the drill: since you’re a Patron, you get to hear the boys get sucked into a 30-track conceptual electronic ...

The Ten Koopmandments w/ Matthew Mercer

Matthew Mercer (Critical Role, every video game) joins Mark and Jeremy to discuss this preposterous episode that was originally conceived as a King Tut thing and then evolved into a Ten Commandments thing somewhere along the way. That means for every Koop Tut you also get a Red Sauce Sea being parted. It’s completely ridiculous and it’s also somehow less bizarre than this week’s live action segment, wherein Vincent Van Gogh shows up at Mario and Luigi’s apartment to try to hustle them...

The Pitch Group Episode 24: Finn Mckenty

Finn Mckenty joins the Pitch Group podcast this week to discuss his work in Marketing, music and even a little bit of about Jiu Jitsu! Make sure to check out The Punk Rock MBA, the URM Academy and RecordingMetalGuide.Com! Thanks,as always, for listening! Don’t forget to preorder your copy of the first ever Hard Times book! Please subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, Spotify, etc. 

Fanboys: We Fix Bands

This week’s episode of Fanboys is downright inspiring, you guys. The boys welcome back a hometown noiseboy, teach some bright young kids how to rock, and follow their creepy uncle into a basement. Also, drum roll please: since you’re a Patron, you get to hear the boys play D&D with some grindcore hooligans and host a Disney punk show. If you want to guarantee a spot on the show, send some music to edgartowner@gmail.com. And while you’re at it, BUY THE HARD TIMES BOOK (2019-11-12 08:14:24 +0000 UTC View Post

Legend of Zelda: Underworld Connections

Some very vile vires vie for the triforce in this vexatious episode of the Legend of Zelda cartoon! Also they dang broked it up into three pieces with a hammer or some shit. Mark and Jeremy experiment with waiting a few days after watching the ep to record the pod and end up going on long tangents about the 1960s Batman show. Meanwhile, INSPECTOR FRIGGIN GADGET shows up, played by Maurice LaMarche himself! This episode is actually pretty cool, you should listen to it.

The Hard Times Podcast w/ Matt Pryor

Here's your add free episode of The Hard Times Podcast! Matt Pryor of the Get Up Kids is on the podcast today! They discuss Hard Time articles making fun of his band, building thieves tools to shoplifting CDs, making punk music for kids, and the politeness of Japanese audiences.

The Pitch Group Episode 23: Jesse Cannon

Producer of over 1500 albums and author of two books (Processing Creativity: The Tools, Pactices And Habits Used To Make Music You’re Happy With & Get More Fans: The DIY Guide to the New Music Business) Jesse Cannon joins the Pitch Group Podcast today to talk about music, comedy, satire and so much more! Don’t forget to preorder your copy of the first ever Hard Times book! Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, Spotify, etc. 

Fanboys: Fuck It: Christmas Episode

This week’s episode of Fanboys is needlessly, obnoxiously festive. The guys dunk on a bassy highschooler, embrace the dark void of Youtube grunge, and dive into the Springfield Krusty-punk scene. I’m not gonna lie to you - the boys are really on some shit this week. There’s a whole bit about Metal Gear Solid, and Edgar drops a Wham! reference out of nowhere. We here at The Hard Times cannot sign off on either of those things. Anyway, we have a gift for you: since you’re a Patron you g...

Bad Rap w/ Andy Holt

Hey homeboys and homegirls, it’s a hip hop themed episode of The Super Mario Bros. Super Show! They uh, they rap. The whole thing. Everyone raps it. It’s uh ... well, they rap. Mark and Jeremy enlist the help of fellow Hard Drive editor and hip hop superfan Andy Holt to make heads or tails out of this trip to Rap Land. Is it hot fire? Is it that wack shit? Sergeant Slaughter makes his long awaited return to the basement in the live action segment if THAT tells you anything!

The Hard Times Podcast w/ Chris Conley

Here's your ad free episode of the Hard Times Podcast! Chris Conley of Saves The Day joins Matt and Bill to talk about being labeled the “bad influence friend” and how Chris is the most well adjusted guest on the podcast yet. And after the interview, an on the road update from Bill and Matt including a new segment where Matt's girlfriend Celine completely destroys him. Make sure to check out The Hard Times: The First 40 years available now! 

Pitch Group Episode 22: Nick Ortolani

The Pitch Group is joined by hard times contributor and stand up comic Nick Ortolani! Nick shares about how he got started working with the Hard Times as well as his pop punk roots. Make sure to follow him @NickOrtolani and check out NickOrtolani.com for any upcoming shows! Thanks,as always, for listening! Don’t forget to preorder your copy of the first ever Hard Times book!

Fanboys: A Very Hip-Hop Halloween

This week’s episode of Fanboys is deliberately and desperately spooky. The guys dig on some rap, rock out to some Spanish-language Rage Against the Machine, and take a drive through a pop-rock cartoon. They really overcommit to the Halloween theme. It’s kind of sad. Anyway, since you’re a Patron, you get to hear the boys embrace the funk and shit on your friend’s rap project, and that’s a happy Halloween if we’ve ever heard of one. If you want to guarantee a spot on the show, send...

The Unzappables w/ Vinny Vinesauce

The prophecy is complete: Vinesauce's Vinny joins the podcast to discuss Mario and the gang's descent into Crime Land (in the midst of the city's worst crime wave ever, thanks to Al Koopone!!). In the live action segment, Mario is turning the basement into a bed and breakfast and he's convincing people to sleep over by saying that George Washington did so himself, once. Too bad Washington's ghost shows up and immediately enlists Mario and Luigi into the army during a dream sequence (??) expla...

The Hard Times Podcast w/ Aaron Gillespie

Here's your ad free episode of the Hard Times Podcast! This week, Aaron Gillespie of Underoath and the Almost joins Matt and Bill live from via an airport! They talk about , how Elon Musk might be from outer space, the Mormon DNA test conspiracy, doing anal for god, and if there’s straightedge NASCAR drivers.

Quick note: Aaron kindly did our podcast from an airport so you may here some airport sounds. That’s just how real and hardcore we are.

Pitch Group Episode 21: Edgar Towner

Edgar Towner joins the Pitch Group this week to talk about his time playing in bands, how he found the Hard Times and HIS podcast on the Hard Times podcast network! Make sure to check out The Fan Boys podcast, out every Tuesday and follow him @EdgarTowner! As always, for listening! Don’t forget to preorder your copy of the first ever Hard Times book! Please subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, Spotify, etc.