rudetalesofmagic

Brooklyn Podcast Festival Now 10000% Ruder. Rioting kills 20.

Hey look! another live show coming up, this time at Union Hall as part of the Brooklyn Podcast Festival. What fun!! Union Hall is a fair sized venue, but still, it might sell out, so we're sending you, our dearest, most precious patrons, this event link before we blast it out on sosh (social media) Monday. Hope you can make it!

Elf Lords, your instructions for your free ticket are on the Discord in the *wink* you know where channel  *winks*.

I love you. 

Rude Gifts of the Magi

Hello, magical beings! Ali Fisher here. I play Cordelia Sasquatch on the show and I’m here to talk to you about online shopping.

That’s right! It’s officially the holiday season and capitalism has us in its filthy clutches. And look, most of us will feel some sense of obligation to buy things for our loved ones, so Carly and I are here to help. 

We’ve pulled together a gift guide to ease you into the holiday shopping mood: 2019-11-29 19:13:49 +0000 UTC View Post

Rude Talks of Chatting e005 "Fools Crush In"

The gang discusses episode 5, the live show, crushes, other ttrpgs, and so so much more INCLUDING a fantastic closing number from POWER FAN @alopaden

ELF LORD CHARACTER ROLL

Hail, Lords!

One of the perks of your noble title is the privilege of having a Cordelian 5E character rolled and created for you by the Rude Tales crew. Amazing news- we're ready to launch that today!

Fill out the attached form (where you can give us as much or little info about this hot new character as you want) and we'll send you a character sheet with all the crazy details on your brand new, all-original character. Frame it your wall, give it to your Mom, introduce it into y...

Rude Tales Discord Party TONIGHT

Greetings weary traveler, and welcome to this message in your electronic mail bin... or perhaps you have stumbled on it whilst browsing the Patreon string woven by the cyber spider of the World Wide Web (WWW)? Listen I don't know where I'm going with this, so the introduction is over.

The cast and crew of Rude Tales of Magic will be hanging out on the Patron Only Discord chat tonight to take questions and gab and generally have a lovely time staring at our computer screens. If you haven...

Sloane Langley Thatcher's dream journal

Hiya, folks!

Branson here. Remember eight days ago when the now legendary fourth episode of Rude Tales dropped? Remember how Albee read from Sloane Langley Thatcher's dream journal? Well guess what, the original dream journal was WAY longer. I got carried away writing it! Most of it was cut out of the final edit, but now that dream journal is available to you, our beloved patrons. Enjoy!

Rude Talks of Chatting e004 "Dial E for Elf"

Producer Taylor joins the cast to crack the case of episode 4! 

Discover! Uncover! List former Improv Teams!

They came out ice cold

If Branson's lavish descriptions of the Lindsinghams and their opulent manor weren't enough for you: 

1. how dare you

2. here are some concept drawings from Branson and Carly!

What do YOU think this wretched family looks like? 👀 Show us on Twitter and/or the Discord!

Maybe you come to a little live show thing we doing?

Hello sweet Spirits! If you're interested in coming to a very small, very intimate, very experimental live taping of Rude Tales of Magic on November 14th, in Brooklyn, New York, then you're gonna love the form linked here. Since this is our first one, and it might suck, it's free. 

Please do not share this with anyone. Right now, it's patrons only.

"What's he saying?"

Carly here! If you're like me, then pencil tests and rough animation have always been more exciting to watch than the finished product. I've been dying to animate some lip sync for Flipcup ever since we first heard his voice in Episode 3, so I spent my Saturday doing just that. This is a pencil test from the scene where Cordelia uses her new ability to talk to Flipcup. I had a lot of fun working with the casts' VO here! 

I'll probably be talking about my process in greater depth so...

SECRET SHOW: Elf Lords Only

Psssst, hey. This is a secret show with Branson and Taylor, for Elf Lords only. No joke, the cast doesn't even know about it.  We wanted to talk about stuff with you, as producers of the show, that we can't really talk about in public or with bigger groups of backers.

This is for your ears only, for real. If we ever find an Elf Lord leaking the audio of the secret show or even just relaying what's said on the secret show, we'll remove that Elf Lord from the Patreon.

This show...

Experimental Live Show! Get your tix now, m'LORDS.

We're gonna try a fun little live show! Nov 14th, at 7:30 in Greenpoint, Brooklyn, NY. 

Right now, we're only telling you, the ELF LORDS. On Monday we'll open it up to your lessers, so if you can make it, get in there, rsvp, and secure a seat, asap. Space is VERY limited, so move fast if you can. We're gonna try and figure out a live streaming option for you LORDS that for some reason do not live in The Big Apple of Them All, New York city baby.

Oh and hey, Happy Halloween! 2019-10-31 21:05:01 +0000 UTC View Post

Rude Talks of Chatting e003 "Mother Knows Best"

The gang gathers to discuss Episode 3 "Mother Knows Best", answer questions from the ELF LORDS, and decide the fate of StirFry once and for all.

If there's something you'd like to hear on Rude Talks of Chatting, let us know in the Discord, which is fun and you should join it.

Rude Tales of Carving

Do you have PUMPKINS? Do you have KNIVES?

Learn how to put both to good use with our first ever instructional video: "How to Carve Some Pumpkins"! If you feel inspired to carve your own pump after watching this video, please share on Twitter (be sure to tag @of_rude)!

Happy RUDE-O'-WEEN, from all of us to all of you! 🧡🖤

Frederick de Bonesby

Hello! Voice of de Bonesby, Christopher Hastings here! I have been dying to share my sketches of my favorite failed lich dandy, and the police that run our Patreon have finally allowed it. I don't know why I decided the "good one" should have bobble head proportions, but it's fun, so I went with it.

Mind you, this is by no means Frederick's final form. He's always experimenting with new wigs, stick-on facial hair, exotic makeups, and child sacrifice to achieve the human...

ORIGINAL CAST DRAWING

Here it is, patrons! The first drawing of the cast from a few days before we recorded our first episode. Look a little strange to you? Subscribe at the $10 level and up for access to Rude Talks of Chatting where we reveal the behind-the-scenes scoop on this preliminary artwork. Bear the Black Grail if you dare to drink of the forbidden knowledge which animates this odd, semi-canon drawing. 

The Black Grail Runneth Over

Namaste, GrailGulpers®! Check your email for the new Black Grail RSS feed. The podcatching app of your choice is the ideal way to collect and absorb the contents of the Black Grail. Drink it up! Let it become you!

“Nothing is sacred, all is permitted.”

Rude Talks of Chatting ep002 "Down for the Count"

This is the show where we talk about the show! AND THIS IS THE EPISODE where the gang hears Tim's new theme song for the first time. It's a really nice moment. It involves piss and bottoms (rear ends).

Rude Talks of Chatting ep001 "Class Dismissed"

What's the only thing better than experiencing a work of art first hand and making up your own mind about its merits and meanings while leaving the immaterial details of production where they belong, behind the figurative fourth wall? Why, the opposite of all that of course! Here on rude Talks of Chatting we'll be sliming you with HOT TAKES, PROBING QUESTIONS, and BEHIND THE SCENES TRIVIA (Chris Hastings is a real prankster on set!) about the most recent episode of Rude Tales of Magic.

...

Pure, Untreated Poopus

"Dibs!"

Our delicious supplicating Bearers, Hail and well met. Here is the unedited introduction of Poopus, rich with lore and mystery, from Episode#2 Down for the Count.

We try to keep our hot, hot eps around an hour and a half, but sometimes there's jewels and gems that fall out of our mouths and onto the floor while we're chewing on all that beautiful show. Listener, here is some of that trash. 

Soon we'll start publishing stuff like this (and waaay more thi...

No Bones About It: Episode 2 is Nearly Here

Taylor here. Episode 2 is now crowning and will soon he plopped from our podhole like so much placental sack. Does it have spooky themes in accordance with the season? Listener, it does. Did we plan it like that? Listener, nuh uh. We are God’s own fools, prancing about blindly, oblivious to the nature and source of our own good fortune, a tribe of audio Magoos, and somehow, more loveable for it? If you say so!

One detail that is very much intentional is the spooky decoration in my apa...

Episode 1 Sketches*!

Some assorted drawings of characters we met in episode one! Reena/Cheddar and Cordelia by Branson, Straid Plancis by Carly. New episode drops Tuesday!

*Sketches, not skits. 

Episode 007

License to THRILL! [james bond reference]

Taylor here. 10 minutes into episode 7 and I’m laughing so hard I’ve exacerbated my abdominal hernia.

I simply cannot wait for you to meet the Pepsi Brothers.

Also check out my cord management. You like it? You getting hot about it?

Animatic Timelapse

A little behind-the-scenes time-lapse from the creation of our animatic video, to celebrate 69 patrons (delicioso)

Meet Albee!

Carly here! I play Albeara "Albee" Dawn and I'm also...a draw-er? I drew this design for Albee before we even started recording! We had rolled our characters at that point and I was getting pretty excited, so I wanted to get into the character and figure her out a little bit; designing her was a fun way to do that! 

We don't really believe in "official" designs for our PCs — except for Albee. This is literally what she physically looks like IRL. 

Way Down in the Hole: Digging Deep With the Davo Dude

SPLASH! Thats the sound of the "splash" made this week when netizens the world over met Davo, the breakout star of the fresh-faced, blockbuster new podcast Rude Tales of Magic this week. But Davo, isn't really...Davo. He's made up, a character, fictional, wholly invented and portrayed by actor/writer Tim Platt. I caught up with Tim, appropriately enough,...

WELCOME TRAVELER!

If you're reading this, our inaugural patreon post, it means you're one of a select few who thought to get in on the ground floor of the world's first dungeons and dragons actual play podcast. Sit back, relax, kick off your shoes, and get comfortable as we lavish you with opulent exclusive content.