LaChenille

The Grand Azathoth Hotel - Chapter 41

Chapter 41 Magnus had crossed countless thresholds before. Portals torn from the fabric of realspace, daemonic rifts leading to cyclopean di

Chapter 41

Magnus had crossed countless thresholds before. Portals torn from the fabric of realspace, daemonic rifts leading to cyclopean dimensions, the yawning maws of gods whose very being defied structure. He had stepped into hellscapes and nightmares, walked the halls of the impossible, and bent reality to his will.

Curse These Old Bones - Chapter 47

Chapter 47

Somewhere in the Southern Land of Fire 

The forest canopy stretched endlessly around Shikamaru, each leap through the trees a calculated effort that pushed his body just enough to be effective, but no more than necessary. It was exhausting but he couldn’t deny there was a certain thrill to it. If it weren’t so troublesome, this kind of movement might have actually been fun. The wind in his face, the rhythm of his steps, the sub...

The Grand Azathoth Hotel - Chapter 40

Chapter 40 Robin had spent months in the Hotel, long enough to recognize its moods. It was not a place in the way normal buildings were. It

Chapter 40

Robin had spent months in the Hotel, long enough to recognize its moods. It was not a place in the way normal buildings were. It did not simply exist. It felt. It observed. It chose. And right now, it was changing in ways it was not supposed to.

She sat at the reception desk, her fingers pressed against the pa...

Curse These Old Bones - Chapter 46

Chapter 46

Konoha

Asuma’s boots made a quiet thud as he hopped lightly across the rooftops of Konoha, the wind ruffling his messy hair as he made his way toward Gate 221. A few seconds of leaping between buildings, and there it was, the caravan awaiting him. He landed effortlessly in front of the gate, his feet barely disturbing the dust as he took in the sight before him.

Twenty-two enormous cartwheels were lined up, each one packed to th...

The Grand Azathoth Hotel - Chapter 39

Chapter 39

“Arty?” James called out, frowning when there was no answer.

That wasn’t normal.

Arty was the type of kid who always heard first. She was an outdoorsy kid. Sharp, quiet, always listening—she could pick up on a snapped twig, a distant footstep, or someone trying to sneak up on her. It was just the way she was. That kind of awareness didn’t just disappear. Which meant something was wrong. James sighed and picked up his pace, hands slipping...

Curse These Old Bones - Chapter 45

Chapter 45

Konoha, Land of Fire 

Two months after the Academy Graduation 

"Cat", Hiruzen called. 

The door creaked open, and Cat. Dressed in tight black armor that hugged her lean, muscular frame, she moved with effortless power. Her mask obscured her face as her dark eyes assessed the room. 

Hiruzen leaned back in his chair, stretching his arms over his head with a soft groan. A year...

The Grand Azathoth Hotel - Chapter 38

Chapter 38

Agony.

Not just pain—something far beyond it. Something that tore through muscle, bone, and divine essence alike, grinding her down with every passing second, unrelenting, inescapable, endless.

Artemis gritted her teeth, her arms trembling, her legs burning as she fought to keep standing beneath the unbearable weight of the sky. It was more than a mere physical burden—it was existence itself, pressing down on her shoulders with the force of ev...

Curse These Old Bones - Chapter 44

Chapter 44

Konoha

Two months after the Academy Graduation 

The Hokage’s office had shed its ceremonial weight. The clutter of scrolls, trinkets, and relics was gone, replaced by clean surfaces and walls adorned with a whiteboard scribbled with equations, half-erased diagrams, and ideas that felt alive even in their incompleteness. Hiruzen’s blood clone, a mirror to the original body that now roamed Konoha a...

The Grand Azathoth Hotel - Chapter 37

Chapter 37

Ah, fresh air.

James stepped out of the Hotel, stretching with a satisfied sigh. It had been way too long since he last got out. The air was crisp, carrying a faint citrusy scent, mixed with the usual earthy aroma of a well-kept park. He rolled his shoulders, cracking his neck as he took in his surroundings.

And paused.

Huh.

A garden.

That was new.

He didn’t remember the Hotel being in a garden. Had someone done renovatio...

Curse These Old Bones - Chapter 43

Chapter 43

Konoha

"Fuck you, Hound!" Tiger bellowed, his voice rough as he twisted mid-step to avoid the chakra-coated kunai hurtling toward him. His hands were tied behind his back, his sweat-soaked uniform clinging uncomfortably, and his thigh muscles burned from the constant dodging.

Hound—their commander, now, thanks to some cruel cosmic joke—barely tilted his head at the insult. His lone visible eye sparkled with that infuriating bl...

The Grand Azathoth Hotel - Chapter 36

Chapter 36

Thalia swallowed hard as she stepped into the Hotel once more, every muscle in her body tense.

The last time she had been here, she had been a child, running for her life. But now, even standing still, she felt like she was back in that night. Every shadow seemed too deep, every corridor stretched too far, and the furniture—gods, the furniture. She couldn’t even look at the couches without feeling a phantom shiver crawl down her spine.

She sta...

Curse These Old Bones - Chapter 42

Chapter 42

Kiri. Hidden base of the rebellion. 

“Chōjūrō,” Mei’s voice cut through the oppressive stillness of the stronghold like the hiss of a blade leaving its sheath. Low, sharp, and cold, it commanded obedience. “Stop fidgeting before I nail your feet to the floor.”

The words struck him as intended. His hand froze mid-air, hovering over the hilt of Hiramekarei like a guilty child caught stealing. He straightened, his p...

The Grand Azathoth Hotel - Chapter 35

Chapter 35

“…Almost finished with the fourth part.”

Sophia stiffened, a cold spike of unease running down her spine. She had to leave. Now. The woman hadn’t seen her yet—if she just broke a window, trashed the place fast, and ran, she could still make it work. No one would know it was her. But something wasn’t right. The way the woman spoke, the way she sat there so calmly, like she already knew she wasn’t alone.

The book snapped shut.

Th...

Curse These Old Bones - Chapter 41

Chapter 41

Kiri 

“Your people couldn’t even manage to finish the job properly,” Baki muttered, his voice as dry and cutting as the desert winds of his homeland. His sandal landed with a crunch on scorched, brittle ground, the air thick with the coppery stench of burnt flesh and blood. “Now we have to waste our time cleaning up your mess.”

The Kirigakure hunter at his side, a wiry man with a shark-toothed mask, snorted, his con...

The Grand Azathoth Hotel - Chapter 34

Chapter 34

Shal’Zir, Keeper of Temptation, Daemon Lord of the Twelfth Circle, basked in the symphony of suffering.

The Palace of Slaanesh shimmered in its endless decadence, a living citadel sculpted from the bodies of those who had lost themselves in desire. The walls pulsed with sensation, exhaling a perfume that intoxicated the soul. The air was thick with music and moans, a chorus of agony and bliss that no mortal could endure without surrendering to madness...

Next Kage Chapter ?

Which chapter do you want first ? You'll get both stories with exclusive chapters, so it's just a question of order !

Curse These Old Bones - Chapter 40

Chapter 40

Pakura’s body twitched before her consciousness fully returned, the sensation of a warm fire pricking at her exposed skin. Her eyelids fluttered open slowly, and for a moment, the world around her felt foreign, almost surreal. She blinked, her golden eyes narrowing against the flickering light as her vision sharpened. The last thing she remembered was blood—so much blood—and the suffocating mist of the Kirigakure assassins. Her fingers curled instinctiv...

The Grand Azathoth Hotel - Chapter 33

Chapter 33

Percy sat in the backseat of the car, which was technically the Sun, and tried not to think too hard about it.

Apollo had the wheel—or whatever passed for a wheel in a flaming chariot that somehow functioned as a convertible—and for once, he wasn’t talking. No off-key haikus, no dramatic soliloquies about his own greatness, no attempts at flirting with anyone in the vehicle. Just silence.

Which was really weird.

Annabeth hadn’t asked...

I'm Albus Fucking Dumbledore - Chapter 59

Chapter 59

14th of September 1991

SPIRE Tower, England

Andromeda Black sat with her legs crossed, her midnight-blue robes cascading elegantly to one side. Her stiletto heel tapped faintly against the polished floor, a barely perceptible rhythm that betrayed her restlessness. Her sharp, stormy eyes flicked to the delicate watch encircling her wrist, a gift from her late husband, its face inscribed with runic symbols that glowed faintly. What was he doing? she wondered, her l...

Curse These Old Bones - Chapter 39

Chapter 39

Shikamaru sat on the grass, back against a tree, his legs stretched out lazily in front of him. His whole body ached, not the sharp pain of fresh wounds but the dull throb of overused muscles. He winced as he shifted his weight, the effort just enough to remind him how much yesterday’s “bell test” had taken out of him. Asuma-sensei hadn’t been gentle, that was for sure. His idea of an introduction involved them eating dirt more times than Shikamaru ca...

The Grand Azathoth Hotel - Chapter 32

Chapter 32

The bar was empty.

James liked it that way sometimes. No guests, no noise, just the rich, low notes of jazz humming through the room, filling the space like something tangible. The soft glow of the bar lamps reflected off polished wood, catching on rows of neatly arranged bottles, casting long, lazy shadows across the floor. It was peaceful. The kind of peace that only came with solitude, when the world outside didn’t exist for a while.

He poure...

I'm Albus Fucking Dumbledore - Chapter 58

Chapter 58

14th of September 1991

SPIRE Tower, England

Cornelius Fudge gripped the portkey—a battered brass key ring etched with the Ministry seal—and felt the nauseating lurch behind his navel as he was yanked through space. When his polished shoes slammed onto solid ground, he stumbled slightly, righting himself with a sharp tug at his lime-green bowler hat.

And then he looked up.

“Merlin above…” The words escaped his lips before he could stop them. ...

Patreon - Non-canon SFW Extra 1 - Grand Azathoth Hotel

Ddraig the Red, former Death-Wyrm of Cymru, once chewed a demigod in half mid-sentence because he didn’t like the man’s accent. He had bathed in the blood of paladins, played strip poker with an archdevil (and won), and once broke up a holy war because both sides ran out of adjectives. He'd devoured saints. Out-drunk dwarves. He once headbutted a Philosopher King so hard the man reinvented himself as a Poet Queen, and honestly? Much improved.

That sort of résumé usually earned a l...

Curse These Old Bones - Chapter 38

Chapter 38

The forest was silent except for the faint rustle of leaves, the sound of fleeting lives too small to matter. Sasori walked through it without a sound, his steps unnaturally precise, every movement devoid of waste. The trees were tall, their rough bark etched by the passing years, but Sasori barely glanced at them. It wasn’t beauty—it was decay. A process of rot pretending to be majestic. He hated it.

“True beauty doesn’t rot,” he muttered, hi...

The Grand Azathoth Hotel - Chapter 31

Chapter 31

James sighed, leaning against the counter with his chin propped on one hand. The café was empty. Not just slow, not just quiet—completely, utterly empty. No customers, no conversation, just the faint hum of the fridge and the rhythmic ticking of the clock. Even the regulars hadn’t shown up today. No monk woman with her endless patience, no bald guy with his anxious robot companion, no group of strange Japanese kids dropping by at ungodly hours.

He ...

I'm Albus Fucking Dumbledore - Chapter 57

Chapter 57

9th of September 1991

Dumbledore Manor, England

The intruder’s cloak rippled like water, dissolving into casual attire as though the air itself willed the transformation: a plain, no-brand t-shirt and jeans that somehow managed to seem more audacious than any formal robe. The figure was startlingly young, their blonde hair catching faint light like a halo. His face was open and boyish, but his expression carried the easy arrogance of someone who knew they’d a...

Curse These Old Bones - Chapter 37

Chapter 37

Iruka Umino stood at attention by the double doors of the largest meeting room in the Academy, the rigid set of his shoulders doing little to hide his nerves. The weight of the moment pressed against his chest, and he gulped quietly, his gaze darting over the room. Nearly a hundred people were assembled, filling the rows of seats arranged in perfect symmetry. Every teacher from all six Academy sites was present, along with their respective headmasters. The Gr...

The Grand Azathoth Hotel - Chapter 30

Chapter 30

Percy hadn’t realized he was kneeling. The explosion of light had been so blinding, so scorching, that it had driven him to the ground before he could even process what was happening. His head pounded, and the residual heat of Apollo’s arrival still prickled against his skin, like the aftermath of staring too long at the sun. Slowly, he blinked, trying to force his vision to adjust. When he did, he noticed he wasn’t the only one—Thalia, Annabeth, Grov...

I'm Albus Fucking Dumbledore - Chapter 56

Chapter 56

9th of September 1991

Dumbledore Manor, England

Andromeda took another sip of her whisky, savoring the burn as Celia began the debrief. “Well,” Celia said, breaking the comfortable silence, “I’d say that went as well as we could have hoped. Albus managed to deliver his announcements with the usual panache: the Hogwarts reform, the SOCKS initiative—”

The party had ended at 2 a.m., the grand halls of Dumbledore's mansion finally cleared of guests....

Curse These Old Bones - Chapter 36

Chapter 36

Naruto looked at his teammates—Sakura and Haku.

Sakura… well, she wasn’t strong. Not yet, anyway. But she was smart, really smart. And she never gave up, even when it looked like she should. That had to count for something. As for Haku... Naruto didn’t know what to make of them. Polite and quiet, yeah, but there was something about Haku that felt different. Something sharper, deeper, like an edge that hadn’t been unsheathed yet. And strong. He...