Funatic

The Gamer Chapter 1482 – The Great Harem Palace

“Ya done?” Rave asked, jumping from one leg to the other.

“No,” John told her, his finger outlining the bird’s eye view of his Palace, including the base. “Of all the things that aren’t automated… you would think that I could just do these selections with my mind. I can press yes or no with brainpower if I concentrate enough. I can even close Achievements by just thinking about it. But this? No, I just have to do this by hand.”

Finally, the last line...

The Gamer Chapter 1481 – Stretch and Difficulties

The harem went through phases.

This was unsurprising. Most people and even most collectives went through phases. A person may fancy a particular brand of cereal as their breakfast for several weeks, only to give it up in an instant and replace it with a new or old staple. A society may develop a sudden veneration for a fruit in particular, sending demand for it sky high in a display of mass craving, only for the entire market to crash when the peer pressure vanishes like th...

The Gamer Chapter 1480 – 27 Days of Preparation Finale – Perks, Piles and Preparations finished


‘Pretty good final results,’ John thought, as he tapped through the windows to get another level in the Negotiator Class.

Over the past 7 days, he had got...

The Gamer Chapter 1479 – 27 Days of Preparation 32 – Stuck Between a Cuddle Rock and a Soft Place

John was experiencing a lot of interesting mix-ups these days. Three different locations constantly drew the harem apart. One was the workshop, where the crafting crew, a term that Gnome had started to use and that was slowly sticking, worked and often required the aid of various haremettes to test their products. The second was the dungeon, where John, even on the 20th day, continued to grind through Instant Dungeons to stockpile more interesting items. The third was the house, ...

The Gamer Chapter 1478 – 27 Days of Preparation 31 – Harem and Haremettes

John looked at a photo on his smartphone. He tried to look at it, anyway, but the claws that kept swiping at his hands made that difficult. Barely, he kept his phone out of the reach of the talons, occasionally sneaking peeks at brown hair, brown feathers and high cheekbones.

Ultimately, he skipped back a few cushions on the large couch. The leather squeaked, as did the lady of the night, her usual dignity entirely subsumed by the need to set after him. Before she could cra...

27 Days of Preparation 30 – Unlikely Cuddle-fellows [Gnome POV]

“Fuck!” Scarlett cursed.

The single word encapsulated the feelings that were on the faces of all the girls around Gnome. Scarlett, Delicia and Lee wore it openly, Hailey chewed the inside of her cheek, and Lorelei expressed it only through a short-lived scowl. All of their attention was directed towards the spear that had just ricocheted off the stone wall it had been launched at.

Lying in the grass, the brass weapon invoked the image of a snapped toothpick. “S-...

The Gamer Chapter 1476 – 27 Days of Preparation 29 – And more banter still

“I can’t believe I agreed to this,” Scarlett complained.

The technomancer was flanked by Nia and the Creator Puppet. The former was truly next to her, the latter hung about two steps behind. Five paces ahead, Aclysia was the vanguard of their little formation, her dagger in hand.

They were advancing through a jungle. Left and right, the foliage was so dense that even Aclysia’s many swords could not hack through. Sometimes there had been a hidden path, leaves c...

The Gamer Chapter 1475 – 27 Days of Preparation 28 – Just more Banter

John found himself, as he so often did, balls-deep inside Nathalia.

The dragoness had barged into the gaming room and demanded that he stretch out her insides. Lee was right that his concentration of highscores was all too easily broken by attractive women. The sanctity of the gaming room had long since been compromised by a great variety of additions. One of them was a bed, another one was the kind of massive steel frame that looked like modern art until one roped up a cum...

Richard doing a menace

Big skeleton-headed puppetmaster creature

The Gamer Chapter 1474 – 27 Days of Preparation 27 – The Mellowing

“Ya takin’ it very serious, ain’t ya?” Hailey asked, following the dragon maid walking up and down.

“I am recovering something I have neglected,” Aclysia responded and furrowed her eyebrows. Stopping, taking a step backwards, she repeated the stride with a little less swing and a little more grace. Hands folded in front of her crotch, she allowed herself a small pleased hum. “I did not even realize I’ve been stomping around so much recently.”

“The ...

Drip-Fed – Season 4 Author’s Note

“Huh, wait a second, Season 4 Author’s Note?”

Yeah, this is going to take a moment.

Hello, Funatic here.

As you may or may not be accustomed to by now, I typically split my Seasons up into Arcs, my Arcs into Chapters, all of that. Having a Season that consists of only 1 Arc is a first, but let’s go through what happened here.

Putting it simply: I wrote myself into an interesting spot. Not a corner, I would say, for the reasons that there were no pl...

The Gamer Chapter 1473 – 27 Days of Preparation 26 – Going Along and Adjusting Backwards

Day 16 of the grinding.


Five levels acquired over the course of five days. Pretty terrible performance, especially since he had no interesting Loot to show fo...

Drip-Fed – All but Forsaken Finale – A decision made

A creature like a worm, shaped entire from tailbone. It slithered around the party at constant speed, burrowing into and blending with the white, jagged walls. Fused ligaments and skeletal segments formed a coral-esque formation. Even the ground was riddled with holes.

The worm creature surfaced between Reysha’s legs. Swift as she was, she only managed to dodge through the use of Shadowstep. The redheaded Rogue was breathing heavily. This had only been the latest in a cha...

The Gamer Chapter 1472 – 27 Days of Preparation 25 – What were the odds? [Salamander POV]

‘Fuck, why are girls so sexy?’ Salamander thought, hovering right behind Rave’s delicious ass. That it was delicious, the apocalypse elemental had verified many times in the past and was likely to verify the moment they got out of there.

“Ya can fantasize about what we do after we get outta here after we clear this room.” Rave ran a finger up the curvaceous side of the taller, hovering woman.

Salamander felt the goosebumps spread all over her red skin. “Yo...

The Gamer Chapter 1471 – 27 Days of Preparation 24 – Long Unused Mechanics


“Man, I haven’t used this in forever,” John, in the form of the Creator Puppet, said out loud. Typically he only touched this window when he disabled the Loot...

The Gamer Chapter 1470 – 27 Days of Preparation 23 – Downtime

John did not know how his life had come to include preening two different sets of wings, but he did not mind at all. Granted, he was enjoying one set of wings much more than the other, but both had their perks.

The first set belonged to Nightingale. A purple so deep it came across as black, unless inspected more closely, her wings were worthy of the night goddess. Goddess or not, a harpy was a harpy, and as one of the civilized kinds of birdwomen, she had evolved with the p...

The Gamer Chapter 1469 – 27 Days of Preparation 22 – What to do from there?

“Look who remembers her place.”

Scarlett shot him a glance equally displeased and turned on, as she dropped every last article of clothing at the entrance of their temporary home. The condition presented at the start of this grinding session was still fully in place and so Scarlett was not allowed to wear anything within these four walls. Beside the collar that she so properly had put around her own neck days before – and continued to put back on each time she went ho...

The Gamer Chapter 1468 – 27 Days of Preparation 21 – Butts are more Fun

The posterior of his favourite fairy was placed in front of him. A gorgeous convex below a gentle concave, painted into reality in a white so pure it glowed softly in the artificial light of the room. From the back of her hips, the deposit of juicy meat rose in a manner both sharp and gradual. The sheer size of Momo’s bubble butt created creases that underlined her cheeks in perfect symmetry.

There was no blemish to anything about it, not even the slightest flaw. Standing...

Drip-Fed – All but Forsaken 24 – The Ones too Useless

Aclysia’s glowing hand glided through the air shortly above the unconscious man. Her brows quivered; the eyes closed. The healing magic was directed ever so carefully, trickling through clogged circuits, atrophied and malnourished tissues, and attempting to revitalize a heartbeat that had long since lost its lustre.

Apexus kept his thumbs on two pressure points, preventing the man from awakening. “What is his state?” the humanoid chimera asked.

“Dire,” Aclys...

The Gamer Chapter 1467 – 27 Days of Preparation 20 – Fighting is Fun

‘I get an almost criminal level of enjoyment out of that sound,’ John thought, Inkaryl’s blades spreading and then slotting back into place. It was a perfect little bit of sound design. Each elemental switch sent pure joy down his proverbial ear canals. It was almost as rewarding as caving in the skull of another elf with the force of burning starlight.

John was feeling like a mini-Arkeidos, advancing with confident steps. An unflattering self-description in many ways...

The Gamer Chapter 1466 – 27 Days of Preparation 19 – The Simple Joy of Advanced Violence


‘That’s a window I haven’t looked at in a while,’ John thought. The last two grinding sessions had been predominantly filled with Raiding. In the olden days...

The Gamer Chapter 1465 – 27 Days of Preparation 18 – A Weapon fit for a King

Inkaryl and Rex Magnar were sitting at either side of the table. Rave hadn’t even put Illuminare back down and Metra hadn’t asked her to either. The choice was down to a binary.

The First of Wrath sat in the armchair typically reserved for Momo or Siena, when they were reading, or John, when he was making an announcement. Her eyes drifted back and forth between her halberd and his mace. One trembled constantly with anticipation for greater violence, the other emitted a ...

The Gamer Chapter 1464 – 27 Days of Preparation 17 – Divine Manifestation and Gaming Life

It was the morning of the 11th day of the grinding session. In proper time, they were about 2 hours into the second day. Since they had entered about midnight, this put the current environment of the grassy plain into a deep darkness. It was early June and the nights were short, but not short enough to end at 2 AM.

The obsidian tower loomed. Its silhouette created a black rift in the stars. The pulsing of the magma and the presence of the night found an equilibrium in an en...

The Gamer Chapter 1463 – 27 Days of Preparation 16 – Craftswomanship

Lorelei was treating his cock like it was her god.

“Sweet Master, praise be… upon thee for this magnificent offering. May your manhood… mhhhmmm… find the depths of my throat… satisfying and… know the love of my every caress in its… total depth… for I care about naught but the pleasure… brought to you by my actions…” The sermon was interrupted constantly by the hungry licking of a haremette that knew her time was limited.

Wrapping her lips around ...

Drip-Fed – All but Forsaken 23 – Further

“Are you sure you want to leave?” Laima asked.

“No,” Apexus responded sincerely. “I am only certain that stagnancy is worse than a half-shaped decision.”

“We say half-baked,” Reysha chimed in.

“We could ship you to the Dreadnoughts,” the pirate captain suggested. Her motives were obvious, even to Apexus. The four of them were more powerful protection than anything money could buy on this Leaf. It would take the deliberate effort of an army ex...

The Gamer Chapter 1462 – 27 Days of Preparation Interlewd – Victory Orgy

John awoke the next morning from the sensation of someone dropping on top of him. Opening his eyes to the darkness of missing contact lenses, he spent all of three seconds confused. His cock was guided into wet folds. As the woman impaled herself down to the base of his manhood, a deep, throaty moan escaped her. The voice was recognizable instantly.

“Look who has recovered,” the Gamer said, while putting his sight in place.

Smirking back at him, tail wagging, Metr...

The Gamer Chapter 1461 – 27 Days of Preparation 15 – A Mythical…

…Mace? Halberd? Bodysuit? Rapier?

Inkaryl, Rex Magnar, Illuminare, and Strimata were sprawled out on the ground. The villainous-looking mace stood, its six points buried in the grass. The halberd lay there, sometimes quivering impatiently. The bodysuit had been reduced to the glove it had originally been, lying on the table at the centre of the arrangement. The rapier was leaning against that same pedestal, happily singing. In the middle of the table, in the middle of the...

Momo Butt

For financial reasons, I decided to start a series of commissions by Somiko that put the backside of the various haremettes into focus. I still fully intent to finish the set of full body lewds eventually, but I'll require additional funds for that.

Until then, have some lovely backside.

I elected Momo personally, as a pilot for this project series, and am really pleased with the result. You'll get to vote for the next one, as per usual.

The Gamer Chapter 1460 – 27 Days of Preparation 14 – Legendary Loot and Mythic Ichor

“You didn’t do the nerd scream?!” Lee practically screeched. “That’s a thousand years of bad luck!”

“I am unaware of that particular facet of nerddom,” John confessed.

“Yeah, but you’re also a casual. I mean, really, cuddling a woman? Cringe,” Lee declared, then physically cringed herself at her own humour. The judgemental stares of everyone else around, particularly Scarlett, made her blush.

John just chuckled at the scene. Still seated fi...

The Gamer Chapter 1459 – 27 Days of Preparation 13 – The Unbroken King of Knights

The giant of a humanoid towered over all of them, his size only increased by the power of the four knights now swirling inside his radiant chassis. Flaming eyes beheld all of them for a single second, before he swung his rapier at Metra, leaving an incandescent trail of light.

The First of Wrath blocked the attack with the shaft of her halberd. Astrotium screeched over the marble floor, the force pushing her back several metres. The attack rippled up her arm, decreasing her...