ALLCAPS COOKBOOK PRESENTS: Pumpkin Pie Cream Puffs

They might look messy, but they're fabulous.

Awhile ago Bastian asked if I knew how to make cream puffs, and I said sure do, super easy, though it looks gross almost the whole time you're making it.

Obviously, being 7, they wanted to get in on that.

But I can't just make a plain thing, can I? You know me. It's fall, I HAVEN'T MADE ANY PUMPKIN SHIT YET, and it seemed like I could probably figure out a way to smash these two things together.

I started with this recipe, but again, you know me. The thing is, I felt like...couldn't it be more pumpkiny? But you can't really mess with the pastry too much, we're gonna get into it in a second but this is choux pastry, and dumping pumpkin into a pastry with no rising agent is gonna upset the science and you don't want to see, or eat, baking science upset.

So I thoughts to myself, how can I make the pastry pumpkin-related also? And I ended up using the things I would use to make the crust of a pumpkin pie to make the pastry. They came out just right, and have the light flavor of a buttery graham-cracker crust.

There's nothing hard about this at all and it can all be made easily in well under an hour. If you're quick and stick the puffs in the fridge to cool faster, possibly a hair under half an hour.

But there is something intimidating, and that's the choux pastry we said we'd get back to. She's a weird girl. If you like The Great British Bake-Off, you've heard that word before.

Everything about this is going to look disgusting the whole time. There's something about boiling butter and water together that just conceptually turns my stomach, maybe you don't feel the same, but blech.

Honestly, though, just follow the instructions and you'll be fine; it's not hard, it's just WEIRD.

HIGHLY recommend serving these with coffee, it's just about the most perfect thing.

***

Ingredients

1 cup water

½ cup butter

1 generous pinch salt

1 tablespoon sugar

1 cup minus two tablespoons all-purpose flour

1/4 cup very fine graham cracker crumbs

4 eggs

1 1/2 cups heavy cream

1/3 cup powdered sugar, plus extra for dusting

2 teaspoons pumpkin pie spice

1/3 (15 ounce) can pumpkin purée

JUST FOLD IT IN, DAVID

Ok, Choux-less Joe, let's do this.

Pre-heat oven to 425 and put the bowl you intend to mix the cream in into the freezer.

Combine the water, butter (cut into pats) and salt in a saucepan and bring to a full boil, stirring to loosen the butter. When it's boiling, turn the heat OFF so you don't just cook the flour instantly, and add the flour in, stirring quickly to keep it from sticking. The mixture will form a disgusting ball.

Put the disgusting ball into a mixing bowl. I didn't bother with my stand mixer for this, but if you use it, use the paddle attachment. Add the sugar, graham cracker crumbs, 1/2 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice, and one egg. Gently mix with a silicone spatula. Add in the rest of the eggs one at a time, fully incorporating each one before you crack the next.

Drop heaping spoofuls onto an ungreased baking pan. These won't spread much, so make them just a little smaller in diameter than you'd want your final puffs to be.

Bake at 425 for 20-25 minutes, mine came out absolutely perfect at 22.

You want the puffs to be a bit warm, but cool enough not to melt the cream filling when you stuff them, so don't start the cream until they're out of the oven and cooling. Add cream to the freezer-frosted bowl (use a pinch of cream of tartar if you want) and mix on medium high until slightly thickened. Then add the rest of the pumpkin pie spice and the powdered sugar and continue to whip until stiff, thick peaks form.

In the same bowl, DAVID, gently fold in the pumpkin puree. This is a VERY heavy substance being added to a light and airy one, so take your time and be careful not to break the structure.

When you have a pale orange gooslop, take a bread knife and cut the "hat" almost but not quite all the way off the top of each puff. Spoon as much cream as you want in, then let the hat close over the top.

Dust with powdered sugar and a bit of pumpkin pie spice and marvel at how little time that actually took.

Then feel ill when you look at that saucepan you now have to clean.