The Second Archon War: Comedia Glacialis 18

Comedia Glacialis 18: The Princess sleeps while the Cast Scheme

Despite being a temporary military camp, the main Fatui pavilion looked more like a luxury vacation spot than it did the front lines of a brutal war. There were thick carpets, overstuffed armchairs, and real silverware for the delicate porcelain dishes that their caviar was served on. 

Kollei hated it. Her soldiers weren’t indulging in such luxury. Only Nastya and herself were afforded this, and Kollei didn’t want it. She’d grown up with nothing but raggedy blankets and sleeping on packed earth, eating out of tin cans with a cheap knife. How could she feel comfortable with this opulence when she knew the Fatui grunts were sleeping in thin tents with simple military rations, or whatever they’d pillaged from the local populace? Something Kollei wanted to curb, but knew was pointless to attempt to do so. At least she’d stopped the rapes. 

“Ah, there you are, Kollei! Come in, have some hot chocolate and medovik,” Nastya said, waving from where she was reclining at table and sipping from a steaming cup of her own. She was still wearing her uniform, and Thoma was standing behind her, silent as always these days. 

“I-I’m fine. The battle, did we…?” Kollei asked, swallowing and trailing off. She hated actually fighting, instead working as a roving medic to treat their wounded. Which also provided her with opportunities 

“A smashing success. Dearest Thoma drove off that pest Legend. Didn’t you, my Servant?” Nastya asked, reaching up to caress Thoma. He bent down so she could do so, more like a dog than a man. 

“Good. I, um, I healed all the wounded, but…casualties?” Kollei pressed. 

“Acceptable. We inflicted far more than we took, and of course, thanks to the Tsaritsa’s benevolence, we have far more capes to spare. And besides, I captured several of theirs. They’ll be on the front lines soon,” Nastya said with a throaty chuckle. “I’ll tend to them later.”

Kollei’s heart sank, but she nodded. The sooner the war came to an end, the better. And if they could turn the enemy’s forces against them… “See that you do. We need to make another push soon. Anatoly isseems to be succeeding in Latvia, and we can’t allow him to gain all the glory.”

That made Nastya’s eyes narrow. “Yes. My beloved brother cannot be allowed to be the one to claim the prize. Do not worry. We’ll be in Warsaw soon enough. Even with the Yankees, these fools cannot hope to stand against us.”

Nodding, Kollei turned away. “I’ll be in my quarters.”

There was a sudden creak of leather, and Kollei felt the heat of Pyro bathe her back. “Intruder,” Thoma’s voice growled. 

“Kollei! Where did that Knight come from?!” Nastya demanded, her voice suddenly tense. 

Kollei looked to Amber, whose eyes had gone wide, and face pale. But she had her back straight, her posture defiant. “I don’t know what you’re saying, but I’m Sir Amber Kohlhaas. Uh, we don’t have a service number or anything, but that’s all you’re getting out of me!” 

“She’s mine,” Kollei said, not turning back around. “I captured her.”

“Did you, now? That’s not like you, Kollei, Nastya said, her slippers silent on the floorboards. Kollei still sensed her, and stepped to the side to block her, half turning to glare at Nastya.

“Yes, I did! And I will handle the interrogation. Not you. Keep your strings off of her,” Kollei growled. 

“Why? She’ll tell us everything, once she’s mine,” the Dancer said, a wicked smile on her lips. “They always do.”

“Not for what I have planned. Now Obey! Or do you question my authority, Harbinger?” Kollei snarled. She hated this. Hated it so much. That she had to get her claws out, even to talk with someone who had once been her beloved elder sister, if only for the briefest of times. 

And if she was truly honest with herself, she hated her mother  for forcing this upon her. Forcing Anastasia to become this monster. Helping turn Thoma into a mannequin. And turning Kollei into a ruthless, cold-hearted warmonger. 

Anastasia’s expression went blank, as she and everyone else in the room bowed deeply to Kollei, save for Amber, who gritted her teeth and clearly had to resist the impulse. “As you command, Princess. So it shall be. Let me know if you seek any guidance on…techniques.”

“Do not presume too much, Harbinger. Or I will be forced to put you in your place,” Kollei said, putting ice in her voice. This time, Anastasia simply bowed her head as Kollei swept from the room, Amber hurrying along behind her. 

“Uh, so, thanks, I think? From saving me from her? Cause, uh, you’re not gonna do the whole fate worse than death thing with me, right?” Amber hissed, leaning close to walk beside Kollei.

“Do not speak, prisoner,” Kollei snapped, forced to play the role she was put in. “You have escaped the Dancer’s attentions, yes. But you are at my tender mercies now.”

Seeing Amber’s expression of horror and betrayal hurt Kollei to her very core. What sort of monster had she become?

Mirror on the wall, I am my Mother after all. 

Shivering despite her immunity to the cold, Kollei led Amber into her own chambers, which had been constructed just for her, a complete manor house with servants, luxurious furnishings, and decadent decorations of priceless paintings, statues, and enough clothes fit for a ball as well as the battlefield. 

“Leave me,” she told the servants. “I wish to be alone with the prisoner.”

They at least knew better than to gainsay the Imperial Princess, and soon Kollei was alone with Amber in her rooms, setting wards to ensure they were not spied upon. She wouldn’t put it past Nastya to do so these days. Or several other capes with ambitions. 

With a wave of her hand, Kollei dismissed the thorny vines that had bound Amber, causing the other woman to groan in relief and reflexively rub her wrists. “Oh thank Barbados, that’s better. But, uh, didn’t you say…?”

“It’s fine when we’re alone. And no. I’m not going to interrogate you. At least, not like Nastya would,” Kollei said, slumping into a chair. “Please, have a seat. There’s cookies and tea if you want some.”

“Uh, sure! It’s not laced with anything, is it?” Amber asked, but grabbed a cookie and bit into it anyway before passing the tin to Kollei. 

“Mostly a lot of sugar. I didn’t have a lot of sweets growing up, so I’m making up for lost time,” Kollei admitted, taking a bit of the cookie and savoring the buttery goodness. For a moment, she could just pretend that she was enjoying a nice snack with a new friend, that everything was right with the world. 

“Not to um, lead to my own demise or anything, but…what exactly are you planning to do with me?” Amber asked nervously, breaking the all too brief spell. 

Sighing, Kollei opened her eyes to the grim reality about her. “I need information, and not the kind you get by mind-controlling people.”

“I’m not telling you anything,” Amber said, a sudden stubbornness in her tone. “I’ve heard of good-cop-bad-cop.”

“Not strategic or tactical information. If I wanted that, I’d just invade people’s dreams,” Kollei sighed and earned herself a look of horror from Amber. “No, I mean…how do we come back to the table? How do I find a way to exchange prisoners, have a dialogue with your side? We can’t just keep killing one another! That’s how Scion wins, how the world is destroyed. There has to be a path to peace, right?” 

They munched on cookies in silence for a few long minutes, until they were all gone. Kollei could get more, of course, but she really didn’t need them, and more sweets would never fix this problem. 

“I don’t know,” Amber said quietly, looking at the empty tin of crumbs. “Why did you have to start this war in the first place? I really don’t think you understand how much the Poles hate Russia and Russian rule. That guy who stood up to you at the Sejm? That was Deputy Janusz Solecki. Formerly Captain Solecki. He served with the Free Polish Forces in World War II, then emigrated to America after the Soviet Union conquered Poland. He returned after Poland was freed only a decade ago. He spent his whole life working to free his nation from Russian rule, more than sixty years! There’s no way he’d ever submit. And frankly, he’s not unique.” 

“But I thought…I thought people…that they didn’t hate us, so much,” Kollei said, shrinking in on herself as tears filled her eyes. “I remember hearing…we were brother nations. We were all Slavs. That we united to fight the evil Germans- Ah! Sorry!” 

“Don’t be. Germany doesn’t exactly have a clean history either. Especially not with Poland and Russia,” Amber said, weariness in her voice. “But it doesn’t go back to World War II, Kollei. It goes back to 1431 when the German Teutonic Knights invaded Poland. It goes back to the partitioning of Poland in the 18th century between Germany, Austria-Hungary, and Russia, or the wars with Russia in the 17th Century. There is so, so much hatred and animosity between our peoples that stretches back to times we can barely even remember.” 

Biting at her lip, Kollei stood, going over to her nightstand and pulling out a book. She flipped through it, checking the dates that Amber had mentioned while the knight sat silently, watching her. By the end of it, her fingernails were chewed off stumps and she was a nervous wreck. In frustration, she threw her book against the wall. 

“It’s all true! Why!? Why doesn’t my mother KNOW this!? Why didn’t she THINK about this!? Of course, Poland is going to hate us! The only surprising thing is that they accepted German help at ALL because they hate you just as much if not more!” 

“I mean, did anybody tell her? I hate to suggest that maybe the Tsaritsa isn’t the bad guy here, but…she’s not exactly familiar with Earth’s history, right? She’s from Teyvat too, or heaven, or whatever. Maybe she just didn’t know?” Amber offered lamely. 

“She should know. That’s her job,” Kollei said, slumping down next to her bed in despair and hugging herself tightly. 

There was a rustling, and to Kollei’s shock, Amber came over to sit beside her and hug her tightly. How? How was this woman who Kollei had taken as a prisoner of war, who had more reason to hate Kollei than anyone in her mother’s court, the one who was showing her real love? How was Sir Amber Kohlhaas the first real friend that Kollei had met in…how long, now? She couldn’t remember. 

“It’s alright. You’re still a kid. I wouldn’t expect you to know all this. Heck, I wouldn’t know all this if Lauren wasn’t a huge nerd and made me go to all her SCA and HEMA stuff. Uh, that’s the Society for Creative Anachronisms and Historic European Martial Arts.”

“Is…is she your girlfriend?” Kollei hiccuped. She’d started crying, and was trying to dry off her tears as she wept. 

Amber laughed at that. “That’s what everyone thinks! But, no, we’re both straight. Much to Capri and Naomi’s deep disappointment. Lauren has a boyfriend, actually, she’s dating Hospitalier. I’m, uh, single. I’m not so good at er…romantic relationships. More with tinkering with…stuff.” 

“I’ve never had a boyfriend or a girlfriend, but I’ve wondered,” Kollei admitted. “I’d ask my Mother, but…uh…well I don’t know that she’s the right source for that sort of thing.”

“Well, I would say you’ve come to the right person, but all my information comes from bad web novels,” Amber said with a giggle. “Have you ever read Train to the Stars? I’ve had a huge crush on Dan Heng for years!”

Kollei went bright red, but her eyes lit up like fireworks, forgetting about her tears. “Yes! Oh my gosh, when I read about the Mara-Struck wedding for the first time I was in tears!” 

“Yeah, and we all know whose fault that was,” Amber said darkly. 

“‘Fuck Luocha!’” 

Both girls feel over one another, giggling hysterically. They ended up laying on the plush carpet, staring up at the ceiling. 

“I think we could have been friends, if we’d met another way,” Amber said quietly, her fingers laced behind her head, hair in a halo about her. 

A lump formed in Kollei’s throat, and it took a few moments for her to be able to swallow it. “Yeah.”

There wasn’t much to say after that, and despite herself, Kollei drifted off to sleep, exhausted after the day's events. She dreamed an impossible dream of peace, one where she and Kollei had met not on the battlefield, but in a laboratory. It was a strange dream: Kollei felt like she had radiation poisoning again, but Amber appeared, dressed much as she had before as a Knight of Favonius, only…different. It felt as though their story was playing out in a very different way as Amber rescued her from sickness and death, and the clutches of an evil Doctor. 

Sometimes, a dream was just a dream. 

But for Kollei, her Dreams were never so simple. 

Once she was certain that Kollei was asleep, her breathing regular and steady, Amber slowly sat up. She looked down at her captor, feeling a strange swell of emotions. This was not what she’d thought the Imperial Princess would be like. At all. She’d assumed Kollei would be a monster like her mother or the Harbingers. Instead, she’d found a sweet, innocent girl, who longed for peace more than anything.

And yet there was a darkness in Kollei. A willingness to do whatever it took to achieve her ends, just like the Tsaritsa. Amber shivered, then stood on silent feet, tiptoeing over to the bathroom. She locked herself inside, then sat on the toilet. Feeling her teeth with her tongue, she activated her built-in radio, keeping her voice as low as she could.

“Outrider to Avenger. Come in, Avenger…”

For a few seconds, the only thing Amber heard was the pounding of her own heart. Then, she heard a faint crackle in her ears. Barbados bless her sub-dermal implants that only a Tinkertech scan could possibly reveal. 

“Amber?! Amber, is that you?! Thank Barbados, please, tell me you’re alive!” Lauren’s panicked voice yelled in Amber’s ear. 

She winced, whispering, “Keep it down! Yes, I’m alive. But…well, I’ve been captured…”

“Oh God. Oh God! Amber, no! Please, tell me, not by the Dancer!” Lauren gasped, and Amber could hear the tears in her voice.

“No! Well, um, I did meet her. But it’s not the Dancer. It was like I said in my last communication. The Princess found me. And…she’s not what I expected.”

“The Princess!? Amber, that’s almost worse! Ok, don’t panic, we’ll mount a rescue mission to get you out of there!” 

“No! Please, don’t! I…I think I can do some good here, crazy as it sounds…” Amber said, wincing.

“Absolutely not! Amber, the Fatui are MONSTERS! You know what they do to people!” Lauren snapped.

“I do! It’s just…Kollei’s different. I…I have a message for Lord Barbados, actually. I have to keep it short, but…can you pass it on to him? Please?” Amber asked.

“Of course. I’ve already sent him word of your…disappearance. Tell me everything.”

Hastily, Amber outlined her plan. “That’s…that’s all. You got it?”

“I do. You’ll keep us updated, right? Someone will be manning this receiver, 24 hours a day,” Lauren promised. 

“Thanks. And...stay safe out there, OK?” Amber whispered. 

“You too, Amber. You’re my best friend. Don’t make me avenge you,” Lauren whispered, and the pain in her voice made Amber start to cry. 

“Vengeance is the Lord’s. So leave it to Barbados,” Amber chuckled, then, with a click of her tongue, she switched off her radio. 

Then she hugged her knees to her chest, and wept, rocking back and forth on a golden toilet seat. This was her duty as a knight. But it didn’t make it any less painful. 

Exhausted, Keith slumped in his seat, looking up at the table, but unable to see the map or the numbers. It was all too much at the moment. “How bad is it?”

“Well, Eidolon and Miss Militia have stabilized the front in Latvia, beating back the Thief’s assault just short of Riga,” Armsmaster said, looking through some papers. “But the Tsaritsa’s forces have made it to the Baltic. It’s bad.”

“Southern front is even worse. The Prince is active again. Cookie and President Alexandria have pulled out of Lechówka. They’ve fallen all the way back to Piaski. Nothing we’ve tried has been able to stop him this time, and we lost twenty capes on the last attempt,” Chevalier added. He looked up, his face drawn. “Not to mention the dozen we lost in that skirmish today. And that’s just the Protectorate. If you include the Polish forces and the Knights…it’s even more dire.”

“How long until the Protectorate fully mobilizes?” Keith asked, clutching at his head. 

“We’re getting there. More capes are arriving by the day. They cut a deal with the Teeth, believe it or not. They’ll be arriving soon,” Armsmasters said, sounding disgusted. “With any luck, the Butcher and his ilk will end up dead.”

“That just means that Russia gets the Butcher, which is frankly even worse,” Keith said, looking up in irritation. 

“Or the Archon cleanses the Butcher like the plague it is and it’s no one’s problem,” Armsmaster said, apparently unconcerned. “Either way. Even the villains are joining the cause for the Amnesty President Alexandria is offering.”

“She’s not the president yet. Her formal inauguration isn’t supposed to take place for another two weeks,” Chevalier pointed out. 

“Cut the bullshit, we don’t have time for it,” Armsmaster snapped. “She’s President, and you know it. Bradley declared war because she told him to do it. Which is a damn good fucking thing if you ask me. Or do I need to remind you that my grandmother was Polish?”

“We’re all Polish today, Collin,” Keith sighed, sitting up straight. “We all volunteered to be here.”

“For a given value of ‘volunteered,’” Chevalier muttered, earning himself a glare from Armsmaster. He raised his hand. “Relax, relax. It’s the right thing to do. But Jesus Christ, Collin. You have to see what a fucking disaster this had been so far.”

Collin’s lips pressed together, but he jerked a nod. “Reminds me of an Endbringer battle, honestly. Nothing but death and devastation. And for what? Fuck. I thought the world was actually turning around.”

That caused Keith’s eyebrow to raise. “You? An optimist, Collin?”

Collin shifted slightly, looking uncomfortable. “You know I was a part of the exchange program with Kusinali. Took some classes. She…helped me. Shit, I wasn’t a fan of the Raiden Shogun, or Lord Barbados for that matter, but that little girl? Christ, Keith. I was fucking at Madison. Anyone that can spare a city, any city, from the Simurgh? Twice? Makes a man consider getting religion.”

“And how do you feel about Lord Barbados now?” a new voice asked, as Captain Lauren Eula strode into the room, dressed in her armor as usual. 

“Sent by the Son of God himself to save Poland, Amen,” Collin growled. 

Keith’s expression softened, and he stood up as the Knight Captain crossed to the table. “Captain Eula. I’m sorry to hear about your friend, Sir Amber. We’ve all suffered tragic losses, but her cheer and skill will be missed.”

“Then you will be gladened to know that Amber is alive. Captured, but alive,” Lauren said, forcing a strained smile on her lips. 

At that, even Armsmaster had the good graces to look horror-struck. What the Fatui did to captured capes…it didn’t bear thinking of. The Tsaritsa and the Dancer were both easily the two strongest and most terrible Masters in existence. Worse than even the Faery Queen or the Slug, on the level of the Simurgh. If she weren’t busy fixing her past deeds, that was. 

“Oh God, Lauren. I…I’m so sorry,” Keith said, fighting back tears. To think of that bright young woman in the hands of the Harbingers…

“Do not be. She is of sound mind. It was the Princess that captured her. Not the Dancer, thank Lord Barbados,” Captain Eula said, making the sign of Anemo over her heart by hooking her thumbs together and forming a pair of wings with her fingers. 

“She escaped?” Collin asked, standing with a look of shock. “Are you an imbecil!? She’s a plant! She has to be secured before she-”

“No, Armsmaster. She is still in enemy hands,” Lauren said, glaring at the man for his usual lack of tact. “But the Princess seems to wish to open channels of negotiation and diplomacy. She seeks to find an end to the war that doesn’t involve every last Pole or Russian dead. It doesn’t seem the Tsaritsa is aware of this, however. But it is a chance. For Amber, and for us all.”

“I can tell you right now Ajaks won’t go for it,” Keith said, folding his arms over his chest. “Or the President. Elect. Alexandria isn’t interested in peace. Just pieces.”

Captain Eula nodded, her hand going to the hilt of her sword. “I am of a similar mind. But…there is potential. Amber gave me a message to pass on to Lord Barbados, which I have taken steps to accomplish. However…if we can lure out Kollei Moskaylova…”

“Then we can capture her,” Chevalier said, a look of interest in his eyes. “And if we have our hands on a high value target like that…”

“Then the Tsaritsa goes ballistic and takes to the front lines herself,” Keith said grimly. “Look, we’re only in this war because the Tsarista hasn’t taken the field.”

“We can take her,” Collin growned, and Eula of all people nodded her agreement. 

“Are you insane!? We can’t even handle the Harbingers!” Keith said, feeling ice run down his spine. He took a deep breath and leaned on the table. “Look. You three haven’t seen an Archon fight. I have. Both Venti and the Tsaritsa. And I can safely tell you that nothing, not even an Endbringer, is on that level. For Christ’s sake, the Tsaritsa fought TWO Endbringers on the level of the Alpha Behemoth, and she nearly won! Venti shredded Khonsu like he was a toy! If the Tsarista takes the field herself, we’re finished.”

“What is this about the Ice Bitch herself taking the field? I have waited for this day!” 

Keith closed his eyes as Ajaks bounded into the room. Despite the fact that he hadn’t slept in days, the man was bright-eyed and bushy-tailed as ever, grinning broadly. He was a bit scruffier and less well-groomed than normal, but, well, Keith hadn’t had a shave in days and smelled awful. He tried to act like he didn’t care, but if Arthur saw him now…

“We have a plan to capture the Princess and lure out the Tsaritsa. If we can take her down, this war is over. And I will have my Vengeance,” Captain Eula said grimly. 

“We will all die if you do that!” Keith cried, opening his eyes and looking around the room in desperation. 

Collin snorted. “I didn’t come here for the health benefits. Do it.”

“It’s a shot to end this thing, Keith. We have to take it,” Chevalier said, his tone gentle, but his words pure madness. 

“I am for this thing as well. I will contact my brother Itul. He would not miss such a fight!” Ajaks crowed. 

Keith moaned, covering his eyes. “We can’t. This is pure lunacy.”

“In war, risks have to be taken, Sir Legend,” Eula said grimly. “If we fall, others will avenge us.”

“Ha! A glorious death! What else could a man ask for!” Ajaks said with a broad grin. “Come, you are the one with the name of Legend! Do you not wish to become one?”

What he wanted was to go home to Junior and Arthur and read a good book while Arthur cooked him supper in the kitchen. What he wanted was to watch the kids kendo match and talk with Annette and Kazoo about the Longshoreman game. What he wanted was to be anywhere but here.

“...I’ll ask the President,” Keith sighed. 

But he already knew what her answer would be.