Alex in Haremland 2 Chapter 4

The air was thick with dust, and I coughed with aching lungs. My ribs were bruised beneath my exploring fingers, but they weren’t broken, and the rest of my body seemed to be in decent shape. Light streamed down from the hole above us, but even from the top of the pile of rubble, the distance to the surface was still daunting. Erosion continued to eat away at the edge of the crater, and large stones were tumbling free from the dirt.

I took a deep breath, and I turned to my companions. Some were still stumbling to their feet and brushing the dirt and crumbs of the ceiling from their clothes.

“Is everyone okay?” I asked.

A nicker from one of the friesians caused my gaze to slide over to the clump of horse-like creatures. Several of them were favoring one leg, and their terror filled multiple eyes flicked around in every direction.

I crossed the distance to the small herd of young friesians, and I cast my eyes over the worst of the injuries. Nothing looked broken, but I wasn’t an expert on weird-horse-like creature anatomy. I wished more than ever that I’d brought Ziti with me to translate to the friesians, but there was no point wasting thoughts over things I could not change, so I pushed the thought from my mind.

The friesians were in no condition to climb back up the pile of rubble that was once the roof of the tunnel we now stood in, but there had to be another way back to the surface.

“Mae,” I called over my shoulder without pausing my inspection of the young horse-like beings. “Come see what you think.”

The Dodo-woman limped over, and she cradled her arm against her bosom, so my brow furrowed with worry.

“You’re injured,” I said.

“Mere scratches, Dreamer.” Mae waved her good hand in a dismissive gesture. “How are our friesian friends?”

“Look to be in a similar state as you are,” I said, and I turned my concerned look back to the horse-like creatures. “It doesn’t seem like we’ll be in any shape to climb back up through the hole in the roof.”

“We all took quite a tumble,” Mae agreed with a nod. “But never fear, Dreamer, I am confident you shall lead us to daylight once more.”

“How are the others?” I asked.

“In good spirits,” Mae reported before she pulled out her pipe with her good hand.

“Alex!” Una cried out as she hurried over to my side. “What just happened to us?”

“The ground collapsed beneath our feet,” Mae stated the obvious.

“We’re in a tunnel of some kind,” I explained as my eyes lifted to the corridor leading into darkness. The opposite direction was blocked by the pile of rubble, so the only way we could go was forward. “We should try to find a way back up.”

“Who made this tunnel?” Una tilted her head to the side as her violet orbs followed my gaze down the corridor.

My eyes returned to the hole in the ceiling, but even from the top of the rubble pile, the surface was still further than I could jump. I glanced around at my companions as my thoughts raced, but I was torn between staying where we were or risk getting lost in the tunnels.

“I’m not sure,” I finally replied to Una with a shake of my head. “But they don’t look man made. There aren’t any support beams or anything else keeping the tunnels from collapsing…”

“Then what kind of creature could make something so large beneath our very noses?” Mae questioned.

“I kind of hope we get back above ground before we find out,” I said as my frown deepened.

“You don’t expect them to be friendly?” Mae narrowed her eyes and took a long pull from her pipe.

“Things are not always as they seem in All-the-land,” I reminded the Dodo-woman with a tight lipped smile. “I made the mistake of lacking a healthy dose of suspicion once, and the smiling trees sent the Clover Cards to Havenwood. I’m not going to make the same mistake twice, so until they are proven innocent, I will assume whatever things made this tunnel are minions of darkness.”

“We can’t just stay here,” Mae pointed out. “And we have no rope to climb out with.”

“We should have grabbed the rope that bound the friesians in the clearing,” Una said, and she planted her hands on her hips. “I can go back for it!”

“We should stay together,” I argued.

“Yes, Dreamer,” Una sighed, but her eyes were still full of love and adoration.

“We should look down the tunnels,” I suggested as I gestured toward the closest torch in the wall. “At least there’s light.”

“Let the warriors rest and recuperate some of their strength first, please,” Mae requested, and I gave her a curt nod in response.

“I’ll stand watch,” I said.

A short while later, we’d all eaten some of our travel rations and drank heavily from our water skins, and I decided there was no time like the present to get out of our predicament. With any luck, we’d find a tunnel that brought us even closer to the Sunrise Mountains so we wouldn’t have to back track, but I knew there was just as much a chance we were going in the opposite direction.

It was slow going, and the injured parties in my group did their best to keep up, but I made sure to match their pace. It was important we all stay together, since there was no way of knowing what dangers lurked in the shadows of the tunnels ahead.

We came to a junction, but the tunnel branched downward into the darkness, and there were no more torches casting shadows to disperse the blackness that lay down the new corridor. A cool breeze wafted up from the hole, but the crumbling dirt falling from the ceiling gave me pause.

I didn’t want to go deeper, I wanted to go up, so I bypassed the downward angled tunnel and continued onward.

“These are expertly crafted corridors,” Mae observed as she peered around at the dirt walls. “It would have taken an army… Or a lifetime to complete.”

“Do you think some kind of people live down here?” Una asked. “Wouldn’t they miss the sun? And the kiss of the breeze upon a cheek? Oh, and bacon! Do you think there are bacon trees down here?”

“I don’t have any of the answers yet.” I gave my two female companions a wry smirk. “Not so sure I want to find out, either. Let’s just stay focused on getting our heads above ground first. We’ll worry about who created this maze later.”

“You’re the Dreamer,” Mae replied with a tilt of her three-pointed hat. “We are all inclined to follow your instructions.”

“I’m not perfect,” I reminded the Dodo-woman. “I’m glad we are all together. I couldn’t do this without the two of you by my side.”

“Nonsense,” Una argued, and the cat-girl flapped a dismissive hand in my direction. “You can do anything!”

“Thanks.” I gave her a sideways smile, and she winked back at me.

Our companions followed along behind us, and no one complained when I decided we should increase our pace slightly. Doctor Kria would be overwhelmed by healing all their injuries when we returned to New Haven, but maybe if I gave her more of the “samples” she’d requested, we could broaden our base of volunteers to experiment on. If what Una believed about my sperm was true, then my warriors and the friesians could be healed by the concoction the doctor mixed, but I wasn’t going to force anyone to do it.

I glanced at the curious cat-girl as she peered around the circular tunnel, but she showed no indication of knowing my thoughts. Her violet orbs absorbed every detail of our surroundings with a rapt fascination, but then her fingers curled around mine and squeezed. I returned the pressure, and I took a deep, calming breath.

There was no point worrying about things I couldn’t deal with yet. For the moment, I needed to focus on finding a way out of the maze-like tunnels and back to the surface. The people of New Haven would think the worst if we were gone for much longer, and they’d only just begun to have hope again.

“What’s going on inside your head, Dreamer?” Mae questioned with a pull on her pipe, and her smoke trail seemed to coalesce into the shape of a large question mark before vanishing into the darkness.

“Nothing I’m eager to share,” I chuckled.

“Care to hear my thoughts?” The Dodo-woman arched an eyebrow, but then her blue eyes flicked to the trail of animal-people in our wake.

“Absolutely.” I nodded.

“You’re worried about your people, and about the battles ahead of us,” Mae guessed as a smile tugged at the corners of her lips. “I am thinking this is merely a sign of your capabilities within the role of leader. A false prophet would not worry so much.”

“I should probably worry a little less,” I said, and I gave her a small smile.

“I like it when you’re confident,” Una interjected, and her face was lit up with adoration. “It makes me feel safe.”

“Alright, then, we got this, ladies.” I inhaled deeply and straightened my shoulders. “There’s nothing we need to worry about with me on your side.”

“That’s our Dreamer!” Mae chortled.

“Oh, Alex, I’m so glad I’m with you and not back in town.” Una squeezed my hand warmly.

“Apologies, Dreamer,” Shelli said as she pushed her way to the front of the procession. “Do you mind if we take a short break? Some are lagging behind.”

“Sure.” I nodded, and then I jerked my chin toward the wall. “Let’s all chill out for a bit.”

Everyone’s shoulders slumped with exhausted relief as they sank in sitting positions against the wall, but I didn’t relax until I’d checked in with each person myself. Some had tired feet, bruised bodies, and were trembling with fear of the dark while others fared better and merely saluted me as I passed by.

Una and Mae helped me pass out some travel rations, but our food supply was dwindling swiftly. We were returning to New Haven when the tunnel had collapsed, and we’d only brought enough for one day of travel. We needed to find an entrance to the surface before another day passed, or my followers would have nothing to eat but dirt.

The water skins were also dwindling in supply, but I didn’t begrudge anyone who took a big drink. We were more likely to find a water source underground than food, but my urgency to get above ground continued to grow as our supplies vanished.

“Are there nightmares down here?” a sparrow-woman named Tora asked.

Like Ida, she had the body of a bird but the head of a woman. She appeared to be middle-aged, and her hair was stripped with russet and brown. Her eyes were timid, and her gaze flitted about like she was expecting an attack at any moment.

“I know very little about where we are and what’s down here,” I explained with an apologetic smile. “We’ll just have to keep a brave face on, stick together, and watch each other’s backs. Think you can help me with that?”

“I will do anything you command, Dreamer.” Tora lifted her chin, and her soft brown eyes met mine. “I would even face down the worst nightmare.”

“You’re braver than most would be,” I complimented. “I won’t make you do anything alone. We’re all in this together.”

“Thank you, Dreamer,” Tora breathed, and relief flooded her gaze.

After everyone had a chance to rest their feet and replenish their energy reserves, we continued on down the dark, winding tunnels. The span between torches grew wider and wider with each one we passed until there were huge swaths of the corridor engulfed in darkness.

If a nightmare was nearby, I wouldn’t be able to even see it.

The thought filled me with dread, but Una remained calm, and I knew she had better night vision than the rest of us. I could sense her peering around as if we weren’t shrouded in shadows, so I kept my hand in hers as a way to quickly sense if something approached.

The only sound I could hear was the shuffling of our feet, labored breaths, the occasional cough, and my heart pounding against my ribcage. I listened closely, and I familiarized myself with the breathing patterns of my companions. Then we rounded a turn, and an orange glow announced the appearance of another torch.

I paused beneath the flickering flames, and I glanced around at my followers with a probing eye. They didn’t look exhausted, but we’d been walking for what felt like hours already, and I could tell no one would argue against taking a break.

“We rest here for a while,” I instructed. “We’ll take the torch with us when we go, that way we aren’t stuck in darkness again.”

“Oh, thank the Dreamer,” Ida breathed.

I allowed as much time as I could stand, but everyone leapt eagerly to their feet once I called the halt to an end. Mae and Una marched on either side of me, and Shelli took up the rear guard. The friesians limped along at the center of our group, and my warriors surrounded them on both sides. Pride swelled in my chest at the formation my followers fell into, and I led them with my head held high.

I held the torch aloft in my fist, but we soon encountered another light, so I gave the additional flame to Shelli. The bear-woman smiled gratefully as she raised the torchlight up above the heads of her neighbors, and the corridor was fully illuminated around us.

We came across a few more junctions, but these ones ran to the left and right, and it didn’t appear as if they would lead to the surface, so I passed them by. I made a mental note of their location just in case we had to double back and retrace our steps, but then I continued the search for a way out.

More tunnels led downward deeper into the depths of the ground, and the cool air radiating from the openings indicated the cave-like atmosphere below. We shivered before one such tunnel as I peered into the entrance, and the gust blowing from the shadows nearly extinguished my torch.

“Look, Alex,” Una gasped from behind me.

I turned to look where the cat-girl pointed, and I saw deep rivulets in the dirt. Crumbles of earth fell away from the marks, which exposed the darker, more moist ground beneath.

“What is it?” I cast Una a questioning glance before I moved closer to take a better look.

“Dig marks,” Mae offered. “Looks like the tunnels were indeed made by some kind of animal.”

I peered at the marks with narrowed eyes, but I had no idea what could do such a thing. There were lots of wild animals on Earth who burrowed into the ground to make their homes, but these tunnels were big enough for three of us to walk side-by-side, and I shuddered at the thought of a gigantic groundhog or a massive gopher.

“A big animal,” I observed.

I scanned over the rest of the walls and the ceiling, and I noticed the claw marks everywhere. The lines were about six inches wide, but they ran in long ridges.

“Or many small ones,” Una said as she came to stand by my side, and she flashed me a sideways smile. “Whatever it is, they’re going to love you, Alex.”

“How can you be so certain?” I shook my head in awe of her utter faith in me.

“I’ve never been more certain of anything as I am about you,” Una countered with a wink. “You’re here to save All-the-land, Alex.”

“Let’s hope whoever made these tunnels feels the same way,” I said, and I raked a hand through my hair.

I gestured for the march down the tunnels to continue, and a few of the friesians tossed their heads in disapproval, so I kept a slow pace. We continued onward into the shadows, but then we found some more torches. I pulled them from the walls and distributed them among my people, but the torches’ existence itself showed a sense of humanity in the tunnel builders.

Wild animals didn’t use torches, after all.

The thought was both reassuring and nerve wracking. On the one hand, if my troop of animal-people warriors was any indication, it was possible we could negotiate with humanoid creatures. On the other hand, if the residents of the tunnels were minions of the Dark King, then we could be walking right into the arms of darkness. If the residents were part of the rebels occupying this section of All-the-land, then it would stand to reason my companions would already know who lived down here, so their lack of knowledge made me extra cautious.

I didn’t speak any of my thoughts out loud for fear of instilling doubt in my followers, and I made sure to keep my body language confident and strong. I had to be an example for them to follow, but at least Mae and Una were by my side. Their mere presence made me feel more powerful and comfortable in my own skin.

“Did you hear that?” Una suddenly asked as her eyebrows furrowed in concern. Her large triangle ears swiveled in all directions, and her poofy tail twitched with nervous energy.

“What?” I asked as I glanced around.

A loud rumbling sound echoed through the tunnels followed by the sound of cracking stone, and then the ground beneath my feet gave way again. Mae, Una, and I tumbled through a massive crater that opened up under our feet, but the rest of my companions were able to hop backward just in time to avoid the cave-in.

The two women rose unsteadily to their feet beside me, and we all coughed as we waved the dust out of the air around our faces. I glanced up at the hole leading to the higher level, and the worried faces of the animal-people warriors peered back at me. I turned to the pile of rubble, and I attempted to climb it, but the dirt crumbled beneath my hands to slide across the tunnel floor.

At the highest point, I still could not reach the hands of my followers, even when I jumped. Each jump also caused the stack to get lower and lower, so I eventually ceased my efforts.

“What do we do, Dreamer?”

“We’re doomed!”

“We’ll be trapped here forever!”

The warriors disintegrated into sobbing women, and they wailed down into the hole as hope fled their eyes. The despair in their gazes made my heart ache, but I didn’t have time to tolerate much blubbering.

“Enough of that!” I called out in a stern voice, and I planted my hands on my hips as I stared up at them. “You are the warriors of New Haven! It’s time you remember what you’re capable of.”

“The Dreamer is right!” Mae added. “I trained you lot better than this! Dry your tears and guard your rears!”

“Yes, Dreamer!”

“Yes, Mae!”

I was satisfied for the moment so I turned to scan over the tunnel we now found ourselves in, but it was much like the one above, except there were no torches within sight.

“We’ll have to search for a way up,” I said in a low voice to Una and Mae. “What should the others do in the meantime?”

“There was that tunnel going down not too far back,” the Dodo-woman pointed out. “We could backtrack to that. It probably connects this pathway to the one above.”

I thought this over. I had no map of the maze-like tunnels, and there was no guarantee the tunnel we’d passed did indeed connect to this lower level, but it was our best chance at getting back to the others. Still, I didn’t want them to get lost without their leaders to guide them, and while they were trained, they didn’t have Una’s superior strength or Mae’s battle knowledge, so in the end I shook my head.

“The others should make camp where they are.” I glanced upward as I spoke, but I kept my voice low. “There’s no telling how long it will take us to find a way up, but I don’t want both groups going in separate directions. If they stay where they are, then we have a better chance of finding them again.”

“Good point, Dreamer,” Mae replied, but she took a long pull on her pipe as she considered my words. “Do you not think I trained the warriors to take care of their companions?”

“Your training is not in question,” I assured her. “But they’ve been looking to us for leadership for a while now, and without us, they may succumb to fear.”

“Better to maintain a defensive position until the vanguard returns,” the Dodo-woman finally agreed, and she nodded into her smoke cloud.

I smiled up at the animal-people clinging to the edge of the hole in the tunnel floor, and their expressions softened slightly.

“You need to stay where you are,” I instructed. “Make camp, set up a perimeter watch, and get some rest. We will find you as soon as we can.”

“Yes, Dreamer.” Shelli gripped her bow tightly in one hand as she saluted with the other. “I will keep everyone safe and well in your absence.”

“Thanks, Shells,” I replied, and I returned the salute before turning back to Una and Mae. “Ready?”

“I go where you go,” Una said.

“We shall emerge victorious over the shadows,” Mae added.

“Whatever that means,” I chuckled, but then I took the lead, and the three of us headed deeper into the shadows of the tunnel.

I cast a glance over my shoulder at the rubble pile that had swallowed up my torch in the fall, but then I grabbed Una’s hand to use as a guide through the darkness. The cat-girl’s tail curled around the back of my legs in a comforting manner, and I released the breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding.

As long as Una and Mae were with me, I could handle anything this crazy dream world could throw my way.

Not too far down the tunnel, the corridor turned at an almost ninety degree angle, but Una peered around the corner to check to see if the way was clear before we continued forward. The walls in this level were more compact, and the dirt was damp to the touch. The smell of moist earth permeated the air, but the atmosphere itself grew thinner and harder to breathe.

“Shallow breaths, Dreamer,” Mae advised, and she gave me a few quick examples, but I couldn’t see very well in the darkness, so she grabbed my hand and placed it upon her bosom. “Follow the rise and fall, like the sun in the sky, the wind in the leaves, and the current of the stream. The breath of life is slow, controlled, and constant. You can tap into it at any time, like magic.”

The Dodo-woman’s words were soothing, but the feel of her soft breasts beneath the palm of my hand was really distracting, and it only served to further my rapid intake of oxygen. If she made note of the increase in my blood pressure, I could not tell, but she made no mention of it. Finally, I was able to focus on my breathing and calm myself, and only then did she release my hand from her chest.

“Makes me wish I had a night vision potion,” I said, but the words were only a partial joke. I’d only brought the one strength potion to face off against the Clover Cards, and I would have given anything to have a magic elixir right about then.

After the breathing lesson, we continued to follow Una through the darkness, but it wasn’t much longer when the cat-girl inhaled sharply.

“What is it?” I asked as she squeezed my hand.

“There’s a room,” Una reported. “And it smells… interesting.”

“Interesting, how?” Mae asked in a whisper as she came closer, and I could hear the Dodo-woman sniffing the air. “It smells like bugs!”

“Bugs?” I laughed. “We’re underground. Of course there’s going to be bugs.”

“Not in this quantity,” Una argued, and I could sense her shaking her head.

“It’s a room full of bugs?” I couldn’t help the disbelief that crept into my voice. “Who would do such a thing?”

“Lots of people eat bugs, Alex,” Una pointed out.

“Yes, they are quite delicious with a bit of gravy,” Mae added.

“I have to see this for myself,” I said, and I felt around for the door.

I found it a moment later, and the wood grain beneath my fingers seemed out of place among the dirt walls of the tunnel, but there was a lever operating as a latch. I lifted the handle and pushed open the door, but the sound of skittering feet and bug noises greeted my ears instantly.

“What the fuck?” I quickly yanked the portal shut, but a few insects crawled over my feet and down the tunnel before I managed to close the door.

“Now, maybe you will trust our noses,” Mae said in a self-satisfied tone.

“I wish we had a torch,” I sighed. “But I’m not sure I would want to see inside that room if I had one.”

“You do not care for insects?” Una asked, and even though I couldn’t make out the details of her face, I knew she was tilting her head in that curious way she had.

“There’s no love lost between us,” I said. “But I’m not freaked out by them or anything. I’ve just never heard of anyone filling an entire room with nothing but bugs before.”

“Perhaps we should harvest some to provide our followers with sustenance,” Mae suggested. “While the friesians are purely grass eaters, the rest may enjoy something akin to meat.”

“That’s alright.” I shook my head, but I wasn’t sure if Mae’s night vision was anywhere close to Una’s. “We should just focus on getting the fuck out of here.”

“It is still an enjoyable experience with you leading us,” Mae offered. “Regardless of your insect aversion.”

“Thanks?” I chuckled, but then I found Una’s hand in the darkness, and I gave it a warm squeeze. “Lead the way, babe.”

“Yes, Alex,” Una murmured, and we continued on into the dark tunnel past the bug room.

There were a few more doors lining the corridor, but I was hesitant to stop and inspect them. After a few cursory sniffs, the two ladies informed me there were various types of food stored within, but my mind had trouble processing the sheer abundance of supplies around us. Whoever had made these tunnels, they were stockpiled well enough to last until the end of time.

“We don’t touch anything,” I warned. “Whoever put this stuff here will probably not appreciate it if we disturb their supplies.”

“Whoever is hoarding this much food definitely needs to share the wealth,” Mae argued, and I could sense her shaking her head as we passed another door. “There’s enough here to feed an army for a lifetime!”

“If the army eats bugs and grubs,” I pointed out.

“True,” Una giggled. “But the bugs will still fill empty stomachs the same as a magic kitchen could.”

When I’d led the people of Havenwood to their new home in the mountains, we’d had to leave behind the magical kitchen that could sense when someone was hungry and prepare them exactly what they were craving. I still had no idea how the thing operated, but the location of the giant sequoia tree the animal-people city was built into was now known to the Clover Cards, and we couldn’t risk facing another attack.

Miss Maggie had done a wonderful job of feeding the people in the absence of the kitchen, but I knew the pig-lady missed the ease of the magic. Once things calmed down, and we managed to make it out of these cursed tunnels, I would return personally to Havenwood to investigate the kitchen further.

In the meantime, there were also bacon, noodle, and various other food trees in All-the-land, and I’d sent my scouts far and wide in search of them. They’d returned with baskets heaping with food, but the harvests would only last so long.

I sighed as the burden of leadership grew heavier as my thoughts continued to wander, and I was so distracted I almost didn’t hear Una’s sharp inhale of alarm.

My hybrid lover squeezed my hand tightly, as much to warn me as to gain strength and courage, but I didn’t have her night vision, so I had no idea what caused her to go on the alert.

Then flames suddenly burst into existence all around us, and I was temporarily blinded by the light. I blinked rapidly to refocus my vision, but when I did, I couldn’t believe my eyes.

“Mole-people!” Mae breathed as her blue eyes widened in the torchlight.

Indeed, there were furry, glassy-eyed men and women wearing plain gray tunics and standing before us with torches held in one hand and spears grasped in the other. Each mole-person’s fist had six long, wide fingers topped with yellowed, curled nails, and their palms resembled shovels. The mole-people surrounding us stood around five feet tall at the highest, but we were vastly outnumbered, and they didn’t appear to be friendly.

“We come in peace,” I said as I held up the palms of my hands in the universal gesture of surrender.

The mole-people didn’t answer, but they lowered their spears in unison and shuffled forward two paces. Una and Mae backed up against my spine, and the three of us eyed our captors nervously while we waited for them to make a move.

The mole-people stared at us in silence, but there was no mistaking the air of violence surrounding them. They had every intention of striking us down where we stood, and I wondered briefly if this would be the end of this fantastical dream, but I desperately hoped not.

One of the mole-people jabbed at me with the butt of his spear, and the wind expelled from my lungs as I fell to my knees.

Fuck.

How was I going to get out of this situation without a potion?