The Complete Implosion of Riverdale

https://youtu.be/LsrMrAAZ5KQ

My beloved Patrons.

The time is finally here.

An evening three years ago, Riverdale humiliated me. 

Today, I take my vengeance.

This is the most fun I've had making a video in a long time. I’ve never fallen out of love with video essays, but i think a medium that is so hooked into your emotions and state of being, means its going to become a lot harder when things are rough. The last two years, for a multitude of different reasons, were rough. 

This was for many reasons, some im happy to get into, some i am not, but buying a house was one of the biggest. I’m the first person to buy a house in Ireland under the profession “youtuber”. What this meant was that there was no precedent for what my job “was” in the eyes of lenders, and despite having a decent monthly income (thank you), the vast majority of banks I went to wouldn't consider me for a mortgage. This multiplied by a truly nightmarish Irish property market meant that when i did find a bank, I grew extremely anxious that if my income from youtube was to drop, they may take it as a sign of instability, and cancel the application. On top of this, michelle was working a job she really, truly hated, mainly for the purposes of keeping the banks happy, and so I’d take it hard when house deals would fall through. One in particular really broke my heart, collapsing four months after we had paid the deposit.

There’s a kind of pressure thats good for creativity, and a kind that is very bad, this was the very bad kind, and I started to feel infinitely more pressure in making vids, which resulted in being tired all the time and making less videos. This compounded with multiple other not good things, my man got cancer (she beat it and is doing great) i was constantly injured and couldn’t train, and experienced several other things that, I really, really wish I hadn’t.

However, in the last few months, particularly after we finally did get a house (one that we both really love), things have, honestly, calmed down a lot, life has been chiller than it has in a long, long time, to the point i don’t really know how to process it. My general level of anxiety is way down, I’ve gotten help with running the business, ( which was in truth slowly crushing me, but that is a post for another day), Im back to training four times a week, and most of all, i really, really loved making this video.

I am so happy with how this video turned out, and I think that’s a direct result of being in a better place, and a HUGE part of that is you guys. Even in video dry periods, the patreon remained strong, and it was one of the few things that kept me sane even when adsense was dropping and i was terrified the bank would cancel the mortgage (which thankfully, never happened). 

I wouldn’t be here without you all.

So genuinely. 

Thank you.

Not sure why I felt a need to explain it all so thoroughly, but i guess i feel like i've alluded to two years being “hard” and now that im in a better place, wanted to level with you guys about what I meant.

I know its been rough for a lot of you this last week, and I wish there was more I can do, but I hope this very silly video gives you an hour of reprieve and comfort.

I need some rest now, but ill be back on the discord soon.

Dokapon streams resume Friday.

More Review Hole coming soon.

Thanks again

John/ SEW