Evan Dorkin

World's Funnest: Earth 3 Sequence Script w/ Original Art by Stuart Immonen and Joe Giella (Pg 22)

Added 2022-06-17 23:14:57 +0000 UTC

In this installment of the ongoing WORLD'S FUNNEST retrospective, we're covering the one-page "Earth 3" sequence. Yeay! I mean, Boo! Because Earh 3...is evil.

Earth 3 is a pretty typical Silver Age concept from DC, basically, a planet where everything is reversed and wrong from what we know on Earth 1 (the main DC universe/world the kiddies were reading about). Earth 3 first appeared in 1964, in Justice League of America #29, and were co-created by Gardner Fox and artist Mike Sekowsky. Unlike the Bizarro World where everything is reversed and wrong, this isn't a surreal, satirical opposite world full of happy lunkheads, but a "good is bad, bad is good" world ruled by happy fascist supervillains who make up an evil Justice League of America called The Crime Syndicate. Instead of shiny, happy Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman, The Crime Syndicate has evil counterparts in Ultraman (not to be confused with the Japanese hero from the Land of Light in Nebula M78, who debuted on Japanese television two years after this dude showed up), Owlman and Superwoman. There's other evil counterparts for The Flash and green lantern and it appears in the decades since other creators have added new characters to the Syndicate. I'm sure there are action figures of most, if not all of them. An evil Atom would be cool only if he was called "Little bastard" or something like that. Anyway, I'm getting off topic. I can't do that too much today, my hands are a wreck. So, "Little Bastard" is the only dumb Crime Syndicate name I'll offer up.

The key to the Earth 3 sequence is basically having someone do a Mike Sekowsky impression and threatening some children, since kiddies were the target audience for these Silver Age comics and superhero analogs threatening kids is always funny. They probably do it on "The Boys", but actually kill the kids. Anyway, don't tell me, I really don't care, I'd watch it if I was interested. That's not a knock on anyone, I'm just not following any TV stuff made after 1990 for some brain rot reason, and I'm burned out on western superheroes. So, nothing personal. I'm friendly with Darrick Robertson, he bought me some Marvel Retro 3.75 inch figures and doomed me to collect them. Anyway, that's a digression, and I'm supposed to not have time for those today. Sorry!

Mike Sekowsky deserves a few sentences, however. He was known for drawing broad, stocky and sometimes squat figures. Sekowsky is an acquired taste for many comics fans, he certainly was for me. I hated his work up until...my thirties? At some point it clicked for me and it worked for me. I just dig the chonkiness, the clunkiness and the wild alien and creature designs in his JLA comics, especially characters like Abnegazer, Rath and Ghast (I always add, "Attorneys At Law" to apend their names, an unfunny joke I still enjoy making and I believe I used for a gag in Bizarro Comics). My reaction to Sekowsky's work is apparently not atypical of many professionals and fans. A story goes that when Sekowsky worked in animation (Hanna-Barbera, primarily), he had a sign outside his cubicle informing younger artists that would come around to meet him something along the lines of "If you're here to tell me you hated my work when you were a kid and love it now, I've already heard it" or something like that.

Anyway, we ended up with two artists for this page, the only instance of our rejecting a finished page. Joey Cavalieri suggested Jon Bogdanove for the art, and he showed me a Superman cover that was blown up to a poster on the wall in a DC office, showing multiple Supermans drawn in various styles by Bogdanove. One of the figures was a Sekowsky-style thick Superman. So, this seemed a great match. The delivered page was a perfectly fine page of comics, but unfortunately, it wasn't the Sekowsky riff we asked for. It really jarred with the script and the concept of the comic. It just didn't fit. I asked Joey if we could replace the page, because we both agreed it wasn't working. I didn't take this lightly, this was one of the more nerve-wracking experiences for me on the project, for two reasons. One, I didn't want to insult the artist. Anyone can have an off day, a miscue, or whatever. It wasn't hacked, it was just not doing the job. Secondly, asking for any extra money to be spent on a comic is like pulling teeth. I was aware WF was not a cheap project, I have no idea what they paid Alex Ross, Frank Miller and some other big shots, but it wasn't what I got paid to draw a JLA annual back-up story, let's put it that way. So I was a-fearing we were stuck with the page that didn't work. Which happens. But I didn't want it to happen, because I'm uptight about things, and was super-uptight about this comic being "right".

Fortunately, Joey went to bat for the project and someone with the power of the purse agreed that the page was off (Carlin or Levitz, I assume) and we got the page redrawn -- by the incredibly talented Stuart Immonen -- who can do just about anything -- no less. To lock in the Silver Age feel, Joey got veteran DC artist/inker Joe Giella to ink over Immonen's excellent Sekowsky cosplay. it's a wonderful little page, and I happen to own the art for it, because Stuart generously gave it to me (the image atop this post was scanned from the original art). So, we ended up a nice mix of old and new on the Earth 3 page, and everything turned out swell in the end. Stuart got the assignment and lovingly clunked up the panels with (slightly) exaggerated brick wall-like Sekowsky figures in (slightly) exaggerated Sekowsky-like positions.

Okay, then, now here's the one-page script. A reminder, as before, these pages are mostly unedited except for typos, and the script format I used in 2000 is not how I would write this today (the SFX isn't numbered, I added the number of panels-per-page for this post and underlined some things, etc).

WORLD'S FUNNEST - LAST IMP STANDING

SCRIPT FOR PAGE 22 - EARTH 3 SEQUENCE

WHAT HAS GONE ON BEFORE:

An argument between Mr. Mxyzptlk and Bat-Mite got out of hand, resulting in the accidental death of Batman, and then the deaths of Superman, Robin, and most of the Silver Age "Earth 1" DC cast of characters. Mr. Mxyzptlk then chased Bat-Mite across the Earth, which ultimately destroyed the planet. Their feud continued into space, where they accidentally obliterated the entire universe. To Mxyzptlk's surprise, Bat-Mite "pops' out of view -- using his inter-dimensional powers to lead Mxy on a chase throughout the various DC dimensions, pasts and futures, starting with the Silver Age Phantom Zone, and then leading to the Golden Age "Earth 2". Both of these places suffered the same fate as Earth1, and we now pick up the chase as it leads to the so-called "Earth 3" -- the alternate universe realm ruled by the Crime Syndicate of America-- an evil, alternate Justice League.

NOTES REGARDING THE ART:

SEKOWSKY -- THICK AND HEARTY!!! Stocky characters in odd wonky poses, especially a thick, barrelchested Ultraman.

PANEL ONE

A good-sized opening panel spread across the top of the page. BAT-MITE "pops" into the air above a city street being attacked by the members of the CRIME SYNDICATE OF AMERICA -- ULTRAMAN, SUPERWOMAN, POWER RING, OWLMAN, and JOHNNY QUICK. Ultraman and Superwoman are cheerfully dismantling an armored car parked outside a bank as Johnny Quick cheerfully whizzes by, carrying away bags of loot marked with "$" signs on them. The side of the armored car is marked KOWSKY ARMORED CAR CO. In the air above them, Power Ring cheerfully uses his power ring (!) to create a giant green hand that punches through the wall of the bank, revealing the vault inside. Meanwhile, Owlman contributes by cheerfully holding up a terrified old lady, who. hands over her purse as he trains a strnge-looking gun on her. Some panicked bystanders can be seen running from the scene, perhaps there's some fires and overturned cars and other signs of destruction depending on how much room we've got here.

1) BAT-MITE (thought balloon): GOSH! THIS EARTH'S JUSTICE LEAGUE IS WREAKING HAVOC! OH, WELL, I GUESS THEY MUST HAVE THEIR REASONS!

SFX (by Bat-Mite) POP!

PANEL TWO

Ultraman and Power Ring approach a nervous-looking Bat-Mite, who's now hovering several feet above the ground. A fairly confused Ultraman is pointing at the imp, who shies away from the sour-looking super-criminals. If there's room in the background, we can see Owlman kicking the old lady he robbed, while she's helpless on the ground.

2) ULTRAMAN: WHAT THE --? LOOK, POWER RING! IT'S AN ELF...DRESSED IN A LOUSY-LOOKING OWL-MAN COSTUME!

3) POWER RING: I SEE HIM, ULTRAMAN! WE'LL TEACH HIM TO MOCK A MEMBER OF THE CRIME SYNDICATE OF AMERICA!

PANEL THREE

Ultraman, Owlman, Power Ring and Johnny Quick surround Bat-Mite and gang up on him, beating the hapless little imp up pretty badly. Johnny Quick's strikes him with blurred "multiple hands" while Power Ring uses his power to make a "giant hand" to slap Bat-Mite around. In the background Superwoman holds up two terrified children -- a boy and a girl, one in each hand held up by their shirts.

4) BAT-MITE: C-CRIME SYNDICATE? OW! BUT AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO BE -- OOF! -- THIS WORLD'S JUSTICE LEAGUE?! OW!

5) SUPERWOMAN: BAH! WE HATE THE JUSTICE LEAGUE AND EVERYTHING THEY STAND FOR! HERE ON EARTH 3 WE USE OUR SUPER-POWERS TO SPREAD TERROR AND IMPOSE OUR WILL!

6) CHILDREN: DON'T KILL US, SUPERWOMAN -- WE LOVE AND FEAR YOU!

PANEL FOUR

Suddenly, and to everyone's surprise, MR. MXYZPTLK "pops" in -- breaking up the Silver Age beat-down. NOTE: Mr Mxyzptlk appears as he did in the early 60's Silver Age.

7) MXY: HANDS OFF! NOBODY MANGLES THAT LITTLE PEST BUT ME!

8) ULTRAMAN: OH, IS THAT SO? WELL, LITTLE MAN, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT?

SFX (by Mxy) - POP!

PANEL FIVE

To the Crime Syndicate's horror, Mr. Mxyzptlk raises his glowing hands up, making raking gestures that magically -- and literally -- tear the fabric of Earth 3's reality apart. The scene beyond the two imps shreds apart like paper and some sections rip completely off and fall away, including a piece bearing the terrified image of Power Ring. Behind the torn sections we can see a blank white background.

9) MXY: OH, I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE SOMETHING CRAZY -- LIKE THIS!

10) ULTRAMAN: GREAT KRYPTON -- H-HE'S TEARING THE UNIVERSE APART!

11) BAT-MITE: GEE, THANKS, MXY!

SFX - RRRRIP

SFX- RIIP

PANEL SIX

An angry Mxy takes a hefty swing at Bat-Mite -- which to his surprise passes right through the Mite's fading image, which is surrounded by a "popping" burst effect similar to those used in the old 60's comics. The imps are on an all-white blank background now, as fluttering pieces of shredded "paper" bearing fragmented images from the previous panel fall all arund them. The image fragments do not include the imps, and, if possible, one or two should show the horrified faces of Crime Syndicate members.

12) MXY: DON'T THANK ME, YOU MISERABLE MITE -- HEY!

13) BAT-MITE: YEE-OICKS!

SFX (by burst) POP!

Bonus trivia: I named a character in Welcome To Eltingville after Mike Sekowsky. Although he was unnamed in the aired pilot. "Sekowsky" was the comic shop regular wearing an eyepatch. In the show his accent would have switched -- for no apparent reason -- from Russian to Scottish and back again. You can see Sekowsky in this group show below, from the opening credits sequence.