Groceries with Gene- part 3 (Short Story)

     A muttered conversation seeped through the slit of light under Ace’s door. Rory cackled, Jobie accused, and someone’s body thudded on the carpet again, shuffling around the living room. They would laugh, or yelp, and batman made a quip on the television.

     Ace’s long limbs were curled into himself, cupped close to his body in a spiral on his bed. The air under his silky covers was now warm and thin from keeping his deep breathing trapped inside. It was late into the night now, and Gene had certainly gone to bed. An hour earlier, Ace had heard him brushing his teeth in the bathroom, and after he went to his room his hefty steps around the house had gone still. Despite Gene often coming to check on him after an outburst, Ace felt that he would be left abandoned tonight.

     He hoped that Gene would not come visit him.

     From the living room, a deeper voice entered the conversation. Rory responded, and Gene’s voice questioned. Jobie responded, and Gene hummed. Then, heavy steps neared Ace’s door and the slit of light was cut in two by a pair of legs.

     A thick knuckle knocked on the door, and the beating in Ace’s ears quickened. He did not respond.

     The door creaked open behind Ace. Gene breathed deep and slow through his nose, and ice in a glass cup clinked. The lump on the mattress stayed completely still, and the door closed. The ice clinking around in its glass neared, placed on the flat surface of a wooden dresser, and the mattress dipped behind Ace.

     “Aye,” Gene said.

     Ace said nothing. A warm hand pressed on the covers and sunk against Ace’s rib, putting a weight against Ace. Gene rubbed his thumb back and forth. Ace began to cry.

     While he wept, the man behind him kept his hand firm on his side and didn't try to move the covers.

     “I’m sorry,” Ace said.

     “I know.” Gene replied.

     For a while, neither man said anything until Ace sniffed and began to shift. He sat up but stayed with his back to Gene and his face turned away. A glass of water was offered to him.

     “No, I’m okay. Thank you,” Ace said. Gene didn't move his hand away, and Ace took the glass. He pictured his own face while he was in the kitchen, yelling. “Gene, I’m sorry.”

     “I know.”

     “Did I hurt his feelings?” Ace asked. “Is he mad?”

     “Maybe.”

     Ace looked down at the water. The cold streams on his cheeks went warm again as a new tear would slide. He took a sip of the water.

     “What did I say? I just-… I didn’t mean it.”

     Gene didn't answer. He placed his hand on Ace’s thigh.

     “I know I sound insane, I just really felt like you both replaced me. Both of you. I know you haven't- but it doesn't feel like it,” Ace said. He looked at Gene, and when Gene was staring back at him he looked away. “I’m so sorry. I don’t mean that- I’ve been really selfish.”

     “Mm,” Gene shifted. “Cmere.”

     Gene began to lay down, and Ace hesitated. He still kept his face away from Gene, feeling a heavy guilt set in his chest as his lover obediently stayed with him despite how late it was. Ace stayed still, and Gene waited.

     The fan above them whirred and Gene's breathing was slow.

     Ace slowly shifted his body. He placed the water cup on his nightstand, then carefully laid his head on Gene’s plush shoulder. Gene’s thick arm wrapped around Ace’s torso to pull him closer, their bodies clicking together like a puzzle. Ace adjusted his head onto Gene’s chest and studied the whirr of Gene’s breathing, consistent like a working machine.

     Gene’s wide palm slowly rubbed up and down Ace’s back.

     “Aye, you’re my boy,” he said. “I will be here.”

     “... Okay,” Ace replied. He closed his eyes, studying his weight against Gene’s body. “I think I should apologize.”

     “Mhm.”

     “Would he be mad if I did?”

     “Maybe.”

     “What did I say?”

     Gene did not reply. Ace opened his eyes again.

     “You should go to bed,” Ace said.

     “Mmh.”

     “I’m not trying to keep you up, I’m sorry. It’s okay if you want to go sleep.”

     Gene kissed the top of Ace’s head and shifted to get more comfortable. He held Ace against himself, and kept his eyes closed. The fan above them whirred, a cricket outside chirped, and Gene’s nose whistled subtly.

     “Thank you,” Ace said. Gene squeezed him.

    Ace had stirred awake in the early morning when the man under him began to scoot and press away from Ace. Ace rolled over and laid the back of his wrist over his eyes, then let out a raspy whine. Thick warm fingers slid to cup his cheek. A kiss was placed on his forehead. He stayed in best and dipped in and out of dreaming while the home around him became active. Pots clattered, breakfast sizzled, and the TV told the news. Soon, Jobie was talking to Gene- not using a morning voice- and then Rory.

     Ace opened his eyes, studying the tone of voice each boy had. Rory would laugh, Jobie would raise his voice with a smile, and Gene would respond. He wondered if they had talked about him yet, and what he did. He then felt that he was incredibly selfish.

     Gene had brought him a plate of food and a new glass of water. They kissed, and Gene left for work. When he returned, he once again brought Ace a new cup of water, and a plate of food.

    In the late evening, Ace finally emerged from his room when the conversations in the house had gone silent. Ace rounded around the short hallway into the living room where the house glowed with dim lighting. The lamps had been flicked on as the sun had set, and then abandoned. To Ace’s relief, everyone was in the backyard. Ace gazed out of the window behind the couch to see Rory and Gene laying together in the hammock. It swayed back and forth as Rory fussed and their legs were entangled trying to fit in the same space together.

     And Jobie was sitting on the patio with his knees touching, watching them. He was picking apart a strand of grass.

     Ace sighed through his nose and tucked a piece of hair behind his ear.

     The back door unsealed from the frame and gaped open, then the mesh outer door creaked as it was carefully pried open. Jobies head turned and Ace could see an amber eye watching him from behind sleek brown hair. Ace felt his own height and his own thin legs as he approached Jobie. He felt the silk pajamas hug his boney knees as he sat down- he must’ve looked like a very tall toddler. He wondered if Jobie thought he was ugly. Or if Jobie thought he was embarrassing.

     “What,” Jobie said.

     “Hey,” Ace replied. “Are you doing okay?”

     “Yes.”

     “Oh- okay.”

     And they both sat together in silence. Ace picked at his silk and Jobie stripped a flat piece of grass like string cheese. The crickets were singing and a muddled conversation carried from the hammock across the backyard.

     “I just wanted to… Sometimes I say a lot of things and I don't mean them,” Ace said.

     “Why?” Jobie asked.

     “I don't know,” Ace replied.

     “... What.”

     Ace scratched his ear and looked away. He then looked forward again.

     “I’m sorry.”

     “Yea, whatever.”

     “I am. I’m sorry, I didn't mean anything I said.”

     “Well you said it,” Jobie said.

     “I know, I’m sorry.”

     “Yea…”

     “I’m working on it.”

     “You hate me.”

     Ace said nothing. He looked at Jobie, and Jobie kept his face forward. However, he was side eyeing Ace as though Ace wouldn't be able to tell as long as his head was still forward.

     “I don't hate you.”

     “Liar.”

     “I don’t,” Ace said. “… I don't know, I just don't know you. I’m sorry.”

     “Well…”

     Ace sighed through his nose, that frustration swirling in his chest again. It was quieter and subtle.

     “I’m just sorry,” he said.

     “Okay.”

     “Okay?”

     “Yea. I’ll figure it out,” Jobie said.

     Ace stared at him, brows furrowed in slight confusion. Jobie began to stand, rubbing his hands together to speckle the patio with leftover grass bits.

     “We are making hot chocolate,” Jobie said.

     “What? Oh- Gene and Rory?”

     “No. You.”

     “Oh…”

     Ace stood as Jobie headed back into the home. The mesh metal door clattered behind him, and he left the main door gaping. Ace glanced back at the hammock where Gene had been watching them with his head propped on his arm. He gave Ace a thumbs up. Ace looked away and headed into the house.