Lith's Diary - April

Dear Diary,
I've been super busy this month, but it's been better than last month, at least. We're really well into 2017, aren't we? I think I said that I believed this year would be a big one for achieving new things. I guess I'm not sure if I feel like that's held up so far. I've been managing to get by, but nothing really big and impressive, to look back and be proud about. But there's still lots of time, right? I've got a few things going that might count, if they turn out well. I just have to keep my head on straight, and not spend too much time playing video games.

I mentioned Kerbal Space Program last time. That's actually turned into a pretty big time sink, I realized. Finding just the right way to pull out of orbit, and docking and all this stuff I'm learning to fine tune-- it all takes a lot of time! I've been pretty dismayed at how many times I realized I'd lost hours just trying to get one silly little thing done. I've had to put the game down. It feels kinda bad to stop when I'm just on the verge of a big new achievement --going out to another actual planet for the first time-- but I've been on the verge of that for a long time without quite feeling like I was ready to even attempt it properly. The mun and minmus are pretty much old hat to me, though, so I guess you could say I've accomplished a lot compared to the last time I played. Maybe in a year or two I'll come back and conquer half the solar system!

Other than that... I've been touching on a few different games, really, but none very much. I jumped back into Overwatch with the big event they've got going on. Normally the game is all about fighting other players, which can be stressful but satisfying, but they introduced this new game mode that's cooperative, with a small team of players fighting off hordes of robots. It's been pretty fun! It kinda feels like a blatant ripoff of a similar mode in Team Fortress 2, though-- you remember, I mentioned that game a while back? Overwatch always felt like it was based on TF2 to a strong degree, and this new mode seems to borrow a lot from that, though it's not as elaborate. Still, it's been fun, and a decent change of pace. And it's a lot easier to get loot boxes like that!

The game rewards you for playing by giving you experience, and every X experience you get a loot box, which has random stuff like new character skins in it. Rather, it has skins, and then a bunch of junk you generally don't care about. This big event added new items you can get, but it's mostly been really disappointing. Like, there are a few skins that would be really nice to have, and then just tons and tons of silly junk that you don't want! So it's like... the mode makes it easier to get loot boxes, but it feels like the boxes aren't as good as they should be? I dunno. At least the gameplay is fun anyway. I hope they keep this mode around.

Been touching a couple other games here and there, but I might talk more about those later, after I've played a bit more. Oh! I've been enjoying a book series I've long read through several times. I don't think I've mentioned it before? It's called the Wheel of Time. To be honest... it has a lot of flaws. It can be extremely repetitive at times, and some of the characters have gotten more annoying rather than less going through the series again. But it's comfortable, and somehow really satisfying, even so. I grew up reading these books, and I've been shocked to realize how much of an effect they've had on me, when I go through them now and make connections with how I grew up. It's kinda embarrassing, really. I emulated some of the characters in ways I probably shouldn't have, just because they seemed to be highlighted as examples of how a person can be great. It makes me think a lot about how our stories and such, especially those presented to the young, can have a big impact on how they perceive the world and how they should act in it. It makes me worry, and it makes me want to try and make something better for our future. I don't know. It's been strange going through the same series I enjoyed long ago.

I say going through rather than read because I've been listening to them as audio books! It's actually very well done for this series, and it makes it a lot easier to go through the books while doing other things. I've really been enjoying it. I do think I need to do more real reading, though-- I feel like my spelling has been suffering a little, with how little I've been reading proessionally published works with my own eyes lately. I used to be really proud of my spelling!

That's just as important as working to improve. We have to work sometimes to make sure we keep up skills we keep for granted. And that can be humbling, to realize we have to work just to keep up what we've already got. I guess that in a way, that means we might have a limit in how good a person we can be, according to how much we can work to maintain. But we can always strive to push that as far as we can, and to let the things we don't like in ourselves fade so there's more room for all the things we want to be. We can all get closer to what we want to be, with time and a little work.

I guess that's part of what we're doing in the void, really. Trying to find someplace, some way for me to become what I want to be. It's... not working very well so far. But I think if we push past the problems, we can find a way. As long as you're there with me. Thank you for helping me, Diary. For helping Lithier bring us together, and for being there when things are so strange and uncomfortable as well as when it's fun and... p-pleasant. That's how you know who your real friends are, right?

So, thank you. I know you're one of my closest friends. And together, we'll get through all of this, and find... a better ending. Hand in hand. Paw in paw.

See you soon!
-Lith