Puss In Boots: The Troll Job (Alts Included)

Puss In Boots, after his death-defying journey for the wishing star, is on a new adventure, rekindling an old flame and getting big enough to take on a whole army of trolls- typical hero work.

This one includes a NSFW alt for this story, so enjoy!

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Puss In Boots, dashing swordsman and heroic outlaw, was a changed cat. His brush with death and the last wishing star was behind him, and he was ready to live his last life to its fullest. Right now, he was lounging in the back of a wagon, driven by Perrito, his dog and best friend, and guided by Kitty Softpaws, who was more than a friend- probably.

"That one, there," Puss said, pointing to a cloud in the sky. "Looks like a sword."

Kitty rolled her eyes. "You think they all look like swords, Puss."

"Not true! He thought one looked like his boots," Perrito replied cheerfully.

Puss frowned. "Forgive me, I thought I was supposed to learn how to smell the roses, no? Wasn't that all a part of appreciating life?"

"You're supposed to smell the roses, sure, but that doesn't mean you have to become boring," Kitty quipped.

"Boring?" Puss shot up from where he sat. "You call Puss In Boots, boring?"

"Well… you have been pretty quiet," Perrito said. "You don't even tell stories anymore, you just… kinda lay there."

Puss scowled at both his friends. "Well I am sorry, I am hired for my expertise for fighting, not entertaining. Where are we, anyways?" He demanded, looking over the rolling hills and green plains they found themselves in- there was a river nearby, and a dense forest ahead of their road.

Kitty glanced down at the map. "Ah, it looks like we're near the town of Kingsbridge?"

Puss whipped around. "What? Kingsbridge, are you certain?"

Perrito quirked his head. "What's wrong with Kingsbridge?"

"It is smack dab in the middle of troll country!"

"So?" Kitty asked. "You've never been scared of trolls."

Puss shook his head. "No, no! It is not the trolls I am worried about- it is their hunters. Kingsbridge is home to the Billy Goats Gruff Posse- they protect Kingsbridge from trolls, and I used to run with them in one of my past lives."

"Which life?" Kitty demanded.

"My fourth. The one with the…" he mimicked flexing his arms.

"Oh! The buff one," Kitty nodded, smirking. "I liked that look- I don't mind a man with some brawn on him. Shame you let yourself stay so skinny otherwise."

"I am not skinny. Puss In Boots is lithe- lean, and athletic! And strong, like the bull!" Puss countered, puffing up his chest.

"Yeah, Kitty, Puss is a great sword fighter, and a hero- he doesn't let being skinny slow him down!" Perrito chimed in brightly.

"Perrito, just drive," the cat groaned, running a paw over his face.

"So, what happened with you and the Gruff Posse?" Kitty asked.

"Eh, it was the old Puss In Boots, no?" Puss shrugged. "My head got too big, I wanted to be the legend. I tried taking out the trolls on my own, but it didn't work out so well. The eldest brother, Griff, took it… poorly. We were close."

Kitty arched her brow. "Close?"

It was Puss' turn to smirk. "I didn't just steal your heart across eight lives, you know."

Kitty rolled her eyes, swiping Puss' feathered hat and playing keep-away with the other cat until they rolled into town. The three travelers stopped their wagon and stared- Kingsbridge was in ruins. It was, as Puss remembered, a thriving and hardy town that had a posse of equally hardy warriors to keep the trolls at bay- now, half the houses were caved in by rubble and giant boulders.

"Woah… what happened here?" Perrito asked.

Puss sighed. "These are the signs of-"

"A troll attack," a deep, burly voice finished. The reins of their wagon and horse were snatched out of Perrito's paws by a strong hand, held by a very large goat. His coarse white fur was littered with scars and knicks, and covered a musclebound body. The goat's arms were thickly roped with brawn, his chest and shoulders wide, and his legs sturdy as oaks. His curved horn were tipped in steel points, and he wore an eyepatch over his left eye. "Puss."

"...Griff," Puss finally conceded to the goat, cringing slightly.

"Never thought I'd see you in my town again, Puss In Boots." He nodded to Kitty and Perrito. "Friends of yours?"

"Si," Puss said. "Kitty Softpaws and Perrito, this is Griff- leader of the Goats Gruff Posse."

Griff scoffed at that. "I'm just the sheriff in these parts. You two- go take your wagon over to the Drunken Troll Tavern, tell Cal Griff sent ya. And you, Puss, come to my office- we'll share a drink."

"Oh, we're not going anywhere without Puss," Kitty said, narrowing her eyes.

"Well, it's my town, so you'll do what I say- and I want to talk to Puss here, alone."

Kitty bared her fangs, unsheathing her sword, but Puss put a paw on her arm. "Kitty, it's alright. Griff is a friend- he wouldn't double cross us."

"I think he looks nice!" Perrito nodded, sniffing the air around the burly goat. "He smells nice. Like oak trees. And bacon grease!"

Griff arched his brow at the dog. "Is he for real?"

"Yes, unfortunately," Kitty said, but then glared balefully at Griff. "Go have your drink- but I'm watching you, Sheriff. You hurt Puss, I'll do to you ten times what you do to him."

"Charming lady," Griff muttered, as Puss parted ways with his friends.

"You have no idea," Puss said, shaking his head as they walked into the Sheriff's office, half the walls heavily damaged. "The troll attacks are getting worse."

"You have no idea," Griff muttered, grabbing a bottle. He fixed two shots for them, sliding a glass of leche over to Puss. "Damn, you got skinny. What happened, man? You used to be the biggest cat I knew."

"Eh, new life, new me," Puss shrugged. "How are Gruffy and Geoff?"

Griff furrowed his brow, looking down. "That's why I wanted to talk to you. I knew you were coming to town- some scouts spotted your wagon two days out." Griff screwed his eyes shut, thick arms tensing as he gripped the table. "Gruffy and Geoff were captured by the trolls. It's why the attacks are getting worse- it's only me defending the town, and they're getting more aggressive." He looked up to Puss. "And you're going to help me get them back."

The cat looked at Griff, downing his drink. "Well, of course. Puss In Boots never turns down a cry for help."

"Don't give me that crap, Puss, you're gonna help me get my brothers back and-" Griff stopped. "Wait, what?"

Puss nodded. "Of course I'll help you. I owe you, for what happened last time. I ran out on you and the posse, this is the least I can do."

"Oh. Really? Just like that?" Griff blinked. "You have changed. I had this whole bad cop routine planned… I'm sorry."

Puss chuckled good naturedly. "It is alright, my old friend- if you want, I can say no and you can convince me."

"No, no- I'm sorry because I wasn't gonna give you a chance to say no. When I heard you were coming to town, I knew you'd be my best shot to get my brothers back- so I drugged your drink."

Puss frowned, then laughed again. "Oh. Oh! And that is why Puss In Boots is seeing two of you, Griff! Ah, that is a relief. I think I will lie down for a bit now." Suddenly, the cat swooned and fell unconscious, slipping out of the chair and planting his face on Griff's floor.

Puss snorted awake, sitting straight up in bed. Blinking in the morning light, he looked around. He was in his old room, the one above the Drunken Troll Tavern. He recognized it instantly- his mirror and weights were exactly where he had left them, a few posters from his Circus Strongman days… he shook his head, throwing off the covers, and then he caught a look at himself in the mirror.

He had a strange dream that had somehow prepared him for this, as the cat looking back at him was as impressively built as he had ever been, tabby orange fur carpeting thickly roped limbs and a broad, beefy chest that bounced on command. His dream had been, for lack of a better word, stimulating, and was all about his body swelling and power building up inside him, but now that wasn't just some dream. He was just as muscular as he had been five lives ago- and for a brief moment, he seriously considered if those five lives after the weightlifting accident had been a dream… but then his door opened, and Perrito came skittering in.

"Oh, you're awake, Puss!" Perrito stopped, gasping with eyes wide. "And you're huge! What happened?"

The cat hadn't taken his eyes off his reflection, curling his arm and flexing, a bristling mound of a bicep rising up to meet him. "...I have no idea."

Kitty was at the door now as well, her eyes going wide. "Oh my. Puss…" her tail flicked this way and that. "You're looking good."

Puss finally turned away from his bulging arm muscles and to his two companions. "We must go to the sheriff's office. I must speak with Griff at once! I will explain on the way."

As the three trotted across town, Kitty shook her head after Puss' explanation. "So let me get this straight- you old friend tried to force you to help him and drugged your drink, and possibly did… all this to you," she recited, gesturing to the male cat's rippling musculature. "And you still want to help him?"

"His brothers are being held hostage by trolls. I owe him- and them. We were all brothers-in-arms, once," Puss explained. They reached the sheriff's office, and Puss delivered a swift kick to the door with his booted heel- he underestimated his strength, as his thick thighs coiled with power and then knocked the door right off its hinges. The door hit the floor with a loud crash, catching the attention of the muscular goat inside, Griff instantly looking up and ready for a fight.

"Griff! How do you explain all this?" Puss demanded, gesturing to his augmented body.

"Wow. I'll be- it actually worked," the goat grunted, moving to meet his guests. "I didn't know if I could trust a magic brew, but… wow. You look just as strong as you ever were."

"That is besides the point!" Kitty shouted. "If you wanted our help, you could have asked. You've drugged Puss and tricked him, how are we supposed to trust you now?"

Griff sighed. "Look, I need Puss to be as strong as he was back in the day- sure, he's always been good with a sword, but I need him sturdy enough to take a punch from a troll. Like the old days," he looked to Puss apologetically. "I am sorry, though. I suppose you would've taken the potion if I had offered and explained…"

"Possibly, yes," Puss said, crossing his thick arms.

"It is a good potion, though… and me apologizing isn't going to get my brothers free any sooner. So, what do you say? Do you want to test the limits of this new body?" Griff asked.

The cat narrowed his eyes. "What did you have in mind?"

Puss In Boots had accomplished many fantastic feats in his career, pulled off many death-defying stunts and won more than his fair share of battles- but there was some simple and primal pleasure in erasing obstacles in his way through sheer force. Griff wanted to kill two birds with one stone- Puss got to test the limits of his strength, and he got his town cleaned up. Perrito and Kitty managed the wagon, filling it up with debris, and Puss was lifting the boulders thrown into Kingsbridge's buildings. Whatever magic was packed into that potion was potent, as every time he tested his strength, he dipped into increasingly deep reserves of power- and it had not escaped his notice his muscles had only grown as the day had gone on; nor anyone else's notice, for that matter.

Puss huffed, and his chest rose and pushed forward like the tide coming in. The exertion, the adrenaline, the amped up, pumped up energy flowing through his veins was intoxicating. Every bit of stone he tore off from rubble, every boulder he lifted up, his strength increased to meet up to it. His shoulders spread out wide, his back teeming with new, meaty muscle that stretched out like wings. Somehow, his boots stretched to accommodate his pillar-like legs, his belt girding a thickened waist and brick-like abs- as well as keeping his impressive manhood decent. His feats of strength, tossing boulders like toys, had certainly sated his ego and wowed the crowds.

But it wasn't enough, not for Puss- the cat knew, his newfound strength or no, trolls would be a tough battle, and after his experience in the Dark Forest, he wasn't leaving anything to chance. The boundless energy hadn't been spent by hauling stone all day- and he was burning it off in Kingsbridge's training yard, testing his steel against troll-sized dummies, ones he had designed with the Gruff brothers. He grunted in frustration, however- being three times the cat he used to be was throwing off his balance, and his sword felt like a toy in his hand.

"Puss? What're you doing?" Griff lumbered over to the cat. Though the goat still stood taller than him, the sheer mass between the two had evened out considerably- in fact, the goat had a sneaking suspicion the cat had more brawn packed on to his frame than himself.

"Training," Puss grunted. "It is… proving difficult."

Griff smirked. "You more n' tripled in size, ate, what, four whole hogs throughout the day? I'm surprised you're still standing." He draped his muscled arm over Puss' broad shoulders. "You've done enough for one day."

Puss arched a brow, looking up at the goat. "Griff… things are different, now. I'm different. I wasn't… I wasn't so good to you."

"I know."

The cat nodded. "Well,I am sorry."

The goat grinned, patting his broad back. "It's alright. Yer here now. And I trust you'll help get my brothers back."

A small purr escaped Puss' mouth, leaning back against Griff's arm and rolling the bulges of muscle along his back.

"I missed you, you know."

Puss nodded, his chin hitting the crest of his pecs. "I… missed you too."

Griff reached around Puss' bullneck and unclasped his cape, beginning to rub his hill-sized shoulders. "You look good big. A hero oughta have some heft on 'im. Larger than life, y'know?"

Puss breathed in deeply, his chest rumbling as it inflated. "Where did you get that potion, anyways?"

Griff shrugged. "The Fairy Godmother. Y'know, when she was still in business. Whole town chipped in. It was supposed to be for an emergency, and well, with Gruffy and Geoff gone…"

Puss dipped out of the shoulder rub, turning to face Griff. "Hey." He bunched up his fist, lightly punching the goat's cheek. "We'll get them back. I swear it, on my honor."

They stood close to one another, the two muscled animals avoiding each others' eyes as their beefy chests pressed against each other. "So… Kitty Softpaws." Griff began. "Is she… or you and her…?"

Puss grinned crookedly. "We almost married."

"Almost?" the goat asked searchingly.

"It is a long story. But we are… well, we're taking things slow and… open-ended."

"Open-ended?"

Puss' grin widened as he leaned in against Griff, their pecs grinding against one another. "Si, Cabro."

Griff draped his arms over those broad feline shoulders again, the goat's own prodigious biceps pressing against Puss' cheeks. "Then… perhaps we can train a bit more, together? Some endurance training, to finish the night off?"

The deep purr rumbling out of Puss' chest may as well have belong to a lion. He hooked his arms around the goat's waist, his surging biceps digging into his sides as he hoisted him up, carrying Griff bridal style. "Si. I think I can handle that… if you can, Cabro. Puss In Boots is a big cat, now… with a big legend to tell."

The goat reached down, yanking the cat's belt off. "I can't wait to see how big, Gato."