dev log #30, The Big Shift

After a Very Hectic couple of weeks, I'm sitting down writing you on my new puter AND after my first day back at uni! Well, I'm not really in the program I want to study yet because I was way past the due date of applying, but thanks to a student counselor that truly had my back, I'm in some side-classes until May just so I could get the student status and the benefits that come with it. Part one of that is me being able to quit my sidejobs (well, not so much quitting as just not taking on any more assignments currently, I might still dabble if money gets tight), and part two is me being able to apply for student apartments. It is a huge weight off my back as even with the heater here, it is extremely drafty and I genuinely don't think I can last the winter. This house was not meant to live in, certainly not over winter. The worst part about it is that the cold seems to have dragged back nana's joint pain (she previously had backpain only, which is now in her hips.) and my poor girl is now limping after a long nights sleep. She's straddling the divide into seniorhood, cute as a button with a snoot that grows gray... But my heart aches. I'm sure you can surmise that I have been worrying myself raw over how I'm going to keep her healthy with my budget. I can barely touch the raw and jagged edges of those thoughts. But we make due and I have talked to a vet and bought supplements and if it gets worse, she might get scheduled for a surgery. Speaking of surgery, my mom is replacing her hip too, next monday. After her heartfailure a few years ago now, it has turned into a moderately risky surgery. Gah. Just nerves, nerves, nerves. I'm trying to keep my cool about it all.

Alas! I'm not here just to lament over the hardships. After all, I have started on a very hopeful trajectory and I have my computer which means that, yes, I have started on ouro's development again! For about a week now, I have designated a little while every evening to look through my old code (terrible) and rewriting a new skeleton (very neat), and I have been in talks with a dev over at the lemmasoft forums who is helping me with the phone optimization, which I struggled with immensely the first time I gave Ren'py a go, right after finishing the draft. The reason I went with ren'py over twine was just that, the ability to natively code something suitable for phones. Either way, besides that, the writing bug has scurried across the grey matter in my skull several times, finding scenes and emotions for book 2 (not entirely helpful as I'm thoroughly working on book 1 still, but...) in crooks and corners I wasn't even aware of. It has been a balm for my soul. If you missed my post on tumblr, I posted a sneak peek:

And because I love you, here's another peep, from book one:
TW ancient corpses of children. 

 mmmm, the guilt I'm lashing the pathfinder with is well and truly a feast for the broken.

I really miss my characters as they are in Ouro, and I genuinely can't wait to get over the hump of the logistics of UI and the under-the-hood-coding and start rewriting the first act. The way I work is that I just go section by section and code in whatever is needed for the first pages, which if you remember the demo, is very technically heavy in the first bit where you basically set up your character. Not much is going to change up until you meet Id, but after that, the trajectory of your arrival to the Hedge is very different, and more so propelled by an internal need rather than external.

Anyway, that's it for now. I wish I had more, but for now, a biweekly dev log is all I can manage. I am so optimistic for the time ahead, though, as I feel pushed into a fast-paced motion that I have resisted for years. Let's just cross our fingers that I can finally find my own place to call home, where I can build this new life and give comfort to both my sweetheart doagy, and myself. Look at this pic. Gods, I would give my life to keep her forever.

I hope you are all doing well, and please, feel free to write me anytime if there's anything. I'm still getting over the weird feelings of being an online persona, and I never know if I'm doing the right thing. If you feel like something is missing, please tell me. I'm kissing both of your cheeks and putting the kettle on. See you soon. xx