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Chapter 83 - Specter

The next morning, there was a stir across campus. Students huddling to talk in hushed voices, then disbanding. Paranoid glances cast out. A tension in the air. It was mostly sixth years gathering, but the talk was spreading to the lower classes.

“…heard they found him dead,” she heard one person say.

“In his home?”

“Yeah. And all the neighbors all heard the screaming. But by the time the guard got there, whoever did it was gone.”

It didn’t take a genius to start putting together who it was. Mirian was hiding in Valen’s room when she burst in and said, “They killed Nicolus!”

“Yeah,” Mirian said, and continued staring at the floor.

“This wasn’t an assassination. I mean, it was, but they’re not trying to be subtle. They could have disappeared him, that’s the usual thing to do if you just want someone out of the way. No, they were trying to send a message.”

“To me,” Mirian said.

With her aura nearly depleted purely from how much she was using her major illusion spell just to walk around Torrviol, Mirian knew she needed to change something. The problem was, the person hunting her knew her name, knew where to find her, and could easily leverage that to find out more. Likely, he knew her entire class schedule; the registrar’s office wouldn’t exactly be hard for the dozens of spies to infiltrate given they already had keys to the whole damn Academy. And clearly, he knew her friends as well.

Simply living under an illusion spell wouldn’t be enough. She thought she had an idea of how Professor Marva was doing it, and it wasn’t just ‘more practice.’ If she could obtain a more permanent disguise….

Mirian went to visit Xipuatl. She needed to get his help before it was too late.

When Xipuatl opened the door to his apartment, Mirian first felt relief.

Then, she saw the smirk on his face. “Just give up,” he said, in a voice that wasn’t at all Xipuatl’s.

Mirian raised her force shield as the pistol came out. It wasn’t strong enough to stop the bullet entirely, but it did absorb most of the first shot, and by now, she was used to that spike of pain—she could fight through it. She lashed out with a lift object that snatched away his pistol, and that’s when she felt the line of fire stab through her back.

She lay on the doorstep in agony. With tremendous effort, she turned her head to look back. There were two cloaked figures opposite the building, one wielding a wand, the other a rifle. The rifle cracked out—

***

Mirian woke, teeth grinding, and stared at the wall.

One thing was becoming clear: the cycles clearly didn’t end when she died, and this other time traveler was using the extra time to figure out more about her and plan out counter-moves while she was dead. It was also clear if he kept doing this, he’d end up with an advantage in information and power. The why didn’t make sense to her. She was trying to stop the apocalypse. What in the five hells was he trying to do?

The other question was: how many time travelers were involved? Most of the people involved were Akanan spies, the Torrviol Guard, or people on the Akanan blackmail list. None of them had done anything to indicate they had foreknowledge before. Right now, she only had firm evidence for at least two: This new intruder, and someone who was leading a revolt in Persama. However, there was no reason to assume that was it.

It meant she had to fundamentally change her strategy. Right now, she’d been outmaneuvered, and it was because she’d been burning through the cycles like a forest fire. Even if she’d learned about another time traveler, she would have assumed they’d be trying to stop the end of the world with her.

It was no longer safe to assume anything. First, she had to find a way to hide in the shadows.

Then, she had to find a way to fight off the man who was hunting her. That he had attacked her seemed utterly nonsensical to her. Why hadn’t he offered to help stop the world’s end? They could have worked together, and bolstered each other’s efforts. They could have exchanged knowledge and skills.

Instead, he’d chosen war. Her fury at him was compounded by what could have been. It was bad enough the moon was going to fall, and he was making it worse.

Mirian did her best to bury her anger so that it wouldn’t impede her thinking.

She had time to prepare. At least a day or two, because whoever this new traveler was, he didn’t awaken in Torrviol. Then, she could lay low and try to figure out more about her opponent. Mirian vowed not to make contact with Nicolus, Xipuatl, or even Lily. She reformulated her ‘Vera’ disguise, since she’d been assassinated while under that illusion spell on Xipuatl’s doorstep. But she hadn’t died in Valen’s room, so as far as she could tell, this new nemesis of hers hadn’t figured out that Valen was a contact, or that she was staying with her.

Mirian went to take out a loan, then spent the next two days in a flurry of scribing spells and working on artifice. She also bought a quilted silk undershirt that was supposedly bullet resistant. She’d overheard soldiers singing them praise, though many of them also wore steel breastplates, so how effective it actually was she didn’t know. Hopefully, if her force shield could slow the velocity of a bullet, the silk could do the rest.

She worked with Valen to plan out casual routes they could both take to look for suspicious movements. This opponent was obviously comfortable with illusions and intelligence operations, but Mirian had at least a pretty good sense of the normal movements she could expect around town. The man was coming from somewhere and making contact with the Akanan spies—she just had to figure out the when and where.

She told Valen to go wander the Academy grounds. She took her position outside the spy’s headquarters, and waited.

And waited.

By the 4th of Solem, she thought she was seeing a change in the pattern of spy movement. By the 5th of Solem, the spy network had clearly been redirected to a new purpose. Valen saw spies shadowing Nicolus and Xipuatl between classes, while Mirian watched as the Torrviol Guard’s patrol routes changed. Frustratingly, the spies seemed to know their headquarters was being watched, so her stakeout of the place had turned up nothing. After the first few days, they apparently abandoned the building, but where they had relocated, she had no clue. Based on where some of the spies suddenly appeared, they were using the Underground for movement. Likely, they’d used tunneling spells to remove anything they needed in the headquarters and left a bunch of traps.

Either Mirian’s routine trips to the southeast side of town hadn’t been as subtle as she’d hoped, or they’d found some other way of discovering her. On the 10th of Solem, Mirian was sitting on a bench pretending to read a book when she found herself getting hit by a sudden dispel and her illusion shattered into shards of light.

She immediately pulled a wand from her belt and raised an enhanced force shield, but when she looked around, it wasn’t Akanan spies approaching her, but four of the Torrviol Guard. She recognized Roland and, of course, the false captain.

“Mirian Castrella? You need to come with us,” Nathanial said.

She thought about asking ‘why?’ and getting them to name whatever crime she’d supposedly committed, but decided there wasn’t a point. If they wanted to charge her with something, they’d just make it up. There would be no justice in Torrviol, just theater.

Perhaps there was still a chance for her to learn more about what the other time traveler was doing. Perhaps in private, when they thought they had the advantage, one of them would reveal something. The guards searched her for any sort of magical items and weapons. They missed the arcane catalyst on the inside of her belt, but seized her spellbook and wands.

The interrogation room was familiar. The woman sitting in the chair was a stranger.

Mirian had expected Nathanial to interrogate her while he kept pretending to be a captain, but instead, the woman sitting in the chair said, “Thank you. Leave us.”

Her red hair was done up in a tight bun and had a single bronze hairpin that resembled a wand in it. She was wearing the uniform of an Arcane Praetorian, including the signature twisted bronze torque with dragon heads on each end.

Mirian immediately knew who she was pretending to be, and who she was, though she still didn’t know her name. This was Specter. The Impostor. The woman who’d been hiding in the shadows for years.

On the table, she saw a familiar looking chest, wrapped in silver bands. The one that didn’t quite reflect light the way it ought to.

The woman stared at her, eyes cold and face stone. “Shall I skip the pleasantries? I’m given to understand you already understand why you’re really here.”

“Sure,” said Mirian. “What else did he tell you?”

“A great many things, but I’d like to hear them from you, without leading you in any way.”

Was this an opportunity to get her to see reason? She had to try. “Both of us are in a time loop. So he’s no doubt presented you with a bunch of foreknowledge, or perhaps personal things. Maybe he knows a secret of yours. Maybe he has leverage.”

The Impostor kept her face blank. “I don’t tell people my secrets. Only a fool does.”

That paranoid attitude fit with what Mirian knew, given how hard she’d been to find. “I won’t bore you then. So what do you want to know from me?”

“What’s your angle?”

She saw no reason to lie. “Protecting the Divine Monument. Right now, something is going on with the leylines. Soon, there will be eruptions across the world, both in Akana Praediar and Baracuel. There’s already been several that I’m sure you know about. There was a factory in Ferrabridge that got hit by one. I don’t know what the Monument under the Academy does yet, but I do know blowing it up only makes things worse. The time loop was initiated to stop it, that much I’m sure. What I don’t understand is why the other time traveler opposes me. If we worked together….”

The Impostor cocked her head sideways. “Convenient.”

Mirian could tell she was referring to the geopolitical interests Nicolus and his uncle had gone on about. Control of key resources. Competition. The great game of nations. To the Impostor, Mirian’s story was a nice excuse. “I assure you, it isn’t. It’s been a pain in the ass to protect it. If there was another way, I’d be doing it. So if you’re concerned about Baracuel’s power, there’s a diplomatic angle. Get Luspire a premiere appointment at Vadriach University and he’ll allow an Akanan research team to monitor the Monument. I can secure the Baracuel side of that agreement. What I need is someone to secure the Akanan side. For obvious reasons, they’re not listening to me.”

The other woman tapped her finger on the table a few times. “What makes you think I can secure the ‘Akanan’ side of things? Who exactly do you think I am?”

Mirian rolled her eyes. “Sorry, I thought we were past that. I didn’t realize you were still pretending to be Adria Gavell.” She leaned forward. “You shot Adria Gavell in the back of the head in the catacombs three years ago. You’re the Deeps turncoat, and I know you’re working for the Akanans, along with Nathanial, the cell leader. Call off the assassination of the Akanan Prime Minister. Call off the invasion. Put an end to this madness. It only ends in annihilation.”

Nothing she’d said so far had shaken the Impostor, but this did. She saw the flash of fear in her eyes and the brief recoil, though she recovered quickly.

“Interesting,” the Impostor said, voice controlled. “Your counterpart has a different explanation. God has deigned there to be a grand competition. Life is about clawing your way to the top. If you don’t bury your enemies, or worse, you think you can live in peace with them, they will bury you. There’s not an alternative, there’s only the fight for power.” She paused, then said, “I’m inclined to think he understands the human condition better than you.”

Mirian made a face. “That’s what he thinks? That this is some sort of elaborate—has he been paying attention to the dreams? You know he’s just trying to manipulate you into doing what he wants, right?”

“In this, he is honest. What are you doing, if not trying to manipulate me?”

“Is it manipulation if it’s the truth? I’m trying to save as many lives as I can here.”

The Impostor sighed. “Another common manipulation tactic. You should’ve gone into politics, I think you could convince a lot of ignorant plebs. You have that righteous outrage. They love that.” She stood up and knocked on the door twice.

At first, Mirian thought she was done. Weird interrogation, she thought. Then she saw the false captain walk through the door with two cages, one holding a moon flicker and the other holding a stonemole. Several glyphs helped reinforce the cage, and neither of the trapped myrvites were happy about their predicament. The stonemole kept trying to gnaw out of its cage, though the lightning ward on the bars shocked it back, while the moon flicker was attempting some sort of natural spell that the cage was suppressing, causing it to blur. It flapped its wings in frustration.

Mirian didn’t like the sight of the panicked animals. For a moment, she was confused. Then she remembered the box, and realized what they were for. Necromancy. She needs them for a necromantic spell.

She felt a strange mix of fear and curiosity, and she hesitated. She had her arcane catalyst hidden, but did she even want to use it? If she waited, she could get a first-hand demonstration of a new type of magic.

The problem was, she was clearly the target. She thought of the soul-marks the spies had. If the Impostor was going to mess with her soul….

Mirian watched as the other woman opened the box. The Impostor closed her eyes briefly, channeling, but without a divination device, she wouldn’t know the combination of arcane energy she was using. Mirian struck—using raw magic to create a force blade, she aimed it at the Impostor’s throat.

The force blade dissipated, hitting spell resistance more typical of a bog lion than a person. She saw the bronze torque she was wearing glow with ethereal light.

Shit, she thought, as the Impostor’s eyes went wide and she pulled out a wand. She hit Mirian with a wave of force, slamming her out of the chair and back into the wall. Her head hit the stone, and for a few seconds, she blacked out. When she came to, blinking away stars, she was on the floor. She felt blood dribbling down the back of her neck, and the Impostor had already found the arcane catalyst and was removing it. She muttered, “God, I ask for basic competence, and it is too much.” To Mirian she said, “Try that again and I’ll make your world pain. Hold still and this won’t hurt a bit.”

Mirian groaned, and the Impostor slammed her to the ground as she tried to rise. Then she felt force shackles wrap around her. Her head was still in agony, and the world wouldn’t stop spinning. Mirian fought back nausea and tried to focus on what the Impostor was doing. She struggled so that she was sitting up against the wall.

The Impostor had taken the wand and first skull out of the chest. Then, while the skull sat on the table, she closed her eyes. There was a horrid scream from the stonemole, and in that distant place where Mirian could feel her soul, she felt something intruding into it. It was unpleasant; like icy worms were moving beneath her skin. The stonemole began to wither in front of her eyes, its flesh rapidly blackening and desiccating.

Mirian closed her eyes. The light was too bright in the room. She tried to focus, but the pain and nausea were too much. Whatever the Impostor had just done, at least it hadn’t made her any worse. She opened them again and saw the other woman had her hand on the second cage, and had changed out the skulls. 

The moon flicker let out a blood-curdling screech that was somehow worse than the stonemole’s. This time, as the bird withered, it felt like claws were tearing at her soul.

She screamed.

Comments

I don't understand why she wouldn't kill herself to get away from the One Thing that can end her. Really, it's not that difficult to comprehend.

Deinos

I rushed through the chapters in a day and I agree with the other comments that this latest escalation in the story is just too much.

Andrei

I’m just not a fan of the new “race with an enemy looper” development. If Mirian finds a way to boot the other looper out (e.g., she finds a parasite on her soul that’s hijacking it, so she gets rid of it and is just more cautious about soul magic from now on) then that would be awesome, but otherwise, I’ll probably stop reading here. It’s just not a direction I enjoy, although ofc there are other people who do, so getting confirmation on this would be really helpful for me. Props for putting out your writing regardless, and thanks for the story.

Eyo

Thanks everyone for the thoughtful and detailed feedback. It's a lot to synthesize, but it's also given me a lot to think about in terms of how to better bring out the emotional beats I want to hit and fulfill the promises the story has made. I haven't done it before (mostly because opening up edits of previous chapters is a huge can of worms), but I'm considering editing chapter 81, which I think can help hit one of the major beats I think I fumbled. I also might make some minor changes to this chapter. Neither will be story-altering, but hopefully they'll be an upgrade in quality. Any edits will be in addition to the twice-weekly updates. I'll let people know if I make those. While I have an outline of the story I'm continuing to follow, the outline doesn't specific what events happen in what chapter, but I think (without spoiling anything) by around ch86 or 87 people will know whether the story is continuing in a direction that is right for them.

UraniumPhoenix

Yeah, I think after this chapter I agree with some of the other readers about a lack of a real break/victory for Mirian. I like the plot twist of another time traveler(s). But as a reader who becomes attached to main characters it's very emotionally painful to read about the war and dying for tons of chapters, then what I thought was a break was actually her being devastated her family is gone, and then what I thought was a war victory is now her best friends being tortured for information and Mirian getting soul raped and probably harmed beyond the scope of a single time loop. I've gone from refreshing Patreon several times per day to being a bit hesitant to even read the next chapter. I don't feel that any outside-story Author Notes can alleviate this problem at all. I didn't notice any out of character stuff.

Luna

The other thought is that the question of agency will probably be more important from here on. It’s OK to have a MC be manipulated or play a necessarily reactive role for a while. Having that go on for too long eventually leads to the sense that the story is, on some level, just about a puppet being puppeteered. Seemed like loop 1.0 could have ended in some more positive way with respect to agency. Instead, it sort of seems like loop 2.0 dragged the puppet to a new & much more dangerous stage, but with strings still firmly attached.

Ez Abc

I dunno. I feel like a breather or payoff or sense of resolution could help following the success with preventing the apocalypse. This escalation to ‘loop 2.0: now with moar loopers’ goes hard, and makes it feel like so much of loop 1.0 had no catharsis or reward for Mirian as a person. If anything, the rug got pulled out from under her in a pretty soul-crushing way. If the goal is ‘keep traumatizing the MC’, it’s working. But at some point, I feel like something to counterbalance that is needed to keep things from turning into a slog. (I get that she’s growing as a character archetype & that power go brrr is good. What I don’t get as much is that she’s being given any chance to grow as a person & process & find ways to cope with the hell she’s going through.)

Ez Abc

For me I am fine without hints/only minor hints when I know that the storyline is fixed and knowing what will happen won't change it. But for stories that are still being written, where feedback can still massively influence the storyline, I also like broader strokes so if there are some issues/improvements they can be addressed before the story reaches the point of it becoming fixed. But at the same time I also never had an author who did this, so I can't really be sure if the spoilers wouldn't ruin it

dabo1

If frustrated readers are a real problem, I think it should be dealt inside the story instead of author notes, so that all future readers on all platforms benefit. If it's not that big of a problem, I don't mind either way. Always love to read about the process behind the writing, though.

Olavi Kaukamieli

It's like darksouls. You've lost to the same boss a few hundreds times so far. But when you finally beat it, boy is it going to feel good.

mike

I do feel some explanation about certain decisions would help. Ideally they'd make their way back into the story as well in some form as well. I've said it in previous comments, but we (and mirian) are too in the dark on too many points of the story. That somewhat worked as long as long as she was on her own and getting through the battle was the only focus, but now that things have opened up we know too little and her actions (like in this chapter) make no sense and feel weird. With everything we/she knows about necromancy, her soul and the time loop, she should have used her shot to end the loop and get out there without soul damage/mark 100% of the time. There are no indications the time loop will help or that it might be an acceptable risk. It goes against everything the story has been building up without any good reason. This is just one example, but it's these kind of things that break stories and make me drop them. The same goes for her staying in the city under these conditions, she should have gotten out of there as soon as she learned the other time traveler was on too her. Maybe start her adventure/journey to Akana Praediar or Persama. An explanation why she didn't would be appreciated, but as you say would feel more like an excuse. What we really needed is a reason for here to stay around, like her leaving town for a couple of loops and booking no results, not being able to get to Akana Praediar, or get tracked down anyway and killed. It wouldn't change the weirdness of what's happening, but it would at least give us an idea of her reason to stay. The same applies to the soul mark, I can understand the story needing it to advance, as can I understand her running out of options and eventually getting captured. But then why offer her the option? Have them find the hidden catalyst, god knows they should have found and reported it after all the times they killed her.

Enthernal

It feels like her one advantage (the time loop) and one hope to overcome the mountain of problems was just snatched away

Rex Martin

You have done an excellent job of having characters make realistic decisions that make sense for their established characteristics so far in my opinion at least. Even when they make sub-optimal choices it doesn’t feel out of character or to force the plot along.

Rex Martin

I would quite like a vague idea of where the story is going especially on patreon, if it looks like and arc or two that I'm not going to enjoy id rather take a break until i can read through it all in one go than drag it on for weeks or months not enjoying the story while paying for it. Ive done that one too many times and it kills all enjoyment from novels i otherwise really liked, and i have really enjoyed reading this so far

Rex Martin

I think the biggest issue people have with this is that Mirian feels a hint out of character. She isn't the smartest or the dullest, but it's been shown that no matter how many loops go by, she doesn't want to see her friends suffer. So it just feels strange that she'd be so willing to chat or cooperate with someone dead set on killing her and anyone she's close to. She's spent years planning a way to achieve her goal only to have some random guy kill her and someone she trusts. I can maybe see her being willing to talk if it was only once or twice that she was killed, but her foe has killed her and hurt her friends several times before she had a chance to meet them. She knows necromancy exists and practices a form of soul magic. It's not the fact that she got caught that people have an issue with. It's that her approach doesn't even seem like something she would do. Why isn't Mirian pissed, angry, or scared that someone hurt her friends? She feels righteous anger towards people who slaughtered innocents while under orders but doesn't want to kill the man who's put her friends in danger and taken their lives. The one who's worn their bodies like meat puppets and killed them just to send a message. The guy who stole victory from her hands when she just got to feel relief. What's stopping her from doing everything in her power to either kill first and ask questions later or ensure her friend's safety before she dares to make a move? Her enemy has clearly shown an unwillingness to converse or seek reason and she has more than enough reason to either kill him or put him in a position where he can't kill her. She can still get caught and branded, but the better question is simple. Why did he even wait this long? He's killed her while she was vulnerable several times and even led her into traps. Why wait until now to brand her when he could've done so any of the other times? I understand that it's for drama but why drag it out and make Mirian act out of character for it? You could've accomplished the same thing by having Mirian chase him into a trap, have him kidnap her in her sleep, or just have him disguise himself as someone close to her and then trap her. Instead, Mirian walks right into the palm of her foe's hand when she has no reason to think that she'll be fine and is currently trying to hide from them out of a mix of frustration, fear, and paranoia. If you wanted to drag it out, you could've made the branding a long spell that can only be accomplished under certain specific conditions. It would still allow us to see his point of view and make him look competent without making Mirian feel out of character and stupid. This could've been a game of cat and mouse where Mirian and her foe constantly try to outwit each other only for her to lose to someone with far more experience. It's your story and I respect that. I'm only really posting this comment to give a voice to what others might be thinking but haven't said and to let you know what they might be thinking. My apologies if this comment isn't the most easily readable or concise. Thank you to anyone who read this far and have a nice day.

Theboy Inblue

I guess thats true, but that comes with the problem of leaving all her resources behind. she needs get stronger to deal with a-lot of her problems, but the pace that she was progressing has been quite slow which was fine up until now because she had time, now she doesn’t and if she has to run her pace of progression should realistically slow even further without tutoring from professors and an archmage.

Rex Martin

I don't think people are really upset that there are other time travelers. I feel it's more that the story has gone too long with no release of tension, no victory, no humor. It feels like the story has become centered around Mirian being endlessly tortured. And not just this chapter, of course. There's this sense of hopelessness pervading the last dozen chapters. -Fight a war, lose over and over and over. -After an epic trip back to visit home to find a hint of peace, nope, they're just gone. For reasons. Screw Mirian once again. -Return to hopeless war, create miracle victory, only to find it was all pointless due to some unnamed rando showing up out of nowhere. -Said rando is designated super OP, so she cant have the slighted win against them. All together it's just a bit much.

11037

it seems simple to me, she just has to leave torrviol

George

personally I really like stories to speak for themselves, but people do have harsh opinions on certain topics in progression fantasy so it can be tough

George

I think that's the point of the story. It is supposed to be about someone less pragmatic and more relatable than Zorian.

Akka

Another thing I could post more about is the why's of past chapters. For example, where the inspiration for a character or decision came from, or why Mirian makes certain decisions (like why she frequently makes sub-optimal choices). There's certainly a reason behind ever choice, but I also don't want it to be felt like I'm making excuses; every story has flaws, and this one's no exception. And every reader comes at it with different experiences and expectations, so I also don't want my comments to make people's reactions to a moment or scene feel invalid.

UraniumPhoenix

I always read the various comments on each chapter to get a sense of how its landing, which can sometimes help me make future adjustments (or to know I'm on the right track). I've noticed a lot of the comments are predictions, or hopes that the story does or doesn't go in a certain direction. I'm curious: would people rather get vague hints as to where the story goes next so they have a better sense of if its fulfilling the direction they'd like to see it go, or would they rather just let the story speak for itself? For example, I could comment on my philosophy on progression fantasy and setbacks, but even keeping the comments about story structure would hint at where the story goes next. Curious to hear people's thoughts.

UraniumPhoenix

Im a bit worried that the only way out of this for her is for the author to make her enemy/s do something stupid because as of right now she seems to be in an impossible to win scenario

Rex Martin

Not bothered by the cliff, am a *little* bothered by the idiocy to not suicide but it didn’t feel out of character. Mostly bothered by the 2bit villain motivations tbh and hoping there’s more depth there.

sparkc

agreed. I hate this kind of cliff unless it is resolved quickly.

Morog T Tiny

Yeah, when the myrvites were brought into the room my first thought was Mirian should commit suicide to prevent any tampering with her soul. (Possible Spoiler) The main character from Re:monarch, a story that also has a time loop concept, does this. (Spoiler end) (Tho, I recognise it's not a common idea to have, especially for Mirian and don't mind that she didn't) Also, this chapter confirmed something that has been bothering me for a while. Mirian is strangely naive, gullible and uninformed for someone of all of 23/24 years. It's always been weird to me how little she knows about the world, about magic (considering she's in 6th yr. I always felt her knowledge base felt more appropriate for 1-3rd yr. If everyone is going to graduate this ill equipped from torvoil then there is a serious flaw in the education system) and about how society is structured in general. It reads very much like a rural person encountering city life for the first time. which would be fine if she hadn't been at the academy for 6yrs already. I get that the author wants to introduce us to magic organically through the story by letting us learn with Mirian but it's a disproportionate knowledge gap considering her apparently education level and she just should've started off a little younger and in like her 2nd yr ( that would address a lot of the problems). Sometimes Mirian makes these unfounded leaps in logic or fails to do so for simple problems. It's not major most of the time and I doubt most people notice but for example, her discovering the spies and immediately jumping to illegal conspiracy instead of something discrete and sanctioned that she just wasn't in the know for. That one really got me. Or how she jumped into danger completely unprepared despite it completely going against her characterization. And a broader issue with the story is how nobody else seems to notice these apparently very obvious spies or even mention them (I know it was stated some professors were in the know but I'm refering to students). Or how she's strangley desired by both Valen and Nicola despite her and the latter never speaking in the entirety of the 6yrs of knowing each other. Even now how despite her and her friends being murdered several times by the opposition, her first thought was to work together. Not that I think they shouldn't, but she should be frustrated, afraid and angry and slowly work towards the idea with plenty of resistance instead of it being option number one. It would make her a more complex character if she had these internal monologue/ conflicts for many parts throughout the story. But maybe I'm being nitpicky, I still enjoy the story even tho some aspects can be frustrating.

Emma Mass

this is why that mother of learning guy had all those self kill devices

Findell

I feel like this turning point is gonna make or break the story

Nina

oof, bit of a cliff there

George

Meh to the boring part

trufflezz

Setbacks, in my time loop? Yeah this is gonna hurt. Smart play to get the necromancer to do something to her though. I wonder if that dark spot on her soul is going to come into play somehow.

DrSubterfuge

I dislike the direction this is going

WindGunner

Oh boyyyy

Allora Lee


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