Honkai: Star Rail – Banner Character, Delivering Knives to the Player [34]

Lingzhou’s smile was as warm as sunshine.

"These two delicate, pretty girls aren't suited for boxing in the ring."

"So, my dear brother, you get what I'm saying, right?"

Under Lingzhou’s amiable yet intimidating gaze, Sampo felt an inexplicable chill pierce straight into his skull.

He shuddered involuntarily, forcing a smile uglier than crying.

"I—I—I get it…"

"Leave the fighting to good old Sampo here, code name: Handsome Blue-Haired Guy…"

Lingzhou smiled until his eyes curved like crescent moons, patting Sampo on the shoulder and giving him a thumbs-up.

"You're such a good brother."

"Hahahahaha—!"

"Husband’s so handsome, Ah Xian loves you dearly!!!"

"This cunning personality of his dances wildly on my preferences, stomping and grinding them into dust!"

"Sampo’s expression is killing me. It really takes one cunning fox to subdue another."

"For some reason, he seems super terrified of Lingzhou, hahaha!"

"Oh no, I laughed so hard my boobs hurt. I need a container to hold them in place!"

[???]
[You’re at it again?]
[Mods! Mods! Someone’s breaking the speed limit here!]
[Holy crab, she actually went straight for it!]
[No wonder today's stream has me vomiting rainbows—I can't take it…]
[Something feels wrong up there, but also kind of right?]
[Look at you pathetic lot. Not like me, pondering the meaning of the universe.]
[Viewers are starving, coming to this streamer for crumbs.]
[Can't help it. Ah Xian’s just like Lingzhou in-game—]
[No matter where they go, they're like fireflies in the darkness:]
[Brilliant, outstanding, utterly exceptional.]
[I approve this statement—Lingzhou is indeed exceptional and reliable.]

Soon, Ah Xian returned to the camera’s view, just catching sight of a highlighted paid comment:

[I’m sorry—I couldn't resist sinning against Lingzhou. Now I feel guilty…]

Ah Xian blinked, instantly understanding the hidden meaning. A quick check confirmed the commenter was female.

"No worries, no need to apologize. Everyone makes mistakes."

"The mistake you've made is one we’ve all made—I might even commit it myself tonight. It's human nature, totally understandable."

"You don't need to repent; Lingzhou’s charm is just too irresistible…"

Unexpectedly, Ah Xian’s casual reassurance became instant gospel in the chatroom.

[Great! Now we don’t have to apologize to Ah Xian anymore either!]
[Sobbing…I always felt guilty for sinning against Ah Xian, but hearing her say this is truly healing.]
[Ah Xian is so noble, I’m crying rivers.]
[No, Lingzhou’s the noble one. Without him, we wouldn't have Ah Xian’s comforting scriptures.]
[Repeat after me: Lingzhou is great, no more words needed.]
[Lingzhou is great, no more words needed.]
[…]

Ah Xian saw clearly how the chatroom’s atmosphere had shifted, though it didn't bother her one bit.

As someone who made doujinshi—sometimes even using herself as a reference—what hadn’t she seen by now?

Beauty existed to be admired.

If she could help this many people, then that was simply her talent.

Just like now, Lingzhou could make so many people happy—both in-game and in real life.

That, too, was his charm, his talent.

Human nature was understandable, after all.

Returning to the game, Ah Xian maneuvered her character into the fight club.

The plot wasted no time.

Immediately upon entering, they saw Sampo standing in the ring, his legs trembling uncontrollably.

Sampo: "Brother, can I step down real quick to buy some insurance…?"

Lingzhou beamed cheerfully. "Don't worry, we’re brothers. I'll definitely help if you're in trouble. Go ahead and fight your heart out."

Sampo: "..."

What did I ever do to deserve this?

It wasn't that he didn’t want to flee, but facing Lingzhou was like encountering a natural predator.

He was a rabbit, Lingzhou a fierce tiger.

Even though he hadn't donned his mask, Sampo was still—

Never mind, no point thinking about it.

A fool’s instincts were never wrong.

Better get this humiliation over with quickly.

As the battle began, Ah Xian burst out laughing when she realized Sampo was the only party member available.

She hadn’t expected Sampo himself to fight after the screen shattered into combat.

She’d assumed the fight would use her existing party.

Who knew Lingzhou genuinely meant for Sampo to solo the arena?

Unless enemy damage was deliberately lowered, wouldn’t Sampo get beaten half to death?

Just as this thought crossed her mind, a fist-shaped Automaton Spider charged in, knocking out over a third of Sampo’s HP.

Even worse, the left-hand action bar showed all three Automatons would attack consecutively.

Sampo: "Aaaahhh! Brother, help me quick! One more hit and I’m dead meat!"

March 7th: "They haven’t even touched you yet! Quit running around and fight back already!"

Stelle: "Good luck, Sampo. We're cheering for you."

The second Automaton charged forward.

Sampo: "Aaahhh, mommy, I wanna go home!"

Then the third Automaton attacked, leaving Sampo’s health bar at a tiny sliver: exactly 1 HP.

Lingzhou: "Hang in there, brother! I'm coming to help!"

With that, Lingzhou entered the battle under a scripted tag.

Stelle: "Count me in."

March 7th: "Be grateful—this is support from a beautiful girl!"

Three scripted characters and one trial character formed a bizarre lineup.

The difference was obvious.

Scripted characters couldn't be manually controlled; their ultimates were locked, automatically triggered.

Ah Xian freely controlled Sampo, finishing the fight with help from the Astral Express trio.

Outside, commentator Dr. Dig loudly proclaimed:

"What a brilliant victory! The winner is Handsome Blue-Haired Guy lying facedown on the floor, along with three spectators who jumped in!"

Hearing this, March 7th’s expression immediately soured.

"Spectators? Couldn’t you give the three of us nicknames too?"

Stelle: "Hello, Pink-Haired Doofus."

March nearly choked. "Forget it. Your taste is awful anyway. Then what about Lingzhou?"

① "The White-Haired Young Master."
② "The Charming Sky-Winged Gentleman."
③ "The Reliable Good Doctor."

"Obviously he's my charming gentleman~! Darling~ Your beloved greets you here~ Let’s share our bridal chamber tonight, ehehehehehe…"

Ah Xian acted as if she'd downed ten bottles of liquor, dizzy with delight:

"I've tasted oranges, apples, bananas, peaches—all sorts of fruits—but there's just one fruit I rarely get…"

[Warning! Warning! Speed now reaching Mach 1!]
[The plane's control stick just snapped off.]
[Is this the life of a doujinshi creator? Every flirtation’s unique.]

March 7th: "You’re clearly biased! Did you miss my mighty hammer?"

Stelle: "Hammer is fine, just no elbows, please."

Sampo: "…Could we spare a little care for the injured? At least help me up first. It's embarrassing lying facedown on the floor…"

Lingzhou: "Sure thing."

Lingzhou casually scooped up Sampo, carrying him outside.

Sampo screamed in pain.

"Aaaargh—my poor waist!"

---

This is a fan translation of 崩铁：卡池角色，给玩家发刀 by 三十度幻. All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!