People show you what they’re made of when the world is falling apart.
My husband has been warm and positive, Max has been going into caregiving overdrive, the coven has rallied. Last night at 9pm our group chat lit up with photos of each of our candles and altars. I can’t tell you what it meant to know we were all together in that moment. My phone stays busy with family checking in and old friends coming out of the wood work.
My ex is isolated and alone, it doesn’t bring out the best in him. I tried to be positive, I tried to be compassionate, I know he’s lonely in ways I am not. In spite of everything happening he picked a fight with me, had a temper tantrum where he blasted me about my choices and then ended communication with me angrily, during a pandemic, by saying “Good luck.”
And I thanked the universe for reminding me, in spite of my impulse for kindness, that people show their true colours when their back is up against the wall. And he always has. Fuck him. I don’t need that kind of volatile stress when everything else is tenuous. I never did. I’m looking at my team knowing I’m going to be taken care of when push comes to shove. That feels good.