Rootin' Tootin' Edition

Day 29 of Yummy Turtle watch. I have a contract that requires me to keep filming or through some legal mumbo jumbo and I quote "If you fail to do your duties you will forfeit all freedom and become a salve for the mines." The last in news is that the munchkins have been trying to get more tapes. No one in the village seems to understand this other than my camera man. Who after my storming off like a ... Do i have to read that? *from off screen* Read or to the mines. Who after my storming off like a little girl in a pink tutu. Went to go get the mic that i threw like a *sighs* like a girl. Could you guys not come up with a better one? *from of screen* M-I-N-E-S. Ran into some munchkins with our camera. They took out the tape and gestured to an unused one handed the used one to the camera man. An regarding tapes of questionable content. We received permission to air the tape. But it has gone missing. I want to say Bogwort stole it, but I have a feeling the crew may have sold it on the market for a quick buck. Now for Dirk's Favorite Shepherd Pie. We know this just going to be a but of innuendos so do I have to ... Wait is that a real recipe. That's not what i was expecting. Take a lot of potatoes and boil them until soft once soft mash the potatoes. If you want to add anything to the potatoes now that time stuff like sour cream, salt, pepper, milk, and whatever you want. Cook some meat preferably ground beef or bison season with whatever you want. place meat in the pan followed layer of cooked carrots and peas. Place the mashed potatoes over bake until the top of the potatoes start to change to a very light brown place. Add a layer of cheese to the top Preferably cheddar and the sharper the better. Once done take out a let cool. Eat with guest. If it a date say you made it for them special. Dirk note the chance of getting some improves. (Warning ensure meat is cooked raw meat or microwave pizza can give you food poisoning. Ensure meat is cooked and microwave pizza not given game designers/creators.)

Nine Horse Hitch

I do enjoy watching this turtle move along the path.

Badger66

Day 28 of Yummy Turtle watch. Nothing out of the ordinary has happened today. The turtle has been farting by nothing out of the ordinary. I mean for a normal village. Even Bogwort seems normal. It almost like the world is coming to an end. The worst part is no one cares. But now to show the video of what the scholars are doing with the women to fend off the slimes. *screen changes to shot of a laundry place near the river* "So how tight do you want to be latch to the post this time?" the scholar ask a woman off camera. "Tighter this time. I could have sworn i could have gotten out of them last time." say the women as she comes in to shot with no clothes on. She walk over to a post in the shape of and "X" and has her arms latched to the top of the post. She then has her leg latched to the bottom. The scholar walk away off camera. After a while a few slime come out of the water with a strange almost male like growth on them. The approach the women and start to climb up her legs. HEr breath is now audible to the mic. She starts to moan. *screen goes back to the normal broadcast* Well now what was that. I'm sorry we can't air that this is a "family channel." *from some off shot* You read sexual innuendos in fake recipes. You looked up a woman's skirt. This may be the wrong time to release that. Okay we will broadcast the footage unedited and uninterrupted tomorrow. *same guy off camera* I don't think we are allow to do that. Then what can i do. *same guy off camera* Stop sucking at your and give us the news. You want the news. You want the news. Okay here the fucking news. Nothing happened today. People are going about their business as usual. *anncorcer stomps away throwing the mike in to the woods*

Nine Horse Hitch

Day *Whispers* what day is it?, 27 of Yummy turtle watch. Dirk's favorite Loaded potatoes First and always ensure the potatoes are t in your mouth because you intend to do such. Second choose two medium potatoes but are able to use two large potatoes or small potatoes. Prepare the potatoes and again ensure firmness. Once the potatoes are ready be sure the are capable of holding the load you intend to put on them. The potatoes may require some cupping. If not it still better to cup them. Once you start to put your load on the potatoes continue until satisfied. These are better for group enjoyment so have another guest try them out before trying it yourself. Dirk notes it's about them not you. The salve was seen slapping Bogwort today as he was claiming to be possessed By the turtle farts, which the turtle is still doing. People say the farting sounds like boos while others say they are cries from what they have seen. It has been noted that the female villagers seem more weary of the male villagers often keeping a constant eye on them. The hunt for the video tape from the munchkin camera proved fruitless. The munchkins have been seen around town but not cause mischief but rather looking for something. The munchkins haven't been mocking use with the camera and mic they stole. The scholar has been run out of town after trying to be "possessed" and trying to be with the Inn owner's daughter. No one blames him due to the "uniform" she wears but his action are now considered unactable. Bogwort is still in the village. Town we will bring unseen footage of what the scholars are having the women do to fend off the slimes.

Nine Horse Hitch

man, things move faster when you stop paying attention to them :D

Furanky

Day 26 of Yummy Turtle watch. A new rumor has started to spread as it was recently overheard that Yummy Tiger referred to himself as a "turtle" that he himself is the Yummy Turtle. Despite being seen with turtle. Another theory the turtle and Yummy Tiger are of the same being but separated due to some unknown reason. There has been an explosion in the village. The cause is unknown but it happened at the old magic shop. Bogwort has been seen scorched and is a person of interest. All the villagers are saying he did it. The scholar who claim to be possessed was caught again this time in the forest. When asked why he the only one affected by the fart ghost he claims his near death experience has "weakened (his) constitution making (his) corporeal manifestation capable of becoming a vessel for the spirit of the bowel movement." At which point Bogwort throw an old tomato at him and hit him in the head. All the villagers laugh. Some villagers even screamed "Nerd!" To top today off Triste has returned with plenty of Munchkin heads. She noted the smell of the village. The turtle is still farting. Her outfit and hair seemed rather rough up. She has not return with any camera or video tapes. All the male hunter have become more motivated after a joke of Triste appearance and half the village seem to be hunting the munchkins. Tomorrow we will bring you Dirk's Favorite Loaded Potatoes. He say he enjoys these so much he like having one in each hand.

Nine Horse Hitch

Day 25 of Yummy Turtle watch. After the celebration everything has died down. Everyone was out cold. Apparently the Man in Black was able to put a label on Bogwort. It reads "horny goblin." Can't think of a more accurate tag. The villagers are stating to think that the turtles fart are posing them. The reason for it was a slave was found with the scholar with the fiancee. The fiancee moved from the village to go to her new village, where the scholar plans to move to perform more research, two days ago. The villagers listen to scholar saying how he was possessed to do wrong. Bogwort has been seen missing his favorite aspects of the scholars fiancee. Due to the alarmingly high amount of Dirk's favorite potato recipes we will be releasing one every other day. Today's recipe is mashed potatoes. Step one washes the potatoes ensure that they are clean enough to put in your mouth. Once cooked ensure that the potatoes are firm and mash them with long hard tool until satisfied and add all the cream you want. He says it is good to get too large potatoes but four is better.

Nine Horse Hitch

In answer to a post (in Halloween Edition) is the chapter one is not a patron update.

Nine Horse Hitch

Sir. I've been reading your patreon, but I haven't found the answer(maybe because I'm a tiny little bit stupid.) So i'll ask you directly. It says you will release the games for free, but is it when it is finished, or per chapter? like right now prologue is open for free, but chapter 1 is for patreon, then next will be chapter 1 free and chapter 2 patreon?

"Rootin' Tootin'" should have given you a hint :-)

YummyTiger Gaming

That is.... AWESOME. Man, I totally want to make a video now with the turtle sllllloooooowwwwwllllyyyy moving across the board and this song playing in the background. It may be happening, would be perfect to do near the very end!

YummyTiger Gaming

Thanks!

YummyTiger Gaming

The question is, if you eat a ghost and fart, does it make a "booooo..."

YummyTiger Gaming

Haha.

YummyTiger Gaming

If it is quite hard to find, it is probably a secret. You'll know most of the time. In terms of scenes, if you find a scene with a 5 diamond rating, that is a hard one to find. I don't plan on much 4th wall business, as I'm not a fan of it.

YummyTiger Gaming

probably the turtle will go buck naked

Now that I think about it... How on earth are you going to fit the turtle on Day 5? Are you going to cut him in two and then sew him back on Day 6 like some mad doctor?

Aestral

How will we know if we found an easter egg?

James

Thank you turtle but the promised land is on another island o_o

Day 24 of Yummy Turtle watch. The turtle has moved again or reappeared or ate the ghost which would explain the why the turtle is farting so much. Due to the news and celebration Dirks favorite potato recipes will be brought to you tomorrow. The Man in Black showed up and scolded Yummy Tiger. We could hear much from where we were ease-dropping but Yummy Tiger referred to him as Mr. Black. Word is he may be working with other people like Mr. White. He has rejuvenated is efforts to tag every thing. There even a tag on the back of my head. *Turn around tag reads "annoying announcer."* It says "Dude." As the villagers are celebrate there have been rumors a green monster roaming the area. Bogwort seems to be on edge. The last time he was like this was in the early days of the reporting. All the monster seem to be controlled for now. The gas that being emitted from the rear end of the turtle might be the cause. Get me a gas mask please.

Nine Horse Hitch

Like they say: "Once you go Black... You'll never go back!" Hehehhee! Congratulations on your project and I'm positive that the game will be great!!!

Yummy's new theme song... <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLE_emfAd74" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLE_emfAd74</a>

Darthjake

I can't decide if that Turtle is farting or merely kicking up dust from rounding a corner or picking up supposed speed. either way nice little touch, Also, You Can Do It. (Insert Little Engine that Could Here)

lorddarkfor