Hacker.wav (Final Message To Mother June From Bruce The Bouncer During The pride Parade)

Dear June,

I didn't like this. at all. I trusted you with my life and as always I learn something I've learned a month before. Don't trust anyone. I'm not another prick at your door.

I wish my ex boyfriend fought to keep me in his home. but he didn't. people shit talk because deep down we are all sacks of meat that need insurance. the farther back I look the more I realize, the only enemy I have is myself when I'm happy. I should never be happy. when I am someone gets hurt. someone gets yelled at. someone will get slapped. 

I learned during the parade that I am colourblind. I always thought I was just spookeedoo number two but I should of listened to the day time math on the first session of class because, the only enemy was that salty pound cake with a million friends.

I was just a boy with an ach for fame. I shot myself in the stomach to say "hey, could I be your friend?" 

Because I never wanted to be you. I wanted you to say that I was okay.

That the enemy isn't me it was the sun. 

Josh was the best husband I could of had. because he saw through all that shit and said, 

"Hi baxter, how are you?" simplicity scared me back then. the sham was jojo fucking behind my back and not in my ass.

and I leaned back and noticed the light in your closet. the only place where I felt before we moved.

Josh... is the IRS on your ass? 

Did i tweet out or say way too much?

you are the best bear I could of ever had.

but now. there's nothing i can say to win.

I know what I did was wrong but you didn't have to...
shelter me from the bleaching sun...
did you forget I'm aztec and aryan. 

I want to know how do I win...
to the first night you hugged me on that day.

my mother was scared and crying to your face...

(interlude)

it was years ago. but now.
i found jack by the creek. sheltered by the tree I was frozen by my gaze...
i wanted to be his legosi that day. but I'm not 6'4 with scrapping boots. aye.

I pulled him in my arms... I told him I am the same... the megaplex was just an hour away.

I laughed when he sneezed cause he's my puppy at night... he's gold to the touch...
his fur is rich when I realize that he's covered in my cum, and I'm naked in front of your cops.
why'd you leave I asked? I read below that the language I'm saying is against the community guidelines. will I lose my patreon now?
all my clients are gone... the haggle me for the refund. this isn't a poem. this isn't a song. this is a statement of me crying out for help but I think the Verran's know the leaders at patreon and are telling them I'm the one that changed their song when I...
didn't have any drugs on me. except what America gave me. I won't say that doctor's name cause he helped more then justin when I threw up from 8 smirnoffs and 30 puffs of all. It'd only been 3 days since I last threw up.
and I bulimic? no. that's my brother's nightmare cause he loved my sister more then I did at the time. what am i smoking anyway? I won't give you a taste.
it's Novacane.
my only drug is named frank ocean, Kevin parker, and Richard D. James on the synth since he was in third grade. Damn pat.. you still listening? you only check on me when you're drunk or high or when youre angry at me. I know what that song is about.. because I was there when you wrote it. and I think swan song is this one... would you like to hear it?

cause inside.. in the plastic Sinatra...

and now...
the end is near... 

and so i face... the final curtain. my friends.
I'll say it clear. of which I'm curtain. I'll state my case of which I'm certain.
I've lived a life that's full, I traveled each and every highway and more..

and more.. much more then this.. I did it my way.
regrets? I've had a few...
but then again.. two few to mention...
I did what I had to do. and saw you through
without exeption, I planned every charted course. each step along the biway.

and more.. frank.... I did it my way...
yes there were times... I'm sure you knew when i bit off more then can chew. but through all of it when i fucked it up. i ate it up and spit it out. i faced it all. and i'll stand tall. cause I'm doing it my way.
I've loved... I've laughed and cried... I've had my fill, my share of losing.
and now.. tears dry up, i find it all so amusing... you think i did all that?

and can say not in a shy way. I never traced... the fact that you think i did shows I am the better one. for what is a man. what i got? if not myself. and all the shit you have talked i wont go away, even when i have no money cause i need to die when i've said my feel

I'll shut the fuck up when you follow me back and apologize to me not in lies or dying in the streets of LA.
yeah you.. the one reading this, I love you cause you trust me when i say
I'll go on... my way...

,