Done Adulting Vol. 1 Ch. 20

The next few days passed more or less like the last. He spent more time outside, and to his chagrin much of it was clad only in his diaper, but no one saw him through the fence. He took naps in the sun and began to acquire a bit of color, leaving tan lines around his diaper that Amanda found too cute. She took surreptitious pictures of him reclining in the sand box and walking across the grass, or tried to, and though Jamie didn’t like being recorded that way, it made him feel special that someone cared enough to want to capture those moments. That the someone was Amanda made him feel even more special.

The day of the party arrived, and for the first time Jamie found himself in the playpen while Becky and Amanda cleaned and got ready for guests. He didn’t especially like the confinement, but on the other hand, this was his space. The suspended surface was soft, he had his bear, and Amanda gave him a coloring book and pencils to keep him occupied. He hadn’t opened the coloring books since the store.

Here were images, surely simple by big standards, unlike any style back home. They were too intricate and complex to have been made for big children. Even with the fine-tipped pencils Amanda had picked out, Jamie had to concentrate to follow the edges and stay in the lines. After two hours, he was only half done with the first page. He was absorbed.

“O, they’re going to be here in twenty minutes,” Becky fretted.

“It’ll be fine. It’s just family and Jane,” Amanda reassured her.

“You know how your grandmother can be.”

“Finish in here, and I’ll get Jamie ready.”

Amanda went into the living room and stood over the playpen. Jamie didn’t notice her. “Hey, buddy.”

Geez, seriously, how are they so quiet, he wondered when he looked up. “Let’s go get you ready for your guests,” she said.

He looked at the page. “Five more minutes?”

“Sorry, but it will be waiting for you later.” He closed the book, and Amanda lifted him from the playpen. Jamie was nervous. His first encounter with bigs who weren’t Amanda and Becky hadn’t gone well. Now he was meeting several at once. She set him on his feet, and he walked ahead of her to his room.

She went to his closet. “Okay, which do you want to wear?” She turned around holding up two hangers, one with overalls and one with a sleeper outfit. Becky wanted him in the overalls for company, but Amanda offered him the choice knowing it would make him feel better and that we wouldn’t choose the sleeper for strangers. A win-win.

“Those, I guess.”

She picked him up under his arms and hoisted him to the changing table. He knew the drill and lifted his arms. His shirt came off, he laid back, and his pants were pulled off.

“Here, sit up for a moment.” She held out her hands and helped him up, then moved him on her hip to the rocking chair. He wondered what was going on.

“So … how ya feeling today?” She leaned one elbow on the arm of the chair, resting her head on her fist, and kept the other around Jamie’s waist.

“Nervous.”

“I’m sure you are. What can I do to make you feel better?”

Jamie had questions he’d held off on asking, afraid the answers would only make him more anxious as he waited. “Who’s coming and what are they like?”

“You’ve been saving that, haven’t you? Uncle Daniel and Aunt Lauren. You’ll like them. Uncle Daniel is Mom’s brother and is a lot of fun; he’s younger by a few years. Aunt Lauren is nice; Mom always says she was fortunate in having a sister-in-law she actually likes.

Jane is Mom’s best friend. They’ve known each other since they were teenagers. If you get her alone she’ll tell you all the stories Mom doesn’t want us to know about her wilder days.

And Grandma is coming. She can be a bit …” Amanda’s eyes turned up as she looked for the right word. “Difficult. Just be yourself around her. Our neighbors were going to come, but I think something came up. Does that help?”

He thought about it. It helped a little; it wasn’t a lot of information. “Some. Um, how do they feel about, uh, people like me?”

“Love ‘em. Seriously. Even Grandma, though she’s a little less up to speed in some ways. But then I guess that’s a generational thing.”

Jamie felt the need to pee and did; it was getting easier. Amanda felt it but didn’t say anything. Jamie had a serious look on his face.

“What if I don’t like them?”

“Then you come find me or Mom if we’re not right there, or ask for us.”

“And if you are there? Can we have a signal?”

“Sure, but I don’t think we’ll need one.”

“Because I’ll like them all?”

“That, and because I’ll just know. But how about you pull on your earlobe just to be safe? That can be our signal.”

“Okay.”

“Let’s practice it.” Amanda tugged on her ear. Jamie did the same.

“Good, but let’s try the other just to be extra safe.” They both pulled on their other ear.

“And let’s do both at the same time just in case.” Jamie thought that was silly but did it anyway, trying to play along with the game she so earnestly was playing. He fell right into her trap.

When both arms were up, Amanda went for his armpits, tickling him all the way down to his ribs, and he nearly fell out of the chair trying to get away, laughing with tears in his eyes and out of breath.

“Stop doing that,” he protested, still laughing.

“Never.” She shook her head with solemn authority.

“Why not?”

“Because I took on certain responsibilities when I became your big sister, and that’s Number Seven. It’s out of my hands.” She kept a straight but lighthearted face. Good, Jamie thought.

“And speaking of responsibilities, let’s get you changed and dressed.”

Jamie tried to be reassured and hoped he could will it, but as he lay there he felt as though a clock were ticking, and the butterflies in his stomach wouldn’t settle down. He wasn’t looking at Amanda but toward the wall across the room, his eyes unfocused as if he were looking into the middle distance, not so much thinking as just experiencing his emotions. Amanda got him into a fresh diaper.

“How about some socks?” He didn’t hear her. She put ankle socks on his feet. He paid attention again when she lifted him off the table and set him on his feet him next to the dresser. Amanda opened the second drawer down and pulled out a onesie. Jamie hadn’t worn one yet and didn’t relish the idea, but he’d be wearing overalls, so he knew it would look like a t-shirt to anyone else. He couldn’t see what all she had to pick from: ones with cute phrases, ones with outlines of animals, ones with designs. She chose a grey one with thin, blue stripes. He lifted his arms, and once it was on him she knelt to snap it closed. He was in overalls a few seconds later, the same ones he had worn to the store, with the snaps on the legs and the elastic waistband that made them less baggy but accentuated what was underneath.

Amanda knelt down again to straighten his hair. He looked zoned out, with his left cheek pulled back in a face she recognized as the one he used when he was thinking. The butterflies in his stomach were getting agitated; he’d always had a nervous stomach, his body’s unpleasant physical response to stress.

The doorbell rang, and he jumped a little.

“Hey.” She took his chin and gently turned his face so they were looking into each other’s eyes. “These people are going to love you, and Mom and I will be here the whole time. If you get scared, remember …” she tugged on her ear lobe. “Okay?” He was not glad she had thought to come up with a secret signal.

She leaned into his crib and found his pacifier. “And here. If you don’t want to answer any questions, just put this in your mouth.” She tucked it into his pocket. “Are you ready?”

Trying to be brave, he put on a smile. “Do you want me to carry you?” God, yes, Jamie thought, someone to cling to.

“No, I’ll walk.” She smiled back and held out her hand, which he took, and they walked together back to the front room.

“O, there they are,” Becky said as she saw them come in. Jamie kept a fake smile on his face, the same smile he used at the rare parties he went to back home or when meeting new people when he didn’t want to. He assumed this was Daniel and Lauren.

“O, he’s adorable,” Lauren said to Becky.

Daniel knelt on one knee and put out his hand, “Daniel Webb, damn glad to meet ya!”

“Stop it,” Lauren snickered, giving her husband a gentle smack on the shoulder, but she couldn’t help but chuckle. Rebecca always joshed her brother that it was a good thing his wife thought he was funny.

The exchange felt a little intimidating, but Jamie thought it was funny too. “Hi, I’m Jamie.” He held out his hand, and it disappeared entirely into Daniel’s. He’d though Rebecca and Amanda were so big, and here was an Amazon man, taller and heavier, just like the average human man compared to the average woman. Daniel gently shook Jamie’s hand and let it go.

“You can call me Uncle Daniel or Danny or Dan or whatever you’re comfortable with.”

“Thank you.”

He gestured to his right, “This is your Aunt Lauren.” She knelt down and went in for a hug, which by instinct he returned but with little conviction.

“And you can call me Laurie.”

“Nice to meet you.” That was the extent of Jamie’s social skills with strangers in the best of circumstances, which these were not. Dysfunctional families and angry kids? Those, he could deal with. But in a purely social setting, if that’s what his arrival party was, before Cheryl he hadn’t made a new friend in a long time.

Thankfully, though the party was for him, he wasn’t the center of attention. Daniel and Lauren stood back up and continued their conversation with Becky.

“So how are you doing,” Lauren asked.

“We’re doing great.” Jamie felt an unexpected sense of solidarity. Ya hear that, he wanted to say, ‘We.’

“Is he sleeping through the night?”

“O, like a lamb. He doesn’t even wake up during his feedings.” I’m getting feedings, he wondered.

“How long until he’s back on solid foods?”

“Almost seven weeks, but I think we’ll keep up the nighttime bottle ritual.”

“How are you doing, Amanda,” Daniel asked. He nodded toward the couch and the two of them started walking away. Jamie didn’t want to stand there being talked about, so he reached up and tugged on the hem of Amanda’s shorts. Midsentence with Daniel, she reached down and lifted him onto her hip, and the three of them walked across the living room to sit down on the couch.

“Good. This has been just the best summer.”

“How do like all this? Big change from being an only child?”

“This little guy?” Jamie turned to look at her, and she looked down into his eyes. “He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” Jamie wanted everyone to leave so he could snuggle into Amanda and stay that way until hunger or thirst forced them to get up. But he had guests, and he didn’t want to be rude.

“Didn’t I tell you,” Daniel smiled. “Can I?” He looked eagerly at Amanda.

“I’m not the one you need to ask.”

Daniel held his arms out a bit. “Well, buddy?” Not wanting to be rude and worried about getting off on the wrong foot, Jamie looked first at Amanda as though asking for reassurance. She gave Jamie a quick nod, and then he nodded at Daniel, his mouth dry. Daniel lifted Jamie off Amanda’s lap and put him in his own.

This is different, Jamie thought. Amanda and Becky both felt impossibly strong, but Daniel even more so. He wasn’t as soft, but he was soft enough. He just felt more firm and secure.

“So Jamie, what do you like to do?”

“Uh …” It didn’t feel like he did much at all. He hung out, or so it seemed to him. “I guess I like to …” What is it I do all day, he wondered. He thought it through. “I have some blocks I like to build stuff with, and Amanda picked out this really neat coloring book. And I spend a lot of time outside.”

“Do you like your swing set?”

“Uncle Danny helped put it together,” Amanda interjected.

“Yeah, I do. Thank you for helping.”

“You’re welcome. Do you like to play any sports?”

“I used to.”

“Like what?”

“Um, do you have baseball here?”

“I’ve heard of it, but bigs don’t play it. I bet I can find some stuff for it, though. Would you like that?”

“Um, I don’t want to ask for anything.”

“How about some time you and I get away and go do guy stuff?”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know. Wrestle, go to truck rallies, watch action movies, scratch where we’re not supposed to, go drinking. I bet I could pick up a lot of chicks if I took you to a bar.” Jamie laughed. I guess I am kind of a babe magnet here, sort of, he thought.

“Geez, isn’t it the best feeling when they smile at you,” Daniel said to Amanda.

“What are you guys talking about,” Lauren asked from across the room.

“Tell her,” Daniel said.

“Guy stuff,” Jamie answered with a smile, and everyone got a laugh out of that. Amanda, Daniel and Jamie went back to their conversation.

Becky caught Lauren watching her husband with a sly smile on her face. “He looks good holding a little, doesn’t he,” Becky said. She was awfully fond of her kid brother. “You guys talk anymore about having one of your own … a baby, I mean?”

Lauren was about to answer when there were three sharp knocks at the door. “We’ll talk later,” Lauren whispered. Becky opened the door. Jamie couldn’t see into the foyer.

“Jane! O, it’s so good to see you,” he heard Becky say.

“You, too. Feels like it’s been ages.”

“Come in.”

Becky appeared around the corner followed by a woman just a little heavier than her, with brown hair instead of blonde. She stooped a little coming around the corner, taking off a pair of sunglasses with her right hand and holding the strap of her purse with her left. “And this must be the famous Jamie I’ve been hearing so much about!” Her voice took on a lilt, and she set her things down just inside the living room. She crossed to the couch, and Danny took his hands off Jamie, who turned an eye over his shoulder and then back to this new person, who bent at the waist to look him in the eye. Her hands were clasped between her knees.

“Hi, Jamie! I’m Jane. I’m one of your mommy’s friends,” she said in a sing-song tone pitched an octave and a half above what Jamie could tell was her normal voice.

Lauren and Becky followed her, and Lauren sat on a love seat opposite the couch.

“Actually, Jane, we’re not there yet on names,” Becky said on Jamie’s behalf. Jane turned back to Jamie.

“I’m sorry, Jamie. My mistake.” This time she said it in her normal voice, and Amanda made room for her on the couch.

“That’s okay. It’s nice to meet you.”

“So Jamie, how are you liking it here?”

“At Becky’s house? I’m getting used to it.”

“Sorry, I meant in our town.”

“O, I guess I haven’t gotten to see much of it yet.”

Becky interjected. “He’s still adjusting and healing. So far we only went to the store.”

“I see,” Jane said, turning back to Jamie. “When you’re ready, how’d you like to meet me and Rosie at the park?”

“Who’s Rosie?”

Jane’s face turned sour and she scoffed. Jamie was afraid he’d said something wrong. Jane turned back to look at Becky. “Really, Becky?” Her voice was filled with sarcasm. “Rosie is my little.”

“O.” Jamie hadn’t met another little yet, and he’d only glimpsed a few at the store. “I’d like that.”

“Rosie can’t wait to meet you. She’s eager for another playmate. She’s playing at our neighbor’s house today.”

Jamie was nervous at meeting other littles, but at the same time he was starting to get anxious to talk to a human, one who could hopefully fill him in on what he should know. He needed to hear the perspective of someone from his side of things.

The doorbell rang.

“That’ll be Mom,” Becky said. Jamie wasn’t sure exactly how, but her voice sounded different.

“She came,” Jane asked.

“Of course she came,” Becky answered defensively. She held out her hand. “C’mere, Jamie. Let’s open the door together.” Danny helped him down, and he took Becky’s hand.

Up until now, Jamie had been feeling such relief. Everyone was nice to him, and he really liked Danny. But now he was picking up on a weird dynamic.

Once in the foyer, Becky guided Jamie in front of her before she opened the door. An older woman walked in, dressed in dark colors out of season for summer. Becky placed both her hands on the tops of Jamie’s shoulders.

“Hello, Mom.” It was said warmly and precisely.

“Good afternoon, Rebecca.” The woman bent down and seemed to inspect Jamie. So far, he hadn’t felt on display, but now he felt he was being scrutinized. No one in the living room could see.

“Does he talk?”

Defensively, Jamie quickly answered on his own. “Hello, I’m Jamie.” She smiled at that, and looked up at her daughter.

“Hmm. He’s very verbal,” the older woman said.

“Thank you,” Becky replied. Wait, that was a compliment, Jamie thought. The woman turned her attention back to Jamie.

“I’m your grandma.”

“It’s nice to meet you. What’s your name,” he asked as he held out his hand.

“Grandma,” she answered, slowly, her hand dripping with well-meaning condescension as she shook his. “Grand-ma.”

Jamie wanted to be diplomatic here. He once again reminded himself to be generous, not to assume the worst. Perhaps she just hadn’t been told much about him. And he certainly didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, even if his own feelings weren’t being especially respected at the moment. “Uh … what else can I call you,” he asked as he took his hand back.

“Uh, let’s see. Granny. Nana.”

Some people need to be hit over the head. “I’d rather call you by your name, for now.”

“I’d rather you didn’t.” Some people hit back. Her tone made it plain she meant it.

There’s always two kinds of grandmas, Jamie pondered. The sweet ones who will spoil you when you’re little and be a safe confidant when you’re older. And that other kind, the this-is-a-hierarchy-and-I’m-at-the-top-and-you’re-at-the-bottom kind.

Another test of wills, Jamie thought, Fine – ‘Hey You’ it is until further notice. The way she spoke to him, even looked at him, made Jamie feel like a foster kid in a new home again, where sometimes he found one of the new people in his life regarded him with barely disguised disdain, as though they judged him for being parentless. He didn’t always help himself in those situations, lashing back out with sarcasm to show, if nothing else, he was clever.

“Actually, ma’am …” He couldn’t be faulted for calling her that, could he? “… I prefer to be called Mister Tibbs.”

She was visibly perplexed. No one had told her his name was Tibbs, and what little did any self-respecting big call Mister except when the little was in trouble.

“Excuse me?”

“They call me ‘MISTER Tibbs.’” Of course, no one understood the reference. Jamie could have kept a straight face were it not for the astonishment on hers. He belly-laughed and couldn’t stop himself. He hadn’t been so rude in many years, and yet something about the entire situation overcame his better judgment and inhibitions, and he did what felt good. She condescended to him, so he mocked her.

“Hi Grandma,” Amanda swept in to defuse the situation. “I haven’t seen you in so long!”

“What are you talking about? You saw me three weeks ago.”

“O, well I guess it just feels like a long time.” Amanda took her grandma’s arm and led her toward the kitchen.

“That’s a very rude little your mother picked out. Did she find him at the pound?”

“O, I know! Isn’t he the worst,” Amanda answered in her syrupy whatever-makes-you-happy-Grandma tone, but she turned around so her grandma couldn’t see and winked at Jamie.

Becky wasn’t so pleased, but Jamie couldn’t tell with whom. She sighed, and walked back into the living room, where Lauren, Danny, and Jane were red faced and stifling guffaws.

Lauren held out her hand to Jamie, and feeling more comfortable now, he walked over to her. Lauren had been made to feel much the same way when Danny first introduced her to her future mother-in-law, except she didn’t have the excuse of being a little to answer back.

She patted the seat next to her and Jamie climbed up. “I like you a lot,” she said. “She’s not gonna forget that, just so you know.”

“Thanks for the warning.”