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The Price of Success: How Some Friendships Fade Away

Added 2023-05-18 14:27:54 +0000 UTC

It's no wonder that being at the top can be lonely. This widely acknowledged belief reflects the idea that people in high positions often feel isolated and alone.

This applies to anyone who has achieved success in their field.

You can define success, leadership, or winning in various ways.

It could be:

Earning a very high BASE salary in your career
Completing a marathon
Getting into the best physical shape of your life
Becoming a wealthy multi-millionaire
Securing a high level promotion at your job
Achieving remarkable growth for your business startup
Winning an award
Having an amazing and loving GF/BF

Ultimately, success involves accomplishing a challenging and rare goal that elevates your status as a societal symbol and signifies reaching a higher level with a greater purpose.

It's completely natural for people to drift apart and feel a bit lonelier as they go through life.

As we grow older, move to different places, or shift our perspectives, we often lose touch with others. However, there's another factor at play as well.

There's a greater chance of losing friends after achieving a certain level of "success" and climbing the social ladder, irrespective of personal views on materialism and societal hierarchies.

Today I’ll talk about several reasons why we can lose friends after becoming successful.

1. Fortune Breeds Jealousy

A genuine friend would never feel envious of someone else's success.

However, finding true friends is very, very rare.

It's a natural human emotion to experience some frustration and anger when witnessing someone else's achievements and social advancement, particularly in terms of financial or material success.

Seeing a friend accumulate wealth can trigger resentment because it reminds people of their own mistakes, setbacks, and imperfections.

This resentment is clearly detrimental and, if left unaddressed, can swiftly bring an end to years of a friendship.

2. Feelings Of Guilt

Money guilt and success guilt are common feelings. It can affect your mental health and relationships.

Successful individuals often look around and question whether their hardworking friends might have deserved the same level of success or if their own achievements came too easily compared to others who are more talented.

Unfortunately, the world doesn't operate on a level playing field, and many of us achieve success due to fortunate circumstances and timing.

Recognising this reality can generate a sense of guilt because many incredibly hardworking and intelligent people never seem to catch their big break.

Allowing this guilt to linger for too long can intensify feelings of isolation.

Part of this guilt, if left to marinate too long, will lead to further feelings of isolation.

3. Successful People Hate Excuses

Regardless of what form of “success” one achieves, we slowly get tired of listening to people’s problems.

Successful people are known for their positive attitudes and for applying the law of attraction to improve their lives.

Yes, luck plays a part in success, but it is equally other parts ambition, discipline, knowledge, and energy to achieve success.

Yet, at one point in all our lives, we knew a friend that was unwilling to listen to advice and would fall into the same traps over and over again — toxic relationships, terrible life choices, or poor financial decisions.

These situations frustrate successful people.

It drives us insane because such friends won’t take the necessary actions to improve their lives, even when the answers are right in front of them. This leads to gradual distancing between friends.

Anger at the level of inaction or pessimism will overpower feelings of friendship.

4. Friend Selection Becomes More Exacting

Building friendships comes naturally when we're young.

Many of your current friends are those you grew up with, even if you don't have much in common anymore.

Most of your young friendships and relationships are just struggle friends and relationships.

You're young, don't have nothing about from each other, so you had no other choice but to be friends, but there is no substance or true to meaning to the relationship.

In your youth, you strive to maintain connections with as many people as possible, even if they are simply your classmates.

However, as time passes and life experiences shape you, you become more picky in choosing your friendships.

That's why it becomes increasingly challenging to form genuine, lasting friendships in adulthood.

Bonds formed during your teenage years will loosen, as people move away in distance, time, and matured personalities.

Generally, people don’t seek to associate with losers. It’s harsh but it’s the truth. And successful people seek to associate with other people they admire, people that talk the same 'language' and share that same commitment to excellence and drive.

Successful people want more interesting friendships and hear more unique opinions than those in the general populace.

After all, you are the summation of the top 5 people you spend the most time with.

The ones that are closest to you have the biggest impact on your behaviour so it DOES matter with whom you spent your time.

5. Lack Of Time

Regarding time, this point mainly applies to individuals who achieve success through extensive work hours.

Even passive income sources require periodic monitoring and nurturing.

Building an empire necessitates sacrificing one's time.

However, even for those who attain success through unconventional methods and have relinquished control (such as early retirement), time STILL remains a crucial consideration.

Time is everyone’s most valuable currency, but the unfortunate reality is that the average person will never realise this.

Successful people recognise this fact early in life, and knowledge of this finite amount of time fuels their ambition and urge to execute, create, and build…destroying any walls of procrastination shown before them.

6. Power Imbalances

Successful individuals can come across as imposing. At their best, they possess a "IDGAF" attitude towards opinions and topics since they genuinely consider them inconsequential.

At their worst, interactions can be intimidating because the other person is aware of a natural power imbalance.

There’s a much lower need for social validation because successful people have already proved their abilities to the most important person: themselves.

When you’ve reached high levels of self-sufficiency, independence, and/or wealth, it becomes super straightforward (perhaps even the automatic reaction) to stop caring about what others think.

Successful people don’t need to seek to impress others anymore, and thus are wary of any (transactional) interactions with less-than-pure intentions seeking to take advantage of their abundance.

While it is possible to achieve a level of “F U” success or money without having an “F U” attitude…it is difficult and not the norm for most people.

7. Feelings Of Isolation

It is cold and lonely at the top of the mountain.

There is less air, and therefore fewer people at the peak.

This saying applies to life and the feeling of isolation once you climb to those peaks — in your career, net worth, or what have you.

As you achieve success, it becomes increasingly challenging for people to relate to you. Few individuals truly comprehend the inner workings of your unique mind.

Your entire life perspective and way of thinking has shifted to a different level compared to your old friends.

Your inherent aura, personality, and habits will either attract followers towards you or cause the more hesitant ones to be repelled by your presence.

This is a natural.