chambersjr

(ARTICLE) 10 Red Flags In A New Relationship

Added 2022-05-19 12:28:36 +0000 UTC

1. They repeatedly disrespect your boundaries.

Maybe they try to convince you to do something you’ve clearly said that you don’t want to do, or they simply go too far and cross a line. When they keep pushing your boundaries, or even break them, they’re not the person you want to trust.

Make it clear that they must respect your boundaries if they want to keep dating you.

For example, you should end things with someone who insists that you get sexually involved even though you’ve said you want to take things slow.

Or perhaps they push you to do something you’re not yet comfortable doing, like committing to them or making the next step in the relationship.

A person who knowingly disrespects your boundaries is likely to keep doing so throughout the relationship.

Don't be a doormat.

2. They disrespect you.

It’s not just love that you need from a partner... it’s respect too.

Someone who disrespects you isn’t a good partner.

Maybe they don’t trust you to make an adult decision, roll their eyes at you, dismiss your opinions, or talk down on you.

However they disrespect you, it’s a red flag to watch for because their behaviour is unlikely to change later on in a relationship.

In fact, it could even get worse.

So, while you certainly shouldn’t fear each other in any way, you should have mutual respect. It’s a necessary part of a healthy relationship and a sign of how this person is going to treat you.

3. They talk badly about all their exes.

When dating, it’s best not to even talk about exes.

Yes, a couple has to discuss the topic of each other’s past relationships, but the basic information is typically enough.

But what if they trash talk their ex instead? A person who talks badly about all their exes or even calls them all crazy for leaving them is likely to do the same with you.

Sure, they may not like their exes, but most people are self-aware enough to accept their fair share of the blame and mature enough not to talk badly about someone just because their relationship broke down.

A person who refuses to acknowledge their own shortcomings by badmouthing their exes is likely not self-aware enough to be in a healthy relationship.

4. They use name-calling in fights.

Are they ready and willing to say things that they can’t unsay later?

Name calling is a good example of not respecting the line in arguments.

It is a sign of poor conflict resolution skills, which is rarely a good sign for a relationship. It’s certainly an easy red flag to spot.

5. They have drastic mood swings.

One day, they are the best person you could imagine, but the next day they push all your buttons just so they can continue the cycle the third day.

Drastic mood swings are a sign of an unstable individual who might be emotionally immature.

If you have to guess what kind of mood you’ll find them in, and it could change at any second, you probably aren’t going to have a healthy relationship with them.

You need someone mature and stable who you’ll be able to count on. You simply can’t count on someone that unpredictable.

Of course, anyone can experience occasional moods swings, but if they are so continuous that they’re part of the person’s personality, that’s not going to change any time soon.

6. They are too secretive.

Your partner should be honest and open with you.

While they might not want to reveal everything on the first few dates, you should have a good idea of who they are by the time you’re in a committed relationship.

This means that, while it’s okay to be mysterious, being secretive is a whole other thing. If you feel like your partner is hiding something from you this early in the relationship, imagine how it will be later on.

Naturally, they might not want you to know certain things right away, but they won’t be secretive about little things that don’t really matter. If they are, they might be hiding a much bigger problem, such as not wanting you to really get to know them in the first place.

7. They was cheating WITH you.

A person who cheated on someone with you is more likely to cheat on you with someone else.

This is especially true if their romantic history consists of jumping right into new relationships after ending old ones.

Based on the fact that they cheated with you, who’s to say they’ll stay faithful to you?

If they have a history of cheating on their partners, the chances of them doing so again increase.

Of course, not everyone who cheats does it again, but the odds don’t work in your favour.

8. They want to know all your passwords.

There should be no secrets in a healthy relationship, but there should be privacy.

It’s great if you and your partner can be open about each other’s online activity, but wanting to monitor it smells like trouble.

Why would they demand to know all your passwords if they trusted you?

WITHOUT TRUST, A RELATIONSHIP CANNOT WORK!

I REPEAT!

WITHOUT TRUST, A RELATIONSHIP CANNOT WORK!

While you shouldn’t be secretive about your online activity, you should be entitled to your privacy and autonomy.

If you have done something to raise suspicion, you might be able to understand them, otherwise, demanding to know all your passwords is a red flag.

Similarly, if you find them snooping through your phone or other devices behind your back, take note and ask yourself whether you can ever trust them.

9. They crave constant reassurance.

You constantly have to repeat that you like them and want to be with them, and they don’t seem to trust you even when you do.

This is draining...

A partner who constantly seeks reassurance is probably so insecure that no amount of comforting words will help them overcome those insecurities.

It’s hard to have a healthy relationship with an insecure person, so it might be best to avoid getting involved in the first place.

While you could certainly help them fight their insecurities, consider whether it’s what you want to do with your life. It’s okay to be selfish when you’re searching for the right person.

10. They are abusive.

Of course, when dating someone new, or in the early days of a relationship, one of the red flags to watch for is abusive behaviour.

Whether it’s emotional, psychological, or even physical abuse, you shouldn’t tolerate it for more than a second, and the second when it happens is already too much.

If you’ve noticed abusive behaviour in a person you’ve only recently started seeing, end things before you’re in too deep.

You should never tolerate abuse of any kind, no matter how much you like someone, so get away from them before you fall in love with them and let them hurt you.

If they are ready to hurt you with their words or their actions without blinking an eye, it could only get worse if you stay with them.