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EARLY ACCESS: STORMWEAVER 2 - Chapter 22 [ROUGH] [UPDATE]

I didn't like how 22 ended, so I've reworked the conversation between Rei and Viv at the end. Still needs work, but interested to hear what yall think!

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A few rules & reminders:

That's it, so without further ado... Enjoy!

Comments

The adobe app has"liquid mode" which automatically reformats the pdf to fit you devices screen size. It reads much better on phones when I use that feature

Philip Maynard

That was much better. IMO. Felt like the proper amount of frustration and annoyance compared to the first convo that felt "too easy" to me.

Doug Wills

What’s the best way to read these chapters on a phone? If I open them in the app the page width is annoying. The only work around is saving to notes and then I can read in landscape or portrait. What do you guys do?

Mark Peters

is there a thread that speculates on grants baggage? presumably it has something to do with this dad? there were some clues in book 1 but I dont remember them all :')

Jonathan Dugal

I love what you're doing, keep it up!

I can't wait till Rei tells the other two and grant shares his baggage going to be great

Tiffany Miller

are they famous for a strong internal bond? if so, do you have a source for that? Would be interesting to read... Side note; to me as a non-US citizen, US special/black Ops is sometimes a bit of an ambiguous topic, I'm not sure how psyched I am about associating a Novel with it. But that's really just me.

PaulBFB

another Seal Team Six

Joanne Hans

Yeah I can only agree with everyone this is a clear improvement. I especially appreciate how Rei stresses the fact that the actual issue is not that Viv developed feelings for Grant (not like she has control over that) but that she didn't talk to him. I love how he called it "this stupid dance" - that's just spot on, chefs kiss. Could totally see me talking to my friends like that. And I like the hints there that 1 Grant has secrets as big as Reis Fibro and Shido and was in a bad state because of them ("I couldn't leave him like that ") 2 Rei will tell Grant and Cashe soon So soon Firesong will just be one big happy family ^^

PaulBFB

Gotta say that is much more fulfilling yeah, like it much more than the other version. Awesome work 👌🏻

Ethan

I like the revised version a lot, much more rounded imo 👍

Dougie Mitchell

Great revise, love this version better 😊

Linda Thompson

Rei already suspected there was a relationship. He might not be thrilled about it but acting all emotionally injured and petty is less than heroic. This version is better. Rei needs to be a man readers can root for. He needs to be smart. Determined, talented, strong, calculating, kind, those are all good. Self aware and smart is better.

Lyn Shirley

You know, I really respect that Bryce doesn't want correction feedback and I have never been tempted to give any feedback that way because he has editors and such for that... but I am very concerned that Reese went the full monty with the kids. Around here that'd get you a criminal record for indecent exposure for sure. I'm pretty sure NOBODY wants to see Reese going full monty, even Mrs Reese.

Andrew Tobin

I am reminded of a scene from the original Robocop, where Clarence Boddicker's team are given a few M2 Battle Rifles, and Emil puts a round into a pawn shop, blows it to hell, and just shouts "I like it!" The added conversation is pretty much what needed to happen as a bridge for Viv, between the relationships she had with Rei and Grant before he told her about himself, versus after that.

John Cooke


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