January 2018

It's been a slow month of uploads, especially for AO3, but rest assured, I am writing. I'm just mostly writing original things, and writing them all at once, so I can't really call any of them 'finished'.

I've also been digging through old stuff and trying to fix holes and revising them, and then writing those along, so January's been a lot of work! I mostly have WIPs though so :(

That aside, it's been such a fun month! 

My writing for Lullaby is actually coming along well (and, hint hint: we're having ciphers, so buckle up and polish your cryptography knowledge ladies and gents and nonbinary secret agents, because this isn't easy-peasy Gravity Falls-style codes), although I'll admit that the next few chapters have undergone so much revision because I had to make sure I was keeping just enough things secret while still revealing everything in broad daylight.

Here's a little sneak peek of the next chapter. I still need to finalize it though:

Karkat sits back down. “I’m just tired, okay?” The physical fatigue, he could take. The fact that he can do everything the Heir of Blood is saying just makes him want to lie down and not wake up.

Kanaya opens her mouth and then deliberates. Karkat sees her running her options through her head, discarding things quickly and then idling on a thought, before shaking her head. “You said you had help with the nightmares.”

“They don’t always arrive on time.”

Her hands curl in tighter. She’s probably digging her nails hard enough to draw blood. “They should be faster.”

The TV might have flickered briefly in offense, but that’s probably just Karkat’s imagination. He snorts. “They’re trying.”

“It probably has something to do with similar aspects,” Davesprite says.

Karkat raises an eyebrow.

“What? My sister nerded on and on about this. I listened.”

He snorts again, and waves a hand for him to continue.

As for my original works - if you remember the little oneshot regarding Hollow Cause and Maru Hanya, I'm working on a post-plot thingy for it just so I know where the story is going and to explore a bit more about the world, because believe me when I say I remember next to nothing about this universe and shocked myself upon reading the oneshot. And then of course dug through all of my notes about it that I could find, which was also, next to none.

Lookit this new thingy I wrote about this universe:  

Hollow drew in a breath and huffed. “Fine.” He sat down, crossed-legged, but too fast that he bent a foot the wrong way and there was a sick crunch.

The kids made a face and collectively groaned, “Eww.”

“Grow up, you fucking babies.” Hollow stuck the leg out and snapped the foot back into place.

My old soulmate story (have I mentioned that before? I think I have), I'm revising and am worldbuilding, and I love the new angle I'm exploring the story in. I'm doing the same thing with another NaNoWriMo piece.

For that soulmate one, I literally just wrote this one this week, so, again, still unedited snack pack:

When William Rivera Amemah was nine, he woke up in the middle of the night to the screams of Mizar is dead, Mizar is dead, Mizar is dead, in his head.

He’d ripped off the blankets that had somehow wound their way around his neck - a makeshift noose – thrashed when they wouldn’t come off as quickly as he wanted them to, fell off of the bed and crawled to a corner of the room to put his head in his hands and rock himself back and forth, crying.

There was a scream lodged somewhere in his gut. It wasn’t his.

He stayed there for a while, trying to remember how to breathe, counting the seconds as he ran through the exercises. He’d paid attention to the books he’d read at the library. He’d been rather excited to take them home when he read about the breathing part – so it wasn’t unsolvable after all, and he didn’t need to sit and cry and hope he wasn’t going to die every time this happened. He’d smuggled the books up to his room, past his aunt (even when she’d said countless times that no, he didn’t need to do that, but old habits die hard and clung even after death to stubborn children like Will), and read them again and again and again, about why these things happened and how he could deal with them.

It was useful, Will thought, as it had helped him with all the panic attacks he’d had after. Of course it didn’t work like magic, and he didn’t expect it to because good things didn’t fall out of the sky, but at least he had something he could do to help himself.

He was still rocking back and forth in the corner of the room, even after his breaths had steadied. He’d stopped crying, thankfully, and that scream in his gut was still there, coupled with disbelief and grief and an awful sense of freefalling. Like the floor had been pulled out from under him, and suddenly there was just nothingness and the loss of control.

He frowned, put a hand on his stomach and whimpered. 

The continuous loop of Mizar is dead had stopped now, and Will could only feel the occasional thought of It’s my fault in his head, sobbed by a small, helpless voice that he imagined belonged to the person on the other end of the empathy bond. 

There was no way to control it, according to the same books he’d read about the breathing – the medical field was expanding into studying soulmate theory after all – and Will frowned for a moment. It should, he thought, because this was unfair. Sending It’s okay you’re okay I’m here I’m your friend shouldn’t be too hard to pass to someone who literally held another piece of your soul.

He closed his eyes and thought as hard as he could, thought about sympathy and the desire to extend comfort. All he got back was more grief.

Will just buried his face in his knees and cried, and hoped his soulmate was alright.

As for fics, I have too many ideas for an obscure thing, which is just cause for a big sigh on my part, because I love writing for it, but most people don't know of it. But, I write for my own enjoyment mostly, and if people like it, then good! 

(I'm not even going to show the list of AUs I was planning, to be honest, I'm too self-indulgent.)

Also, I dug up a few notes on my GroupTale AU, so there's that. I might delve into it a bit more, but no promises. Just an update on how I've been doing regarding revisiting my own imagination.

It's been so much fun writing things again, and I'll admit that most of my inspiration comes from roleplaying (shhh, let me live) and talking about my ideas with friends. I just love getting feedback about things, it's gratifying. I'm also so glad that 2018 is off to a good start in regards to writing.

Also, I did keep a counter for how much I wrote for January 2018 (not counting anything I wrote for roleplays, which, I probably should), and this month's total number is: 37640 words! It wouldn't pass NaNoWriMo but, it's lengthy enough!

Here's hoping February's even better!