Early Drafts

Hey folks. Just thought we'd share a little behind the scenes look at the evolution of our writing process. Below are a few first drafts of some texts we ran recently along with how the final version turned out. Some of these were cut shorter for length, rearranged for comedy, or just rewritten because one of thought of a better punch line. Enjoy and as always, you're all great!

First Draft:

Hal: Hey, there’s something wrong with my new ring. I can’t hear any communications with it.
Oa Guardian: Your old listening device isn’t compatible with the new ring. You’ll need a new one or you’ll need a dongle to connect the old one.
Hal: There was nothing in the box.
Oa: You have to buy the dongle separately.
Hal: Ugh, fine, I’ll get the new listening device.
Oa: Great. Don’t forget to charge them.
Hal: I HAVE TO CHARGE THEM?

Final Version:

Guardian: We have a new version of the ring coming out. You should come get a new one.
Hal: What's wrong with my old ring?
G: We just released an update that's going to make it incredibly slow.
H: Can you fix the update?
H: No, it's on purpose to make you upgrade.
H: I guess I'll get the new one then. I can still use my old lantern to charge it right?
G: Of course! With a dongle.
H: I need a dongle now?
G: Dongle sold separately.
H: THIS IS WHY PEOPLE CONVERT TO THE RED LANTERN!

First Draft:

Robin: I did it! I finally did it!

Alfred: Did what Master Robin?

Robin: I got Batman to laugh at one of my jokes.

Alfred: Well done, sir! What was the joke?

Robin: I punched a henchman in the mouth and said, “Ain’t that the teeth?” It killed him.

Alfred: Really?

Robin: Absolutely. He laughed super hard.

Robin: Unrelated question, which pouch do we keep the Joker-gas antidotes in?

Final Version:

Robin: I finally did it! I got Batman to laugh at one of my jokes.

Alfred: Well done, sir! What was the joke?

Robin: I punched Joker in the mouth and said, “Ain’t that the teeth?” He laughed super hard.

Alfred: Give Batman a laughing gas antidote pill now! Joker poisoned him!

R: No he's just laughing at my very good joke.

A: "Ain't that the teeth" is not a good joke. THAT'S NOT ANYTHING! 

R: Sure it is, it's a fun play on words. Batman loves it. He just collapsed laughing.

A: Please Master Robin he's dying!

R: Should I be a stand-up?

First Draft:

Tony: Hey big guy, I’m having trouble dealing with all the snap deaths. What’s the best way to deal with death?

Thor: Maybe just repress it I guess? Pretend to be happy.

Tony: That’s the best you got? Come on, you’re a 1500 year old warrior, you must have tons of experience with people dying.

Thor: Actually I don’t. It’s only since I met the Avengers that I lost my father, mother, brother, all my friends and now half of the universe. You people are truly a curse and death follows you everywhere!

Tony: Well I feel better.

Final Version:

Tony: Hey big guy, I'm pretty messed up after these snap deaths. You’re a 1,500 year old warrior you must have advice for dealing with a huge loss.

Thor: Actually I don’t. It’s only since I met the Avengers that I lost my father, mother, brother, all my friends and now half of the universe. You people are truly a curse and death follows you everywhere! 

Tony: Oh god why do you still hang out with us?

Thor: You're literally all I have left. 

Tony: Damn. Well don't worry we aren't going anywhere buddy.

Thor: Wrong! You are all mortal and I will undoubtedly watch each of you die before my eyes.

Tony: I'm SO much sadder than when I first texted you.

First Draft:

Cap: So we've narrowed down our newest member to either Iron Fist or Spiderman.
Hawkeye: I vote Iron Fist.
Tony: Spiderman for sure.
Hawkeye: You can't be serious.
Tony: What's wrong with Spiderman?
Hawkeye: Iron Fist trained exclusively in martial arts for fifteen years. He's a disciplined soldier and we're a military-like defense team! Spiderman is a regular dude with no experience who got bit by a spider.
Tony: He's a real nice kid though.
Hawkeye: HE'S A KID?!?!
 

Final Version:
Cap: We could use a new member. Any ideas?
Tony: I vote Spider-Man.
Hawkeye: Are you kidding me!? Iron Fist all the way.
Bruce: The guy with the glowing fist? Come on Clint even I know that's lame.
Hawkeye: So a kid accidentally bitten by a spider is cooler than a disciplined guy who trained hard for decades to be the best at what he does?
Thor: Verily.
Tony: Hard work is for nerds.
Thor: It reeks of effort.