EB - Chapter 10 - Full Text

Hi there dear Patron,

Week going well? I made the terrible decision of going to bed well past my bedtime last Sunday, and no matter what I do, I can't seem to catch up on sleep. So worth it! I was engrossed in a story I hadn't enjoyed in a while and it wouldn't let me save at one point and I kept going and next thing you know you are playing another hour and by then you are almost done and...

So yeah, my week has been tiring, but overall fantastic. And I hope whatever shape your week is in, today's post will make it a bit brighter or perhaps a little spicier at the very least.

The full tenth chapter of Experimental Business! Ready for you!

This chapter spanned some time that saw me busier than I'd like to be and in a time of great tumult, but I got through it and still managed to get the words out as well. Not too bad, right? Not ideal, not what I want since I know I am capable of so much more, but sometimes just getting something out there in the way you can is all you are capable of.

I read a self-help book recently. (I actually listened to it. Avid audio booker if you didn't know.) And one of the concepts was that you always gotta do your best. Obvious right? But there is a fiat behind that language. An expectation and almost a trap within those words.

I did so much better back then, what I am doing now (despite putting in 110%) isn't nearly as good as then. Therefore... (Insert meaningless self deprication loop all the way to the darkest hells of all belief systems. Thankfully the hell in mine is like a hot spring with gorons and I am only moderately discomforted by it. The conversation is still good and they rag on me for being so hot, but we get out eventually and its all good.)

Anyway, the thing with 'your best' is that it changes. Your best changes every day, every hour, sometimes every minute. That idea and that acceptance and understanding that what you did while you were down was your best is so important to me. Do your best with what you have available, mental resources, physical ability, emotional stability, external forces, etc.

I am still doing my best and I know you are doing yours as well. If you are so quick to deny my encouragement, then know you are doing your best at something. I still love you for it. It has taken me more than two decades to allow myself to be less than perfect "in my mind." I won't get into the speech about how I started hating school after I got a single B. (Still dislike math to this day. Also realize as an adult if I'd have learned it more pragmatically, I'd love it. I'm happy with my love of language in either case. When's the last time you got off to a calculator or some numbers? Oh wait...)

Ah, this is hitting a bit too close to home so I will cut it off here.

Please enjoy this chapter of EB and please continue to do you best at whatever you do. I am doing mine at this and believe it or not, my job as well! It's exhausting, but we gotta do it.

Ta ta~

~Michelle